//------------------------------// // Chapter 9 - Pyro the Hydro // Story: The Stuff of Legends // by Harvs //------------------------------// Chapter 9 Pyro the Hydro Two horizontal swipes and a vertical of the enormous masamune and about twenty metal bars were severed from the cage. Sephiroth sheathed his weapon and turned to the others. "Is everyone alright?" He asked, genuinely concerned for his comrades. "We're fine Sephy." Vinyl said, making sure her bass cannon was still functional. "It's just this thing that I'm worried about." "Don't worry about that." Sephiroth said, helping her out of the cell where they had been held. "If there's any damage, GLaDOS can fix it when we get out of here." With no metal bars hindering their views, the group was able to see where exactly they were. Outside of the moldy cell that Tristan had teleported them to, they were greeted by a beautiful underwater paradise. Temples built from stone, professionally crafted at that. Little fishes were carved into the stones to create an 'underwatery' feel. And speaking of little fishes, the city was surrounded by dozens, hundreds of schools of what seemed like thousands of types of fish. Just swimming around, eating, and being generally useless to society as a whole. "What is this place?" Vinyl asked, pushing her amp along with the two foods on top. "I'm not sure." Sephiroth said, examining the city. "But it appears we are underwater." He pointed two fingers upward. "And it looks like there is some kind of barrier keeping the water out." The group looked up to see transparent walls that seemed to move as water would. Sephiroth walked to one of the jiggling walls and reached his gloved hand out to touch it. The barrier resisted slightly at first, but as he pushed a bit more, his hand passed through. The cold water on his hand instinctively made the angel pull back into the safety of the giant bubble, as the barrier closed without allowing the water inside. "Interesting." He muttered. "What kind of magic is this?" "I think we have bigger concerns right now Sepherroo." Yakko chimed in. "Like how are we gonna get out of here?" "Yeah, and where's the Pyro?" Vinyl added. "Calm down, calm down everyone." Sephiroth gently said. "I don't know how we're going to get out of this one, nor do I know where he is." He looked all around him for a solution, but there was nothing to aid them. "Well," Yakko began, strolling forward. "I guess we'll just wander around aimlessly looking for clues... again." He pulled out and began playing with his paddleball again as he whistled a tune with only two notes. "I..." Sephiroth thought about saying something against that idea, but he had nothing better. "Alright. Let's go." As the group trudged along through the abandoned city, Vinyl rolled her amp along, staying as close to Sephiroth as possible. She looked up and asked, "Do you think the Pyro's ok?" He met eyes with her, at least he assumed so since she was still wearing sunglasses, and said, "Of course I do. He's a moron, but he can look out for himself." He gave the best smile he could (barely a smile) and continued. "The best thing we can do right now is keep the rest of us alive. We have to look out for each other; Yakko, GLaDOS... even Latisha." "I agree." GLaDOS added. "I just have one question. Who's GLaDOS?" ***** Meanwhile, somewhere deep below the surface of the lake in Hogwarts, the Pyro dove into the depths. With his new gear equipped, he drew oxygen from the tank on his back, allowing him to breathe while under the sea. He didn't know where he was heading, but he had a pretty good idea that if he kept swimming in a random direction, he'd find something eventually. He continued on, paying no heed to the fishes that swam by. Occasionally he got the urge to attempt to light them on fire. At one point he even reached for his flamethrower. but he knew that wouldn't do him much good. He continued on his monotonous trek to the bottom of the lake. As he submerged deeper and deeper into the darkness, he found it difficult to see even a foot in front of him. The only light came from his new weapon, and even then the red light was far too dim to see much of anything. After about thirty seconds of swimming, he became too exhausted to carry on and headed for a nearby alcove. Upon breaching the surface in the air pocket, he was greeted by a familiar friend; fire. A torch to be exact. Removing the oxygen mask, he ran over to the conveniently lit campfire and sat down next to it. He cupped his hands over the torch, warming them up to a toasty degree. Being underwater for almost a minute sure took its toll on the merc, and he enjoyed being reunited with the one thing that brought him comfort. The sound of footsteps behind him. He didn't turn until they became louder, then suddenly came to a halt. He turned to see several fish people. They were small in size, and had big, gaping mouths and lotsa sharp teeth. One of them held a spear, another held a staff, and the middle carried a flag with unintelligible markings painted in red. The four just stood/sat there in awkward silence for some time, before the middle fish extended his skinny webbed hand to the Pyro. "Mmmggrrll mmggrrll mmgl." He said, making the Pyro's speech seem like an actual language. The Pyro took the fish's small hand in his and shook it heartily. "Hmmph hmm hmmmph mm." As the gas jockey stood, his size frightened the spear wielder and he pointed the weapon at the intruder. The Pyro held his hands up and backed away so to not be poked. "Mmrrrgll! Mmrrrg mmrrrggglll llgmmgll!" The middle one scolded the frightened one, forcing his spear down. He went on in his own... unique language, hopefully explaining that the red suited man was not a threat. "Hmmph hmm hmmph mmph?" The Pyro asked, pointing to the exit and tilting his head. "Mmgrrll mm mmrrrll mmmggggllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll." The middle one shook his head. From what the Pyro could gather, they were not hostile creatures, rather they wanted to know who he was and why he was there. "Mmrggll mmrrrrgl." "Hmmph mm. Hmmph hmm hmm hmm hmmph phmm hmmph." "Mmmrggl rrgg rrg rrll rmmrrlg." "Hmm. Hmmph hmmphmm hmmph hmm hmmph hmm. Hmm hmm." "Mmmrrgll mmrr mmrrg grrr gmmrrgll." "Hmm? Hmmph mm?" "Mmrrgl?" "Hmm?" "Mmrrgglll! Mm mmrr mrrmrrgl!" The Pyro wasn't sure what he had said, but apparently, he had offended the fish people. They began backing him into a corner, weapons in fin. The one with the stave's fins began to glow a light blue aura that resembled lightning. Something bad was about to happen if he did not act fast. "... Hmmmmmmmmm..." "MMMGGGRRRLL MMRR! MMMRRRRGGGGLLL!" The middle one, his eyes fixated on the mercenary, pointed at him and the other two jumped at him. The Pyro rolled quickly to the left, stuck the landing, and pulled out his flamethrower. The fish people were no longer friendly with the Pyro, and vice versa. The spear wielder rushed at him again, jumping to impale the Pyro. The fish went sailing over his shoulder however, missing completely and hitting his face against the wall. He missed. Turning his attention away from the incompetent entree, the one with the staff began to cast what looked like a spell. While the Pyro had some experience in dealing with magicians, the fish was a far better wizard than Merasmus, as he lobbed a wave of electricity through the air. The spell hit the Pyro, dealing about 44 damage. Without a moment to spare, he got to his feet and jumped at the fish person, holding the trigger down the entire time. He roasted the enemy until he was nothing but a pile of fish sticks. He then proceeded to stomp on the fish sticks as he did not like them. "Hmm!" He called out angrily, scanning the cavern for the other fish. He looked to the corner where he had embarrassingly launched into, but only saw his spear. Suddenly, he felt as though someone threw a bowling ball at the back of his head. He was able to remain on his feet before hearing the murgles and gurgles of his unfriendly fishy foes. He struggled to get the unwanted company off of his back, but no success. The fish person just kept smashing away at the Pyro's head, trying to do as much damage as possible. One of the the fish person's punches hit the Pyro's mask just right, and suddenly his colorful world of happy rainbow sunshine rainbows was gone. A loud, high-pitched ringing overpowered the Pyro's hearing. With all his might, he heaved the fish off of his back and into the wall with a loud crack. He then fell to the ground, squinting his eyes behind his mask. The ringing became even louder before fading out into something worse: screams. Women, children, all of the ear-piercing screams he had forced to the darkest corners of his memory, were now crystal clear yet again. All of them dead by his hands. He burned their towns. Their homes. He left none alive. He saw images he had long since forgotten. Families begging him for mercy. And those same families, charred, hacked, and left to rot. He could barely breathe. He tried to get to his feet, but couldn't muster the strength. All the people he had killed. All the lives he had taken became too much for him to bear. He regretted ever making his beloved flamethrower. He remembered trying on multiple occasions to destroy it, but he could never bring himself to do it. There had to be an alternative. And sure enough, there was. A brilliant man, able to construct sentry guns and teleporters alike. Seeing his handiwork, the Pyro asked, rather begged him to find a solution. After much discussion, the man by the name of the Engineer agreed to build him a mask that would place the Pyro in a sort-of alternate world. One where he would be spreading joy, instead of despair. And so, the Pyro had found a way to cope with his addiction. Mann Co. saw his talent and hired him without a second thought. The perfect rage inducer to encourage the mercs to stop sucking. But over the years that the Pyro had spent under the employment of Helen and Saxton Hale, he had forgotten about the real world. He embraced his new sight as reality. His 'Pyrovision' was the only thing that was real to him now. All of the memories from before had been forgotten. Finally, the screams of his victims ceased. He looked up to see what he had done. He had taken two more lives. And he wouldn't have even known. He reached a hand behind his head and flipped a knob through his mask, switching Pyrovision back on. But the memories still remained, burning brighter than ever. But something was amiss. Two of the fish people lay dead in the cave, but where was the last one? There were three before, but he was nowhere to be found. The man rose to his feet, scanning all over for the flag carrier. After a while of searching, he found the flag fish. Only he didn't want to find him now. A massive armada of fish people blazed through the cavern towards him, all the while shouting at the top of their lungs. It was truly the most annoying sound in the world. The gas jockey quickly put the underwater breathy thing back on and grabbed the rest of his stuff. Without a second thought, he dove back underwater, swimming as fast as he could away from the tidal wave of fish people. ***** "So tell me Miss," Yakko started, dressed in a long white coat and glasses, holding a notepad and pencil. "How do you feel?" The potato sat on a red sofa, most of which she didn't need, and replied. "I feel fine." "Then may I ask you some questions?" Yakko asked, tapping his lower lip with the pencil. "By all means." "What is your name?" "Caroline." the potato said. "Does the name 'GLaDOS' mean anything to you?" "No. Not at all. Why do you ask?" "Interesting..." Yakko muttered, while drawing a U.F.O. on his notepad. "So what does this mean?" Sephiroth asked. "Well, physically she hasn't changed." Yakko hid the notepad from view. "It's something mentally wrong with her." "I beg your pardon?" Caroline spoke up from the couch. "What I'm trying to say," Yakko continued, paying no attention to his potato patient. "is that she doesn't think she's GLaDOS." The others tilted their heads. "What do you mean 'she doesn't think she's GLaDOS'?" Vinyl asked, raising her eyebrow. "I mean she doesn't think she's GLaDOS." Yakko said dryly, turning to the pony with an aggravated expression. "Which word didn't you understand? I can show you in the dictionary if you'd like." He pulled out an enormous book labeled 'Dicshunary' in shiny metallic words. "Well if she doesn't think she's GLaDOS," Sephiroth interrupted. "then who does she think she is?" "Iunno." Yakko shrugged. "She said her name was Caroline. But GLaDOS never mentioned a Caroline." "Who is this GLaDOS?" Caroline asked, growing impatient. "Do you mean our new disk operating system?" Thinking back, Sephiroth remembered that their tasty companion was in fact an operating system. "Yes." He said, turning back towards her. "A genetic lifeform of sorts." "Well that does sound familiar. I believe I heard Mr. Cave Johnson talking about something like that." Yakko gave the potato a look of disbelief, turns to you, and blows a kiss to the imaginary audience. "Goodnight everybody!" "Well then." Sephiroth started, picking the potato off of the couch and placing her on the amp. "There is some kind of connection between you and GLaDOS. I'm not sure what that connection is, but we'll never find out down here." He looked around for a moment, then spotted a hallway protected by the transparent water shields. "Let's try this way." The angel started down the hallway, keeping his hand on the hilt of his blade, ready for anything. Yakko followed close behind, playing with his paddleball, and Vinyl rolled her bass cannon behind them both, holding the two foods on top. It was a long hallway, though not much was in it. Just some broken pillars with ancient carvings and some pottery. Fish, little fish swam by outside. Sponges. The outside was filled to the brim with wildlife of all shapes and sizes. Often times, the group was fearful that a large animal would accidentally run into the structure. But there were no animals bigger than fishes, and the occasional shark to be seen. "Are we there yet?" Vinyl asked from the back. "No." Sephiroth answered, very blandly. "How far do we have to go?" Yakko added. "I don't even know. Stop asking." "My hooves are tired though, Sephy. We've been walking like this for I don't even know how long. Can't we just take a small break?" Vinyl asked. "If we take any breaks, we give Captain Planet the advantage." He stopped, looking back. Yakko ran smack-dab into the leader, and Vinyl into him. "Sephy?!" Vinyl said loudly. "What's the big idea-" "Shh!" Sephiroth shushed her, looking back and drawing his sword a bit. "Don't shush me!" She yelled. "Be quiet!" He whispered back. "Do you hear that?" The pony and dog perked their ears up, listening behind them. Eventually, the two picked up a faint cry for help... followed by a low rumbling. The sound became louder and louder, and eventually the group picked up the odor of rotten fish. They looked back to see what was making the sound. The corridor was so long and dark that they could barely make anything out. Until they could make out a red dot in the distance. Squinting their eyes, they couldn't believe what they were seeing. "HMM HMMMPH!" The Pyro cried out, running as fast as he possibly could. "Is that..." Yakko started, pausing and waiting a moment. "the Pyro?" "It is!" Vinyl exclaimed excitedly. "And it looks like he brought some company." Sephiroth said, drawing his sword. "Get behind me!" He yelled. The others, at this point, had no problems listening to him. Just then, the Pyro noticed his friends in the distance. He shifted his gaze to Vinyl's trusty amp and saw his beloved resting in blissful beauty. Suddenly, all of his troubles melted away. He felt like he could fly to his waifu. Time slowed down as he approached the amp. He reached both hands around to embrace the taco. He spun around, unaware of the blood of dead fish splattering all over the ground, walls, and ceiling. Sephiroth swung his masamune, killing three of the fish people at once, and discouraging the others from pursuing. But not for long. "If you two are done," Sephiroth said, looking at Latisha and the Pyro out of the corner of his eye. "I'd appreciate some help." The Pyro nodded, giving Latisha a quick kiss and then joining the others on the battlefield, his new weapon in hand. "It's good to see you again." Sephiroth slightly almost sort of smiled, readying his blade for another brutal swipe. The nine other fish people, charged without hesitation. Vinyl was the first to launch two musical discs at two of them. They fell to the ground, too dead to get up. "Nice one Vinyl." Sephiroth said, slicing another one in half with a vertical strike. "Leave it to me guys!" Yakko called out, holding a bucket of water. As three of the fish people neared him, he threw the bucket at the middle one, spraying all of them with water and halting the charge. The middle one held both fins on his face, staggering around a bit in pain. He almost fell once, but manage to regain his balance. He then removed his webbed hands from his face and said, "Mrrggl! Mmmrrll mrrglll!" "Sorry." Yakko apologized. Not long after, the Pyro jumped out from behind the dog, smashing the middle one in the face (again) with the Neon Annihilator, royally pwning him. The fish's body was lifted up a bit, as it evaporated into thin air. Seeing this, the other two fishes turned to run away, but the Pyro was too quick on them, hitting one after the other with the Chinese sign, vaporizing them both. The remaining three fish people, seeing the thorough ownage of their comrade's faces and the group still standing strong, turned tail and ran for their lives. "Yeah! We did it!" Vinyl jumped up in excitement. "Did what?" Caroline asked from the back. "What was all that noise?" "Well done guys." Sephiroth said, sheathing his blade. "Hmm! Hmmph!" The Pyro yelled, running to the pony. "Pyro! It's so good to see you!" Vinyl said. "Hmmph hmm mmm phmm!" "What happened to you? For a while we thought you were dead." "Hmm Hmm! HMMPH MM!" "Wait Vinyl." Sephiroth approached the two. "He's trying to tell us something." "Hmm hmmph hmm mm hmmph phmmphmmh!" "But we just fought off the pack." "Hmm hmmph! Hmm! Mmm mmph!" Sephiroth turned to the others. "He says that those creatures hunt in groups." The low rumbling sound returned, much louder this time, actually shaking the cavern. "Groups of hundreds at the least." "In other words, that was just the appetizer to this fishy feeding frenzy!" Yakko said, backing away from the incoming army. "Let's skedaddle!" The group ran in the other direction. They could only hope that there was some kind of escape route in this corridor. Their escape plan did not last for long however. Through the transparent shields, they could see even more fish people encroaching on the hallway. They began pouring through just a little ways away from the group, surrounding them. "What do we do now?" Vinyl asked, clutching the boot of her tall friend. "I..." Sephiroth stuttered. "I don't know." Just when all hope seemed lost, the Pyro remembered the note from Will. He reached into the backpack and located the button. He pulled it out of the backpack and said, "Hmmph! Hmm hmmph mm mmm mmph!" "What's that?" Sephiroth asked. "Where did you get this from?" "Hmm hmm!" "What!? From Will!?" He shouted. "How do you know it's not just a bomb?!" "Hmmph hmm hmmph hmm mm!" "He wants us dead! And now you expect us to trust him?" "Boys!" Vinyl Scratch yelled. "We really don't have much choice! If Pyro says we should press it, then we should press it!" Sephiroth, noting that the armies were just seconds away, snatched the device out of the Pyro's hand and pressed the red button. Instantly, a blinding white flash engulfed the group, lifting them all a bit off of the ground. A high frequency pitch drop, and the group vanished without a trace, yet again leaving a lovely cliffhanger for you fine readers.