And then there was that one time Trixie became a communist

by Blarghalt


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The inhabitants of the dark room sat patiently as they awaited the unknown sender of the strangely-worded letter that was sent to each of them to come inside the room. The letter itself was something extremely odd: all it said was to come to the executive room of the cider factory and wait for further instructions, along with personalized reasons for each recipient to travel there. More than one of them expected some kind of trap.

"This is lame," Gilda complained, pulling back the metal ball clicker and letting the tapping commence. Her letter had mentioned a way to get Rainbow Dash to stop hanging out with her loser friends. She didn't really believe that whoever sent it would be able to do so, but it was something to do.

"Agh! Stop the tapping! It sounds like the whiny one!" Rover said, covering his ears. He and his two friends had also received the letter, telling them that if they came they would receive more than enough labor for their gem mines.

"Make me!" Gilda challenged. The diamond dog slammed the table and growled at her rebellion and the two of them angrily glares into each other's eyes before another voice interrupted.

"Silence! Both of you!" Queen Chrysalis demanded. Neither Gilda nor Rover wanted to incur the ire of the changeling queen and quietly sat back in their chairs, still giving each other the evil eye. Chrysalis' letter had told her that the writer knew of a way to guarantee endless of supplies of love.

"I'm just here for the gems," Garble said in-between scarfing down the tray of glittering stones that was laid in front of him, while at the same time swatting Rover's paw away whenever he reached for some. His letter promised free food.

The assembled villains waited for a while. It was almost noon when Gilda spread her wings and got up from her chair, "That's it! I am so outta here. Later, dweebs."

As soon as she had finished her sentence the door flew open and in walked Trixie. Gone was her wizard's hat, and was now replaced by a peaked cap with a red star on the middle. Several medal of her own design glittered on her chess, and she carried herself with cautious arrogance.

"Who're you? You the guy who sent us these letters?" Gilda asked, sitting back down.

"How did you even know our address?" Spot demanded from a corner in the back.

"My letter came stapled to the side of a drone! What's the meaning of this!?"

"Comrades, comrades," Trixie calmly answered them, "I know you you all have questions, and I will be sure to set up a commission to address them. But we must first acknowledge our the first order of business: why I sent your letters."

"That's what we just—"

"I assure you, it is something that will change your lives!"

Chrysalis rolled her eyes and laughed, "Ha! I rule over millions of drones! What could you offer that would change my life?"

"How about a way to get ride of Celestia once and for all?"

"Right," Gilda interjected, "You know a way to kick the butt of someone who's literally a god."

"Yes," Trixie said, and her horn began to glow and she started an illusion. It showed the Elements of Harmony stowed away in a shadow of Canterlot Castle, "By stealing the Elements. Seizing them."

Rover raised his paw, "Uh, what's the Elements? We only really know about gems, digging, and..."

Fido jumped up, "Ooh! We know, uh, nope. That's it."

Chrysalis hovered a few inches above her seat and pointed at Trixie, "It took me a year of planning to infiltrate Canterlot, and I still couldn't get that door to the Elements open when I took over the city! What are you going to do?"

"Break the door down."

"Obviously," Gilda muttered.

Trixie used her magic to pop up avatars that showed cartoon heads of each of her planned accomplices. A red dotted line followed behind them as the graphic representation of the villains moved toward Canterlot, "Look. It's very simple. We sneak in, grab the Elements, and sneak out."

Chrysalis folded her front legs, "And what are you going to do with them? Sell them? I know only that Twilight pony and her friends can use them."

Trixie ceased her illusion with a poof, and smiled, "We're going to use them."

Garble did a spit-take with the gems in his mouth.

"It may sound impossible, but it's true."

The teenage dragon picked his teeth with his pinkie claw, "What? No. One of the gems had a rock in it. Yech."

Chrysalis protested yet again, "And how are you going to do that? Corrupt them?"

"The Glorious and Revolutionary Trixie intends to do exactly that!" she announced and her illusion magic once again flared to life as it showed a very complex array of magical steps, theories, and methods that would be used to turn the Elements to the changeling queen. Chrysalis flew up into the cloud itself and examined each step carefully.

"This is...brilliant," she admitted, "The magic checks out. But there's no way we can get to the room that houses the Elements!"

"The Egalitarian and Democratic Trixie disagrees. I happen to know of something kept on the very grounds of Canterlot that will help us get into that vault."

"And would that be?"

"The statue of Discord. We'll smash it down with his stone head."

Gilda flew up from her chair, "Oh no! We are not fooling with that! I am still picking cotton candy out of my ear from that crazy freak! See you dweebs later!"

Before she could open the door she was caught in place by Trixie's magic and struggled, "Let me go you hippie dork!"

"But Gilda," Trixie mocked, "Don't you want to be friends with Rainbow Dash again?"

"Dash would never talk to me again if I had something to do with letting Discord out! Let me out!"

The other villains in the room looked on in horror and Trixie shook her head, "Tsk tsk tsk. I'm afraid that line of thinking is exactly why Equestria is such a horrible, capitalistic state nowadays. I think you need a little insight."

Before GIlda could respond Trixie shot a brilliant white beam from her horn that caught the griffon right between the eyes. Her eyes went cross and she slumped to the floor. She lay there for a few second before getting back up.

Gilda looked at her claws contemplatively, "Man. If I could tear down capitalism, I'd be able to go anywhere I want. Me and Dash could hang out all the time!" She saluted Trixie, "Trix, whatever your plan is, I'm completely behind it! Workers of Equestria unite, dude!"

"What did you do to her!?" Chrysalis screamed.

"Made her see things my way. Just brainwashed enough to be a useful idiot, but still dumb enough to never question orders. To be fair, I had some practice on some fatcat brothers before her."

By this time Rover, Spot, and Fido were trying to climb out the window before the revolutionary unicorn brainwashed them too. She set them on the floor and they sprang up a moment later, proclaiming their loyalty for Trixie.

Chrysalis had been too shocked to take action so far, but knew it was now or never to break out. She ordered the two bulky changelings she had brought as bodyguards to charge Trixie as she broke out the window, but Trixie easily zapped both their brains and switched their liege in an instant. The queen had almost made it to the window before Gilda and the diamond dogs tackled and wrestled her to the ground, holding her in place.

Trixie slowly walked up to her, smiling, "You didn't really think I'd ever let a monarchist ally with me, would you? And that letter, did you ever pause to think why you didn't just burn it? Propaganda. In just a few short days we've gotten so good at it that I can just show a pony the color red and turn them to the revolution. I bet changelings, even queens, are even more weak to suggestion."

Chryalis hissed as Trixie blasted her. She managed to fight her for several minutes before her eyes rolled back into her head and she slumped to the ground and then rose back up.

"Comrade," Trixie said, "What's your name?"

"Queen Chrysalis, comrade!" Chrysalis responded. Her eyes weren't glazed over and her voice hollow like the Flim Flam brothers; the control she wad under was much like the kind she had placed on Shining Armor.

"No, no, no. That will never sound right. Do you want to see the world 'queen' on the state newspapers after we tear down the kingdom? No, your new name is Vanguard Chrysalis!"

Chrysalis nodded, and gave names to the others too. Gilda became Comrade Gilda, the Diamond Dogs became Fellow Workers Rover, Fido, and Spot, and the two changeling bodyguards were renamed Red 1 and Red 2.

Garble continued to eat, oblivious to the entire battle. It wasn't until Trixie's glowing horn practically poked him into the eye that he looked up, "Huh? Hey, you got any more rubies? There was only live four in h—" he managed to say before he was also re-educated.

---


Canterlot's security had been significantly beefed up since the changeling attack. Magic fields in place now automatically detected changelings, and Trixie was forced to leave them back at the factory. Chrysalis was powerful enough to evade detection with her disguises, and so was paired with Gilda to retrieve Discord's statue. Trixie, Garble, and the Diamond Dogs would move ahead and clear the guards that could stop them.

Evading the guards in the garden was easy enough for the griffon and the changeling queen. Gilda already had enough experience dodging the fuzz and Chrysalis would simply morph into a pot or bench whenever a guard came walking by. Not that it mattered; the garden was lightly patrolled anyway.

However, measures were still in place. A pair of guards now stood in front of the statue, mostly for show but still capable of raising alarm. They needed to be dealt with. Gilda put on her best well-behaved act and Chrysalis morphed into a tiny little unicorn filly as they both walked up to the statue.

"What's dat!" the disguised Chrysalis asked, pointed toward the statue frozen in perpetual disbelief and horror.

"Eh, that's just some nerd who thought he could take on the Elements of Harmony."

They walked a little closer in-between the two guards. The two soldiers just assumed it was the child of some rich parents and her bodyguard and paid no heed, "Oooh! How'd they turn him all rocky?" filly Chrysalis said in the most adorable voice possible.

"Like..." Gilda started, and reared back her claw before punching one of the guards in the side of his head and knocking him out, "This!"

The other guard whipped around but was unable to do anything as filly Chrysalis partially dropped her disguise and one her front legs resumed its normal side. She jumped up and karate chopped the guard on the head, sending him to the ground on top of his buddy. Gilda and Chrysalis high-fived before turning to the statue.

Gilda scratched the back of her head, "How are we going to move this dude?"

---

The guards in the gardens and the castle stood vigilantly. Nothing could come in their sight without the words "Halt! Who goes there?" being uttered.

At least, nothing above the ground. The Diamond Dogs worked busily digging through mountains, ever so often coming up under a guard and pulling him down if he was judged to be too dangerous. The tunnel stretch from the gardens to their current location, which was now under the foundation of the castle. Gilda and Chrysalis were dragging the statue from the back of the tunnel, and would be quite a while to make their way to the front. This gave Trixie and co. all the time in the world to make a tunnel directly beneath the building that housed the Elements.

When Chrysalis and Gilda finally came to the front of the tunnel, everything was ready. Trixie and Chrysalis combined their magic to shoot a hole at the top of the tunnel. The magic penetrated every floor and shot out of the roof of the castle. This also caused whatever guards they hadn't snatched to be immediately alerted to the intruders, and they had precious seconds before they were apprehended. Garble and Chrysalis flew as hard as the could while lifting the statue as Trixie contributed by levitating it as they shot up the holes they had created, to the top room. The dog were right behind them, hopping up every floor of the way.

The statue landed on the top floor with a clunk as the entire team assembled.

"It's now or never, comrades!" Trixie shouted. She ordered the Diamond Dog to pick up the statue and run toward the magical door at full speed while the rest followed behind. Discord's stony head acted a kind of magical battering ram, the sealed doors broke open to a small chest; their objective.

Trixie snatched it and prepared to wink a distance away from her castle. Hopefully even the nonactive Elements would give her an even bigger boost. "See you later, comrades!" she stated with a wave and her magic charged.

Swarms of guard pegasi and what appeared to be Princess Celestia could be seen whipping by the windows as Gilda turned to Trixie, "Wait, what? Aren't you taking us with you?"

"Revolution requires sacrifice, comrades! Your sacrifice!" she replied, and with a bright flash she was gone, her accomplices abandoned to their fates.

---

Trixie's friends from the college were in a state of relative panic at the factory. Trixie had been gone for days; there's no way she could have been successful in her little scheme and taken so long. There was also no way they could ever return to Canterlot; they were known associates of a terrorist now.

System Smasher had begun a long rant about states crushing everything when he was blown against the wall by an explosion of teleportation magic. Trixie emerged from the white light, holding a small orate chest and a giant grin on her face.

"Comrades," she said as she opened the chest to reveal the Elements inside, "The revolution is now."