//------------------------------// // 4: To Be, Or Not To Be // Story: My Own Flesh and Blood // by NioFox //------------------------------// To Be, Or Not To Be The thunderous crash shook the entire hollowed-out tree that was Ponyville's library. Twilight Sparkle burst out of one of the larger piles of books strewn around the entire ground floor of the structure that also passed for her home as she sat upright. Her eyes were bloodshot and her mane more resembled a controlled demolition than anything else, rouge hairs sticking out at every conceivable angle, as if there was an army hidden beneath the mass of fibers, sticking their weapons out of whole creased sections, while others were splayed out like a fan. There was another less severe thump at the door just before an envelope slid beneath the door. Had Twilight been a little more than slightly coherent she would probably have guessed that Derpy the mail mare had just added a tad more character to the previously blemish free exterior of her front door as she delivered a single envelope, which promptly slid under the door. Stretching with a yawn that could swallow the cosmos, Twilight somehow managed to get to her feet without tripping over the uneven clutter adorning the normally pristine floor; weeks of practice from previous all-nighters finally starting to pay off. "Spi-" she croaked before slamming her mouth shut, eyes fully open now, a bit too wide. 'Bathroom' she thought sheepishly. 'A voice like that could probably have vanquished Nightmare Moon all by itself!' She hobbled up the stairs and through a door. A smaller pile of books began to rustle as gargling sounds started to emerge from the bathroom. Spike slowly shook the randomly assorted reading material off himself, eyes still closed and drooling slightly. "Mommy?" he mumbled absently rubbing his eyes. "Spike can you get that mail at the door?" gurgled Twilight, still in the process of fixing her parched throat. "Not mommy," Spike retorted with a sigh. Twilight felt a pang of sorrow, just barely catching his retort, even though she knew it was not meant to be taken seriously. "From the desk of doctor Heartstrong, Poneyville General Hospital," read off Spike in his most formal voice, "Dear miss Twilight Sparkle, it appears my fears were well-founded. It would be best if we spoke in person. Please come to see me at your earliest convenience" he ended, turning the letter over in his claws and then poking around in the envelope again in case he missed something. "Sounds pretty important Twi, are you-" he called giving up his search. Twilight appeared next to him in a whirlwind of loose pages and scrolls. She snatched the letter out of Spike's claws with her magic and started to read it herself, eyes rapidly combing the rather brief compilation of words. "Oh dear" she said curtly after re-reading the letter for the third time before tripping over a tall stack of tomes on her way to the front door. "Uh, Twilight?" Spike spoke up. She looked at him quickly as she got up and groaning. "Spike there's no ti-" she stopped herself when she noticed Spike pointing at his head. Between the bit of morning fog still trapped in her head and the present level of distress she seemed to be experiencing, Twilight did not understand at first and gave him a quizzical look. "Your mane" he mouthed at her, grimacing as he really got a good look at it. She levitated a hand-mirror over to her face from a random shelf. She made a sound of disgust as she grabbed a brush, opened the door and donned her saddle bag, all in the same magical fashion as with the mirror. "Spike get a head start on cleaning this up, I still have to put the finishing touches on my paper when I get back!" she called, marching through the door at a gallop. "Twilight look out-" Spike yelled from the doorway, a little too late. 'Ugh' he thought recoiling with a grimace borne out of empathy. 'One Derpy is more than enough!' Ponyville General Hospital Doctor Heartstrong stood lop-sided in the ward with its solitary occupant. His back right leg was in a sling and a band-aid plastered just above his right eye, surprisingly seeming almost as worse for wear as his patient. His attire was creased and dirty with sweat stains showing through in key areas and his mane was only hastily patted down. "Can you stand?" the doctor asked, the confusion on his face was palpable. The fact that this pony was able to sit up was the first bit of shock for the morning, but it was only when he managed to examine the remaining wounds that he really started gawking. "I can try …" said the pony in front of him as it sat with its hind legs hanging over the side of the bed, fore-hooves reaching extended backward to prop it up right. It slowly slid off the bed, testing the ground as if it were possible that there could be quicksand instead of the solid hard-wood floor beneath it. It took a whole minute, but finally the young stallion was on his feet and no longer wobbling unsteadily. A smile breached his impassive expression as he realized his accomplishment considering what the doctor had let on about just how bad a condition he was in when he was brought in. "This … this is good … right?" asked what could easily have been mistaken for a pegasus, even with his wings still in bandages. The doctor made an exasperated noise before replying, "Good? Son we weren't sure if you would ever wake up when they brought you in!" At that the pony's gaze was cast down to the floor, the same serene expression returning before becoming one of slight depression. "I … I don't remember what happened … I don't remember anything at all … is that good?" he asked not bothering to look back up, knowing at least the answer to that question. The doctor sighed. "It's … well this is to be expected with the damage you sustained to the head," he ventured in hopes of reassuring the oddly calm pony, "Do you at least remember your name?" The young stallion looked around the room for a few moments as if it might help sort out the muddle of grey that resembled anything close to actual memories. "… Rrrralabrlthhhh" he started. "Well Rala … brolath? Did I get that ri-" "No, I … it's- I can almost … right on the tip of my tongue … I just can't seem to … Riiiigah-bleh … " he tried again, ending up with his tongue stuck out. "Hello mister Rigley!" Twilight Sparkle burst through the door panting with a security pony in tow. "Sir I tried to tell her that she couldn't-" began the guard, but was promptly stopped with a raised fore-hoof from the doctor, his eyes never leaving the current bandaged wing he was scrutinizing. "Its fine Night Stick, I asked her to come in this morning" he said dismissively. The dark blue hoof let go of Twilight's tail as Night Stick got back to his feet in a hurry, apologizing one too many times before leaving, his neon yellow tail twitching nervously on his way out the door. "Not Rig- argh! I can't remember!" the patient exclaimed in frustration, "Can I lay back down now, this is getting a bit uncomfortable" he added starting to sound depressed again. "Oh yes of course! Sorry about that, this is just so … fascinating!" "What's that doctor?" asked Twilight making her way over to the bed as its previous occupant climbed back in, grimacing now and again as bruised areas made contact here and there. "Miss Twilight I'm so glad you are here. I should probably fill you in on what happened last night- err … early this morning" Roughly eight hours earlier Doctor Heartstrong was sent careening into one of the beds and its nearby monitoring equipment, a decently heavy E. K. G. walloping him over the head as it fell off its stand. He got out a grunt of pain as he realized something had definitely gone wrong with his leg. He brushed a hoof over the quickly growing bump on his head and looked at it. A small streak blood was barely visible in the once more dark room. He was still breathing heavily from the jarring experience that had just occurred as he pulled himself up into a limp, squinting at the crumpled form of his patient against the opposite wall, the bed he was previously laying on askew as if he had clipped it before coming to rest as he was now. The doctor became aware of a stifled whimpering coming from the doorway and looked back to see one of the nurses curled up in a fetal position, pin-prick pupils set up her massive eyes and biting down on the hoof stuck in her mouth. He limped over to the door and looked up and down the corridor, not spotting the other two caregivers that were previously around. "Nurse … nurse …" he tried at first, "Nurse Joy!" he almost bellowed shaking the cyan mare briskly. She slowly removed the hoof from her mouth and with ragged breaths attempted a response. "Y-y-y-y-" she stuttered In terror. "Nurse get up, it's okay! I'm fine- look at me!" he whispered harshly. "D-doctor?" she stammered, finally beginning to calm down. "Can you stand? I need you to give me a hand over here, the patient has fallen off his bed" "N-no! Please I-" she jumped at first, "please don't make me go in there doctor!" She seemed to be on the verge of tears. "Oh for crying out lou- look, just … go get an orderly for me, I need help moving him, I don't feel strong enough to use my horn right now." She nodded thankfully and quickly turned to leave. "Oh and please get those other two that were with you and report to my office when you're done, I need to have a word with all of you about what happened here" "Y-yes, of c-course doctor" she said before disappearing down the hallway, glad to get as far away from that room as possible. Sighing again, doctor Heartstrong stood back up slowly, grimacing in pain as he accidently put weight on his injured leg. He limped back over to his patient, only a tad apprehensive now. He had heard of sleepwalking unicorns doing strange things with their magic before … but this was a bit more than he had bargained for. Leaning down to examine the mostly bandaged pony he cursed himself for not turning on the light while he was still near the switch at the door. He probed very gently at areas he knew were especially bad only to be surprised by the lack of blood that should have been staining the freshly applied bandages. He hooked one on the edge of his hoof and lifted it carefully. 'Horsefeathers, I could really use some-" he was cut off as the light came on and a relatively alto voice spoke up behind him. "Is everything alright down here?" the voice asked. The doctor looked back briefly to see a slender security pony standing in the doorway with a concerned look on his face. "Ah finally, I was starting to think we weren't paying you ponies enough! Give me a hand here" he said, positioning himself carefully to attempt a lift. "I'm not sure I'm qualified to-" began the obviously younger stallion before being cut off as he trotted over to the doctor's side. "Don't worry son, he's not as bad as it looks, you don't have to worry about hurting him" the doctor reassured him. "Yea but-" "What's your name son?" "Night Stick … sir" "Look mister Stick, if anything happens I'll take full responsibility, okay?" And with a curt nod from the nervous stallion they hoisted the patient's still unconscious form back onto the bed, setting it back into its original position while they were at it. "Thanks son. Now see if you can clean up that mess a bit," the doctor motioned in the direction of the fallen equipment he had escaped from only a few moments ago, "don't worry too much about where it should all go, the orderly will take care of that, but make sure there's no broken glass or anything laying around. I really don't need more anymore work on my hooves right now." Doctor Heartstrong grimaced as he absent-mindedly came down on his bad leg again while pivoting back around the bed to examine his patient further. He unwrapped what should have been a minor scrape only to find perfectly unbroken skin, though the fur her not yet grown back over the spot leaving clear evidence of what had previously been a gradually scabbing-over cut. Both puzzled and extremely curious now, the doctor unwrapped a slightly more severe injury and examined the area with similar results; perplexing to say the least. By the time the orderly he had sent for entered the room he was almost tearing the bandages from most of the patient's body. "Doctor! This is highly irregular!" the mare all but screeched from behind him. "You're telling me- come take a look at this!" Doctor Heartstrong indicated what had been a particularly bad area of the patient's chest. "Just an hour ago this was area here was missing most of the skin!" "With all due respect sir, perhaps you should go home and get some rest, today has obviously been a long one for you" the orderly said after a particularly awkward silence. He was about to protest when he remember the need for secrecy about the patient's … odd circumstances. "Yes yes of course, you're probably right" he said nervously, realizing he had almost made things a lot worse for himself. "Could you see to it that he is hooked back up to the monitors for me? It seems they became detached when he fell out of bed during the night." He turned to leave with a passing glance at Night Stick as he was lifting the heavy E.K.G. monitor back up to its stand, a dent in the screen but otherwise unharmed … unlike his head. "Oh and could you help this young stallion clean up this mess, I'm sure he has his rounds to return to" he added, looking back at the orderly as she had just begun to re-attach the probes. "Of course doct- oh my! You might want to take care of that" she said indicating to a spot just above her right eye. "Yes well … I'll be in my office a while longer if anypony needs me" he said, slowly walking down the still deserted and gloomy hallway, deep in thought. 'This is not good … he really is an alicorn! What … what does this mean? Maybe I can get a new job in Fillydelphia when they fire me for participating in a major cover-up' his thoughts took a less-than-rational turn. When he got to his office doctor Heartstrong was slightly surprised at first, having forgotten his previous orders to have the three caregivers meet him there. They stood around nervously; the superstition hanging in the air was almost tangible. The doctor snorted in disgust before starting to speak. "Now I know what you think you saw in there, but I assure you there is a perfectly logical explanation for that. Tomorrow I'm having an expert come in to investigate the incident and we'll all be able to breathe easier once we know what's-what. In the meantime I want you all to forget what you saw in there-" "But-" started one of the more vocal ponies. "No buts! You will not breathe a word of this to anypony under any circumstance. I will have no unfounded rumors spreading around this respectable institution, or Ponyville for that matter! Is that clear?" "But-" "IS THAT CLEAR?" he almost bellowed, the lack of sleep evident in his unusually short temper. The three ponies looked at him with a renewed fear in their eyes. He could only imagine the rumors of how he had been possessed by some malevolent spirit or something going around Ponyville by morning. "Look … I'm sorry- it's late, I'm extremely exhausted and it's obviously affecting my judgment. Please understand that the last thing we need is reporters getting under-hoof trying to find some kind of story out of nothing but superstition and old mare's tales. I really like my job here and I don't want to put that at risk by inviting scandalous news articles to ruin the good reputation we have built up over the years. I'm asking you all, as a friend, not as your superior, please just keep this between yourselves?" They all nodded in assent and left the room shortly after the doctor dismissed them for the night. He collapsed in his armchair, glad to ease the strain on his three tired legs. He was lost in thought again, mostly daydreams about being dragged from the building by Night Stick and some other security pony. Before he knew it he had drifted off into strange and unpleasant dreams. "So if I have this straight … his wounds were healed in only a few hours and … only those present in this room know about … the horn?" Twilight Sparkle whispered the last part of her question after doctor Heartstrong finished his story. "Yes and yes- well … not quite … his most severe injuries are still on the mend. His wings and rib are now simply fractures and the stitches I used to keep his … you know what … in place were taken out earlier when I realized he no longer needed them but he says it still hurts when he touches it. Whatever it was that happened this morning, while incredible, does not seem to be without its limits however. His blood-sugar levels were so low that when I was awoken earlier the concerned nurse informed me that she had to up the dose on the I.V. drip far beyond the normally recommended levels. We only just-" "Awright, clear out you lot!" came a loud and heavily accented voice from behind them. "Oi! We'll be 'aving none uv that wish-wash at breakfast! Bugger off now, the patient needs 'is vit'als!" A faded burgundy colored mare with a dingy grey mane and particularly large and uneven front teeth protruding from her mouth stepped through the door wheeling a tray of hospital food into the room. She ploughed right through the middle of them and parked the tray next to the occupied bed. "Come on luv, we got-ah get yuh right 'an beh-ah" she said in a motherly tone, setting up the special stand over the bed and laying the tray on it. "Please forgive Bedside Manor, she's not from around Ponyville and is starting to dote a little in her advancing years but she's the most passionate caregiver we've ever had here," the doctor explained in a whisper, looking back over at the pair from the doorway, "all of our patients love her to bits … and not to mention she's taken quite a shine to our young friend there" he added with a smile as he watched her trying explain how to use a spoon before actually feeding him a few first mouthfuls as example. "WOW, this is so good!" came an uncharacteristically exuberant outburst from the bed's occupant. "What is this called? It's amazing!" Everyone in the room stared in disbelief as the young stallion started shoveling the usually less than palatable broth that was fed to patients just coming off a drip. He quickly abandoned the spoon, which he still had trouble using, and picked up the bowl, gulping down the rest of it in less than a few seconds. "Can I have mo-" he started with the same enthusiastic voice before dialing it back to a timid low. "May I have more?" he smiled sheepishly. "We'll 'av yah stuffed big as plum luv, jest you wait" said Bedside Manor, smiling happily to herself as she replace the tray and wheeled the stand back out of the room. "Gee, I wish I could cheer up all my patients with a simple bowl of soup. Do you remember anything about what you normally eat?" asked the doctor, his thoughts returning to his duties. "Ummm … no? But if I'm sure I would have remembered if I ever tasted anything that good!" he ended with a grin. "Must've been a hard life … where-ever you came from … " Twilight muttered to herself with a pained expression on her face. She had tasted hospital food once … it was … far from stellar, to put it nicely. "Hey, I remember you!" he piped up pointing at Twilight, his mood quite a bit more energetic now that he had something enjoyable to look forward to. Doctor Heartstrong's expression changed to that of relief and hope, while Twilight's only became more puzzled. "But I've never met you in all my life" she said. "Well, I mean, that is to say, I remember your voice. You were the one who tried to comfort me when I was panicking as some weirdo was lifting me out of that crater yesterday right?" he was grinning while he spoke until he realized Twilight expression had deadpanned. "That weirdo was me," she said with just a hint of annoyance, "unless you think it would have been better that we left you out there, as bad as you were." He was blushing in embarrassment and rubbing the back of his head with one hoof, the doctor's hopeful expression falling as he realized no progress was made at all. "Eheh," he gulped, "uhhh … let me try again," he ventured, hopping out of the bed with unnaturally renewed vigor. "Thank you for saving my life" he said, bowing as if Twilight were royalty. She blushed a little at the gesture feeling completely self-conscious even with just the three of them in the room. "N-now now, there's no need for that. I'm sure you would have done the same thing had our roles been reverse" she said indicating for him to stand back up. It was at that point that she noticed the marking on his flank. "That … looks very familiar …" she said slowly in a distracted manner, reaching out as if touching the pattern would help to jog her memory. He side-stepped her touch awkwardly, bumping into a table and knocking it over in the process. Various small medical instruments were scattered across the floor and he quickly started to pick them up, willing to do anything that would divert attention from his embarrassing clumsiness. Twilight's expression deadpanned again, "When I said I wouldn't hurt you yesterday, I meant ever you know" she said. "I'm sorry … I just … " he tried and failed to explain. "Yes he seems to have some implicit memories related to touch, unpleasant ones as you can see. It took me half an hour just to get him to relax enough for me to check his wings. Where ever he came from … he was not treated well, that much is evident" said the doctor with a grim expression. For a while there was only the noise of small object dropping back into their original location on the table. "And you say you can't remember your name?" asked Twilight now in a voice riddled with sadness. She had been trying to imagine just what he must have gone through to shrug away from the touch of another pony like that. Although the details were just about impossible for her to conjure, she still had a rough idea and it stirred some very strong sympathetic feelings within her. "It should be the last thing one would forget, you know? And yet …" his voice had returned to its original emotionless state. "Centus … Center … Centauri! Alpha Centauri! That's it!" This time it was Twilight everyone was staring at in confusion while she smiled proudly. "Wha-" "The marking on your flank represents the binary star known as Alpha Centauri! It was previously thought to be the third brightest star in the night sky up until recently, but with the aid of very specialized astrometric magic a great unicorn astronomer by the name of Constellus Huddle was able to discern the presence of separate solar bodies orbiting each other!" Twilight finished one of her usual almost-as-if-read-straight-from-a-book monologues. The young stallion was sitting up on his haunches, contorting himself oddly trying to get a better look at the dancing fireball pattern, rubbing at it experimentally as if he thought it might be a practical joke painted there while he was asleep. "So how does it feel to have the third brightest star as your cutie mark?" Twilight asked with a grin. "My what now?" he looked at her with a blank expression, still contorted to the point of absurdity. By this point the doctor's jaw was just about on the floor as he contemplated how much recovery had occurred in the space of only ten hours. "Your cutie mark, you know, the mark that you get when you discover that certain something that makes you special." "Huh? Sounds weird" he said dismissively, resuming his previous circus act and poking at his flank. "Well that's the only way I know of that a pony gets a mark like that, and I've studied quite a bit on the topic. Hey … we need something to call you- at least … until you regain your memory. What do you think about Alpha Centauri? Or Alpha for short?" "Uh, I guess so. Sounds kinda neat, sure why not?" Alpha had gotten bored and stood back up at this point. He went over to the window and looked outside. "Why is everything so … colorful?" has asked with a tone of deep confusion. "What do you mean Alpha?" asked Twilight, walking over to the window beside him, careful not to get too close. In the distance were various buildings, trees and the road. Nothing in the scene looked particularly interesting one way or the other. Alpha just stared for a moment longer before speaking, "Oh right that's me isn't it? Sorry still getting used to the name. I mean … I dunno, everything is … so green, and yellow, and blue and- and … well just amazing!" "What did you think you would see?" "… something … orange … and red … and more orange. Is that weird?" "I certainly can't think of a place where those might be the only colors to see … a volcano maybe? But even then the sky is always blue …" "Blue … mmmmmm … it's okay I guess. And why does everything smell so nice?" he switched subjects suddenly. Twilight gave him an incredulous look before rolling her eyes and looking back out the window. "Oh come on, is there nothing to smell where you come from either? We're in a hospital for Celestia's sake-" "Celestia …" Alpha said in a low hiss. "So you at least remember our Pri-" she stopped herself finally getting a good look at him. His eyes were had lost their happy glow and his stare was now so unwavering as it pierced some poor non-descript cloud that she honestly thought it would burst into flames. And then she noticed it, something she was not even sure was possible. From somewhere within the depths of his chest she could hear a low rumbling and as she listening closer she realized he was growling!