Big Mac
It was finally dark by the time we got back home. The streetlight in the driveway had just flickered on, and the hum was blending in with the sound of bugs and frogs. I gave Lime the keys to let Winona out, and Winona was already at the door and would have knocked Lime on her ass if she hadn't been used to it happening every time she came over.
"Love you too, jeez." Lime was scratching Winona's cheeks before she ran out to me in front of the shed.
Lime was following behind and walked into the shed as the light came on. The girls' stuff was piled up in here, but it mostly just the Rainboom's practice amps and drums. AJ had moved a couch out here, and Lime, with Winona joining her, had made themselves at home and had already pulled out the reclining seat.
We went to the shed mostly out of habit as we would play games, write, or draw stuff out here all the time. I had brought my notebooks and manuals in with me, but I didn't even want to think about, look over or show Lime any of the stuff for the club right now. Again, it was just habit.
Neither of us said a thing as we sat there. Lime let out her hand, and I'm still not sure if it was unconscious or not. There was a scab on the knuckle, and a bruise had blended in with the gray of her skin. Again, just silence as she stared out the window and let Winona get herself situated.
Lime opened her mouth about to say something as she leaned back into the couch, but Winona snorted and pressed against her.
"Gosh, you are spoiled," came out instead.
She looked over at me, and all I could do was laugh. For a second, it felt like it hadn't been forever since we had just hung out, but neither of us knew what to do now.
We eventually stopped, and her face returned to its usual. She's often hard to read, but she seemed a little disappointed.
Limestone
A part of me wanted to explain everything then and there, but I was so worried I'd ruin the night even more. How would I explain to him that I threw a tantrum? A now, apparently, grown-ass woman getting mad over something she made not being perfect.
Big Mac had bigger problems going on right now. He was the only one willing to let me know what was going on in the first place. My sisters sure as hell didn't. I don't even know why I'm still so mad over that. What could I have done? Does me knowing change anything? Can I even do something? They're just standing on the precipice of the damn world ending and doing something about it! What am I even doing?
I could feel my nostrils warm-up and a pressure in my cheeks as I looked over at Big Mac. He looked like he wanted to say something. He's always so easy to read.
I could hear it in my head, "What's up?" "What happened?" "You good?"
It was almost the same thing Maud did earlier before we left. She just stood in the doorway after I had just got done yelling at myself. All I could do was hide my hand and the aftermath behind me as we stared at each other down.
"Idiot!" "Moron!" "You can't do anything right!" "You can't even do basic tasks!" "Retard!" "That's all I am!" I shouted every stupid thing I've ever been called until my throat was raw.
She probably could have heard every word before she came to the shed, but she didn't say anything. She couldn't see the remains of the thing I claim to love doing strewn across the floor. She didn't see the red in my spit that I had just wiped on the back of my work jeans.
As soon as I thought that, he turned away and spoke, "I'm sorry."
"What?" I just lifted my eyebrow at that one. "Dude, you didn't even do anything."
All he did was turn away and cusp his hands, and all I could do was wait for him to follow up.
Big Mac
I ain't equipped to deal with any of this. I've been hearing that phrase a lot lately. Ain't even sure what to the Princess Twilight was doing over here, but Celestia was speaking to her about something or other. I was helping Granny when I overheard, "We are not equipped to handle any of this."
Lime was looking over at me again like earlier. Her brow was slightly more relaxed as usual and was clearly waiting for me to explain. There was so much running through my head. All I wanted to do was ask what happened. If she was okay. Yet my mind just wanted to say other things
All I could say was, "Sorry, I've just been making it weird all night."
I wonder how my sister's friends deal with stuff so easily sometimes. I feel like I can't deal with anything lately. Just today I had to tell Trixie, Snips, and Snails I was busy with something. It wasn't wrong, Granny had asked me to help her after, but I chose to do that instead. Graduation is coming up here soon, and I was going to do something with the club before the year ends.
It's so stupid, but I just can't stand to think about, pardon my language, magic shit anytime at all. There are days I just don't want to go to school. It feels like I can't even talk to nobody. I know my sister's friends are at the front of all this, but they just don't seem to care. Actually, it's like everybody else just keeps trucking along.
Winona moved closer to Lime, and she wrapped her arm around Winona, putting her bruised hand in full view.
Lime was the reason the club even existed in the first place. She drove me to do a lot back when she was still in school. It's like I was always right behind her in everything.
Limestone
God, I didn't know what to do. I should have just explained right then, since it was right in his view. Hell, I probably wanted to just explain in the first place. I really didn't know. I just wanted to ask how he was doing. That's all I wanted.
He was rubbing his hands against his pants. The wind was getting a bit stronger, and we could hear the limbs hitting the sides of the buildings outside.
"I miss you a lot lately. All that keeps coming to mind is that I wish you were still there with me. Maybe that you'd know what to do or say. Maybe I could actually do something because I don't even know how to ask what I want to right now."
"Same dude," was the first thing to come to mind.
I got to thinking back to walking in with Maud and going to the kitchen. She didn't say anything as I took a seat at the kitchen table.
Marble was at the kitchen table drawing something, and she was so hyper-focused that her tongue was sticking out and was leaning over the table
I asked, "What you drawing, kiddo?"
She finally noticed me and stuck her tongue out at me for calling her "kiddo." Sliding her drawing over to me, I forgot what had happened earlier. I looked over it, and it was so cool. It was something involving one of her characters that she was telling me about. I kind of wish I could just do that sometimes.
"That's really cool."
She gave me a thumbs up, and I returned one of my own.
Marble smiled at me and returned to what she was doing.
"I'm gonna go out and wait for Big Mac," was the last thing I said, and I nearly ran outside. Maud probably asked what I was doing, but I had already shut the door behind me.
Seeing her drawing hurt. Which I still feel so stupid about. Why? I am happy that she gets to be happy. All I do is freak out whenever I put anything to stone.
What are my sisters going to say to me when they find out what I called myself. If Maud heard, she's probably going to bring it up with them. God.
He was looking over at me again.
Then I remembered Big Mac did the same thing I did, or that I got that gesture from him. I don't even remember how, but he saw me drawing something and did that. Y'know, he just... does that Big Mac thing and said, "that's cool," and gave me a thumbs up.
Big Mac
She sat there with her mouth open, and her brow wrinkled a bit.
"I got mad at myself today." Her voice was raspier than usual as she finally tried to speak at full volume.
Back to silence except for the window rattle.
?
"Wanna talk about it?"
We looked at one another.
"Yeah."
"Yup."