Flanking Maneuvers

by Mandroid


Cuckolds.

You and Celly sat on the beach together. In the sun. At high noon. In SUMMER.
"If I've told you once, I've told you a hundred billion times, I HATE THE SUN." you say.
Celly turns your way and pouts. "How can you be so cruel, dear?"
"Eat shit, you know what I mean."
Celly tuts and goes back to watching the ocean. "Well I absolutely ADORE it here! This place never fails to make me feel like a million bits!" she says as she stretches her wings out and lays down.
You sit and stew for a bit. "I can literally FEEL my skin burning."
You were going to be so peely...
"Dear, you bed the sun goddess of an entire planet, you should be used to a bit of sunburn~."
"You can control yourself, tell your stellar body to leave me the hell alone."
Celly rolls over onto her back. "Sorry dear! If I give you special treatment, then everyone will be expecting it!"
You get off the towel next to her and brush yourself off. "I put up with you, I deserve it. I'm hitting the ice cream dude, you want anything?"
"Banana please, dear." she says.
You wordlessly leave and make your way in the direction of the ice cream dude. At least this was some fancy couples retreat private beach thing, NOTHING sucked worse than beach crowds.
You find the ice cream stand.
"Vanilla and a banana, please."
The pony inside turns to and his eyes grow wide at the sight. Come on, you've been here ages by now and you were a fairly public figure.
"Ah, hello sir. I've been expecting you." he says.
"Does word of my sweet tooth travel that far?"
He flashes a toothy grin. "No, but we've been watching you for months."
Something pricks you on the back of your neck and you pass out.
-Theme Song-

You woke up in some green goo.
OH GOD SHE GOT THE JELL-O OUT AGAIN!
You silently scream inside your goo-prison and learn that you are not, in fact, in Jell-o. Jell-o didn't taste like piss and eggs.
You reach your hand out and brush up against a soft barrier. You apply some pressure and are able to poke a hole. The hole widens as you force your hand through it until you are spilling out onto the ground below.
You spat the foul tasting liquid out. "HELP! HELP! I'VE BEEN SLIMED!"
You wipe the goo of your eyes and get top your feet, only to find someone standing eye to eye with you. She was about Celly's height, with some SERIOUS hair grease problems and black chitinous skin. Along with green eyes that were staring VERY intently at you.
"I'VE BEEN SLIMED BY THE BLACK SLUTTY QUEEN OF THE COCKROACHES!"
"Chrysalis" as you knew her from the royal wedding huffs. "I see the crown Prince's tongue is as sharp as always."
"Not as sharp as yours is, snake-y."
You brush the last of the slime off you and compose yourself.
"Any reason you kidnapped me? I thought I left you gob smacked the last time we tangoed."
Those green eyes gain a spark of mischief. "I have been watching all those who were responsible for throwing me out of Canterlot for some time now."
Meaning Luna was perfectly safe.
"I must say you...interested me at the wedding, your highness. And seeing you and Princess Celestia together has made me yearn for a partner that I don't devour after copulating."
Okay...gross.
"I see how you and the Princess treat each other, your highness. I assure you I can make your life much more...pleasurable~" she says with a flit of her forked tongue.
She eats emotions and still gets it wrong. She also radiates fucking horny waves at all times, it seems. Time with Celly has prepared you well.
"A-huh...and how much of this is over sex?"
You swear you see fucking red come over those black cheeks of hers. "Hmmhmm~...I will admit that your reputation for..."noise" with Celestia was what drew me to you in the first place~."
First a sun goddess beds you and now a bug-queen is trying to.
Your scowl cannot grow any deeper.

Nope. You were wrong. It can totally go deeper. It can go deeper when this fucking bug queen decided to show her "Changeling King" around her hive.
This hellhole was terrible, you actually started to miss the sun. All you had was the glow of emerald crystals hanging all over the place. It had been like this for HOURS now.
"And here we have our spawning pools, these Changelings are in the final stages of incubation." Chrysalis says.
You look down at the bubbling green concoction as its glow filled the room.
"It smells like rancid shit."
Chrysalis glowers at you. "These pools represent the future of the entire hive, as the new King, you may wish to show your future subjects more respect!"
Another Changeling flies up and begins talking to Chrysalis, leave you alone to ponder.
You look down into the bubbling pools. You can see as little microbes swim about and collect in certain spots, forming the rudimentary shape of a Changeling. More drones flew in from further down the caverns and dumped more slime inside. You could make out a few pieces of food inside the goo, food which was immediately broken down by the little buggers inside.
Guess they need nutrients.
Hmm...Maybe you ought to give them some...
You look both ways and unzip your pants. The cavern is filled with the sound of water on water. Chrysalis' face goes to abstract horror as she turns her head.
"Your tour goes too long. I've been holding it."

You now sat at the Changeling version of "dinner". Meaning you were expected to eat a rat that had been scorched black and sit at a table that looks like it has been made of solidified spit. Changelings ate love, so you guess that means they didn't know how to cook a fucking meal.
Finally a chef worse than Celly.
You sat next to Chrysalis alone as you poked around your cooked crap.
"Are you not hungry, my king?" she asks.
"No. It's just a fucking rat who was cooked to carbonization."
You flick it off the table with your crappy fork.
"Come on, I get that none of you can taste real people food, but can you at LEAST kidnap someone who can?"
Chrysalis scowls again.
"Seriously, the fucking wedding food was better than this!"
You sweep the plate off the table.
"Do you not remember? You had to TASTE all of it."
The Royal Wedding happened a few months before you and Celly tied the knot. Chrys has broken in and tried to take over Canterlot, it was only through Anon and the girls getting the Elements that they didn't.
Chrysalis had put Celly in some cocoon way up high before the two of you spent the entire time before Anon got the Elements arguing.
It was like you were some magnet for bitchy immortal monarchs.
"Your time here will go much easier if you COOPORATE, Prince..." Chrysalis growls as she jams her face in yours.
Here's your fucking cooperation.
You reach your hands under the table and flip it, sending what was left of the shit-tacular meal into the air and crashing down onto the ground.
Chrysalis glowers at you as the Changeling guards rushed in and found the "dinner" thrown on the floor.
"I sneezed."

Some time later you were laying on a "bed" that Chrysalis had prepared for you both. All in all, it was a fairly decent recreation of the bed back home. Changelings don't seem to have any creative spark at all, it seemed.
Chrysalis came into the room and took one look at your grumpy exterior. "Were you this indignant when Celestia brought you into HER bed?"
"Yes."
Chrysalis grins. "Well then, I should have good odds."
She hops up on the bed and scoots over to you, purring as she rests a head on your shoulder.
"You're coming on awful strong for a woman who's not getting any."
Chrysalis rolls her eyes. "I don't see any ring on your hand."
The deepest scowl you've had in a while exploded onto your face. You didn't like talking about your wedding ring.
You mumble something.
Chrysalis brings her face closer. "What? What did you just say?"
"I said "That's because it's not a ring that goes on my finger..."
Chrys-a-swiss brings her face back, her eyes shifting between yours and your pants.
"Yeah."
All is silent for the briefest of moments. Then Chrysalis starts laughing.
"AHAHAHAHAHAHA! TO THINK THAT THE CROWN PRINCE SO TOUTED FOR HIS INDEPENDANCE IS FORCED TO WEAR A COCK-RING AS A WEDDING BAND!"
"AT LEAST I'M NOT SOME MUTANT WHO GOT BEATEN BY THE POWER OF LOVE!"
She wipes a tear from her eye. "W-wait until the people of Canterlot hear this!"
Dammit!
You raise your fist up and slam it down on the bed. "SHUT UP!"
You strike Chrysalis on her leg.
"OH~!"
wat.
Chrysalis shakes her head a bit. "Careful! Those holes are very sensitive!"
...She didn't just-She did.
She'll regret that?
"Oh re-he-he-heally~?"
You reach a hand down and start to circle a finger around one of the wider holes.
"No! Mous! don-!" The rest gets muffled as Chrysalis bites her bottom lip.
You slide off the bed as you massage her hole and grab a rock from the window.
"You know, you really shouldn't tell people your erogenous zones."
You pop the rock into the hole rather snuggly, sending Chrysalis into spazzing fits as she brushed up against its smooth surface.
"They're only going to use it against you."
You grab something else, a glowing crystal this time, and popped it into another hole. Chrysalis bucked and shook as you went around the room and placed as many objects as you could find in her cheese-legs.
In time, they were all filled.
"How you hangin' there, Chrys?"
A small "Mmmf!" came from her lips as she tried to stay very, VERY still.
Satisfied that you weren't getting molested tonight from someone who couldn't concentrate long enough to use her magic, you settled in on the floor, finding it surprisingly comfortable.
"Goodnight Chryssy~"
"Mmmmmmff!"

The next day you were stuck next to Chrysalis as she made some retarded speech in front of the spawning pools. "Soon, my minions! Soon we will catalyze this new breed of drones to bolster our ranks!"
She had been going on like this for hours now.
Apparently new Changelings were brought to the cusp of their development before something was fed into all the pools. That something was the catalyst that imprinted something on all the drones.
If they needed more fighters, it was a corpse. More workers, a rock. More scouts, an eye. Almost anything could be put into the pools and imprinted on a new batch of Changelings.
"Great. You made your speech. Can we go now?"
Chrysalis glares, none too happy about not being able to move at night. "We will be staying until the ceremony is complete, child."
Oh yeah, she was pissed.
Just needed one more...
Chrysalis starts talking again as you snuck off.
"And this! Our largest batch of Changelings ever! In time we will have the forces to march on Equestria once again!"
The amassed Changelings cheer.
"In your lifetimes, WE WILL TAKE CANTERLOT!"
They cheer again, louder this time.
"And I will throw Princess Celestia from her throne myse-"
Chrysalis is interrupted by a loud "plop!" from behind her.
All the Changelings present turn to look to you, bare assed and hovering over the prime spawning pool.
"...What? This is what you get for having a long-ass fuckin' rally."

You were back in Canterlot now, a pair of Changelings dropping you unceremoniously on Celestia's balcony.
"Yeah, well fuck you too!" you shout as they fly away.
You rub your sore butt, walk into your nice comfortable room again and collapse on the bed. Celly just so happened to pick that exact moment to walk in through the door eating a banana.
"Dear?"
"Hey. Nice of you to send a rescue party." you say through the pillow on your face.
"Rescue party?" she asks arching an eyebrow.
"Yeah you bitch, I got kidnapped by fucking Changelings and was almost forced to be their goddamn king."
Celly slowly nods. "Ah yes...you never came back from ice cream..."
"And YOU never noticed I was gone, brilliant."
Celly walks around and sits down on the edge of the bed.
"...So, enjoy the vacation?"
A grin parted your wife's lips. "Did you know that they film Marewatch there?"
You roll your eyes. "Gross, now there's literally sand in your vagina."
She leans back and falls next to you. "You know I only get pleasure from you, dear~."
You sigh and reach an arm out to scratch her behind the ears, eliciting a small purr from her. "How did you get back here?" she coos.
"They kicked me out."
"Oh?"
"Did you know that Changelings are made from a base genetic code? And that pooping in the pool that has that is bad?"
Celly chuckles. "You didn't..."
"Ruined the whole batch...Chryssy probably wanted to kill me but she just kept screaming "OUT OUT OUT!" in that flanged voice of hers."
Celly rolls over and threw a hoof across you. "So you escaped your kidnappers by simply being annoying."
"Pretty much."
"Well, it's good to see that our hostage plan works."
"Just as planned, Celly."