//------------------------------// // Friends and Family // Story: My New Life In Equestria // by MaxBeezy //------------------------------// “Another day, another dungeon.” Daring Do said, as she tipped her hat. Using her flawless agility, she escaped from the spiky tomb, as she made her way to encounter the Ahuizotl once again, to retrieve what had been stolen from her. “This is rather interesting.” I told Twilight, “It’s very exciting, but also very familiar.” I was reading the first in a series of books about a Pegasus adventurer named Daring Do. Twilight convinced me to give it a read, once I told her that her house appeared to be lacking in imaginatively stimulating reading material. Though films and television existed in Equestria, Ponyville was an interestingly media free town. The only way to see either of the two, was to go to the hospital, and as far as I know, I didn’t have any broken bones. My shoulder and back have been killing me though. As for the book, I was almost done with Daring Do and The Quest for The Sapphire Stone, and was enjoying it very much. Still, something about it was pecking at the back of my brain. “Familiar?” Twilight asked, “There aren’t any other books like it, as far as I know.” “I mean, there’s a series of films where I came from, that remind me of this. Instead of a female Pegasus, it’s a guy named Indiana Jones.” “Really? How does he compare to Daring Do?” “Well, he was kind of an icon back in the day, even if his later adventures received…mixed results from the fans.” That was putting mildly. “Then Daring Do is already a step up.” she said, “There have been over twenty books on her, and none of them received a bad review. Sure, some books were better than others, but none of them were below par.” “If they’re as good as this, then I think me and Daring Do are going to get along just fine.” “Oh no you don’t.” Twilight takes away the book from me, “You’ve been reading that book all morning, with barely any breaks. You’re going outside.” “What? I don’t want to go outside! You know what’s out there!” “Yes yes, the newspaper came in, talking about your affair with Lyra.” “More like attempted rape!” “You had your hands dangerously close to her flank!” “You weren’t there, Twilight. I was…I was there when the strength of me fell.” I said in a deep and overly-dramatic voice. “Don’t be so overly dramatic. Besides, I told you to get over it.” she grabs me by the shirt collar, and pushes me towards the door, even with my resistance. “Go outside and get some sun. You look pale!” Within seconds I was flung out the door, onto the ground. What got her so pushy today? She was probably tired of my whining and moaning about the various mishaps I get myself into. It was Friday, the end of the week…the end of my first week in Ponyville. I’m still sore from all the injuries I had sustained during my stay. Sure, there were some good moments, but there’s no excusing the fact that I was still in pain. As I slowly walked through town, I saw the townsfolk looking over at me, giggling at the very sight of me. Did they all read the newspaper? Probably, what else did they have better to do? I haven’t read it myself, but I was sure that it was nothing but tabloid garbage, with paragraphs of fake interviews saying how in love we were or something. No sign of Lyra; she was probably just as embarrassed as I was. I neared the edge of town, and saw a lone house up a small hill. During my tour with Twilight, she said that that particular house belonged to Fluttershy. The thought then occurred to me that I hadn’t visited her yet, and that was my plan yesterday, before the Lyrapist incident. Ignoring the laughing of the citizens, I made my way out of Ponyville, and up the hill to Fluttershy’s house. I hoped that she was home, and wouldn’t be too scared of my sudden appearance at her doorstep. I’ve only had one conversation with her, and she looked very nervous and…well…shy. Maybe today was when I could show her my more friendly side. Stepping up to the door, I made sure my hair wasn’t a disheveled mess, and my clothes weren’t too wrinkly, and then knocked on the door three times. There was no response, but I heard the sound of hooves walking on the wood floor inside. Just to make sure, I knocked three times again. “Just a minute…” I heard Fluttershy’s soft voice say. A couple seconds pass, and the door opens. The instant she saw me, she ducked her head down in a slight blush. “Oh, it’s you!” she said in slight surprise. “W-what are you doing here?” “Hi, Fluttershy. I…I came to see you.” “You did?” she wondered, “How come?” “I realize that we didn’t talk much, back in New York, so I thought that I’d come here, to get to know you better.” “Oh, I-I see. I figured you’d be busy with your…um…other activities.” “What other activities?” I asked. Fluttershy trotted out of my vision to go somewhere in her house. I heard some things moving around, followed by the sounds of rustling paper. She came back, with a newspaper in her mouth. She then motioned to me to take it. I look at the front cover to see it; the picture of me and Lyra looking at the camera in fright, with a massive censor bar at the bottom. “What the hell?” I said, “Why is there even a censor bar there? There’s nothing to censor!” I look at Fluttershy, who looked noticeably nervous. “You don’t think I’m going to try something like this with you, do you?” “N-No.” she said. I don't think she believed me. “Because I won’t. I would never…ah…” my attempts at assuring her were halted by the pain in my shoulder. I move it around, in hopes of trying to straighten it out or something. Fluttershy took notice. “Oh my. Are you hurt?” her tone is almost motherly. “My shoulder and back have been killing me recently. I’ve tried everything.” I rub my shoulder a little bit. “Come inside. I’ll help you.” she moves out of my way, welcoming me to enter. I oblige, and walk inside. Her house is nice, very much in tune with nature, along with the added surprise of some animals hopping around the place, Squirrels, chickens, bunnies. While most would find the sight cute, I looked at all of them with suspicion that they were going to attack me at any moment. “Sit on the couch.” she says. I do so. “Now, tell me where it hurts.” “It hurts around this area.” I point at the center of my shoulder. She gently places her hooves on me, and starts to feel around the pained area. “So, are you going to give me some tea or…” POP! She jerked my shoulder in a quick fashion, effectively letting off a loud popping noise. My eyes widened, and my mouth agape at the feeling of my bone cracking. “AHHH!” I said. “What did you…” When she let go, I moved my shoulder around. “Wait a sec…” There was no more pain. In fact, I had no trouble moving my shoulder at all. “Hey, this…this is great! How…” “I know my way around a strained shoulder. It just needed some chiropractic help.” She gets up off the couch. “Follow me. We’ll do something about that back.” I follow her upstairs to her bedroom. Already, the warning signs in my brain went off like a fire alarm. She wouldn’t be planning what I think she’s planning…would she? Before Lyra, I probably would have thought this just a simple massage, but after Lyra, I have become wary of every pony’s intentions. “Lay down on your stomach.” she said calmly. “Are you sure about this?” I hesitantly asked. “Of course, I’ve done this many times.” I could’ve just said no, and booked it on out of there, but the more sensible side of me was convincing in its argument that Fluttershy meant no harm. Besides, she was a shy pony who not minutes ago, blushed upon eye contact. I lay down on the bed, like she wanted. It didn’t take long to feel her move her way on top of my back. All four hooves were on by back. She moves them carefully, like a cat kneading a blanket to get comfortable. Then, she moves to a sitting position, with her back legs pressing against my waist, and only her fore-hooves on my back. I’d be lying if I said my face didn’t become crimson red at this point. “Oh my, you look red. Are you okay?” “Yeah. Totally fine. Don’t worry about me.” I said. Trying my hardest to be as straight faced as possible. It seemed to work, as I felt her forelegs move their way around my shoulders, beginning the massage. She was gentle to the touch, with a twinge of forcefulness to it. I felt the straining in my shoulders beginning to fade. “Oh…my goodness…” I said quietly. “You have a lot of tension in your shoulders. When was the last time you had one of these?” “Last time? This is my first time.” “I see. You should have come to me much sooner.” she said, as she moved her hooves down my back. She hit the spot where the pain was coming from, and I visibly winced. She caught on. “There we are. You might feel some pressure.” I felt her massage my back, and a series of pops were heard. I suppose my encounter with Big Mac put a couple things out of place. In minutes, the pain began to subside, and all I could feel was relaxation at the feeling of her massage. Pretty soon, it became one of the most comfortable things I have ever experienced. “There we go. All better.” she said with confidence, as she got off my back. It took me a little bit to realize the massage was over. When I did, I got up off the bed. Miraculously, I felt nothing in terms of pain when I moved around. “Woah. Thanks Fluttershy.” I said, “Now I know who to go to, next time I end up in pain." “You’re very welcome.” she smiled, “Now that that's over with, do you want to meet my friends?” “I think I already did.” “Oh, not Twilight and the others, I mean my animal friends.” Considering that the ponies themselves are technically animals, my eyebrow rose ever so slightly. Instead of bringing up the minor technicality, and in the interest of being nice, I chose to follow her out to the backyard, where I saw many animals of different kinds frolicking about. There were birds, bees, turtles, squirrels, raccoons, chickens, and a bear. Wait…a BEAR?! “Fluttershy, what’s a bear doing here?!” I screamed and pointed at the creature. “Don’t mind him. He’s very friendly. Aren’t you Mr. Bear?” The bear growls a friendly growl, as she patted him on the snout. “So, is this some kind of animal sanctuary?” “No. I just have a way with animals. They come to me if they want any help, be it food or shelter or…massages. And I am more than happy to oblige them. The only permanent residents are my chickens, and Angel.” “Angel?” I asked. The moment I did, I felt something kick at my leg. I looked down to see an angry looking bunny, furiously kicking me. “Angel! Don’t try to harm our guest!” Fluttershy asserted. Angel grumbled and hopped away. “I’m sorry about that.” “That’s okay. He didn’t hurt me. It’ll take more than an angry bunny to…” “LOOK OUT BELOW!” A voice called out. WHAM! I was soon tackled to the ground by a tremendous blue force with a rainbow mane. This was obviously Rainbow Dash. As she shook her mane of any dirt, I just laid there in disbelief that I have been hurt…again. “Okay, this bit is getting old.” I said. “Sorry about that.” Rainbow Dash said, standing up on top of me. “I told you to move.” “Don’t be silly.” I joked, “I was merely providing you cushioning for your landing.” I made no attempt to hide my sarcasm. “Ha ha, very funny Mr. Human.” Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Can you get off me now, please?” “Why? Feel like making out with me too?” she chuckled. “Oh, in the name of…!” I angrily sighed. Yet another one that has read the paper. “No! I do not feel like making out with you!” “Don’t be so grumpy, Mr. Grumperson. I was only kidding.” she gets off of me, “Hey Fluttershy, did you forget what day it is?” “Oh! I almost forgot! Thanks for reminding me.” “What’s today?” I asked, sitting up. “Fluttershy here cheers me on, while I train in the fields every Friday. Today, I want her to cheer me on extra hard, now that the Wonderbolts say I have a shot! I have to do my absolute best!” “Right, Twilight mentioned the Wonderbolts yesterday. What are they exactly?” Rainbow Dash’s eyes beamed. “Are you kidding? The Wonderbolts are the greatest team of Pegasi flyers in all of Equestria! It is my absolute dream to be on their team!” “Well, I wish you luck.” “I don’t need luck! I have speed, style, and awesomeness! Come on Fluttershy!” “Can Matt come with us too? You could show him how cool you are.” “Hmm….” she thinks for a few moments, “You have a point there. Everypony has to see how cool I am once in awhile. Come on, Grumpy. Time to show you a lesson in coolness!” A little while later, I was sitting in a wide open field with Fluttershy, watching Rainbow Dash doing all kinds of aerial acrobatics that would make jet pilots shake in their books. Flips, spins, barrels rolls, dives, shooting through clouds, spinning the clouds…it was all very impressive. The problem was that she had been doing these tricks for more than a couple hours. It was around four in the afternoon, and she showed no sign of stopping. To keep myself from becoming dizzy from all the flips, I looked over at Fluttershy, to see the look of happiness never leaving her face. “How long does she usually spend up there?” I asked. “She could be there all day, if she wants to.” “And you just sit down here, and watch the whole thing?” “Oh yes, I can never get tired of watching her fly.” I continue to watch her, as a smirk comes to my face. It was all too obvious. “Sounds like you two are pretty close, I reckon?” “She’s my best friend. We’ve known each other since flight school.” “How did you two first meet?” “Well, you wouldn’t have known this, but I was a really shy pony back when I was a filly.” “Really? I never would have guessed.” I feign surprise. “These colts were bullying me for my clumsiness, when she came in and challenged them to a race to defend me.” “How did the race turn out?” “I don’t know. I was knocked off a cloud, where I first encountered my animal friends, and got my cutie mark. But Rainbow Dash’s sonic rainboom was more than enough to tell me that she won.” She said with a smile. “We have been friends ever since.” “It’s interesting that you two are such good friends. She seems pretty hot headed and cocky, while you’re very…timid. If you don't mind me saying.” “I don't mind at all. Yes, some would find it very odd. She can be a little arrogant at times, but I adore her. She’s the most talented pony I’ve ever met.” “And how long has it been since you started having feelings for her?” “Two year…EEEP!” she squeals at the admission. She covers her mouth, in a desperate attempt to mute what she was saying, but it wasn’t going to work. She looked into my eyes as she uncovered her mouth “Please don’t say anything! I beg you!” “My lips are sealed.” I told her. Rainbow Dash landed hooves first with a powerful thud, standing triumphant and sweating over her rigorous training session. “Now, how was THAT for a lesson in awesomeness?!” “It was great.” I said, “I have to hand…I mean hoof it to you, that was some impressive flying.” “What? No sarcastic quip?” Dash wondered. “Only when I'm annoyed." I smiled, "I’m being completely honest with you, that was some top notch stuff. I kind of makes me wonder why the Wonderbolts haven’t accepted you on their team, yet.” “That’s what I’m saying! I’ve been wondering about that for years!" she looks at me with a smirk. I guess she doesn't see me as a complete dweeb now. "See Fluttershy? This guy totally gets it!” She notices Fluttershy being quieter than usual. “Hey, Flutters? You okay?” “Oh, yes. I’m fine.” Fluttershy said, being snapped from being shocked at my discovery. “That was fantastic.” “Are you sure? You seem kind of spaced out.” “I’m just worried about the animals. It’s almost time for their feeding.” “Is that all? If you’re worried about them that much, I’ll help you out.” Dash turns her attention back to me, “Thanks for indulging me, Matt. You seem like an alright guy.” “You seem like an alright pony, and you’re welcome. I suppose I should take my leave now. I’ll see you two later.” I waved goodbye to them, and I was on my way back to Ponyville. Aside from the unexpected tackle, the visit actually wasn’t too bad. I could get used to Dash’s more aggressive attitude, but she’s nice when she needs to be. Plus, she was an impressive flyer, despite my impatience in the final few minutes of the training session. As for Fluttershy? She gave a killer massage, and was surprised to discover a little bit about her personal life as well. I hoped that everything would work out for the two of them, I decided to just let it play out, rather than be a busybody, and butt in. Now that’s over with, it was time to go back to pushy Twilight. Hope she was in a better mood than she was in the morning. I get to the house, and push on the door. Strangely, it didn’t open. I turned the knob, and it didn’t turn. It was locked. Weird, usually the place was always unlocked. Not having a key, my only option was to knock on it. Like Fluttershy’s, I knocked three times. No response, but I heard some trotting in the house. “Twilight? It’s me. What’s goin…” The door opens, I stare into the panicked eyes of Twilight. “What are you doing here? I told you to be outside.” “I was outside for four hours, Twilight. I have to go back inside every once in awhile.” “You can’t come inside yet, I’m…working on an experiment.” Her eyes shifted back and forth. She was lying. “What’s in there that’s making you so…” “Twilight? Honey? Who is that?” A feminine voice asked. “It’s no one, Mom. Just a salespony.” Mom? “Your Mom is in there? Why didn’t you say so?” “Matt, please. It’s not…” I pushed past her. I wasn’t going to miss the opportunity to meet Twilight’s mother. “MATT!” she yells. I walk inside to see two ponies staring rather frightened at me. Good reason too, I suppose, they haven’t seen a human before, and judging by Twilight’s insistence that I didn’t come in, they haven’t heard about me, either. “Twilight? Who is this?” The female one asked. This was Twilight’s mother. The male on the right I assumed was her Father. Twilight angrily sighed at me, frustrated at my behavior. “Mom…Dad…this is my friend…Matt. He’s from another dimension, and dropped here due to a spell I created. He’ll be staying with me for the time being.” Her parents paused for a good while, confused at this new-found revelation. Her Mother whispered to her husband about god knows what, while still looking at me. “Twilight…” her Dad said, “How come you were hiding this from us?” “I wasn’t. Well…I kind of was. I was going to tell you.” “You know better, Twilight.” her Mother sternly says, “Hiding your coltfriend away from us.” “I know, I…..” Twilight and myself caught on that one word at the same time. Coltfriend. Even I knew she really meant ‘Boyfriend’ in my terms. We had the exact same reaction. “WHAT?!” Twilight and I screamed. “That’s the reason why you didn’t tell us, isn’t it? Why else would you hide him away like that?” “Mom! I…” “I’m sorry Mrs. Sparkle.” I interrupted, “It’s was my idea to hide myself away. I wasn’t sure that you would accept a creature like me to be dating your Daughter.” I wrap an arm around the thoroughly bewildered Twilight. “What are you…” she whispered. “Just play along.” I whisper back. “Well…” she looked back at her Husband, “As long as she’s happy, we suppose. It’s just that she always talked about…” “THAT was just a crush, Mom. No need to bring that up.” Twilight quickly said. Filled with secrets, this one. “But…yeah…this is my….boyfriend. That’s what they called it in his world.” “I see.” Twilight’s Mother got up first. “It’s nice to meet you.” she said, reaching out a hoof. “I’m Velvet, and my Husband over there is Orion.” I shake her hoof. “Good to meet ya, son. Welcome to the family.” Orion said with delight. When we sat down, we then proceeded to have a nice long chat about myself. I told them where I was from, and the circumstances on how I got into Equestria in the first place. They seemed genuinely interested in the story that I told. Twilight just nodded, and would chime in every so often to fill in a gap in my story. When pressed on the matter on how we developed a romantic relationship, we merely chuckled, and told them that things happen, especially in the short amount of time that I was there. Orion joked that Twilight was probably just interested in me for scientific purposes, rather than romantic. He had no idea how right he was. The conversation and subsequent dinner took a few hours, and the sun had finally went down. It was time for Twilight’s parents to go. “We had a nice time, Twilight. And you…” Velvet turned to me, “Are a very nice young col…I mean Man. I look forward to meeting you again.” “Me too.” I said. “You better treat her right.” Orion said, “If you two break up, it will be under mutual circumstances. If I find out that you did something…” “Dad, please.” Twilight laughed, “Go home, it’s getting late.” “Meh, you’re right. In any case, it was nice meeting you, Matt.” “Likewise…sir.” Orion and Velvet make their way out the door. Twilight’s smile instantly disappeared into a look of anger. “I think that went rather…” POW! I was socked in the face by one of Twilight’s hooves. “Holy crap, Twi! What the hell was that about?” “What do you think?! Now they’re going to tell their friends, and I won’t hear the end of it!” “Then, now we’re even!” “What in Equestria are you talking about?” “That was for laughing at me when I got molested!” “You said it was okay!” “I was expecting a slight chuckle, not a full on laugh track!” “UGH!!! You humans are so weird! You’re okay with something one minute, then hate it the next! I don’t understand you!” Twilight storms up the stairs in a huff, furious at me. “Hey, don’t you want to hear how my day was?” “Owlicious! Sic em’!” she yelled. The Owl suddenly came out of literally nowhere, screeching it’s battle cry, as it prepared to tear my face into shreds. I ran around the house, trying to avoid its razor sharp claws. A couple scratches to the arm, and some torn pillows later, I bolted outside the house, and into the backyard. The door slammed shut, and I heard the lock be put into place. I walked back to the door, knocking on it. “Twilight?” No response. “Twilight, I’m really sorry.” Still nothing. “Come on, where do you expect me to sleep?” The window above me opened up, and a blanket and a pillow dropped on my head. The window closed right back up. “I guess that’s her response then.” I said to myself. “I really have to come up with something tomorrow.” I walked to a nice part of the lawn, setting up the blanket. It wasn’t even the one from my bed. I was certain that it hadn’t even been put through the wash. I unfurled it, and set it on the lawn. Just then, I heard a rustle in the bushes, snapping at my attention. “Hello?” I whispered, “Is someone there?” It got quiet real fast. The person inside me, the one aware of every horror movie ever, started to yell at me to try and get back in the house, lest I get attacked by some killer in a hockey mask. “Lyra? Is that you?” Then again, I could just go back into idiot mode. “I have no time for your rapist ways. So just come out.” The bushes around me begin to rustle. I see glowing blue, evil eyes poke out of every bush. “Uh…yeah…I’m going to turn around, and take off running. No chasing after me now. Okay? So let me just…” RUN! I turn around, but then I was grabbed by the pant legs by sharp teeth, dropping me to the ground, and dragging me into the bushes. I struggled, and punched at whatever was trying to assault me, but before I could get another hit out, I was struck in the back of the head, effectively knocking me out. I was in for a long night.