//------------------------------// // Date Night Escape // Story: Returning Survivor // by Itchy //------------------------------// Mecha sighed, as he waited in line, fiddling with his latest design. Normally, this would be the last thing he'd be doing while waiting in line, but considering that cider season didn't open for another four hours... yeah, he was stuck fiddling around with his creation. Normally, waiting all night in a line would be his cup of tea, but ever since he started to only get one hour of sleep every three days, he'd found them a lot less enjoyable. In fact, this was possibly the most boring thing he's done since he ended up on watching paint dry as a job. Although, it did pay 15 bits an hour... but still, that didn't change the present. Here he was, awake at four in the morning, with nothing to do. Cheerilee wouldn't be up for another three hours... and Snips and Snails were way down in the line, so he couldn't talk with anypony. Although... LINEBREAKER Mecha giggled as he put the finishing touches of his masterpiece. With an evil grin, he took out a camera and snapped a quick picture before sneaking out of Doctor Whooves and Ditzy Do's tent, sitting back down next to his cooler. Spotting a yawning Cheerilee, Mecha chuckled before opening his cooler and grabbing a soda. Passing it to her, he asked, “Sleep well?” Nodding her head, Cheerilee opened the caffeinated drink, before downing it in one go. Letting a shiver run down her spine, she said, “Quite well. How'd you pass the time?” Shrugging, Mecha replied, “Spent most of it fiddling around with my latest device, before getting bored and pranking the timeless couple in front of us.” Eyebrow raised, Cheerilee asked, “What did you do to them?” Chuckling, Mecha handed her the photo he'd just taken, and said, “Put them into one sleeping bag, covered Doc in clown make-up, painted over Ditzy's eyelids to make it look like she's always got her eyes opened, and superglued the two together at the flanks.” Cheerilee shook her head at her stallionfriend's behavior, before saying, “Anything else?” Turning his head to the side, Mecha replied, “Eenope.” Giggling a little, Cheerilee said, “Isn't that Big Macintosh's line?” Shrugging, Mecha replied, “I'm an honorary Apple family member. Therefore, I get to use all lines the family uses.” At the look his marefriend was shooting him, Mecha sighed before pulling out a sheet of paper, and handed it to her. Looking over the paper, Cheerilee asked, “Is this really...?” Grinning, Mecha said, “Eeyup. An honorary birth certificate, stating me as a member of the Apple family.” Giving the paper another glance, Cheerilee had to ask, “What did you do to earn this?” Laughing, Mecha took the paper back from her, and replied, “I played my fiddle at a family re-union. We still good for dinner this weekend?” Nodding her head, Cheerilee muttered under her breath, “Played the fiddle?” LINEBREAKER Mecha let out a long breath as he stretched, making sure he was limber and loose before the contest started. Glancing over at Sugary Sweet's and Wolfgang's preparation, Mecha smirked. By themselves, the Apple family had no hope of matching the Flim Flam brother's machine. But with him and his family? They might stand a chance. Granted, they'll win for sure when Applejack's friends got involved, as they were bound to do. He wasn't the only honorary Apple family member here after all! Getting into place, Mecha kept an eye on Doctor Whooves, listening to the count down. Tensing himself up, he focused on his target, taking deep, long breaths. When he heard his aunt say “GO!” he sprang straight into action, flying through the air, and impacting the tree in front of him with a resounding THUD, apples falling into the basket left there by Wolfgang, to be picked up by Sugary Spice. But Mecha didn't stop there, he kicked himself off from the tree, flying towards the next, as he flipped around in order to hit it with his hind-legs. Feeling the wood on his hooves, Mecha took off again, heading for the next tree in the line... LINEBREAKER When his aunt called time, Mecha collapsed. He hadn't had to do that much consecutive leaping since Sloth's palace collapsed while he was in it! While he was recovering, he listened to the final count... and was upset that they'd lost by five barrels. Shaking his head, he watched sadly as Big Macintosh tried to comfort his family, only to witness the expression “One bad apple ruins the batch” in action, as Flim and Flam had allowed Quality Control to slip in order to match production. Grinning, Mecha cheered, especially when Cheerilee rushed up to him and gave him a big hug. “You were brilliant!” she said, as she held him close. A second later, she pushed him away, adding, “But you need a shower...” Laughing, Mecha replied, “The moment I have feeling in my legs again.” LINEBREAKER A couple hours, and one shower, later, and Mecha was waiting for Cheerilee to show up for their date, when Rainbow Dash and Applejack walked up. “Hey Mecha, you got a moment?” Applejack asked, flagging him down. “Kinda,” he replied, eying a nearby clock. “I'm supposed to meet up with Cheerilee for our date soon...” “That's actually what we're here for,” Rainbow Dash said. “You see, we both really wanted to thank you for your help earlier...” “And ah know that you two don't have anything special planned for tonight since ah asked Big Macintosh,” Applejack added. “So we were wondering if you two would like to join us at this fancy restaurant that gave me a free dinner for four,” Rainbow Dash finished. Eyebrow raised, Mecha looked at them, before asking, “Why'd they give you free dinner?” Startled, Rainbow replied, “I entered in a contest for a day with the Wonderbolts, got the consolation prize. Why?” Sighing, Mecha replied, “You'd be surprised at how often a free meal ends up as a trap for you and your closest friends. So, if Cheerilee doesn't mind, then sure, we'll tag along!” “If I don't mind what?” Cheerilee asked, walking up to the group. “Basically a double date at restaurant Rainbow here won free dinner at,” Mecha said, filling her in. Raising an eyebrow, Cheerilee looked between the couple and her stallionfriend, before chuckling a little, and saying, “Not a problem for me, especially since Applejack isn't trying to have you go with Big Macintosh.” Mecha's eye twitch while Applejack and Rainbow Dash looked confused. “You just had to bring that up, didn't you?” he asked, shaking his head. “Had to bring what up?” Rainbow Dash asked, as they started walking towards the train station. “One of the more embarrassing moments of my life...” Mecha replied. “More embarrassing then the third time ya blew up your chem lab?” Applejack asked. Facehoofing loudly, Mecha said, “Big M just had to tell you that story, didn't he?” Applejack grinned, before replying, “Eeyup.” LINEBREAKER The couples had arrived at the restaurant, and were on there way inside, when Mecha spotted the name. Grinning, Mecha said, “Oh, this is going to be fun.” Raising an eyebrow, Cheerilee asked, “In what way?” “This,” Mecha said, waving his hoof at the restaurant, “Is owned by Fancy Smancy. My arch-rival is about to give us a free meal.” Cheerilee laughed lightly, as the host asked, “Name?” “Rainbow Dash, party of four,” Rainbow told him. “Ah, madam Dash, do you happen to have your prize on you?” the host said. Nodding her head, Rainbow Dash handed him a card, which he quickly went over. Nodding his head, the host asked, “Do you mind waiting for a minute? The owner has requested to see you.” Shooting Mecha a glance, he nodded his head, signaling that he was okay with it. So, with a shrug, Rainbow Dash replied, “Not at all.” With a quick nod of his head, the host was on the way, and Rainbow quickly turned and asked, “What's up Mecha? I thought you hated this guy.” Mecha gave an evil grin, before saying, “I'm pretty sure I can abuse the situation. After all, I've got ten bits that the first thing he says is 'I won't allow him to eat here!' while pointing at me.” Raising an eyebrow, Applejack asked, “Ah'm not trying to pry or anything, but uh... isn't that a bad thing?” Here question went unanswered, as Fancy Smancy showed up, and confirmed Mecha's thoughts when he shouted, “I won't allow him to eat here!” Mecha instantly snapped to attention, a look of indignant outrage on his face. “Oh, that's the thanks I get huh?” At this point, the three mares with him were confused, and watched without saying anything. “I go out and risk my life and limb, and lose the latter, and this is what happens!” Mecha shouted, throwing his forelegs up into the air. “Not only do I get strange looks for my replacement leg, now I can't even eat at in a public place!” The evil stares being shot at Fancy Smancy showed what Mecha was playing at. After all, Fancy Smancy never said why he wouldn't serve Mecha, and now he couldn't without losing a lot of business for looking like he was a bigoted jerk. Of course, Mecha wanted to play it up a bit. “Is it not enough that I served in our military for two years? Or the fact that I lost my leg during that time? Yes, I understand that it is unusual for me to have a metal leg, so I don't mind the stares, but really? To be discriminated against because of it!” The stares really started to heat up, and some ponies started to get up to leave. Seeing that he was going to lose his business if he didn't do something quick, Fancy Smancy held up his hooves and said, “Wait! I'm sorry sir, but I hadn't even noticed your leg,” grinding his teeth as he held up a fake smile. “I merely mistook you for somepony who has a tendency to attack me and my image in public. You do share a striking resemblance. Tell you what, not only is the meal on the house, but so is whatever wine you drink, no limit!” Smiling, Mecha replied, “Thank you sir, and I'm sorry for jumping to conclusions. It's just that everypony seems to be staring at my leg... it just got to me.” “I understand perfectly,” Fancy Smancy said, teeth beginning to crack. “But now, allow me to set you fine folk,” he added, quickly moving towards an empty table. Sitting down, the four waited until he left, before breaking down in laughter. “That,” Rainbow Dash started, “That was freakin' awesome! Dude, how did you keep such a straight face!” Wiping a tear from his eye, Mecha replied, “Through lots and lots of practice. Most of which involved either tricking nobles out of their bits or making the public despise them unless they did what I suggested. For the most part, real good party trick.” Shaking her head, Applejack said, “Ah'm normally not one for trickery, but from what ah've heard of this guy, he deserved it.” “Oh, he deserved it,” Cheerilee replied. “That foal tried to ruin our date once...” “Bah,” Mecha interrupted, “Deserved it or not, I did it. Beside, now I can pilfer his wine stock for free! Do you know how much expensive wine he must carry?” Any response was cut off when a wall blew out, revealing a bunch of dark blue ponies, all unicorns, standing in the hole. “Alright everypony, get down!” the lead unicorn shouted. “You are now all prisoners of the Nightmare Clan!” “By Lucifer's lake!” Mecha swore, before standing up. “What in the hay are you nut-jobs doing out of prison!” The members of the Nightmare Clan flinched, before turning to face Mecha. Most of the guests took this moment to flee, as the leader said, “No cell can keep us contained! And now, we shall have our revenge against you!” At this point, another wall blew up, as most of the royal guard showed up, surrounding the clan. “By Nightmare Moon's horn!” the leader swore, as the clan kicked up tables to defend themselves with. “Don't let them take you my comrades!” he shouted, before launching a blast of magic towards Mecha. Acting quick, Mecha kicked the table up so that it took the blast, as he and the mares took cover under it. “Right,” Mecha said, as his leg started to shift, “no time like the present to test a highly dangerous tool. Rainbow Dash, go and find the princesses, they'll easily be a big help for this. Cheerilee, Applejack... just stay under cover. Rainbow is fast enough to avoid their blasts, you're not.” Getting a nod from Rainbow, she bolted off as Cheerilee asked, “What are you going to do?” “Me?” Mecha snorted, as his leg solidified into a... tube looking thing. “I'm going to try and drop that chandelier on them,” he said, pointing at the giant crystalline structure above the Nightmare Clan. Pointing the end of his mechanical leg at the chain connecting the chandelier, he pulled a trigger on his leg, causing a loud “BOOM!” to erupt in the dinning room. Mecha swore as the steel bullet he'd shot missed his target, before ricocheting off the wall and hitting a chain... of the chandelier above him. The small chandelier fell, trapping Mecha under it. “Lust's panties dipped in Gluttony's deep fryer served wrapped in Sloth's hammock!” He curse, as he reloaded his leg. It was upon finishing the reload that he realized his problem. “By Luna's diary, I can't aim!” he shouted, as he realized he was totally pinned down. Glancing between Mecha and the chandelier hanging above the Nightmare Clan, Applejack said, “Screw it!” and grabbed Mecha's leg... and pulled it right off. Ignoring the bolts of magic flying past her, she began to aim. “What in Luna's name was that for!” Mecha yelled at her, flailing under the weight of the chandelier. “You can't aim under that thing, so ah took matters into my own hoof!” Applejack replied, closing one eye to try and focus better. “I have a button to dis-attach my leg, you didn't have to rip it off!” Mecha said, still yelling. Ignoring his yells, Applejack pulled the trigger, before being blasted backwards from the recoil. Looking up, she spotted the window she'd broken, before yelling, “Con sarn it! Ah missed! How do you reload this blasted thing?!?” Sighing, Mecha resigned himself to be ignored over the injustice of having his leg ripped off, and said, “Pull back the lever...” and watched as Applejack flipped his leg over, reaching for a piece of metal that was outstretched. “NO! That's the cartridge switch! I said the lever!” “Well how was ah suppose to know that!” Applejack yelled back. “None of these blasted things are labeled!” “Just... just... just hand it to me! I'll reload it!” Mecha hollered. “How in tarnation do you plan on doing that! You've only got one leg!” Applejack replied. “...I only use one leg to reload it in the first place...” Mecha deadpanned. Blinking, Applejack handed the leg back to Mecha, while rubbing the back of her head, saying, “Oh yeah...” Sighing, Mecha quickly reloaded the weapon, before passing it back to Applejack. “Remind me to add slow re-action time to the reasons for revenge against the princesses later,” Mecha said. “Will do,” Cheerilee replied, as Applejack took aim once more. “By the way, what is that thing?” “That?” Mecha snorted, as Applejack began to pull the trigger. “Just a gun... basically, ball of steel propelled by an explosion caused by powdered hydra scale. All in all, should be more effective than a bow an arrow... but the aim is terrible!” Another bang filled the restaurant, followed by a crashing sound. “WAHOO! Ah finally hit that blasted thing!” Applejack cheered, as the members of the Nightmare Clan groaned under the chandelier's weight. “And just in time,” Mecha replied, “The princesses have arrived.” LINEBREAKER After an hour of arrests, retelling of the experience, and lifting a chandelier off Mecha, and everything was back to normal. Or as normal as you can get for Mecha. “So...” Mecha started, staring at the two princesses. “Do you mind if we raid you kitchens for dinner? Ours was kinda interrupted.” Chuckling, Luna replied, “Go ahead. Just don't touch my moon shine... or moon pies.” “Or my cake,” Celestia added. Shaking his head, Mecha said, “Wouldn't think about it...” as he walked towards the palace, aided by Cheerilee since his leg couldn't be re-attached yet. LINEBREAKER “I told you I could get you out,” said a cloaked figure, as he watched Mecha walk away. “I never doubted you,” replied a second figure. “Although, I was concerned about my presence being missed when they took in my brothers and sisters...” The first figure snorted, before saying, “Faked the records. As far as the wardens know, you never existed.” The second figure nodded his head, before saying, “And I thank you for that. But now I must ask, are the items I requested ready?” “They are,” the cloaked figure replied. “Although what you need all those things for is beyond me.” The second figure chuckled, before saying, “All in due Capo... all in due time...”