//------------------------------// // Bubble Two: Advertising with Applejack // Story: Random Pony Trivia // by Ratnap //------------------------------// The sun rose above Sweet Apple Acres, covering the trees in the same orange light like the coat of a certain farm pony that just turned around in her bed and stifled a yawn. She took a deep and relaxing breath, snuggling into her covers, almost drifting away in slumber again, when the remarkable Cockadoodledoo woke her fully. Applejack winked into the early day’s light, coming through her eastern window. “No time ta waste.” She muttered and rolled out of her bed. “Ah still have ta help Applebloom and Big Mac ta get ready for their vacations at Appleloosa.” The young mare went through her room straight for the bath. To her surprise she found her little sister already there, brushing her teeth. “Good mornin’ sis Ah didn’t expect ya ta be up that early.” The little filly turned her head. “Ah coushn’t schleep!” she tried to say while brushing. During that act she lost her focus and the brush felt to the ground. “Darn.” Applebloom tried to get it up with her hooves, but the tooth paste made her hooves too greasy. After several frustrating attempts she finaly decided to use her muzzle to pick the persisting thing up. Applejack’s snickering earned her a dagger stare from Applebloom which just caused her to giggle even more. “Come on Applebloom, Ah’m helpin’ ya ta get ready with everythin’.” She offered. The little filly hesitated for a second or two. She already was a big pony and didn’t need no help! But finally she nod, it would be some weeks until she sees her again, so there would be no harm to spent some time together, before they part for vacations. They spent the next hour together in the bath grooming the little fillies coat, combing her mane and tail and tying her mane up with her signature bow. Applejack wasn’t such a savaged barbarian like Rarity sometimes seemed to think of her, it was just, that the work on a farm made it a futile attempt to stay clean and “pretty” all the time. That doesn’t meant she and her family wouldn’t enjoy some comfort time every now and then and since Applebloom was going to visit her cousin Breaburn there was no reason not to look representable. “Thank you sis!” the filly shouted before she darted downstairs to join the others with breakfast. The remaining mare sighed slightly. It was always some effort to groom and comb another pony, much more to do it for oneself without the fancy magic a unicorn like Rarity or Twilight had. It wasn’t impossible at all, everypony was used to it and self sufficient regardless if it was an unicorn, pegasus, or earth pony, but for the two latter ones it was mostly exhausting and time consuming to do so. On the way down to the kitchen she mused about the various tools that were made specifically for pegasi and earth ponies to lighten up some of the daily chores and how most of them had failed utterly. She remembered a new kind of plug that Big Mac tried out. It had several wheels and a big rotating wheel which should dig into the ground more easily while pulling the plug. But an unexpected stone made it jump and got her brother that nasty injury which prevent him from helping her through the last apple buck season. No, most of them were in the best useless and in the worst dangerous, it just seemed that there wasn’t a good way to improve a pony’s life with new technologies beside magic powered tools. She entered the kitchen where her whole family was enjoying their oat meal along one of Granny Smith’s famous apple pies. She greeted them and joined in the meal, speaking about the coming holidays and what Applebloom was going to do when they arrived at Appleloosa. She could be a diplomat, railroad-track-builder, blacksmith, circus artist with the buffalos or invent new machines for the ponies there to ease up the work. They spent the rest of the morning laughing and joking about several new concepts that Applebloom made up to earn her cutie mark. They had given up to try to persuade the over enthusiastic filly to slow down and let things simply happen. After breakfast everypony finished preparations for depart and Applejack escorted her siblings to the train station, bidding them farewell. She waited until the train was out of sight, before she returned to the farm. Apple bucking season was over and most of the after work had already been done. So she had plenty of leisure time from now on. Time to spent with her friends, compete with Rainbow Dash, play with Rinona and most importantly, take exhaustive naps in the shadow of the apple trees. A few days later the orange mare was just doing that. Hat lowered into her face, a straw in the muzzle, simply enjoying the sounds of nature enriched with the smell of the apple trees and fertile earth. But something disturbed the piece. Her ears twitched, when she heard the distant sound of something like … a carriage. It wasn’t uncommon that carriages passed the farm, after all it was on the road which led to Canterlot so she paid not much attention to it. At least until the moment the rumbling stopped near her and polite coughing caught her attention. “Excuse me miss.” She heard an oiled voice and put back her hat, blinking in the bright daylight to figure out who was there. Her eyes needed a second or two until they adjusted, revealing three stallions. The one who had spoken was an earth pony, dark grey coat, pitch black mane styled like the past Elvis Neighsley with falling Bits as a cutie mark. She smiled back at the newcomers “What can Ah help ya with?” She rolled to her side and got up, closing slowly the distance between her and the three until she reached the fence. Now she got a closer look at the other two. The carriage was drawn by a pegasus with red coat and a white mane styled just like Zecora’s, just less stripes in it and the cutie mark of a spotlight. The other one seemed to be a mauve unicorn. She wasn’t sure because his yellow mane looked like an exploding star, quite similar to his flashlight cutie mark. “If I may introduce us miss. This are Spot,” he pointed to the Pegasus, “Flash,” the stallion gestured to the unicorn “And my name is Profit.” He smiled a smile too perfect to be completely honest. “We represent new and upcoming inventors and are currently on our way to find ponies who want to test them under real conditions.” Applejack raised an eyebrow and looked at them quizzically. “So y’all go around, knocking on a ponie’s door and get them to use your instruments?” “Basically we do.” He nodded in agreement. “And that’s the reason why we stopped by.” His much too perfect smile returned. “We want to ask if you’re willing to test some of our devices. Use them, give us feedback on them and if you’re willing to let us make photographs of you for an advertising campaign with the machines we would pay some good bits extra for your efforts.” She was thinking for some seconds about it. Getting to test the newest things on the market before they were even out, the chance to improve said gadgets, having the opportunity to be on a cover for advertisements which probably led to more sales for the farm and on top of that being paid for it? What was not to be liked about? “Y’all can call me in!” A good couple of minutes later the stallions had put on a setting within the orchard to take the pictures. Large white canvas’ were placed by the pegasus to reflect light back to her and the unicorn had placed himself behind a professional camera just like Photo Finish had used while she was in town. The place was crowned with a wooden box the size of a filly. In front of it was a plank which reached into it. She was told to press this plank continually with her hoof to make the brush on the end of a free moving arm rotate. She was told that was a new kind of tooth brush which never falls to the ground and are easier to use and get to the hard to reach places. She expected the brushing machine thoroughly. Moved the arm around, adjusted it to the height of her sister and brother respectively and rotated the brush from horizontally to vertically. Everything seemed to be fine. She even ignored the flashlight of the camera which sometimes took a snapshot from her. Her spectators kept silent, leaving her alone with the device to figure it out, only lending a helping hoof if she had a question that wasn’t answered in the instruction paper she got. Profit was making notes on a clipboard whenever she pointed out an open question how to use that thing. Eventually she was ready to give it a try. The brush was watered, it hadn’t a bowl to catch the flowing water another part added to Profit’s list, and tooth paste was applied. She was told to hold her muzzle against the brush while pressing on the plank. She did so and the brush slowly started to rotate. It was a funny sensation that she got in her mouth. It was aching a little, but felt good at the same time. She even had to resist a giggle, when she brushed the inner sides of her teeth and the brush tickled her palate badly. It only got nasty when she turned the brush downwards to brush her lower teeth on the backside. She opened her mouth wide, but it wasn’t wide enough to avoid the brush constantly rubbing into her nose. She shook her head several times in the process and had a good sneeze. She finished the test with washing out her mouth, only slightly worried about the traces of blood in the water. She wasn’t used to that kind of dental treatment, but was sure she could get used to it and her teeth felt cleaner than ever. “So, what do you think about it Miss Applejack?” she was asked by Profit. “Ah have ta say, that ma teeth feel as fresh as a daisy.” Profit started to smile wider. “But there’re still some flaws in it Ah want ta point out.” She added. “At first the brush is too hard and rotates too fast. Even ma teeth were bleeding a bit, Ah don’t see it useful for little fillies or elderly ponies. At this point Ah would say it’s better used for hoof cleaning.” She turned back to Profit and pointed at her face and chest. “And y’all should do something ta avoid that kind of a mess here.” To tell the truth, her whole front as well as most of the parts of the toot brush devices were covered with speckles of the tooth paste. Not a very pleasant view and even if Applejack don’t fuzz about some dirt this kind of a mess was even too much for her, not to mention within a closed room. “Na don’t make tha long face. Just some minor changes and y’all golden.” She smiled reassuring to them. So far it wasn’t as bad as she has expected. Not perfect, but definitely a step in the right direction. Profit cleared his throat. “Well thank you Miss Applejack, we make sure that the changes you suggested are made.” He nodded into Spot’s direction who promptly organized a buck with water for Applejack. After cleaning herself up she asked the three. “Now what have y’all for me next?” Profit pointed hoof to a frame which had about pony size. It had four diagonal support bars which ended in small metal hooks adjusted to a spring. It looked very … odd? “This is a so called ‘Hair Tie Device’.” Profit explained to her. He strapped a hair rubber over the hooks and expanded it with them. “You can put your hair-band on it and have it fixed while you put your hair through it. After that you simply release the stoppers of the hooks so they snap back and you have the band attached without fiddling around with it for hours.” “Ah’m not sure about that one, looks like a real hassle anyway.” She eyed the machine suspiciously but shrugged finally. “Well darn it. Ah promised ta help ya and Ah won’t back out now.” “Take your time Miss Applejack. We surely want to hear your opinion about it.” Profit stepped back from the ‘Hair Tie Device’ and made place for the young mare. She released her long ponytail from its bounds and shook her head in a wide arc. She had her eyes closed for that moment and didn’t noticed the click of the camera. When she walked towards the new test object the mare saw a faint smirk on Spot’s muzzle who was looking at his comrade Flash. She turned her head to the photographer who’s expression was unreadable behind his big shades. She shrugged it off and turned to the device. With the hair-band already fixed she just had to fiddle in her hair through it. But that was far easier said than made. It took as long to get each wisp of hair in, as it would have taken, if she had made it on the traditional way. And there wasn’t only that problem, several times her hair just got entangled on the hooks and she had to free them first. After a time which felt like hours for her she finally managed to get her mane into the ribbon. It wasn’t pretty at all, the ponytail looked hideous. Lose strands of hair, dishevelled and untidy. With a sick she pushed the plank to release the hooks and they snapped back. To her dismay with so much force, that they dug into her hair, entangling Applejack again. She was impatient with this construction before and had moaned and grumped, but now it was too much. “That darn thin’ is goin’ ta rip ma scalp off!” She cussed and pulled on the frame almost tilting it over. “Stop moving Miss Applejack!” Profit shouted. “We’re going to help you.” With the combined effort of all 4 of them, in the end they had needed Flash’s magic to untie the tiny knots around the hooks, she finally was free again. Applejack scowled at the fierce machine and turned around with a loud snort. “That forsaken contraption not only nearly ripped ma mane off, it’s bulky and highly impractical as well. Y’all should use it ta fire your oven.” Her judgement was harsh and final, making Profit gulp. “Of course, of course we will. I’m terribly sorry for your inconvenience Miss Applejack.” The object of disturbance was quickly put away from sight, while Profit budged in apologetically. “I hope you aren’t mad at us Miss Applejack, we would hate to anger such a fine mare like you.” He forced back his professional smile. “Nah, Ah’m fine. Nothing bad happened at all, but ya’ll should make sure to test these things better beforehoof. That was a real big flaw, should have been noticed way earlier.” Well, a honest opinion wasn’t always the thing somepony wanted to hear. “Ah just hope the next one don’t try ta eat me alive.” She said with a wink, trying to force her mood back to reasonable levels. “We have just one more thing we like to try you out.” Profit promised. Flash and Spot had unpacked an even larger construction this time. It was a four legged trestle almost twice the size of a pony. She saw several ropes and clamps and a plank to operate the machine. “That doesn’t look very promisin’.” She said sceptically her eyebrow rose. “It sure looks intimidating, but I affirm you that it is safe. It shall help ponies to put on dresses and other clothing. You fix it with the clamps and the rubber-ropes pull the clothing outward to let you slip in more easily. It is pulled upward, you place yourself under it and rise to your back hooves.” He explained the machine thoroughly. Well the basic idea was to stay on two legs, and rise the front ones in the air. Loosing the mechanism with the plank on the ground and the dress would be pulled down. Easy in theory. Applejack had attached a simple yellow dress on every clamp and was pushing the plank to inch it up slowly. So far it worked. The ropes opened the clothing and all she had to do was rearing up beneath it and press the other plank to release it. “And y’all sure it’s safe?” she asked again already under the swinging dress above her. “Yes indeed Miss Applejack.” Was Profit’s promising response. She gulped and reared up, front hooves high in the air. She struggles to keep her balance while she reached for the plank. When she finally got it pressed down the dress come above her and got somehow stuck. The weights were pulling her down and she couldn’t push through the dress. “What in tarnation?!” she shouted and tried to keep her balance on just two hooves. It didn’t take long until she lost that battle and ripped through the ropes binding her completely with the remains of this crazy machine. She twisted and shook herself only to get her tied up more. “Ah promise ta make y’all regret tying me up!” she shouted angrily at the frame and started to kick around blindly, breaking the frame, adding more debris to the mess. Meanwhile Profit and his companions came to the decision that they might not be wanted here anymore, not knowing that the enragement of the mare was targeted almost exclusively on the device. So instead of helping the wild kicking pony they packed their supplies in amazing speed and departed quickly. The only thing what was left was a cursing Applejack and a small wallet with Bits. Several minutes later she stood panting in the middle of broken planks, ripped clothing and torn ropes. The orange mare looked around wildly, ready to buck in some teeth, or at least give them the scolding of a lifetime. To her dismay nopony was left and she was all on her own. “Now that’s a bunch of cowards.” She huffed and kicked another peace of wood frustrated. “And now Ah have ta clean up that mess all by maself.” She walked around the place of disaster and found the pouch with Bits. “At least they kept their word for paying me.” She picked her salary up, glaring one more time at the debris with a sigh. She would have to get her carriage to remove all of it. She had always said it. Most of the inventions to ‘ease the life” were a waste in the best and a threat to limb and live in the worst.