“I had an absolutely lovely time, Button.”
“I’m glad to hear it, Rarity. I had a lot of fun too! And the food was really great, wasn’t it? We should go out like this more often!”
Don’t turn around and look at him with those glistening eyes.
“You— you really mean it?”
“Of course I do. In fact, forgive me for saying this, but… Rarity, you’re one of the most beautiful mares I’ve ever met.”
Oh, you charmer…
“Oh, you charmer! Stop it! You’re going to make me blush! Well, I’d better just— oh! Oh, my! Heh, heh! Dropped my keys!”
“Do you need any help opening your door?”
No thank you.
“No thank you, I got it! And… here we go! Ahh. Home sweet home… well, never minding the mess anyway. That’s what happens when you live with a rambunctious younger sister, a cat that doesn’t always like to get along, and a head full of ideas. Oh! Feel free to come in, Button.”
“Well, apart from that, it’s a very nice place. Very homely, not like other fashion designers’ homes I’ve seen in the magazines. They always like to put their big egos into their interior designs. … So, Rarity?”
“Yes?”
“You said you live with your younger sister?”
“Yes. Sweetie Belle, her name is. But she’s… staying at a friend’s house for the night. So it’s just the two of us.”
“…Really?”
Oh, good gracious.
“I know it’s a mess, but my bedroom is always neat and tidy, and I promised you I’d have something very fascinating to show you inside.”
“Oh, boy… can’t wait.”
…How could you be so oblivious, Rarity?
“Isn’t it just darling? 57 different varieties of gemstones and minerals, all on one board! Over here is Brittania silver, and that’s diopside, obsidian, carnelian, emerald… Oh, it’s just a personal collecting hobby at most, but there’s something so enticing to all of these stones. Wouldn’t you agree?”
“Sure, I… I guess so.”
“…Is something wrong, Button? Oh! I’m boring you, aren’t I? I’m so sorry. I’m still new to relationships and I honestly thought that—”
“Oh no, no, no! It’s not that at all! It’s just… well… I was kind of hoping there was… something else you wanted to do in here.”
And… there it goes.
“Hmm? Something else? Like what?”
“Well, how about you get on the bed and I’ll show you?”
Wide eyes. Now it’s beginning to click, isn’t it?
“I— Yo— W— You’re giving to… are you going to give me a hoof massage or something?”
Stop lying to yourself.
“No, Rarity. I was thinking of something a little bit more… intense.”
“Oof! HEY!”
Yes, because pushing a lady onto her own bed is such a high mark of gentlecoltly conduct.
“Just what do you think you’re doing!?”
“Ssh, ssh. Just relax… and let me do the rest. They don’t call me Button Down for nothing…”
“No! What are you doing? Stop it! Get away from me! You… Put that… No! STOP THIS!”
That’s right, Rarity. Give that blowhard the no-blow!
“OWW! Rarity! You… you bucked me!”
“Well if I hadn’t, you would’ve fucked me! How is that any better, you… you… brute!?”
“What are you talking about? I thought you wanted to have sex with me! That was the vibe I was getting from you and your fluttery eyebrows ever since we met at the bar!”
Somepony needs to conduct better research on one’s sex signals…
“Even if I was looking for some pleasure, how dare you try to advance on a lady without her consent! I never took you as such a rude, perverted individual!”
“Well… I never took you as such a selfish, sheltered priss!”
“WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME!?”
You should’ve seen how crimson my face probably was at this stage.
“Ooohh… That’s it, Button Down! I’m done with you! Leave now!”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me! JUST LEAVE!”
“Fine then… your loss, ‘Miss Rarity’.”
What does he know? I have lost nothing of importance…
…so I keep telling myself.
“Rarity! Are you here? Sorry, but I forgot my toothbrush and… Rarity? A-are you okay?”
“Yes, Sweetie Belle. I’m fine. … Just fine.”
That night, there couldn't be enough tissues in all of Equestria.