//------------------------------//
// Back To Square One  
// Story: The Pony-Filled Life of Alexis Creek 
// by NightmareMoon 
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This story is beginning to be a really random mess of a ton of events that don't make sense and are happening all at once. Just a warning. Also, I think there are a few spelling mistakes in this one. I really need an editor, because although I'm pretty good with grammar and spelling, I'm not perfect and I'm much too lazy to check my work.

Pinkie Pie is great for a number of reasons.

First of all, fourth wall. This might seem like a useless talent. "What's that for? Bah, that's stupid. What are you going to do, huh? Read me a fanfiction 'till I die?"

It's much more complicated than that. I was shocked when I realized how much power that mare actually had. I mean, seriously. She's not even a unicorn! She literally has almost as much raw power inside her than the Princesses themselves.

Breaking the fourth wall doesn't mean just having access to the internet.

She has access to everything.

The future, the past... every single thing that's going on, will ever go on, or is happening in a different planet, dimension, whatever. She's just like the Doctor, except maybe even 20% cooler.

Okay, back to my babbling. You may think it's useless, talking about Pinkie Pie - that one bubbly mare that never really seemed normal or fit in because she's too insane. But, she's not insane. Weird, maybe, but everything she says actually makes sense. She's about as smart as Twilight and as powerful as the Princesses.

Anyways, back to the thing I was talking about. (You do realize I can hear you, right? That you've just ignored and brushed of what Alexis has just said? Shame on you! You should really listen, you know.)

Yeah, yeah, Pinkie. Great for them. Anyways, for the last time, back to what I was saying. Man, I get sidetracked so often, I swear, if I didn't, this fanfiction would be a 200-word oneshot. You know, that's so annoying when people do that! Or ponies, if ponies write fanfictions. Do they write fanfictions? I mean, they have books... yeah, I guess they do. And if they don't, they should... oh my gosh.

Aaaaaand that was me, getting sidetracked. 

Okay. I'm just going to set it in stone, not fool around, anything. Pinkie is the key. I thought it was me, but I seriously doubt it! I checked Twilight for a Magic Scan and it turned out to be zero. Absolutely nothing - not even a speck or a glimpse of a tiny bit of magic. Not even a spark.

But Pinkie, on the other hand? Or hoof, must I say.

Okay, she's smart and powerful, but doesn't really get things. I'm the opposite. What I've figured out from a bunch of 'community meetings' with the Elements is that I'm the brain (well, kind of. At least, I'm smarter than them) and Pinkie's the, quote, 'epic ninja who likes baking cupcakes and using the icing as a sword, then defeating the other meanie-weanie ninjas with her epic cakes that are so epic! And then, they all eat the cakes together! But, it's too late, because all of the cake is already in my tummy-wummy and it's just so delicious!'

Yeah, if you din't notice already, that was a direct quote from Pinkie herself.

You know, I talk waaaaaay, waaaaaay too much. This must be such a boring story. I pity whoever is reading this. Okay, not really. But I KIND of do!


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"If you're correct," Twilight said as slowly as she could stretch her words to be, "that means we have to start all over again. That all the things we've worked on for the past two months is worthless, now, because it's a whole change of plans."

The other Elements nodded. Pinkie opened her mouth and for once nopony stuck a hoof in it before she could even say a word. She didn't say anything for a moment, and it was like for once she was actually thinking. (Excuse me?! I agreed not to think while you were narrating so I didn't get in the way, but that is too much! Hold off the insults, please! Okie Dokie Lokie?)

Okie Dokie Lokie, Pinkie. Now, please, let me go on to what you were saying.

"But that might be a good thing. If Dragon Dude is older than Celestia, he's going to be anticipating our every move. Remember that first time we encountered him, two weeks ago? How he flicked us out with his tail before we could even get in the cave? That was a miserable failure. And, remember Discord? How clever he was and how he was such a smarty-warty meanie-weanie pants? He's about as old as Celestia. That means that we're dealing something worse than Discord here. We have to take this seriously!"

Right now, everypony was staring at Pinkie, dumbfounded, with their eyes wide and mouths wide open as if they were expecting something a bit less smart to come out of her mouth; but they were, like they always were, outsmarted by the one and only Pinkie Pie. Seriously, though, she is pretty random. Last week she was reciting A History of Pre-Celestial Government and Rule (20,000 B.R. through 1 B.R.) 

The B.R. stands for Before Rule. That's before Celestia and Luna took over. There's also a weird patch of time called E.H., which stands for Elements Harmony. That's when the former Spirits of Harmony (and no, not the Princesses we know today) were ruling. Then there's what we're in now, which is D.R., which stands for During Rule. You can figure that one out, can't you?

"You're right!" Rainbow Dash said, her obnoxiously loud voice booming through the air; her wings flapping frantically and lifting her up into the air as she became more and more excited. "Look, I don't normally say this. I never say this. But right now, Pinkie is right. Yeah, that's right! She's absolutely, positively, Rainbow-Dash-approvedly correct in every way."

"That's not a word," Rarity stated with a snooty, ha-ha look on her face (as, even though the two were friends, there was still a rivalry between the two of them); and then her face softened and she said, "but otherwise, I agree with you. We have to think of something that this 'Dragon Dude'-" she said the name with a disgusted look on her face "-will never guess. Think of something absolutely, positively, Rarity-Approved original, that he won't expect."

"Besides," she continued, looking at the five other ponies (and the one human), "who is this Mr. Dragon Lord? I mean, what is he? Is he even a dragon? Is he, perhaps, a draconequus or some other kind of old species that only Twilight knows about?"

"Well," Twilight said, "I've been researching him, and I think he might be a dralagonite."

"Huh?" the other six said simotaneously.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "A dralagonite is a species similar to the draconaquus and the dragon. Except, much more deadly and they shoot poison darts out of their tails and they're telepathic and they grow up to be billions of years old."