In the Mind's Eye
The door to the library had only just closed with Alpha Centauri still lost in thought with his eyes focused on the ground when a rainbow blur whizzed past him only to stop and hover just in-front of that same door, poised to knock and looking back at the two stallions. Rainbow Dash and Rarity had gone to the hospital earlier looking for Alpha only to be informed that he had gone to the library by doctor Heartstrong.
"There you are!" exclaimed an excited Rainbow Dash, "I almost thought you were trying to avoid me," she finished with playful smile. "Here, I found these back at the crater!" With that she shoved the stylized shoes at Alpha just as he had looked up at her. His eyes went wide when he saw the offending objects however.
"Gah!" Alpha jumped back as if he had been slapped in the face, "Not those again!"
"Wha-?"
"They assaulted me! You were there, don't you remember?" Alpha made a motion as if he was going to smack himself in the eye but stopped just before actually doing it. Rainbow Dash frowned.
"Are all the stallions just big colts where you come from?" At that remark Alpha shifted his gaze to stare off in the distance, sitting back on his haunches.
"Oh leave the poor dear alone Dashie, he's still recovering from that nasty spill, isn't that right my handsome wittle runway model?" Rarity had just caught up in time to catch the last part of the exchange and had started scribbling down numbers on a hovering pad while a glowing measuring tape snaked its way around different sections of Alpha's body, much to his discomfort, and completely distracting him from what could be construed as Rarity's reference to his size, despite standing a little taller than she did.
"Wh- what?" he asked in a distracted tone, trying in vain to catch the tape between his fore-hooves.
"Oh darling you simply must try on my newest creations for the males, you have the perfect figure for a fashion show, young and lean with this spotless white coat of yours that goes with any color! And all of it is thanks to those!" Rarity finished, indicating the shoes still sitting in Rainbow Dash's care with a wave of her hoof, not missing a beat as she finished up taking the measurements. Alpha finally managed to grab the tape just as the magical glow around it subsided and he started to shake it for no good reason before realizing everyone was staring at him. Grinning in an attempt to stave off embarrassment he handed Rarity back her tape before speaking.
"Uh … yeah I don't really know what that is but I'm not sure if I like the idea of putting on anything that tries to put my eye out."
"Hey, you're supposed to be teaching me those moves! I brought your trick shoes that you couldn't possibly have done it without, now stop stalling!" Rainbow Dash spoke up, her frustrations with being ignored finally getting the better of her.
"I was going to tell you the first time back at the hospital but you flew off before I could say anything … I can't remember anything from before my … accident … so I really have no idea how I did … whatever it was I did!" Alpha tried to explain. Rainbow Dash landed in front of Alpha before replying.
"Likely story! You're telling me that you've almost completely healed but conveniently don't remember anything? I bet you want to keep it a secret don't you? I bet you want to try out for the Wonderbolts too! It all makes sense now-"
"Actually Miss, he does have amnesia, doctor Heartstrong said so himself. And as a matter of fact he has to be getting back to the hospital right now- doctor's express orders," Night Stick cut in, starting to get concerned about being delayed in his first 'extra-curricular' assignment. Rainbow Dash made a sound of frustration before a familiar glow encapsulated the shoes and floated them back over to Rarity.
"Oh come now mister uh … ?" Rarity began.
"Night Stick, ma'am, hospital security," he said in an official, and rather proud tone.
"Night Stick- what a handsome name, oh and you're so fit too, do you work out?" Rarity asked as she gently brushed a hoof over his cheek.
"W-w-well-"
"My my, a fine specimen of a stallion like yourself must have been in several fashion shows already! I'm sure you won't mind if we just took a small detour over to my boutique so that you strapping gentlecolts can have a look at one particular design that I'm sure will change his mind … won't you?" Rarity finished after having walking back in front of Night Stick, turning her head to look over her shoulder at him and fluttering her long eyelashes.
"I s-suppose there's no harm in a small detour," Night Stick said grinning bashfully, completely ignoring the fact that Rarity's boutique was in the opposite direction.
Rainbow Dash was still fuming over her plans gone awry when the other three walked off, leaving her deep in thought. 'So he wants to play it that way huh? Amnesia- bah! I bet that's a made-up egghead word and that other guy is a friend he brought along to make his story sound better … well two can play at this game! He can't keep up that act forever. If I keep my eye on him I'll probably catch him practicing again, then I'll definitely see how he did it!' She smiled maniacally to herself before fluttering off to join the others.
"So what exactly is this … fashion thing you speak of, and who are you showing it to?" asked Alpha as the four ponies walked through the village on their way to Rarity's shop, the Carousel Boutique. He couldn't stop looking around at the many interesting sights; stalls with ponies selling various wares, freshly baked goods cooling by the window of a ridiculously colorful building, pegasi moving around the clouds, houses of all shapes, sizes and colors. Despite all the distractions he still managed to construct the question coherently enough for the others to understand even though the puzzled expressions on their faces might have suggested otherwise.
"Oh the travesty!" Rarity began, laying the back of her hoof over her forehead, just above her horn, "I would have at least expected there to be some sense of fashion where you came from, but to not even know the word- of all the worst things that could happen this is THE. WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!" she finished with wide eyes. Rainbow Dash, knowing her friend all too well, was glaring holes in Rarity's back when Alpha spoke.
"This sounds serious! I hope-"
Rainbow Dash fell over laughing behind them causing Alpha to look back at her in confusion.
"Don't mind her," she began when she finally got back in control of her heaving sides, "She makes everything related to her work sound serious."
"Pay no attention to these barbarians … err … what was your name again?" Rarity asked.
"I can't remember … but Twilight Sparkle said that this pattern on my flank looks like some place called 'Alpha Centauri' so … we kinda went with that," Alpha explained with a half-hearted smile.
"Delightful! It does suit you quite well you know," Rarity beamed in an attempt to brighten the mood.
"Uh … yea I guess so?" Alpha replied quizzically.
"Fashion my dear Alpha," Rarity continued on with her usual flare, "Is the very essence of life! Why without it we would still be living in caves and covering ourselves with mud for festive occasions- could you imagine? Mud! And-and … berry juice!" At this point Rarity made a face like she was about to show everyone what she had for breakfast, just as they were approaching her boutique. "No-no-no, this simply won't do of course. Now mind you, I have only just begun the design, but the sketch is very detailed. One peep and I'm sure you'll be just dying to try it on when it's finished," she ended with a smile, her horn lighting up as she opened the door and led the way inside.
The others were looking back and forth between each other shrugging as they walked in. Alpha lost his footing, lurching forward suddenly before regaining his balance as he slipped on one of the many design sketches still strewn around the floor from earlier.
"Oh dear my apologies, Dash was in such a hurry when she came by that I had no time at all to clean up!" Rarity explained, magically picking up most of the sketches and bringing them together in a neat stack by the door to the inner rooms. Alpha nearly fell again as the sketch beneath his hoof was snatched away by the uncaring whims of the levitation spell, Rarity not even noticing as she walked calmly over to her main work station with a proud smile on her face.
"Behold! My greatest creation ever!" she reared up on her back legs and waved toward the highly detailed sketch with a flourish of her fore hooves, sparkling magical lights popping out of nowhere like miniature fireworks.
The other three ponies looked at the design with a mixture of astonishment and marvel. Despite its lack of color in certain places, purposefully so by indication of arrows in the diagram clearly stating that they could vary in those areas, the uniform depicted was indeed a work of art by any standard. It actually looked quite a bit like the Wonderbolts uniform, but instead of a mostly blue jumpsuit, it was black, and instead of lighting patterns there were varying patterns of flames along the sides and legs. There were no goggles shown in the diagram, nor did it look like any would be necessary as there was a complicated spate of scribbling that, while it did little to explain what the shaded eye sockets meant exactly, still managed to indicate that something interesting was going on there. Had one looked closer, one would have seen that the flame patterns on the fore-legs were slightly enlarged versions of the patterns on the obsidian shoes themselves and would give the effect of an enhanced glow once they were adorned with the uniform. And finally, there were fire opals and rubies at the 'source' of each flame, stuck onto the paper by some means instead of drawn … perhaps for added inspiration or simply as a work-in-progress.
Rarity opens one eye after she had held her pose for the first few seconds in silence, worried that the quiet was because no one present liked the design, worst of all, Alpha. She was pleasantly surprised however when she found Rainbow Dash gawking at it with what she recognized to be pure adoration, but had an instant mood swing when she noticed Alpha's head was twisted to the side as if he could not quite understand what he was looking at.
"So … is this fashion? It looks … hot …" he managed to get out.
"Why yes I suppose one could call it that," Rarity joked to herself in relief. For a moment she thought it would be the Grand Galloping Gala dress debacle all over again.
"No I mean … it seems like wearing it on a sunny day would be very … uncomfortable," Alpha tried to explain.
"Oh no, the measurements I took earlier will ensure that my first one is sized just perfectly for you my dear. And the material I intend to use is quite breathable, I assure you!"
"Um … okay but what does it do … exactly? I mean … would it be any different from … you know … not wearing it?"
At this point Rainbow Dash was giving Alpha an incredulous look, soon joined by Rarity for albeit different reasons.
"Are you kidding me? This is just about the coolest uniform I've seen, ever!" Rainbow Dash erupted. "I can understand not knowing fashion, but don't you even have a sense of coolness?"
"Ummm … huh?"
"You know flying through Ponyville and everypony's staring at you because you just look so awesome? Heh, yeah I do that a lot," Rainbow Dash added the last part with an unimpressed expression.
"Can't say I know what that's like."
"Well don't you worry Alpha, when I'm done with this you will be the talk of Canterlot- neigh, the talk of Equestria!" Rarity beamed in renewed delight.
"And that's … good, right?" Alpha asked, not quite following. Rainbow Dash made a frustrated noise as she turned to the door, casually walking away.
"Look I have places to be and clouds to nap on, I'll see everypony later," she said as she took off through the doorway.
"Oh Alpha, it's as if you have never truly lived life before." Rarity could not have guessed just how close she was to the truth. "But don't you worry hun, when we become famous you'll have all the bits you'd ever want at your disposal to really enjoy life! Why, you could even hire somepony to take you on a grand tour across all of Equestria!"
Alpha looked thoughtful for a moment and then looked up with a happy expression, "Does that mean I could repay my debt too?"
"Debt? Why … yes I'm sure you could repay just about any debt when we get to that point. But what is this debt you speak of? Have you remembered-"
"I'll do it!" Alpha interrupted, grinning happily.
"Marvelous! Oh this is just wonderful- but please, enough chit-chat I must get back to work! Shoo now, everyone out, these things take absolute concentration you know," Rarity rambled on, nudging the two ponies back to the door. "Come by tomorrow evening, I'll have something by then," and with that the door slammed in their faces, a faint and happy humming slowly receding behind it.
Alpha looked to Night Stick for an explanation only to get a shrug in response.
"Come on, let's get you back to the hospital, I've got to get some sleep before my shift starts this evening," Night Stick said, looking up at the sunny late morning sky.
From the desk of Doctor Heartstrong, Ponyville General Hospital
Dear Dr Tintenflecks,
It is with great urgency that I write to you on this fine morning. I have a very strange case of a patient that you may find quite interesting.
Last night he was brought to me in critical condition and it took me the entire evening in surgery to stabilize him. But this is where it gets interesting! By some miracle of what I presume to be magic, he is not only almost fully healed but up and walking about this morning! Now you must be wondering why I would be writing to such a prominent psychologist about this, but despite my patient's amazing recovery he still has come out of it with a severe case of amnesia.
I have heard many accounts of your success with memory regression techniques and given the few cases of amnesia ever recorded I thought you might want to give it a try in this case to see if your techniques could be of any help.
Given the severity of the injuries to the brain, any normal pony would take weeks to recover from this kind of problem. However as was clearly demonstrated this morning, my patient is anything but normal. I regret to also inform you that (and this is why I must plead with you to make a journey to Ponyville as soon as you can) he had a … violent episode. Luckily nopony was seriously hurt and it only lasted but a few moments, however I am concerned about repeated occurrences. I understand that your time must be limited, but please consider my request.
Professionally yours,
Doctor Heartstrong
It was early evening by the time doctor Heartstrong came to see Alpha. He was asked to stay in his ward when he was escorted back to the hospital that morning and had spent most of the day staring out the window, admiring the lively bustle of Ponyville's citizens, even at that distance. But even this had lost its appeal by the time Bedside Manor came in with the afternoon meal. Unfortunately she could not stick around to keep him company for very long since she had to attend to the other residents.
"How are you feeling Mister Centauri?" the doctor spoke up as he entered the room, interrupting the game Alpha had made out of counting the cracks in the walls.
"Three hundred and seven," Alpha said absent mindedly, getting up and stretching laboriously.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"Um, nevermind. So can I go now?"
"I am truly sorry to have to keep you here so long, but please trust me when I say that it is absolutely necessary for your own good … and the good of everypony else," Heartstrong muttered the last bit under his breath.
Alpha's expression would have broken Bedside Manor's heart had she been present at that moment, but quickly changed when the doctor continued on in higher spirits.
"Luckily for you my boy, it seems that the pony I wanted you to have a chat with found your case to be just as interesting as I did, maybe even more so! And who knows, maybe he will even be able to get your memory back- now-now," Heartstrong raised a hoof to calm down the now overly excited young stallion, his balance on only two hooves unwavering through a full day of practice with his leg still in the sling, "Don't get your hopes up too high. His methods may be impressive, but this has never been tried as a cure for amnesia before."
Alpha froze in the middle of what might have been considered a victory dance before returning to all fours and speaking up, "At this point I'll do anything to be able to get out of here- no offense but I can only see so much from the window," he finished with a weak smile.
Doctor Heartstrong just smiled with understanding, "Well come along then, we'll get you comfortable in the interview room while the good doctor gets settled from his train ride." And with that, Alpha followed doctor Heartstrong through the doorway, almost bouncing in his steps, though not quite as vigorously as a certain pink pony.
"Vhat do you see now?" Alpha was staring at a white piece of card with what looked like paint dropped onto its center. Holding the card was an older green unicorn stallion with a salt and pepper mane and a slightly curved horn of average length. He made no attempt to hide his thick accent; the love of his home town of Hufenstadt bordered on obsessive despite his more permanent residence in Canterlot ever since he attained Equestria-wide renown in his profession.
"A rock?" Alpha answered for the fifth time in a row. The green stallion rubbed his temples in frustration before dropping the stack of cards onto the only table in the room, the resulting sound echoing off the undecorated walls. It was one of the few rooms in Ponyville's hospital that had no windows and it more resembled an interrogation room in the police station of one of the large cities than a psychiatric evaluation ward.
"Forgiff me mein friend, but I am inklined to belief szat he is doing szis on purpose," he said to doctor Heartstrong who was standing off to the side while they were seated on either side of the table.
"Alpha can you explain to doctor Tintenflecks what I told you before coming in?" doctor Heartstrong asked politely. Tintenflecks was Equestria's foremost pony psychologist and expert in the field of equine mental health. After the worrying events that occurred the previous night, Heartstrong made sure to send out a letter to him shortly before writing to Twilight Sparkle. To his surprise, the good doctor took the earliest train from his office in Canterlot and had arrived that late that afternoon, heading straight to the hospital without so much as opening the only bag he had brought with him.
"He said the more I co-operated the faster I could get out of here … don't get me wrong, this place is nice and all, but after going outside earlier I can't wait to get back out there!" Alpha answered as completely as he could.
"Vell szen ze only conclusion from szeez tests is szat you haf been livink einen cave your entire life. But enough of szat, tell me more of szis incident szis mornink," urged doctor Tintenflecks.
Alpha groaned at having to retell the tale again. "I was talking to Twilight Sparkle by the window and the next thing I knew everyone was staring at me as I hung from the ceiling-"
"Yes yes but do you remember vhat it is you shpoke about?"
Alpha crossed his forelegs on the table and donned a look of intense concentration. After a few moments he began hesitantly, "The scenery … the colors to be specific … and the smells-"
"Vhat kindt of shmells?"
"I don't … I can't put words to them, it all seemed completely new to me … the air that came through the window was … alive? Does that make any sense?"
"Yes yes, please go on."
"There were so many scents mixed together, each one so very new … well except maybe the dirt, I got really familiar with that yesterday, but … even that seemed … alive! The smells from inside the room were also very interesting … oh and that's when Twilight made an interesting remark about not having any smells where I come from … could that be true?"
"Yes yes, vhat happened next?" the doctor asked, dismissing Alpha's question with complete indifference.
"Ummm …" Alpha began, but then furrowed his brow in deep thought again. "There's a gap- when I try to think of anything in that space of time … everything becomes … silent, that's the best word I can think of. After the gap I'm stuck to the roof," Alpha finished shaking his head in frustration.
At this point doctor Heartstrong had ambled over to doctor Tintenflecks and they were whispering to each other. Alpha's frustration was starting to become annoyance. The irrational thought that they knew what had happened to him and were with-holding the truth crossed his mind, but he quickly pushed it away. These ponies had shown him nothing but kindness since he woke up, apparently even before that considering his brush with death. Not only that but they seemed genuinely perplexed by the circumstances of his 'appearance' in that crater. It might have been plausible to think that one or two ponies could conspire to keep a secret and were able to put up such a convincing show of it, but when there were so many involved the likelihood dropped rather quickly. On top of that, what would be the point of asking him for information they already knew?
"Alpha?" called doctor Heartstrong for the second time, finally breaking Alpha out of his thoughts.
"Yes?"
"We want to try something to see if we can reproduce the same reaction you had earlier today with Miss Twilight, would that be okay with you?"
"B-b-but … you said I hurt her … what if I hurt someone else?"
"This is why we are asking your permission before proceeding. You see we would like to restrain you first- you will of course be released as soon as we have determined that it is safe to do so."
Alpha looked to the floor glumly. He did want to get some answers, but he didn't much like the idea of being unable to move. He liked the idea of hurting someone else even less.
"If we can ensure that you won't involuntarily hurt another pony I would have no more reason to keep you here Alpha. It means you would be able to go outside without someone escorting you around," doctor Heartstrong added, attempting to 'sweeten the deal' even though it was the truth and he was going to follow through regardless. At his words a smile came to Alpha's face and he nodded vigorously.
"Ferry good szen," Tintenflecks spoke up with a quite a bit more enthusiasm than anyone else in the room. With that they tied Alpha's legs to the chair and asked him to test the bonds. After tugging with all his might Alpha simply shook his head at them, indicating that he could not pull free. Doctor Heartstrong watched as Tintenflecks moved his own chair around to be directly in front of Alpha's and pulled out a rather ancient looking watch from his pocket. It was one of those antique fold-up models with a, now tarnished, gold finish and attached to a chain. He levitated it up in-front of Alpha's face.
"Szis iz ferry nice watch don't you szink?" he made it twirl on its chain while watching Alpha's expression carefully.
"A … watch? It looks pretty enough, I suppose. What does it do exactly?" Alpha asked slightly confused. The doctors looked at each other for a moment before Tintenflecks turned back to Alpha and continued.
"Szat is … unimportant right szis minute, please if you would, keep your eyes on sze watch undt listen only to sze sound of mein foice."
"Uh … ok?"
"Let yourself feel relaxed, allow all of sze anxious energy to flow from your body …" Tintenflecks started in a slow, practiced voice, "Let all of sze muscles relax … feel your eyelids getting heffy, szis iz good, ferry good." He continued his line of suggestions until Alpha appeared to be asleep. At this point the doctor re-pocketed his watch carefully, while continuing with a new line of suggestions. "Continue to listen to sze sound of mein foice, szere is only peace now. Allow yourself to feel sze flow of time around you like sze wind as it gently caresses your mane on a cool day. And now sze wind is shifting, it slowly shtops and begins to blow in sze opposite direction. As it brushes past you imagine sze hours flowing in referse, watch as sze sun moofs backverds across sze sky returning gently to sze dawn only to giff way to sze darkness of sze prefious night. Let sze days flow pasht you as sze wind picks up its pace …"
Doctor Heartstrong caught himself nodding off and jerked back to wakefulness with a start. He rubbed his eyes thinking about the few hours he managed to sleep that morning. Deciding it was time to remedy that situation he moved silently to the door of the room, miming the act of drinking something in Tintenfleck's direction only to be curtly waved off without even a look. He shook his head and quietly pushed through the door, trying his best not to make any disturbing noises.
Tintenflecks continued as if nothing had happened, progressively following the methods he had developed from earlier versions of the memory regression technique. Every so often he would ask Alpha what he could see, but the first few attempts only resulted in Alpha giving a single word response like 'Darkness', or 'Nothingness'. Each time he would attempt to regress further. It was only when he had taken Alpha back to what should have been somewhere around a few years ago that something new happened.
"Vhat do you see Alpha?"
"… darkness … and fire, a great inferno!" Alpha started to get agitated, his breathing increasing rapidly.
"Listen to mein foice Alpha, sze fire cannot hurt you, it feels like sze warm water when you touch it …"
"… mmmm … warm …." Alpha calmed down considerably.
"What else do you see? What can you hear?"
"He's here … he's calling to me … he wants me to go over to him, I've done something wrong again." Alpha started to became uneasy again.
"Who is szis Alpha? Vhat have you done?"
"I don't want to go, he'll hurt me again," Alpha sniffed, his voice wavering badly now and his heart-rate increasing quickly, "You won't see it, but it hurts on the inside … he's coming!"
"Alpha listen to mein voice, szis pony cannot hurt you, he has no-"
"He's really mad this time! I have to get away!"
"Alpha listen to me, I am going to count to sree-"
"No! I can't get away!" Alpha was pulling at his bonds now in stark terror, "Don't come any closer! Please, I didn't do it on purpose!"
"Vhen I get to shree you vill return to sze present time and awaken."
Alpha started to bawl like a newborn foal at this point, his crying interrupted at regular intervals by a sudden jerking and clenching of his muscles, almost as if he was being struck repeatedly despite nothing coming into contact with him at all.
"Van, Two-"
Suddenly Alpha's body went completely limp and he was completely silent. His head drooped causing some more of his dull orange mane to fall over his face.
"Sree!" Tintenflecks exclaimed with a slight panic to his voice, clapping his fore hooves together for emphasis. He regarded Alpha's form worriedly, noticing the adverse change as he now sat there breathing very slowly as if in deep sleep. Tintenflecks reached over to Alpha tentatively but stopped when he noticed a very low mumbling. He instead bent closer to listen.
"… controlled begets power. Power harnessed becomes absolute." Alpha droned barely audible. This time Tintenflecks reached out intending to wake Alpha with a gentle shake, but before he could even twitch, a bright yellow burst of light caused him to cover his eyes instead. When he was able to see again he immediately noticed the rope lying loosely on the floor beneath Alpha's chair. He brought his gaze up further only to recoil in shock as he realized the opposite chair was empty. He looked around the room frantically after jumping out of his own chair, but it was only after seeing no other pony standing on the floor that he looked up.
And there he was … although Tintenflecks didn't recognize the now ethereal flame that was Alpha's mane. Nor did he notice the small horn before, glowing with its transparent yellow along with the rest of Alpha as he kept himself levitated in the air while staring at his fore hooves with an annoyed expression.
"This is going to be a problem." Alpha said to himself with a much more confident voice than Tintenflecks had ever heard from him.
"Alpha? Do you … are you alright?"
Alpha simply glared down at the doctor with blazing eyes, his focus seemed to be elsewhere; the memories of the past twenty-four hours flicking by in only a few seconds. Then his eyes narrowed in thought before his head jerk toward the door as if he'd heard something.
In the blink of an eye Alpha landed next to the doctor and grabbed his head between his fore hooves.
"Vhat are you-" he began, more than a little afraid now.
"Shhh …" Alpha moved one hoof over Tintenflecks' mouth as the hoof still at his temple began to glow brightly.