//------------------------------// // Chapter 6 // Story: Light Wanderings // by ed2481 //------------------------------// Edited by TacoTown and Furta E Chapter six Ethan flashed back into existence in the middle of Celestia’s bedroom, along with Celestia and Twilight, who still lay unconscious across Celestia’s back. “Are you alright Ethan?” Celestia asked as she quickly ran her violet eyes over the man. He had several deep gashes running across his chest, and they were bleeding profusely, staining the carpet of Celestia’s room. She sighed; it was almost time to get them cleaned again anyways… “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” Ethan asked in confusion. “I suppose that the slash marks running across your chest would be a good reason.” Celestia replied dryly. Ethan looked down at his chest and poked a finger into his chest’s geography. “Oh right, I forgot about that.” Ethan said with a chuckle as he reached into his pocket and withdrew a syringe. He stabbed the needle into his chest without hesitation and pulled the plunger. Then with casual ease he withdrew the syringe and pocketed it. “That should help things. It’s weird my body automatically heals all life threatening injuries, such as broken bones and organs, within a few seconds. But little things like this it heal at a much slower pace.” Ethan said with a shrug as he absently poked at the flesh that was quickly covering the gashes. “Of course, that’s what I have stimpacks for.” He added with a grin. Celestia looked at the man who was standing in front of her with barely contained shock. Twilight apparently hadn’t been exaggerating when she said that Ethan was hard to kill. He was currently shrugging off wounds that would kill the average pony in a matter of minutes if left unattended as they had been in Ethan’s case. “I don’t know what I’m going to do about my armor though, this stuff is practically priceless back in the Wasteland and I can’t imagine that you have any bullet proof riot gear here in Equestria do you?” Ethan asked Celestia as he looked down at his shredded clothing in dismay. “No, I don’t believe that we have that here.” Celestia said as she raised an eyebrow at Ethan. “Gah, this was my only change of clothes and I can’t go walking around with a hole in my shirt; that just wouldn’t fit my personality. I suppose that I could go naked, this is a nudist society after all…” Ethan said, trailing off as the idea struck him. “Perhaps that wouldn’t be the best idea. In fact, I have had a better one. Why don’t you ask Rarity to make you an outfit? She’s an exceptional designer and I’m sure that she could make an outfit worthy of an adventurer such as yourself.” Celestia suggested quickly. Twilight had informed her about Ethan’s ‘prestigious’ member, and she didn’t think that the palace staff could handle it. Luna added another layer to that particular equation that Celestia didn’t particularly feel like dealing with at the moment. “Now there’s an idea. What time is it anyways?” Ethan asked. “A little after eight. I’m sure that she’ll still be awake.” Celestia told Ethan, who nodded to himself and looked at his pipboy; it had suddenly gained a new waypoint. “Thanks Ma’am. By the way, is Sparky going to be okay?” Ethan asked, looking at Twilight who Celestia had transferred to the bed while they were talking. “She’ll be fine; I just thought it best to temporarily knock her out before she tore down the bar.” Celestia told Ethan with a shrug. “Great. By the way, I’ve changed my mind. I’d like to get some sleep before I do anything else, do you have a spare room where I can stay?” Ethan asked. “Ethan, this is a palace.” Celestia said flatly. “So that’s a yes, right?” Ethan asked with a chuckle. “I’ll put you in the Garden Suite; it’s a room that overlooks the palace gardens and it should be big enough for you. I’ve also asked for one of the alicorn sized beds to be put in it so that you’ll be comfortable.” Celestia answered. “Thanks. I can find my way there by myself if you want to stay with Sparky.” Ethan replied with a grin as a new waypoint appeared on his pipboy. “I don’t know if I should let you go alone, your behavior tonight didn’t quite manage to instill me with confidence in you, even with a guard.” Celestia told him, narrowing her eyes slightly. “I didn’t do anything that bad!” Ethan protested. “In my limited time to observe the building it looked as if you had reduced every piece of furniture to twigs, incapacitated several dozen ponies, and if I’m not mistaken I also saw three hippogriffs on the ground as well. I’m beginning to think that Twilight was wrong to invite you here.” Celestia told him harshly. “I’m getting the distinct impression that you don’t like me.” Ethan replied. “You punched my nephew in the face.” Celestia told Ethan flatly. “He insulted my parents, he’s lucky I only punched him.” Ethan growled. “It was a slight, nothing more. Certainly no reason to violate his honor in such a way.” Celestia told Ethan. “No one. Talks badly. About my parents.” Ethan told her evenly as he stared into her violet eyes. “It is a common enough insult, why did you react so badly to it?” Celestia asked changing subjects slightly. “Because my mother and father were scientists who died fighting for what they believed in, and both of their deaths were my fault.” Ethan told her with a small sigh as he turned his gaze back to the ground. “What happened?” Celestia asked, softening her tone. “My mother died in childbirth, and my father was murdered right in front of me.” Ethan replied with a frown. “I’m sorry to hear that Ethan, but that doesn’t give you the right to go around punching nobility in the face.” Celestia told him. “Ma’am, with all due respect nobility is worthless. If you’re in charge of something as important and large as a country then you damned well better be capable of defending yourself. If not, then you’ll be kicked off of your throne the second that someone stronger comes along.” Ethan replied with a scowl. “That isn’t how things work here in Equestria.” Celestia said. “Oh really now, it isn’t?” Ethan asked as his hands suddenly darted towards the knife at his waist. With a single move he had the long, blue bladed bowie knife in the air, aiming straight towards Celestia’s right eye. The blade was stopped several centimeters in front of the eye in a golden magical aura. Celestia regarded him with hard violet eyes as her mane began to swirl around her angrily. “That. Was. A. Mistake.” Celestia told him before she grabbed Ethan in a powerful golden aura, holding him completely immobile in front of her. “If you were not a guest then I would throw you off of the mountain; do not tempt me again.” Celestia said as she stared into Ethan’s intense blue eyed gaze. She released him from her magical field and Ethan landed on his feet. “So the strongest don’t rule here?” Ethan asked with a chuckle as he retrieved his knife from where it had fallen on the floor. Celestia rounded on him. “Let me be very clear about this Ethan. I love my little ponies. I love them so much that it hurts sometimes; and if you cause a war… Well let’s just say that it would be a very good idea for you to find somewhere very dark to hide.” Celestia told the man in front of her. “With all due respect Ma’am, you can kiss my ass.” Ethan replied before swiveling on his heel and walking out of the room, leaving Celestia scowling after him. Once the man was gone Celestia lay down on the bed with a long sigh. She hadn’t been that angry in years; hell, she hadn’t been that angry in centuries… What was going on? This wasn’t like her at all, what had she been thinking? Celestia shook her head to clear it. There was something going on here and she didn’t like it, not at all. Ethan walked casually down the corridors of the palace and arrived in his new suite without incident. He looked out at the garden below him, and thought that he saw a flash of light somewhere among the greenery. Then a wave of exhaustion hit him and he stumbled over to the bed before he fell into it with a contented smile on his face; it had been a good day. *** The next morning Ethan awoke in his suite with a minor headache, but it passed quickly thanks to his time spent as a partyboy. He didn’t particularly think that Celestia, or Twilight for that matter, would want to see him after last night so instead he pulled on his ruined duster and walked out onto the balcony overlooking the garden. It was a peaceful, green looking place and Ethan felt like taking a little time to relax, so he did what any right minded individual would do. He jumped. *** Princess Cadence sat under a tree, watching her son play among a nearby patch of flowers. He was an adventurous little unicorn with a blue mane flecked with spots of pink and a white coat. His name was Shining Star and he was already the darling of the entire castle. “Hey mama, what’s that?” The colt asked in an adorably cute voice as he pointed in the air. Cadence followed his hoof until she spotted what he was pointing at. “Oh, that’s just Ethan falling toward- Oh that isn’t good!” Cadence shouted as she grabbed Star in her pink magic and pulled him close to her. Half a second later Ethan impacted on the ground a few feet in front of them, sending dirt and grass flying in several directions; there was also the sickly sound of breaking legs. “I may have misjudged the height of that balcony.” Ethan said with a groan as his legs began to heal. “Lovely weather we’re having, isn’t it.” Cadence asked dryly as she walked towards Ethan with Star sitting on her back. “Although I don’t remember the pegasi mentioning that it was going to be raining men…” “The weather is hard to predict like that sometimes.” Ethan replied with a small chuckle as he massaged his legs where they’d healed. “Mama, who’s that?” Star asked from Cadence’s back, catching Ethan’s attention for the first time. “Ethan Smith, aka The Lone Wanderer, at your service kid.” Ethan said, giving the colt a goofy grin and a little bow. “You’re funny.” The colt giggled. “Thanks kid. You’re not too bad yourself.” Ethan replied with a smile. “So I heard from Ambassador Sharp that you got into a fight with several of his employees last night.” Cadence told Ethan. “Yeah, and those bas-” Ethan began until he saw Cadence’s frown and changed his words “Yeah, and those base born blighters ruined my armor.” He finished with an unhappy frown down at his torn armor. “Well, I think you’ll be happy to know that they were already reprimanded severely for their behavior. Hippogriffs aren’t supposed to get drunk outside of their kingdom, but apparently those three had been drinking for several hours before they came to your tavern. Ambassador Sharp sends his ‘dearest apologies for the awful breach in your honor’ that his men caused you and he promises to ‘repay any hardships that were bestowed upon you by the reckless talons’ of his people.” Cadence told him. “So he’ll pay me for my replacement stuff?” Ethan asked. “Yes. Now onto more pressing matters such as what kind of idiot jumps off of a perfectly good balcony.” Cadence said narrowing her eyes. “But mama, you’re not supposed to say the ‘I’ word.” Star protested from Cadence’s back. “He’s right you know. Those kinds of words are very hurtful.” Ethan added as a smirk crossed his face and he winked at the colt who smiled, oblivious to his mother’s irritated frown. “The point is Ethan, that you almost crushed my son.” Cadence said, nodding towards the colt on her back. A pained look crossed Ethan’s face. “I did…” He said, shock in his eyes as he swept over to Star, making sure that the colt was unharmed. “Yes, you did.” Cadence told him harshly, causing Ethan to flinch slightly at the words. Cadence was shocked. According to Twilight, Ethan was fairly carefree about most things involving death, but apparently the thought of hurting her colt hurt him. “I’m just saying that you need to look before you leap.” Cadence added gently. “I, I’m sorry. I just didn’t think that there would be anyone down here.” Ethan said haltingly. “It’s fine, no harm done. Just think about those beneath you next time you want to jump off of something tall.” Cadence said, giving the man a smile, watching the worry drain away from Ethan’s face. “Thank you, I’ll remember that.” Ethan replied with a smile and a nod. “Now if you’ll both excuse me I need to put some distance between myself and the palace. I think I may have made Sparky mad at me, and I don’t want to be around when she wakes up…” Ethan said before he trailed off. “Who’s Sparky?” Star asked. “Your father’s sister.” Ethan replied. “Oh, you mean the purple unicorn who uses big words that make mommy frown.” Star said. “Yep, that’s Sparky; make sure that you call her that from now on.” Ethan told the colt with a grin. “Now, like I said. I’ve got to go, but it was awesome meeting you little guy.” Ethan told Star. He gave Cadence a nod and a wave to Star before he set off towards the denser part of the garden. Ethan walked along one of the garden paths aimlessly for around an hour, until he was stopped by an unexpected voice that seemed to be talking to itself. “Don’t go near the human, don’t approach the human, bah. I’m Discord, I shouldn’t listen to Tia when she’s in a tizzy, the poor mare barely knows what time of day it is.” The voice said grumpily. “After all, it isn’t as if I’d do anything to him, I just want to meet the man, he sounds interesting and very, very chaotic.” The voice continued. “Just my type of guy really, Tia is so boring…” Ethan walked through a group of trees and found himself standing in front of a large waterfall. Standing in front of said waterfall was the oddest creature that Ethan had ever seen. “Well now I can officially say that I’ve seen fucking everything.” Ethan said with a chuckle; the creature rounded on him and Ethan couldn’t help himself. He burst into laughter at the shear impossibility of the creature. “Would you quit that? It’s hard enough to keep up your dignity after being turned to stone without being laughed at by a hairless ape.” Discord told Ethan in an annoyed tone. “Oh, I’m sorry. Am I offending you?” Ethan asked with a smirk. “Not really, it’s just that if someone going to be laughing at someone I prefer to be the one doing the laughing.” Discord replied with a smirk. “Oh, so you’re a bully.” Ethan said with a dangerous smile as he lightly fingered A Light Shining In the Darkness at his side. “I’m a god.” Discord replied flatly. “And I don’t like bullies.” Ethan told him, drawing his pistol and firing a shot at Discord’s forehead. The bullet passed right through and slammed into the rocks behind the waterfall, burying itself deep. “You done?” Discord asked as he tapped a long clawed finger in a bored fashion against his other arm. “Meh, I could continue, but I have the oddest feeling that it wouldn’t do anything.” Ethan said with a shrug. “Bravo. You sir, must be a genius.” Discord told him slowly, clapping his hands together. “Thank you, you’re very kind.” Ethan said with a smile. “Discord.” Discord said, offering his intangible hand to Ethan. “Ethan.” Ethan replied, but withholding his hand. “Sorry, but I don’t shake hands with incorporeal entities. In my experience it gives them access to your brain, which is something that I really don’t have time for.” Ethan told Discord, who withdrew his hand with a slightly annoyed look on his face. “Well now that introductions are over I suppose you want to talk to me about something bothering you, don’t you?” Discord asked as his voice literally dripped with sarcasm. “Not particularly, I was just walking through the garden and heard you talking to yourself so I decided to see what was going on.” Ethan told him with a shrug. “…Really?” Discord asked in confusion. “Yeah, I’m pretty good at the moment as far as things bothering me go.” Ethan told him with another shrug. “Thank Faust; you have no idea how annoying it is that the only time I get to have conversations with people is when they want me to help them with their emotional problems. ‘Oh Discord we hate you but you always give such good advice!’ I should start charging five bits a pop.” Discord said, throwing his hands into the air and rolling his eyes. “You’re incredibly bored aren’t you?” Ethan asked as he took a seat on a nearby log. “Oh, incredibly.” Discord said with a slight sigh. “Well, it was nice talking to you but if I keep my stomach waiting any longer than it already has it’s going to revolt.” Ethan said with a shrug as his stomach roared like a caged lion. “Oh very well then, just when things were getting interesting.” Discord said with a sigh. “See you later then.” Ethan called as he strolled away. “What a strange creature.” Discord said before shrugging and going back to doing absolutely nothing. *** “Has anyone seen Ethan this morning? I think I may have scared him earlier…” Twilight asked before trailing off as she scanned the breakfast table for the sight of her human friend. She asked for two reasons. One because she was feeling slightly guilty for blowing up at Ethan (even if it was completely and totally deserved), and two because she didn’t want him wandering around without an escort. “Sparky, you should know by now that it takes more than an angry purple unicorn to scare me.” Ethan said as he entered the room. “Well, except when you’re angry enough to rip someone’s leg off and then stab them in the eye with it; that’s pretty damn scary.” Ethan added with a smirk. That elicited several shocked gasps from the table. Sitting around Twilight were her five friends plus Celestia, Luna, Shining Armor, Cadence, and Blueblood. The gasps had come from her friends, along with Blueblood who turned towards Twilight in disgusted shock. “Twilight did what?” Rainbow Dash asked, looking at her purple friend with renewed interest. “She ripped the leg off of a cybernetic killing machine and stabbed her through the eye with the jagged end of the leg. I’m surprised that she or Shining hasn’t told you guys by now.” Ethan replied with a shrug. “There were things that I didn’t really want them to know Ethan.” Twilight said with a slight scowl. “Oh… my bad.” Ethan said, looking slightly guilty for a few seconds. “By the way, Sparky what happened to my bag? I think I left it lying around somewhere…” Ethan said before trailing off as he caught sight of the food on the table. Before Twilight could respond Ethan had commandeered the open seat next to Luna and grabbed a plate of waffles. He then pulled out a small flask of whiskey and poured himself a glass. “The breakfast of champions.” Ethan told the rest of the table as they eyed the meal he’s prepared. “Is that whiskey?” Luna inquired as she looked at the cup. “Yep. It’s been watered down pretty well so it won’t have any real effect on me.” Ethan replied as he took a sip of the liquid. “Might I have some?” Luna asked with a grin as she held up her own glass. “Of course my lady.” Ethan replied with a smirk as he poured the liquid into her glass. Luna took a sip and an odd look crossed her face. “I can’t tell if I like it or not. It’s old, there’s no doubt about that. But there’s an odd taste to it.” Luna said as she took another sip. “Well, it is two centuries old.” Ethan offered around a mouthful of syrup covered waffles. “That would explain it.” Luna said with a chuckle. “Anyways, Ethan you left your bag in my friends room, and I took the liberty of bringing it down to breakfast with me.” Twilight told him as she pulled the bag out from under the table with her TK and set it down next to where Ethan was sitting. “Thanks Sparky.” Ethan told the unicorn with a grin before he cut off another large slice of waffle off and popped it into his mouth. Blueblood scowled at him from the other end of the table, but Ethan ignored him. If the prince wanted to say something than he’d say it. And if it was offensive, then Ethan would punch him harder than he had last time. A loud commotion filled the dining hall and three familiar dark hippogriffs marched into the hall, being led by Ambassador Sharp. Once they reached the table all four bowed deeply to each and every person at the table, but as Ethan began to rise to return the bow Sharp stopped him with a quick talon swipe. “No, that is not necessary. I have brought before you the three of my people who dishonored themselves and yourself through their actions. Their fate is in your hands. Although I would prefer not to lose any of my kinsmen, if you decide that that is their fate then they shall gladly fall upon their swords.” Sharp said with a slight sigh. “Hmm…” Ethan said as he scratched his chin while he looked over the three hippogriffs in front of him. “Princess, you can’t possibly approve of this!” Rarity protested in shock. “Yeah, that’s not how we do things in Equestria!” Applejack added. “This is their culture, as much as I wish it wasn’t so it is what it is.” Celestia said with a sad shake of her head. Ethan got up from his seat and walked towards the three hippogriffs, who had bent their heads and were currently engaged in a staring contest with the floor. He stopped in front of them and began to pace back and forth, slowly looking each of them over. Then he went back to his bag by the table and rummaged around for a few seconds before he pulled out three small metal boxes. Ethan returned to his positions in front of the hippogriffs, and then handed them each a box and nodded for them to open them. The hippogriffs opened them slowly until the smell hit them, at which point they quickly pulled the lids off of the boxes. Inside each one was a perfectly cooked brahmin wellington. “Those boxes are refrigerated, so those should still be fine to eat. Anyways, my wife made them for me but I’d say that you three need them more at the moment.” Ethan said with a chuckle before he turned back to Sharp. “I don’t kill people unless I have to, and I definitely won’t make someone commit suicide over something as pointless as them tearing my duster.” “Then you have my thanks for your mercy Ethan. However, I am now further indebted to you.” Sharp told Ethan with a cock of his eagle-like head. “Alright, I can fix that.” Ethan said with a grin. “What did you have in mind?” Sharp asked quizzically. “Well, first off you pay whoever it is that’ll be creating my new outfit, because I can’t really wear this like it is.” Ethan said, gesturing at his torn riot gear. “That can be done easily.” Sharp said with a nod. “Good. The second thing I want is to know how your claws managed to penetrate the armor.” Ethan said. “It’s not very complex; over the years our talons have developed the ability to sheer through just about anything less than six inches thick.” One of the other hippogriffs replied around a mouthful of meat. “Oh, it’s natural. Alright then, I was worried for a minute. Hmm, what else… Ah yes, I want you to attempt to work for peace between yourselves and the griffins.” Ethan told Sharp. “I will not promise anything. However, given the debt that my people owe you, I shall at the very least attempt to not kill that kitten brained fool.” Sharp told Ethan with a slight sigh. “I prefer lion hearted, thanks. But you’re not exactly the most perceptive hen in the coop, are you Sharpy?” Ambassador Nymira said as she entered the room with a chuckle. Ambassador Sharp rounded on her and in a low predatory growl said. “If I was not honor bound against it I would rip out your pathetic entrails and feast upon them.” “Oh there it is; that’s the famous hippogriff temper acting up.” Ambassador Nymira said with a chuckle as she moved her face closer to Sharp’s so that they were practically touching. “Can you two go make out somewhere else, preferably somewhere soundproof?” Ethan asked as he casually shoved the two apart. “Touch my beak to hers? I’d rather die.” Sharp said with an incredulous glance towards Ethan. “I think you might like it Sharpy. After all, you hippogriffs have always favored different species, especially cattle if I recall…” Nymira told him with a smirk. “Well, you are rather fat.” Sharp shot back, causing Nymira to release a catlike hiss of indignation. “Please, can we try and keep things civil? It’s too early in the day for violence.” Celestia asked with a slight groan. “Yeah, save the violence for after lunch.” Ethan told them with a chuckle. “Fine. We shall recommence negotiations after lunch.” Sharp told Nymira, who smiled silkily at him before she slunk out of the room, putting extra emphasis on her hips with each step. Sharp and the other hippogriffs left a few moments later, leaving the room empty except for Ethan and the ponies. “Those two are so into each other.” Ethan said with a chuckle. “Are you insane?” Blueblood asked. “There’s a very high probability.” Ethan replied with a large grin.