//------------------------------// // Forests and goblins // Story: The Psychopath Interviews // by The Psychopath //------------------------------// (The characters here belong to Hydra) The deep green of the tranquil forest enamored many who would see it, sometimes considering the flora as a great canvas of nature. As the stallion continued through his path, bushes would shake. As his house came into view The grey stallion pondered the vision he’d had while visiting Ponyville. “Why can’t the elements leave me be during such great days.” he said, sighing as he took in the sights and sounds around him. Out of nowhere, a bell sounded. Not a typical bell, but the ones usually found on small bikes, and the source of this bell came out from the very low, leaf covered branches of the Everfree trees. It was a large bush on a tricycle. It stopped in its path as the stallion stared at it, while the bush seemed to stare back. “What in the hay?! Maybe I’m becoming delusional again.” He said, trying to avoid looking at the strange bush. With the sound of ruffling leaves, the plant just said:”I’m just a bush on a tricycle.” before ringing its bell and disappearing back into the forest. “Now I know I’m going crazy” “Not at all.” said a familiar voice next to the stallion. “Thinking I could get a single day of rest. What do you want?” the stallion said expecting the technicolor pony from his vision. However, next to this stallion, there was just a monkey holding something behind its back. With a stunned expression on his face, the stallion knelt for a better look at the small monkey. Squishing the concealed moss pie in his face, it hopped around with its arms waving in the air before swinging away into the forest. Wiping his face, the stallion gave chase, jumping over fallen logs and dodging the occasional rogue branch. Finally losing sight of the monkey he stopped in a clearing, closing his eyes the world took on another form as he felt for the monkey’s presence. Finding nothing the stallion opened his eyes and jumped back when two swirly eyes suddenly appeared two millimeters from his own and yelled:”Herro!” “So you decided to show yourself finally.” taking a defensive stance he prepared for the worst. Since seeing his first vision, most of them had been about dangerous events and this could be another. The swirling eyes melted to the ground and reformed into the pony from his vision. “I don’t shupposh you have shomething to drink?” the stallion forced out of his dried up mouth. “Not on me but a creek is nearby if you need it so badly.” the grey stallion said, his suspicion rising. “Okay!” he shouted. The technicolor stallion slammed his hoofs into the ground and looked like he was digging. In reality, he was pulling the stream towards himself with a smile, and drank from the water of that portion pulled to him. As he wiped his mouth, he asked the stallion, while grabbing his foreleg and throwing him up and down:” What’s yer name?” “The name’s Paradox. How about telling me yours.” hearing it come from the side he turned to see Paradox standing a few feet to the side. Looking back at his hooves the fake stallion slowly dispersed into glowing blue symbols. “I am Psycho, also known as ‘The Psychopath’.” the stallion jittered quite a lot as his smile remained stationary upon his face. “So why are you here in the Everfree forest? A vision told me of your approach but it makes me wonder why?” staying on his guard, he was growing curious about the other pony’s background. Psycho simply stood upright on his hind legs, took on an unimpressed and bored expression, pushed something that ringed, leaned against the air and began to slowly levitate upwards. He got out of whatever he made and began to walk on the air with a large smile. “I just like to go around and ask ponies things, like if you have a family.” “Well yes and no, I was created by the Elements of Harmony. Some of my extended family, I guess, would be the bearers of the elements and my partner, Lupus.” he answered, surprised that he’d answered the indirect question so quickly. “Mmmyes, very much so.” Psycho was stroking some newly formed beard as he smoked from a pipe. “Quite the strange dimension I must sayyyyy.” he had a haughty tone of voice.”Care to,mmm, elaborate on how you were made?” “I have little memory of how I was created. I only found out after Celestia and Twilight’s dad discovered my connection to the elements. About Lupus though... I had found him near my house, near death from being abandoned due to his sickliness. Doing much better after getting a mark of Ehwaz. It allows me to communicate with him. Wasn’t until recently that he became Alpha of his old pack...would you like some help down?” Psycho was facing a tree high in the air. He stuck out his tongue in concentration, pulled his foreleg back, then punched the tree yelling :”Kugi punch!”. The tree burst into pieces. “Haha! This is fun!” he said as he jumped back down to the floor like a tree leaf.”The Illogic doesn’t need help. It helps others.” Psycho smiled. Finally deciding that there was little to worry about, Paradox strolled over to the smashed trunk and placed a forehoof on it. As a glowing blue horn appeared on his forehead, a new tree began to sprout from the broken remnants. “Try not to destroy everything here Psycho, please.” Psycho peeked over his shoulder and gave an innocent smile as he turned back around and threw an empty vial into his hat. The land behind him was completely scorched. Gritting his teeth, Paradox forced a hoof into the ground. As the horn appeared again the surrounding forest withered as his mane and tail took on the appearance of various foliage. Finally pulling his hoof from the ground none of the flora around the two ponies remained. “Maybe this will help? It’ll take some work but I’ll fix this mess later. Kinda makes me wonder what you had in that vial to cause such large devastation.” he said, eyeing the other pony’s hat “Any backstory to your life besides the...piece of alpha peach?” “Alpha peach? Not sure what you mean by that. Most of my life has been spent here in the Everfree forest. After Celestia deemed me safe, I had left the Canterlot castle to prepare for the upcoming war I had envisioned. Needing a quiet place I chose the forest because of the calm. Eventually I met up with the Twilight and her friends when they searched for the elements. Since then I’ve been training them and helping where I can... Oh there also was that thing with Luna.” he said, remembering how nightmare night had turned out. Apart from the strange behaviour, Paradox was starting to enjoy this conversation with Psycho. “Yes. Now, what do you see in this picture?” Psycho held out a piece of white cardboard with an ink stain on it. He was sitting on a red chair while Paradox suddenly found himself on a chaise lounge of a beige color. Deciding to play along, Paradox glanced at the inkstain trying to make sense of it. “Times up!” Psycho shouted before hitting the cardboard. The ink stain flew off the cardboard and landed on Paradox’s face and making him temporarily blind. “Aahhh, it burns! What is this ink made of!” Trying to get the ink out of his eyes, Paradox fell out of his seat and tried to sense the water Psycho had brought forth earlier. “What was I thinking?” Psycho walked around as he tapped his chin while Paradox continued to scream in agony.”What powers do you have if you were made from this world’s elements of harmony?” Finally finding the water Paradox dunked his head into it, opening his eyes to clear out the ink. When the pain finally became bearable he turned to Psycho before answering through gritted teeth,”How about I show you.” As the glowing blue horn appeared so did a pair of translucent red wings. “Impressive... What are your powers aga...” Psycho’s response was cut short as he disappeared, narrowly avoiding a hoof to the muzzle. “Just the Illogic.” Psycho said from behind Paradox’s eye.”It’s quite empty in here.” “Bad Idea Psycho.” Paradox said as a blue glow surrounded his body. His hair slowly changed from floral designs to a similar color as Psycho’s hat. At the same time a crazed smile crept onto his face. Reappearing in front of Paradox, Psycho’s hat seemed faded. “Now why is it such a bad idea pally.” Psycho lifted his hoof and somehow made the noise of snapping fingers. “I believe you trying to steal my hat, which caused me to take control of you. None control my hat. My hat is my hat that I hat. Let us riverdance!” Psycho and Paradox began to riverdance. seconds later Psycho’s hooves turned to lead making him fall forward. With a laugh Paradox fell on his back. “You should see the look on your face... taking control, not likely,I simply absorbed some of your power. Sorry for trying to hit you before, I can see how funny that prank was.” he said between breaths, as his laughter subsided. Psycho was laughing right next to Paradox.”I know, right? Besides, why’d you attack a monkey?” he said with a frown. “He made me go bananas.” Paradox replied “Here’s one other to go to. Squish!” Psycho picked a banana from his hat and squished it against the other stallion’s face. Wiping the banana off his face, he grabbed a creampie from his mane. “I ain’t the one creamed at least.” he said before squishing it in Psycho’s face. Both of the stallions proceeded to bring out bigger and bigger pies before Paradox was stuck under a pie labelled ‘Fat Albert’. Taking a spotlight out of his hat, Psycho jaw line became square. “Spill the beans. We know you’re hiding secrets from us. What powers are you hiding?” Sticking his head out of the center of the pie plate, Paradox jumped out of the pie completely clean. Taking on a foreign appearance he pretended to cringe under Psycho’s gaze. “Alright I’ll talk. I can use magicz, fly uzing myne wings and I can takez the powers of otherz by using age and energy absorption or repulsion. I also can control my density.” Paradox said in a bad foreign accent, as ‘Fat Albert’ was crushed by his growing weight. Ironically however, Psycho began to float away from the stallion that brought about much Illogic. Psycho was quite happy. “Illogic might just need somepony like you. Well, I’ll be leaving now. EXCELSIOR!”he yelled as a flock of tiny salamanders came from the air on boats and took him away. As the Psychopath flew away on his salamander driven boats, Paradox’s mane reverted back to the color of foliage and he started to think normally again. ”Guess it’s time to clean up this mess.” Planting a hoof in the ground, the pent up magic was released ,which quickly revitalized the surrounding flora back to normal. The sounds of oars splashing came back, and from the sky, the salamanders and Psycho on the boat were all holding tiny vials filled with a red liquid. “Bob-ombs away!” Psycho yelled. The vials each fell randomly in the forest, but the area around Paradox was the most affected. Everything was black, scorched, and smoking. The boats left with Psycho holding up a marshmallow on a stick. “PSYCHOOOOO!” Paradox yelled after the cackling stallion.