//------------------------------// // Chapter 7: Super Secret Undercover Fillies // Story: A Head Full of Clay // by Squinty Mudmane //------------------------------// The train pulled into Canterlot station after an uneventful ride, each pony having been too engrossed in their own thoughts to have much in the way of conversation. Twilight led the Crusaders through the grand and dignified station building, then through the bustling streets full of ponies going about their business, some carrying bags full of shopping goods, others sitting at tables outside cafés enjoying various refreshments. The route to the Canterlot Archives took them through an immaculately tended park populated by numerous sculptures of stone and marble, the trees in various hues of green, purple and gold. Here and there, groundskeepers were busy clearing away the occasional fallen autumn leaves, keeping the park in pristine condition. The Archives reared up in the middle of the park, a tall, imposing building topped with a sun-crowned spire. Members of the Canterlot Royal Guard stood watch near the entrance, while others patrolled the walls in pairs. “Greetings, Miss Sparkle!” one of the guards at the main door barked as they approached, maintaining a perfect poker face. “Would you like to enter through the door this time, or do you prefer to use the window again?” His companion did his best to suppress a snigger. Twilight smirked a bit. “Very funny, Bulwark. If you gentlecolts are done cracking wise, could you allow us entry? I’m taking the fillies here to visit the Archives.” “Sure thing, Twilight,” the second guard replied with a chuckle and opened the door with a little shimmer of magic. “Enjoy the books.” “What was that about?” Scootaloo asked as Twilight led the fillies inside the building. The walls were lined with colourful tapestries, some heraldic in nature, others depicting scenes of what were presumably parts of Equestrian history. These were separated at regular intervals by wooden double doors. “Oh, nothing,” Twilight replied, letting out a slightly nervous chuckle. “Uh, let’s start our tour here, shall we?” She led them over to the first door. “This is the section for Equestrian judicial history. It contains documents and records of every legislation passed in the last hundred years, complete with transcripts of all tribunals and court proceedings.” She directed their attention to the opposite door. “And this is the medical section. It contains detailed anatomy studies not just of ponies, but of every living species discovered thus far, along with extensive lists of known ailments and illnesses, as well as their cures and treatments.” Apple Bloom led out an inward groan as Twilight led them towards the next set of doors. Looking at the number of them in this hallway alone, Twilight’s well-intentioned tour would most likely take them several hours. She decided to speed things up a little. “Say, Twilight, if somepony wanted to find records of, uhm, how many apples were picked last year, where’d ya find that?” she asked innocently. “That would be the fifth door on our right, in the agricultural section under yearly statistics,” Twilight replied with a smile. “And how about, uh, scooter designs?” Scootaloo chimed in, picking up on Apple Bloom’s idea. “Scooters? I would assume that would be under engineering in the technical section, the seventh door on our left.” “And how about stuff like diaries and journals?” Apple Bloom continued, trying to affect as nonchalant an air as possible. “Those would be in the section for biographies. That’s around the corner at the end of this hallway and then the third door on our right.” Twilight let out a little chuckle. “Don’t worry, girls, we’ll get around to them all in due time. Just be patient.” “Sure thing, Twilight!” Apple Bloom smiled widely, while Scootaloo mouthed “Distraction!” to Sweetie Belle behind Twilight’s back. Before she had a chance to think one up, however, it was presented to them on a silver platter. “Halt!” a commanding voice called out behind them. All four ponies snapped around to see an imposing white unicorn clad in gold-trimmed violet armour and wearing a crested helm. A smaller, somewhat lanky grey unicorn wearing glasses and carrying a saddlebag filled with several rolled-up scrolls accompanied him. The larger of the two ponies stepped towards the group, his face set in a stern, unyielding expression of authority. He stopped a few steps away from Twilight. “Miss Sparkle,” he said tersely. “Captain Armor,” Twilight replied in an equally curt tone. The standoff went on for several moments, before Twilight broke into a ridiculous grimace involving poking her tongue at her own nostril, causing the larger unicorn to burst into laughter. “Celestia save me, that face is just too much! It’s cheating!” he gasped in between fits of amusement. “Inkhoof, did you record the time? I think that might have been a new record.” “Erh, yes, sir,” the smaller unicorn replied stiffly, browsing through the various scrolls in his bag. “Should I list it under ‘Commendations’, ‘Noteworthy behaviour’, or…?” “Relax, Inkhoof, I’m just kidding.” He grinned at his companion before turning to look at Twilight with a wide smile. “Well played, Twily. But one of these days, I’ll get back at you.” “Keep dreaming, brother,” Twilight giggled and embraced Shining Armor. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo exchanged a look and nodded in unison. “Remember, keep her occupied,” Apple Bloom whispered urgently to Sweetie Belle, before she and Scootaloo ran off as quickly and quietly as they could, heading for the end of the hallway. “So what are you doing here? You don’t usually come to a place like this just to read,” Twilight said as she let go of her brother, who smiled and shook his head. “You’re right, sadly. Duty as usual. I’m inspecting the guards stationed here at the Archives and making sure everything is up to scratch. After all, we have to make sure the place is protected from break-ins by studious unicorns.” He smirked just a bit as Twilight rubbed her temple with a hoof. “I’m never going to hear the end of that one, am I?” she sighed. “You know it.” Shining Armour let out a little chuckle and nudged Twilight on the shoulder. “What about you? I’m guessing you aren’t here to throw me a surprise party on an otherwise dull inspection round?” “Actually, I’m showing these three fillies here around the Archives.” She smiled and gestured at Sweetie Belle and her two absent friends. “I’m sure you remember them; they were the flower fillies at your wedding. This is Sweetie Belle, sister of my friend Rarity, and this is—Wait, where’s Apple Bloom and Scootaloo?” She looked around in surprise. “Oh, they, uh, decided to go off and explore the rest of the Archives on their own. They said they’d meet us back here when they were done,” Sweetie Belle replied with a little shrug. “Oh, shoot,” Twilight muttered. “Well, don’t worry. I’m sure the archivists will be able to keep them from wandering too far. If I see them on my round, I’ll tell them to come back to you,” her brother said reassuringly. “I guess you’re right. If you find them, tell them we’ll be in the medical section here.” “I will. Take care now, Twily. You too, Sweetie Belle.” Shining Armor grinned a bit and saluted the two before walking off, followed by his assistant. “See you later, BBBFF,” Twilight called after him. She turned to Sweetie Belle with a smile. “Well then, let’s get started, shall we?” Apple Bloom nudged the door to the biography section open and slipped inside. Even though she was pretty sure that nothing prohibited fillies from visiting the Canterlot Archives, she still felt like they were doing something furtive. A desk to their left was manned by an elderly unicorn who seemed busy reading some novel or another. She did not look up even when the door closed behind them with a noise that seemed shockingly loud in the otherwise quiet atmosphere of the building. The two fillies glanced around at the many bookshelves, realizing with a sinking feeling that there were far more books here than in Twilight’s library. “Where do we start?” Scootaloo whispered to Apple Bloom. “Well, them bookshelves are marked with letters. Ah suppose the one marked with a ‘T’ is as good a place as any?” They snuck past the archivist’s desk, even though sneaking at this point was probably largely redundant, and headed over to the appropriate bookshelf, which was many times higher than the two fillies. Apple Bloom glanced quickly at the rows of books. “All right, looks like these are all ordered alphabetically. So long as the journal’s on one of the lower rows, we’ll be fine.” They began to look through the books. Several of them, mainly the diaries, did not have names on their spines, and they had to pull them from the shelf and look at the front cover instead. “Tidebreak, Tiepin, Tillery, Timbercoat, Timberhoof, Timbermane, Timidwing… aha!” Scootaloo triumphantly pulled out the last book on the lowest row. “Here we go! Angling as a Lifestyle! Wait, what?” She blinked and looked at the author name again. “Tincoast? Urgh, that means Tincoat must be—” The two fillies looked up to the top of the next section of the bookshelf. They let out groans in perfect synch. “All right, what if Ah give ya a hoof up? Think ya can reach it then?” Apple Bloom asked hopefully. “Unless you can also grow to like ten times your own size, probably not,” Scootaloo grumbled in reply. “Okay, uhm… How about if we make a step ladder out of books? Then we’d be able to reach the top shelf!” Scootaloo shrugged. “Better than my idea.” “Which was?” Apple Bloom asked as she began to pull out various books and stacking them. “Tip the entire bookshelf over.” They had just emptied two of the bottom rows of the shelf and stacked the books about halfway up to the top when a shadow fell over them. They paused and looked up to see the unicorn from earlier looming over them, looking at them with a mixture of puzzlement and annoyance. “Can I help you, young ladies?” she asked in a dangerously polite tone. “Uhm, yeah, we’re lookin’ for a journal written by somepony named Tincoat. We think it’s way up there, an’ we couldn’t reach it, so, uh…” Apple Bloom shifted nervously from hoof to hoof. The unicorn raised an eyebrow. “And why, may I ask, did you not ask for assistance? Or even more pressingly, why didn’t your friend just fly up and get it? She has wings, doesn’t she?” Scootaloo turned a deep shade of red, but Apple Bloom cut her off before she could reply. “Yeah, well, think ya could get it for us now that you’re here anyway?” The unicorn sighed and her horn glowed a light blue. “Tincoat, you say? Let’s see… Here it is.” She levitated a thin, black and wholly unremarkable book down from the top shelf. There was a fine layer of dust on it. “Doesn’t look like anypony has asked for this one in a long time. Are you going to read it here, or do you plan on borrowing it?” “Borrow it, if ya please,” Apple Bloom replied, glancing at Scootaloo who looked to be struggling very hard to keep her temper in check. “Right, this way, then. I’ll need your name and address.” Apple Bloom glanced behind her at the half-finished improvised step ladder. “What about them other books? Should we clean ’em up?” “I think it’s best you leave that to someone more qualified,” the unicorn replied shortly. “Now, write your name here and your address here…” “That hag should get bucked right in her stupid face,” Scootaloo growled as they closed the door to the biography section behind them. “Scootaloo!” Apple Bloom let out a gasp, glancing nervously at the door, half expecting the unicorn to burst out after them. “Ah’m sure she meant no insult. She didn’t know that, uhm—” “That I can’t fly? Maybe she could, oh, I don’t know, put two and two together about why I hadn’t already tried getting the book myself?” Scootaloo let out a sigh of exasperation. “Ugh, let’s just go and get Sweetie Belle so we can get out of here.” As it turned out, finding Twilight and Sweetie Belle was easy; one of the patrolling guardsponies helpfully informed them of what Shining Armor had told him to relay to the fillies if he saw them. The medical section looked similar to the one for biographies, the room lined with bookshelf after bookshelf. They followed the sound of muted chatter until they found Sweetie Belle and Twilight, along with a somewhat anxious-looking dark unicorn stallion, presumably whoever managed this section of the archives. Twilight had already gathered a small mountain of books around herself, and was continuing to pull yet more books from the shelves. “…And we could definitely use this one. This one might be interesting too. Oh, this one I’d love to read later. This one might have something too. Oh! And this one!” Sweetie Belle gave her friends a hopeless little shrug as Twilight continued to ramble excitedly to herself. Apple Bloom fought the urge to giggle. It seemed like it might be harder to get Twilight away from the archives than it had been to get her to bring them along. “Miss Sparkle, are you really sure you want to borrow all of these?” the archivist unicorn asked nervously. “It seems like an awful lot all at once.” “Oh, Paperclip,” Twilight chuckled lightly, “you of all ponies should know that there’s only one solution if you can’t find the answer in one book.” She turned to look at him with an expression bordering on the unstable. “Read all the books!” “Erh, yes, well, but maybe you could settle for an amount that, uhm, you might realistically be able to carry out of here?” he replied, glancing at the pile of books. “Oh.” Twilight looked around herself. “Right, well…” She quickly levitated the books past herself one by one. “In that case, I guess I’ll stick with these five. They seem to be the most promising. Thank you for your help in finding them.” She gave the archivist a bright smile. “It, uh, was my pleasure,” he replied, wincing a bit as he looked at the mess of books left behind. “If you’ll just follow me to get these checked out, then.” “Hello again, girls,” Twilight greeted Scootaloo and Apple Bloom as she noticed them. “Are you ready to continue the tour, then?” “Actually, we already finished exploring on our own, so we’re ready to go home,” Scootaloo said. Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What, did you see all of the Canterlot Archives already?” “Yep! Every nook an’ cranny! We’re all set!” Apple Bloom confirmed cheerfully. “But I never got to finish our planned tour!” Twilight complained, looking disappointed. Scootaloo shot a glance at Sweetie Belle, who rolled her eyes behind Twilight’s back, before putting a hoof to her head. “Oh, ow! Ow! I think I feel a headache coming on again,” she declared, with all the dramatic flair she had picked up from Rarity. “Oh? Well, in that case, I suppose we better head back,” Twilight said somewhat reluctantly. “Very well, let me just get these books checked out and we can head off.” The Crusaders waited until Twilight had moved to the desk with the archivist pony before huddling together. “Did you get it?” Sweetie Belle whispered. Apple Bloom nodded. “Got it right here in mah saddlebag,” she confirmed. “How ’bout here? Did Twilight find ya anythin’?” “I think so. At least she seemed rather excited about a couple of those books.” “Good for her. So where do we go from here?” Scootaloo asked. “Ah reckon we should meet up at the clubhouse tomorrow mornin’. Maybe go look in the Everfree Forest afterwards?” Apple Bloom suggested. Her friends nodded in agreement. “Ah’ll have a read in the journal meanwhile, see if there’s any—” “Girls? Are you coming?” Twilight called from the door. “Coming, Twilight!” the three fillies called back, moving over to join her. “So, uhm, do you really think you’ll find something in those books?” Sweetie Belle asked Twilight after they had parted ways with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom back at the Ponyville train station. “I can’t say for sure, of course, but it seems like our best bet. These books are specifically about unicorn physiology and conditions. There’s bound to be something there,” the unicorn librarian replied, giving Sweetie Belle an encouraging smile. “I guess. I just want to say thanks for all your help, Twilight. It’s really nice of you to spend all this time dealing with my problem.” Sweetie Belle gave Twilight’s right foreleg a little hug. “It’s quite all right,” she chuckled. “I’ll be sure to tell you as soon as I find something. Say hi to Rarity from me.” “I will. Bye, Twilight.” Sweetie Belle picked up the bag of eagle feathers in her mouth and headed towards the Carousel Boutique. “Now let’s see…” Twilight muttered to herself, flipping open the first book and hovering it in front of herself as she trotted back towards the library. “Uncommon Unicorn Ailments, chapter one…” Applejack was waiting outside the farmhouse when Apple Bloom came trotting up the road, her bushy tail swishing slowly back and forth over the dirt. As her sister came closer, the farmpony stood up and looked at her carefully. “Hey there, lil’ sis. Ya got a second to talk?” she asked in a way that made it rather clear to Apple Bloom that they were going to have words, whether she had a second or not. “Uhm, sure,” the filly replied somewhat uncertainly, faltering slightly in her step. “What’s the matter?” “Ah had a look at those books in yer room, an’... Ah’m jus’ gonna get straight to the point. Are ya plannin’ somethin’, AB? Maps, travel guides, books about Manehatten? What’s goin’ on?” “Applejack!” Apple Bloom protested, her cheeks growing red. “Ya can’t just go riflin’ through mah things like that!” “Ah had mah reasons,” Applejack replied defensively. “Ya weren’t exactly forthcomin’ ’bout it on yer own, so Ah had to go have a look mahself.” “Oh yeah? And what would ya say if Ah went an’ looked through your room without permission?” Apple Bloom asked angrily, stomping a hoof in the ground. “Don’t get uppity with me, missy. Ah’m the older sister here, it’s mah job ta make sure ya don't go an’ get yerself in trouble. If yer hatchin’ some kinda plan ta visit Manehatten on yer lonesome, Ah gotta tell ya that it’s straight out unless ya got a place to stay an’ family to go with.” “This ain’t about Manehatten!” Apple Bloom snapped. “That so?” Applejack pointed a hoof at Apple Bloom’s saddlebag. “What’s in the bag?” “It’s just a book, no big deal!” the filly complained. “If it ain’t no big deal, then go ahead an’ show me,” Applejack said in a voice that brooked no opposition. “Now, young missy.” Still fuming, Apple Bloom opened her saddlebag and showed her sister the worn black journal. Applejack leaned forward and squinted slightly to read the words on the cover. “Tincoat’s Journal. Ain’t that the name o’ that feller from the other book? What exactly is this, lil’ sis?” she asked. Apple Bloom put the book back in her bag. “It’s just an old travel journal, okay? About somepony who went travellin’ a long time ago.” “Interested in travellin’ now, are ya?” Applejack inquired. Apple Bloom just gave a little shrug. “Apple Bloom, be honest with me here,” Applejack said earnestly, looking directly into her sister’s eyes. “What is it yer plannin’?” Apple Bloom looked away and clenched her teeth defiantly. “Look at me, Apple Bloom.” Reluctantly, Apple Bloom raised her gaze up at the older mare with slightly puffy eyes. “Lookie here, lil’ sis, Ah ain’t doin' none o' this ta be mean to ya or anythin’. Ya know that, right?” Applejack continued in a softer voice. Apple Bloom let out a non-committal sound. “Before they went away, Ah promised Ma and Pa Ah’d take care of ya. We all did,” Applejack said gently, putting a hoof around Apple Bloom. “Now, ya don’t need ta tell me what this is all about right now. Ah can wait a bit if it makes ya feel better. But ya gotta promise me ya ain’t gonna run off on yer own without tellin’ me, all right?” “Okay,” Apple Bloom mumbled. Applejack gently lifted her sister’s head to look at her. “No, promise me, AB. Not a Pinkie Promise or scout’s honour or nothin’. Promise me as one sister ta another.” Apple Bloom looked up at her sister quietly for a while, seemingly struggling with herself. “Okay. Ah promise ya, big sis, Ah ain’t gonna go off without tellin’ ya. An’ Ah promise to tell ya what this is all about soon. Just... not now, okay?” Applejack smiled and gave her a tight hug. “That’s all Ah need ta hear, lil’ sis. Ah believe ya.” Apple Bloom hesitated only for a moment before hugging back. Lying to her sister was one of the most abhorrent things she could think of doing, but if worst came to worst, she could think of a way where she would not actually be lying. I’d just be… leaving out the truth for a bit. That’s different from lying, right? Right… She kept telling herself this as a mollified Applejack led her into the farmhouse and towards the kitchen where Big Macintosh and Granny Smith were busy preparing dinner.