//------------------------------// // Wonder Wings pt. 2 // Story: The Dreaded Love Bird // by Darkonshadows //------------------------------// “You know what Kazooie.” Rainbow said from her spot a few hooves behind Kazooie. “What?” Looking up at the shells hovering above her head, she slowy turned to Rainbow also looking at the two shells revolving around in a circle slowly above her head. “Can you show me how you did that thing with your wings?” Looking at Rainbow with an intriguingly raised brow, Kazooie smiled. “Sure, but you do realize you could accidentally lose your wings if you…” Kazooie started to say. “Not that… I was talking about that thing where you wings created a golden glow around you for a few seconds and deflected those turtle shell things you let loose upon us… unless that’s the same thing.” Rainbow really like the idea of getting her wings to do something that awesome, it looked really cool and she only hoped she didn’t get that strange banjo music that started playing when Kazooie did it. “No it’s different from P-Wing Power, that was my Wonder Wing ability and we‘ll see about it after the competition… don’t contact me I’ll contact you. Also that ability works better when protecting someone you love or care for… especially someone you love.” Turning back to the racers Kazooie saw Mare-Do-Well in the lead and avoiding the one shell with some difficult, she missed Rainbow giving her a slight frown at what she had said. “Well since my wings are slightly out of order it’s time to pull some earth pony magic out of my flank.” After standing there for a moment Rainbow thought Kazooie wasn’t going to do anything until her eyes opened up and she hopped slightly and stomped her four hooves to the ground, before stopping and looking behind her. “Well?” Rainbow said stretching out her wings, hitting the ground hurt somewhat but any winged pony worth their salt lick will handle a decent fall from the heights they would normally fly at. “I’m waiting for the competition before I start flying; my wings are on cool down from the P-Wing Power abuse. Otherwise I can still use them to Wonder Wing and finish the race already. I just think it’s unfair that I have an invincibility power involving the use of my wings when the other ponies can’t knowingly use it, the speed boost thing is simple enough even if it is performed differently between us so it’s much more fair if a bit instinctive. I’m surprised that bug thing is still holding on quite well. Enough talk here they come.” Kazooie then stomped her front two hooves and was suddenly airborne on a piece of rock shaped like a surfboard and flying off. This was just as Mare-Do-Well started her fifth lap followed by Bugsy, Turbulence, Shadow Wing and Surprise. The entire pack ponies behind them were average in speed and were waiting for the last lap to really put their all into it, Rainbow waited till at least Turbulence passed by before taking off as she didn’t want to be knocked back down to the ground by the two shells floating a lazy circle above her head. Kazooie was riding her flying stone surfboard quite well, having learned a thing or two about the geomancy earth ponies can perform. Combine with a floating platform to jump from she was performing sideways flips, backwards leaps and barrel rolls to deflect the annoying blues shells, they were a lot more effective against a grounded opponent and one that was driving a go kart at that. Hitting the stone board with two legs she from a landing she fell to her back and a shell zipped straight above her nose, looking up she could see one coming up on the tail of her board. With a slap of her right hoof a part of her board separated and blew up the shell behind her. What followed was the third shell slamming into the stone board from below sending her into the air flipping, after a moment she was performing rapid somersaults and after being hit by the other two shells she just kept going as a green glow encompassed her yo-yoing form. “Screw Attack, don’t fail me now.” Kazooie muttered as she continued to bounce forward at a slower pace that was allowing the other races to quickly catch up. At least being constantly shelled wasn’t slowing her down any as she was creating a protective green shield of imminent death around herself. After another three shells slammed into her the rotational power of her screw attack slowed down so much that it functionally failed to continue and her wings flared out so she could continue flying normally. Looking behind herself she smiled when she saw Rainbow was picking up steam back in the air and in third. As she flew she had to go back to dodging three shells and in the final stretch she turned her head slightly and said three words with a message attached to them. “Zul-mey-gut.” A certain pegasus in the race nodded and sped up as much as they could. Mare-Do-Well having heard the signal as well performed a corkscrew maneuver and sped up, getting ready to pull off the most convoluted plan ever. Mare-Do-Well however wouldn’t be passing the finish line first, no she was going to distract Rainbow Dash and make sure nobody could take second besides Kazooie. There were only three ponies in on this plan and it succeeded. “Shadow Wing get’s first place, followed by Kazooie and we have Rainbow in third… wow what an amazing race folks even the changeling has come in fourth and Mare-Do-Well in fifth, Turbulence, Surprise…” Spitfire was polite enough to say every pony’s name that entered as they passed the finish line and the shells had stopped being fired by the cannon. Speaking of which, Kazooie simply walked up to the cannon and smirked as she folded it up and put it away into her backpack. “I have to hoof it to you Kazooie you made that more interesting and you pulled some pretty wicked tricks out there. Are you sure you didn’t use any Alicorn or Unicorn magic out there?” “Nope, I only used personal ability, pegasus and possibly dragon magic. So even if first place doesn’t become a Wonderbolt, do they still get a medal?” Spitfire looked questioningly at Kazooie wondering what she was getting at, but she simply nodded. “So what’s the next event?” “Synchronized flying, you need to get together four other ponies in the competition to agree to fly with you… shouldn’t be hard for a princess and you have an hour and thirty minutes to get creative and make your own routine. Anyway…why did you let Shadow Wing get first place anyway?” Spitfire saw something of an evil smirk hiding behind a simple smile and those green eyes. “Sometimes losing is the way to victory. Also like you said, I doubt I’ll have problems getting a team together. All the ponies seem to be looking at me to form a team with them if the stares are anything to go by.” Kazooie said this without trying to even hint that she had managed to accomplish a ploy and Mare-Do-Well had performed flawlessly at the end to get Rainbow to not focus on first or second place. She chuckled to herself as she trotted over to the rest of the competitors and let out a loud whistle. “Okay, I want Bugsy since no other pony will probably want you, Mare-Do-Well if you trust me well enough already to not endanger you further and I’ll owe you one, Shadow Wing because you have a good heart and Surp…” “Me.” Rainbow said clearly interrupting Kazooie while offering her services and stepping forward with her wings flared, all the other ponies cried out sadly wanting to fly with the new princess and started to swarm towards her until she gave them a glare putting them in their place. They went to form their own groups. “Well we will have to all agree on that you know… besides if I’m flying in a team I need a team that will want to fly with me. Bugsy as my first pick do you agree to fly with any of the ponies of the six here.” Looking to the big blue orbs turning to the other ponies the changeling’s eyes looked through them and he could taste love coming from one of them for some odd reason, but he thought it better to keep the fact that he was snacking to himself or else there’d be a riot and he wasn’t sure how far this princesses protection would go. Bugsy also felt warmth in his exoskeleton that Kazooie even chose him first. “Yes… is okay fly with right?” Bugsy said to the others, Mare-Do-Well nodded, Shadow Wing nodded, Surprised nodded and they all turned to Rainbow who begrudgingly nodded. “There can only be five ponies or changeling on this team. That and I have to tell one of these fine ponies to leave, are you sure?” Kazooie saw the determined look on Rainbow’s face as she nodded again. “Okay, sorry Surprise… I hope you’ll hold nothing against me.” “Of course not, but my cousin Pinkie might be a bit miffed that you’re planning to run from her as soon as this competition is over with… so I’m telling you ahead of time that I’m sorry we can’t talk at the after party after the Wonderbolts are done talking to ponies they pick for various reasons to have a chat with. Just so you know I’m going to help my cousin catch you, but you have today as a head start. I don’t like seeing my cousin fret over her first friend a lot of ponies thought was an imaginary being despite her obvious disappearance and story being the truth.” With a bright flash Surprise disappeared tutu and all startling the changeling and all the ponies except Kazooie who just yawned. “I bet nothing surprises that pony.” Kazooie said blandly, she turned to the other ponies and changeling still with her. “Okay, we need to come up with a routine. Before you say anything Rainbow, this is a team effort I already have ideas for my own routine and so do the rest of you probably except bug face who is quite frankly out of his depth with this sort of thing as he is not too much of a free thinker I’m thinking.” “Bugsy thinks… well enough… but will go with whatever is decided by other ponies… not intrude much me want.” Bugsy wings wilted, but Kazooie just patted him on the head like he was a dog. He nuzzled her hoof sadly receiving some pity love from her. “Anyway, I’m going to design a routine with each of our strengths in mind. Rainbow your pulling a speed routine, Shadow Wing you’ll be shadowing her and putting a bit of gracefulness into what she does, Mare-Do-Well your with Bugsy you two will be flying a slower rhythmic routine.” Kazooie took a moment to nod to herself, she also had a good idea and if she could find the pony fast enough she could get some good tunes going with it as well. “Oh and what will you be doing?” Rainbow asked taking a step forward and putting herself face to face with Kazooie. “As leader of the Wonder Wings, I will be trying to stay out of the spotlight since it will always follow me and will mostly help accentuate everyone else’s routines. I will help the fast or slow at random depending on which is getting better attention. Also we might need some music and I know just the pony that could help us with that. So we’re all set. Meet me back here in an hour and I’ll describe what I want you to do and we’ll get in some practice, Bugsy come with me I believe a princess wants to rant at me for a while.” Kazooie was followed by a suddenly squeamish changeling. “Don’t worry I won’t let them harm you, I’m not too horrible at escort missions.” “Wait, who went and made you leader!” Rainbow was getting uppity, she want to be the lead however a quick blast of fire from Kazooie’s mouth shut her up. “Got any complaints?” Kazooie said smiling sweetly; Rainbow quickly shook her head no. “See that’s why I’m the leader, it’s not because I’m a princess. It’s because I know what I’m doing. Now take five everyouhhh… pony, get a snack in while you’re at it.” Trotting away with Bugsy at her heels she saw ponies making their way towards her on the field. Two of which were familiar faces, Applejack and Pinkie in a tin can. One of them must have been the illustrious Twilight Sparkle and looking to her right she could see Celestia fly down with her sister Luna. This was going to get pretty bad and fast if she couldn’t hold back her insults. “Hey Wings that was awesome, terrific, you flew so fantastically… too bad you only got second and you were all like screwing through the air blowing the shells up with your rotational discharge and without power armor no less!” Pinkie’s enthusiasm hadn’t worn down as she clanked around in the armor she got herself stuck in as she hugged Kazooie slowly choking the life out of her. “Oh right, I’ve got to introduce you to all my friends!” “I’ve already met Applejack. So Pinkitty who are the other two I’ve only seen one of them for a few seconds in a semi teleportation accident. Also my screwing around without power armor is the reason why I couldn’t keep it up for too long.” Princess Celestia was annoyed that Kazooie was once again ignoring her as she approached and stood there watching. Taking a look at the suit, Kazooie trotted off and came back wearing her backpack. “So… need some help getting out of that tin can?” “Oh these two are Twilight and Rarity… do you have any idea what this suit is or any way to figure it out?” Pinkie asked suddenly interested to see if Kazooie could solve its magical secrets and finally get it off of herself. “If it’s alive I’ll know based on whether or not this scroll works or not. I’ve got plenty of spares from a rogue-like three dimensional jumps ago.” Kazooie dug a hoof into her backpack and rummaged around bit before pulling out a scroll. “Now could you all back away slightly please, this blank scroll will identify the problem.” “How can a blank scroll identify Pinkies problem.” As soon as Twilight opened her mouth Kazooie stared at her and then trotted slowly around her and tapped a spot on her back with a hoof and Twilight giggled. “Let’s see bookish, a pony who believes in logic which is quite contrary to being a magic user, very smart and very dumb at the same time. A bit antisocial… okay.” Kazooie turned to Pinkie and started a conversation Twilight will never understand. “She didn’t quite get the Pinkie Sense the first time did she? All I said when you told me about it was that it was nice that you had a working precognition ability which is useful for survival where I’m from sometimes.” “Nope, but you have to give her credit she did truthfully try to make sense of it.” Pinkie giggled as Kazooie started laughing. “Let me guess, comical injury involving safes?” Kazooie stated coolly after calming down while crossing her hooves in front of her chest. “Nope, just a flower pot, an anvil, a cart full of hay bales and a piano. You know, just the usual stuff.” Pinkie had a bright smile on her face. “Wish I could have been there for that, did she eventually drop the issue or did it finally take a safe hitting her to figure out to just leave well enough alone?” In all honesty Kazooie knew where this was going. “Nope it took a hydra though and finally she exploded into flames when she finally found out that my doozy was just her admitting that you just can’t understand how my Pinkie Sense works, she exploded into flames and looked like a Rapidash for a moment.” Smiling at Kazooie, Pinkie waited for Kazooie to say something smart about that tidbit. “Bet she's hot stuff and that she’s a cute above the rest when angry. Not to be obtuse or anything, but catching fire without the painful third degree burns is kind of an awesome trick.” It took a moment for Kazooie to realize she was being prompted; it also took a moment for Twilight to get the blush off her face. “Not one of your best ones, but I give it a pass. Of course she gets real awkward when she gets in a frump. Anyway can we get on with the scroll, helping me… like now?” Pinkie said well motioning to the fact that she was still stuck in the armor. Kazooie nodded to her and quickly opened the scroll and with a flash from the scroll she looked at it then gave it to Twilight before turning to look at Rarity. “Eh, you’re a piece of work and Pinkie says Twilight gets into mares. Keep trying and you’ll eventually find love… or it will find you. Don’t be afraid to aim low or have slightly lower standards. Also you are easily high strung and you fuss over yourself way too much, ease back on that and you’ll be more approachable.” That was all Kazooie had to say to Rarity before she turned to Celestia, as she did Rarity wandered off in a stupor to think about what Kazooie told her. “So what crawled up your flank and died a fiery death this time?” “When you stop being an Alicorn I will find a way to detain you.” Celestia said coldly while Twilight was off to the side busy with Pinkie. “As long as you are one I can’t touch you, but know this… I always get every trouble maker that comes into Equestria to disrupt the balance eventually.” “No, just the mischief makers who aren’t smart enough to outwit you, besides no force earthly or spiritual can hold me. If you want a war, then love is the battlefield and I will target something you love most aside from the whole country you’re running.” Kazooie turned around and leered at Twilight, causing Celestia to frown at the implication. “I don’t like what you are implying, she is my student and I’m like a second mother to her.” Celestia moved to Kazooie’s side and stared straight ahead. “You say that now… by the way I’ve got something for your sister if she’s interested.” Despite the sing song tone, Celestia couldn’t help but think Kazooie was about to do something horrible to her sister. “Pray thee, what might I be interested in.” At the moon princesses behest when she came up to them, Kazooie reached into her backpack and pulled out a plain brown paper wrapped package and just held it in front of Luna. “Take it if you want to be happy; don’t take it if you don’t like reliving your past. Oh and one last thing open it in private if you do take it, Celestia might not like what I’m giving you.” Luna just scanned the package with her magic and looked at Kazooie’s blank face; she slowly if hesitantly took the package in her magic and then left with haste. “It’s good to see she can relive her past and face it like a mare. See you solar butt, me and Bugsy here have to go get some munchies.” Celestia’s mind was pulled in three different ways of thought as Kazooie trotted off in an easy gait. One was telling her to keep watch of her student who was busy reading the scroll Kazooie left behind, another was telling her to not lose sight of Kazooie and the last was to follow after her sister to make sure tragedy didn’t strike twice… what if it was her sister she loved as much as her country then Kazooie might have just given something harmful to her sister. The princess of the sun just sat down, she wasn’t dealing with Discord or Nightmare Moon. Those two were prophesized as much as the changeling queen or the crystal kingdom in a few weeks time. Kazooie was a being that could divert attention in as many directions as needed to avoid any plan falling apart; she was even befriending a changeling and what was more horrifying to Celestia was that there was nothing about Kazooie in any prophecy at all. Even wild mass guessing about how the changeling thing would have turned out was what led to victory as she figured the elements would solve it, not the love of two ponies. Then again some of the thousand year prophecies were still quite vague. “Wow so that’s how this armor works, you’ll be out of it in no time Pinkie we just got figure out how to settle the requirements for taking it off.” Hearing the voice of her student Celestia could only hope that Kazooie didn’t mean any harm to her kingdoms subjects or her sister, she moved over to her student and looked down at the scroll. It had the name of the armor at the top, diagrams and a lot of writing devoted to what the armor can do. “Of course I’ll be out of it in no time Twilight; Kazooie has scrolls that can identify any object and tell you what it does. If the armor was alive, then it wouldn’t have worked and then we’d get it off in another way!” Pinkie looked up at Celestia and smiled seeing that the princess was worried about her video game friend. “Don’t be so worried princess, if Kazooie accidentally kills anypony she’ll just bring them back to life. She’ll even bring back any ponies if they die in an accident and she’s aware of it or directly involved, she’s really nice once you get to know her.” If the previous scene wasn’t reason enough for Celestia to worry about Kazooie, she just learned that the annoying creature was a necromancer as well!