Only Human: A Lyra Heartstrings Production

by Smoking Gun

Chapter 11: And We're Back

"You ever get that sense of impending doom?"

Lyra at one end of the table, looking down at the contract in front of her. Bon Bon sat opposite her, with the morning sun rising from the window behind her.

"That tense feeling between you stomach and lungs that tells you something bad is going to happen?"

"Yeah," said Bon Bon.

"Why do I feel that looking at this?"

Lyra wasn't looking at Bon Bon. Her eyes were locked on the document, specifically the title...

'Only Human - Season Renewal'

"I think you might be a bit paranoid," Bon Bon said with a sweet smile. "Only Human is getting a second season! Congratulations!"

Lyra looked up at Bon Bon. "Except we need one more signature."

"That's the beauty of it," Bon Bon explained. "It's already been approved. She has to sign it. If she doesn't she's fired."

Lyra chuckled. "That won't make getting the signature any more fun."

"You want me to do it?" asked Bon Bon.

"No... it has to be me. I need to make things right with her."

Lyra pulled the contract off the table and placed it in her saddle bag. "You remember that we're...?"

"I remember," Bon Bon said with a smart-ass expression. "Miss Heartstrings is moving into her first apartment tonight."

"Yep," Lyra said, looking proud, "and you'll be joining me for dinner; help me break in the dinning room."

"And the bedroom," Bon Bon added "And... basically every other room in the house."

Lyra broke into a fit of giggling. "Heheh... we're not actually gonna have dinner, are we?"

"Probably not," Bon Bon said with a quick wink.

"We talkin' sex dinner?"

Lyra turned with a yelp, seeing Vinyl, poking her head through the door to Bon Bon's office.

"VINYL!" Lyra shouted. "What are you doing?!"

Vinyl smirked. "I came to tell you that the guys wanna talk to you, but I'm wondering if I should break out the scented candles and whips."

Lyra turned back to Bon Bon. "I'll see you tonight, alright?"

Bon Bon winked and waved goodbye as Lyra as she stepped out of the office.

"Did the ratings come in?" Lyra asked as she walked Vinyl down the hall to the writers room.

"Yep, but I did hear what you and Bon Bon were talking about. When were you gonna tell us?"

"After I got Synergy's signature," Lyra explained. "I'm gonna get it before I start moving into my apartment."

"House warming party!" Vinyl cried.

Lyra gave Vinyl a bemused look. "If you throw me a house warming party, I won't have a home to live in."

"That's how you know you're doing it right."

Lyra pushed the door to the writers room open, inside she found her three other writers Ink Splash had his foreleg wrapped around Feather Quill as they gazed into their laptop, and Short Hoof was playing on her phone, looking bored as hell.

"Howdy, Lyra," Ink Splash remarked. "The ratings for episode 17 came in."

"We're up 2.7% from last week." Feather Quill added.

"So when were you gonna tell us about the renewal?"

Lyra's jaw went a little slack. "How could you possible know?"

Short Hoof waved her phone. "Vinyl told me."

Lyra looked at Vinyl, who took her seat next to Short Hoof. "Now imma tweet it real quick."

"No you won't!" Lyra said as she took her seat at the head of the table. "I was already kinda-sort-maybe involved with the leak of information before and Synergy was pissed."

"Doesn't she hate you anyway?" asked Short Hoof.

"Well... yeah. But if we're going to be here for another year at least, I need to smooth things out with her." Lyra explained.

"Why?" Feather asked. "You two are now rarely ever going to see each other. Why would you need to smooth things out so quickly?"

Lyra's head sunk. "Because I don't think she deserves most of the flack she's been given."

"Buck you, Lyra Heartstrings," Vinyl said, impersonating Synergy. "Imma watch humanity fall on your head because I haven't had a stiff one since Dinosaurs were willing to offer!"

Vinyl paused for a moment, then levitated over a pad and pen, and started writing. "This is gold."

"Vinyl, please," Lyra moaned as she rubbed her head. "I have to speak with her to get the showed officially renewed. Please, if any of you see her, be nice."

"She called me a coke addict," Short Hoof mentioned.

"Aren't ya?" Ink asked.

"I'm a coinsure."

Lyra sighed. "Synergy tried to be like me, and she lost her husband over it. She nearly lost everything. If you lost as much as she had, you'd feel the same way. Let me straighten things out with her, and we can put this all behind us."

Short Hoof leaned in towards Lyra. "She's a network executive. I don't care what happened before. She has more than any of us."

Lyra didn't say anything. She slowly got up out of her seat and walked out of the room.

Vinyl put her hoof to her mouth. "Tell her we said 'eat a D—'"

"Everypony says hi," Lyra said nervously, standing in the doorway to Synergy's office.

Synergy was alone. She was using her foreleg to lean up against the window that overlooked the studio and all of Canterlot. She gazed blankly out the window, almost like Lyra wasn't actually there.

"Did you redo the office?" Lyra asked as she gazed around the room. "I like it. A lot more mahogany. It's like between seasons of shows were they update the sets, so they kind of look the same, but not really."

No response from Synergy.

Lyra cleared her throat. "So how are Paradigm and Structuring? It looks like you guys don't share an office anymore."

She had taken note of the new desk. Before, the desk was wide enough to site three ponies, but now it was only a one-seater.

Lyra sighed. "Look, I know you hate me. I remind you of stuff, and you know what? I totally get that. I don't expect us to be friends anytime soon, but we should at least be professional."

The unicorn levitated over the contract out of her saddle bag, placing it on Synergy's desk.

There was a minute when absolutely nothing was said or done, until Synergy finally pulled herself away from the view. She signed the document, and went back to looking out the window, not even acknowledging Lyra's presence. Lyra levitated the document back to her, placing it in her bag.

"I'll see you around, Synergy," Lyra said with a hint of defeat in her voice as she turned for the exit.

"Did I ever tell you about the bats?" Synergy asked, still gazing out the window.

Lyra blinked in confusion as she turned around. "The what?"

Synergy slowly turned around, although her gaze wondered around the carpet and her desk. "My Great Grandfather and his brother inherited a large sum of bits after their parents died. So they took their money and bought some farmland a few miles outside of Manehattan. A few weeks in, they almost lost the business... because of the bats."

The executive slumped into her chair, still gazing into space. "They had bought farm land over a cave, a cave infested with fruit bats. They would come out at night and eat all the fruit before they could sell it the next day. One day, they went into town to try and find an exterminator, only to get turned down by each and everyone they found... until the last one."

Lyra shot Synergy a confused look.

Synergy continued. "They found this one exterminator in an old, run down shop. They asked him if he could take care of the bats, and he said he would be there in the morning. My Great Grandfather and his brother went back to the house, having to hear the bats one more time. When the bats would eat, they'd let out these screeches, like they were being merry over their feast."

Lyra's eyes darted around the room, almost like she was looking for an escape route.

Looking over at Synergy, Lyra realized that she wasn't blinking. "The next morning, the exterminator showed up, towing a wagon behind him. He told the brothers to wait in the house and not come out until he was done. My Great Grandfather lost his patience and went down to the entrance of the cave. It was too dark for him to see anything."

Why is she mumbling?

"He couldn't see anything... but he could them, the bats. They were screeching, but not the happy screeches from when they ate, these were cries... agony, grief, fear."

Sweat trickled down Lyra's forehead.

Synergy thumped the desk with her hoof. "Then, all he could hear were thumps. One after the other. Thump... thump... thump. The bats weren't hanging around anymore."

Without warning, Synergy's eyes darted up to Lyra's, making the unicorn freeze up.

"And before the sun was up, all the bats were gone."

"I don't want you gone!"

Lyra struggled to pry Ditzy from her, her forlegs were wrapped tightly around her torso while Ditzy's head was on it's side against her chest. Poor Ditzy was crying.

"Who will make fun of ugly customers with me?"

"I'm sure you'll find somepony," Lyra said as she looked around the restaurant. It was closed for the afternoon, so most of the tables just had boxes of Lyra's stuff on them. "You know I'm not gone right? The guys and I will come down for lunch everyday."

Ditzy's hold became tighter. "It won't be the same!"

"You have to learn to let go."

The two ponies looked to the entrance, seeing Bon Bon trot in.

Bon Bon continued. "Now let go of my Lyra before you suffocate her."

"Never!" Ditzy proclaimed.

"OK," Bon Bon said with a shrug. "I guess I'll just have to do horrible things to my Lyra while you hold on and watch.

Ditzy was silent for a moment before releasing Lyra. "I'll miss you, babe."

Lyra gently hugged Ditzy. "I'm not going far."

"Speaking of going too far..." Bon Bon mumbled.

Lyra looked over at Bon Bon, seeing a laptop hanging over her back.

"What's that for?" Lyra asked.

"An interesting article came up that you should see." Bon Bon said as she placed the laptop on a free table. "I think I figured out where our extra ratings have been coming from."

Lyra released Ditzy, took a seat at the table, and read the article titled 'Unusual Fandom Emerges From Children's Show'.

"So," Ditzy said as she turned to Bon Bon. "Congratulations on the second season."

"All the congratulations should go to Lyra... I wouldn't be anywhere near this successful without her."

Ditzy chuckled before descending back into her serious voice. "Yeah... imagine that."

Bon Bon looked to Ditzy, giving her a worried expression. "Are you.... are you still being weird about me?"

Ditzy arched an eyebrow. "Wouldn't you be?"

Bon Bon glanced over at Lyra, who wasn't reading the article anymore. She was sporting a look of shock and confusion. Ditzy and Bon Bon trotted over to the desk.

"Honey?" Ditzy asked. "Are you OK?"

Lyra didn't say anything, keeping up her confused visage.

"Lyra," Bon Bon leaned in towards her. "You OK?"

Lyra's lips trembled and her throat croaked as she tried to get one simple word out of her mouth.

"Homies."

Next: They're Called What?!