Genealogy - (or the Mating Habits of Nocturnes Pegasi)

by Georg


Chap. 12 - Love Hurts

Genealogy - (or The Mating Habits of Nocturnes Pegasi)
Love Hurts


“I’m sorry.”

“Now cut that out, right now.” Laminia tucked in the wing-slot of Pumpernickel’s jacket and stood back to admire her design. The rest of the various fillies and ponies had all left the library fairly quickly after Luna’s dismissal, allowing her to show Princess Luna her best work. Unfortunately, as she explained repeatedly, it had to be displayed on Lumpy, because it probably would have hung like a tent over one of her other thinner Night Guards.

“Fit for a—whatever you are. As you can see, Your Highness, I’ve taken several steps to ensure an ease of dressing, although any final design would incorporate more measures. Hopefully even the least coordinated of the Night Guard will have no problems with dressing and undressing; even Lumpy here managed everything but the cufflinks.” Ignoring her organic dressmaker dummy’s grumbling, she turned him to face the library lighting. “What do you think?”

“I think I may just be tempted to join the Guard,” said Spike. “That shade of purple would look really nice on me, don’t you think?”

“Well, I think he looks very handsome and refined,” said Twilight Sparkle in a guarded voice. “Not at all the way he looked when he threw that pony against the wall last night and broke up my shelves.”

“Bill us,” said Laminia a bit too sharply.

“You threw a pony against the wall last night?” asked Princess Luna in a very dry voice. “Might I ask why?”

Pumpernickel paused with his mouth open to reply, until Laminia cut him off. “One of my family members was being disrespectful. Your loyal guard simply asked him to rephrase his statement.”

“While holding him two hooves off the ground,” added Twilight. “Although he seemed less concerned about the insults to your Hoofmaiden, than to your honor, Princess Luna.”

“Oh really?” Luna looked at the Pumpernickel with one raised eyebrow. “I am given to believe that duels over matters of honor had been made illegal several centuries ago. Did you think to renew this ancient and noble tradition that had caused so many injuries to our guardsponies over those years?”

“No.” Pumpernickel glowered at all of them. “I don’t like to hurt others. That’s why I put on this costume over at the boutique before I came back. It’s a lot like my Royal Guard armor. While I’m wearing it, I represent something. Without it, I’m just me. As a guard, I could resist the urge to beat...” He trailed off and glanced at Laminia before turning his back. “I’m sorry.”

Laminia carefully patted him on the flank. “You are forgiven, my brave and fearless guardian. Besides, Dad’s kind of a jerk anyway.”

“Dad?” Pumpernickel tensed up like a steel beam. “I almost—”

“Adoptive father, remember?” She smacked him on the bare flank, and then rubbed her sore hoof. “Besides, he really deserved it. Heck, I was just about ready to kick him in the head when you showed up. Best thing the Pins ever did when they adopted me: steel shoes for the stone floors in the castle, and self-defense lessons. You probably saved him a concussion.”

“Somehow I don’t think he’ll thank me for that,” Pumpernickel remarked bitterly. “Can we please get on with it? I’d like to get working on whatever Twilight Sparkle would like to get started on tonight. I need the distraction.”

“Hm.” Princess Luna appeared deep in thought, and bent her head from side to side to get a better look at Pumpernickel in his uniform. “Yes, I can see. By the end of the week, I would like you to begin work on making a final version of this uniform, plus an informal off-duty version. Something light, on the order of a vest with the same cap. Perhaps you can find inspiration while you are reviewing your history. Ten centuries of creativity should be able to produce something useful. You are all dismissed.”

The Princess of the Night turned to leave without another word, passing out the door and to her waiting chariot which lifted off into the night air in a flurry of dragon-like wings.

Pumpernickel sagged down into a sitting position and blew out a long-held breath. “Whew. I’m glad that’s over.” The glare that Twilight Sparkle poured in his direction finally began to soak in. “It’s not over, is it?”

“No it isn’t.” The purple unicorn’s intense gaze did not let up for a moment. “Spike. There’s a job I need you to do over at Rarity’s for a few minutes. Go do it, please.”

“Sure, Twilight. Um. What is it?” The little dragon sat patiently, waiting for an answer. Then began to fidget. “Oh yeah, that. Well, I better be getting to it. Whatever it is. I’ll just leave you two alone. Three. Later!” The pitter-patter of little draconic feet vanished off into the distance and the library door slammed behind him.

“That was awfully cruel, Twilight,” said Laminia. “The little guy—”

“Hush. You’re next.” She blinked a bit and sat back, but never took her penetrating eyes off Pumpernickel. “There’s something I have to hear from you, if you are going to be helping me for the next week. Can I get your word that you will be honest with me? If not, I can’t trust you, and you can leave, right now.”

“You have my word as a Royal Guard, that I shall speak truthfully to you. I hereby swear by Luna and my family it shall be so.” He looked around. “My family’s Book of Tradition is around here somewhere if you need me to swear on it too.”

“Good enough. Last night after you came into my library, and smashed Laminia’s father into the wall—“

“Adopted father,” mumbled Laminia.

“—you seemed to change into an entirely different pony just a few minutes later when you returned. Now I’ve done some talking around town. Raindrops seems to think you were holding back a lot during your fight, even though I don’t agree with why the two of you were fighting anyway.”

“Well, I didn’t want to hurt her—”

“But Redoubtable says you did exactly the same thing at the Academy, and it almost got you kicked out. He says you never, and that’s the exact word he used, never, fought to win. They tried every underhanded trick in the book on you, put you up against every different skill level of opponent, day after day, and you always just barely lost. Do you remember Cadet Hammerlock?”

“Yes, every time the weather changes. I think he cracked a bone in my shoulder.”

“Do you remember how long you lasted in the ring with him? Seven minutes.”

“Six and a half. It felt more like seven hours.” Pumpernickel frowned. “Although after he beat me up, the combat instructors eased up on me until after graduation.”

“That’s because nopony lasted as much as five minutes against Special Operations Combat Sergeant Hammerlock before. They slipped you a ringer. The Princess told me so today.” She tapped a scroll with one hoof. “The instructors at the Academy wrote her five different times, requesting permission to kick you out. They never had a Night Pegasus fail the Academy without dying, and they looked back in the archives all the way back to Luna. She suggested setting you against him… well, as much as she ever just suggests anything. What I’m saying, is you’re holding back something, and have been holding it since before you put on the armor and took your oath. It changes your sometimes violent behavior, and unless you tell me what it is, I can’t trust you any more around either myself or my baby dragon. So would you mind telling me what that is, please?”

Pumpernickel sat down with a thump and picked at the silver piping on his uniform while carefully not looking at either of the two mares in the room. “I-I hit my sister. When I was very young, I was all hooves and knees. I had just been adopted and still didn’t quite know my own strength, I’ve always been a little strong for my size. We were playing, and they were holding me down and tickling me and… I kicked her.”

He fidgeted with the piping some more, finally dropping his hoof to the floor and laying down. “It took weeks for Brook to come back from the hospital, and nopony ever really told me what happened there. They Named me Pumpernickel at that point. They said it was an honor, but I knew better. I was so young I can’t even remember what my old name was.

From then on, it was always ‘Be careful playing with Pumpernickel, he’s clumsy’ or ‘Now don’t hurt anypony, Pumpernickel.’ I really didn’t want to go through Royal Guard training at first, but it’s Traditional. At the time, I wished I had never gone to the Academy, but now...”

He stood up and brushed off the uniform with a sense of pride, “When I’m wearing my armor, I’m somepony else. I’m Pumpernickel of the Royal Guard, not the nameless colt who almost killed his sister. That pony doesn’t exist any more. He was a bad pony.”

The Night Guard cringed and looked away, his voice almost inaudible. “I had almost forgotten about him until I felt Slipstream’s neck under my hooves. I was so filled with cold anger I could have killed him. It would have been so easy. Like breaking a twig.”

“But you didn’t.” Twilight Sparkle looked at him compassionately. “It doesn’t quite sound like a little bit of a split-personality, more like—“

“A guilty conscience, making him a glutton for punishment.” Laminia got up and stretched, rubbing up against Pumpernickel as she began to circle around him. “You never dodged or blocked my kicks, not even once. You never even tried. I thought it was just incompetence until I saw you and Raindrops fighting. Now I see you just like getting beaten up by mares. You think it makes up for the mistakes you made when you were just a pup. You’re trapped in shackles you created yourself.”

“Not entirely.” Twilight Sparkle nodded at the two of them. “I’ve seen him unleash himself twice, not just once. Most recently when he busted your father up against my library shelves, but I was watching when he hammered Redoubtable into the ground and broke open Rarity’s front door. Both were times when he was protecting you.”

Laminia froze as Twilight’s cool violet eyes met hers, looking so much like Princess Celestia’s compassionate gaze. “The first time, you kicked him in the head as a thank you for his actions. From what Rainbow Dash has been telling me, you did it again, multiple times after he was wounded protecting you in that stupid little cloud game. She says you were both acting screwy after you nearly killed him with a lightning bolt, that you never apologized and he never got mad at you for it. I don’t even pretend to understand why you would kick him in the head, but you always seemed to be careful that his helmet was on, and always seemed to do it when he was getting too close to you.

“I think that’s the key. You get evasive when anypony gets close to you, and when anypony starts to show signs that they might like you, you react by doing anything you possibly can to drive them away. You seem so determined to keep everypony at a distance. How many friends do you have?”

“I have lots of friends! I have the Pins, and...” Lamina trailed off.

“Me,” muttered Pumpernickel.

“Friends don’t kick other friends in the head,” snapped Twilight.

“No, friends have more painful ways to hurt you,” snarled Laminia. “Friends take the trust you give them, and twist it into hurtful weapons. I’ve tried to give trust before, and every time I’ve been kicked in the teeth. Well, I’ve found a way to fix that. If you don’t give them any trust, they are powerless against you. I don’t need friends! I’ve done just fine without them!”

“That’s not true!” Twilight jumped up and began pacing back and forth. “Friends are the most precious gift of all. It isn’t just giving some trust and getting some back like bits at the bank, it’s far more. It grows and fills your heart until you want to make friends with everypony, even those too stubborn to admit they need friends. Don’t you understand?”

“Yes, I think I do.” Laminia got up and started walking towards the front door. “You’re going to keep bugging me with this stupid friendship thing until I give in, and let you get my mind all twisted up. Then the next time I trust somepony again, they’ll rip my heart out and it will hurt ten times as much.”

“Now that’s—”

“Hold on, Miss Sparkle,” interrupted Pumpernickel. “Just let her go. She’s having some issues and just needs some space.”

“You!” Laminia whirled around in front of the door and stalked back towards Pumpernickel who stood his ground solidly. “You just keep out of this! You think you’re so fragile and guilty, grow a pair and stick up for yourself! I don’t need your help either, you just screw up anything you get your hooves on, you just stay away from me! Do you hear me! STAY AWAY FROM ME! I don’t need anything from you, I don’t need your trust and I certainly don’t need your lo—” She choked up, turned and dashed out the library door, slamming it as she fled.