“Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace…”
After reading so many romance novels with this overdone yet objectively impactful cliche, (and all the heartbreak this wedding had already offered her) Twilight was ecstatic to finally be able to partake in this trope.
“WE OBJECT!”
The sight of three unkempt Elements of Harmony kicking open the double doors of the castle made every guest gasp and rise to their hooves. Everypony except the apparent bride, who was currently seething behind her bridal veil.
Princess Cadance: the true Princess Cadance, not at full strength, but empowered more than the impostor was expecting, landed menacingly in front of the trio, eyes full of fire.
“That princess again, of all places…” The impostor growled, ripping off her veil as her eyes glowed green with rage. Princess Celestia looked at her as though she grew a second head.
“I found you, faker,” Cadance took a step forward challengingly, before pointing a hoof at not-Cadance.
“Faker? I think you’re the fake royalty here. You’re comparing yourself to me? Ha! You’re not even good enough to –”
“I’LL MAKE YOU EAT THOSE WORDS!”
Cadance lunged at the doppelganger, and in a gout of emerald flame, the impostor revealed her true colors: a gigantic, towering changeling, as tall as Celestia herself. Who then emitted a burst of magic, causing Shining’s eyes to glow green, drool sopping from his lips.
Then the city shield disappeared, and all Tartarus broke loose.
The entirety of Canterlot was now getting swarmed by dive-bombing changelings. Most of the crowd screamed and rushed out of the ceremony hall, nearly trampling each other. Princess Luna sprang into action first, attempting to blast the changeling queen with magic… only to be deflected by three changelings, who each turned into copies of Shining Armor, whose shields were insanely powerful even when copied.
Cadance and Princess Celestia were both facing off against the queen – whose name was revealed to be Chrysalis since Twilight overheard her monologuing mid-fight. She’d consider how that’s actually a very efficient way to monologue, for a villain, if the fate of Equestria wasn’t in the balance. Queen Chrysalis’s strength was vast, likely due to her sapping both Shining and Cadance of most of their power, but that wasn’t Twilight’s prerogative currently.
No, her attention was on the impromptu family reunion currently happening on the floor.
“Shiner? C’mon, big guy, Equestria needs you!” Her father, Night Light was frantically shaking Shiny by his shoulders, while both her mother and Spike tried to pull him away to safety, “Shining? Shining!”
“Dad! Dad, you need to go!” Twilight yelled out as she sprinted towards them, “Please, it’s not safe!”
“I can’t. I can’t let both of you walk into something like this again, my heart can’t take it!”
“Honey, please!” “Mr. Light, c’mon!”
Oh, Twilight was going to hate herself for days over what she was about to do.
Encapsulating her parents in a protective bubble, her dad found himself being whisked away from his son, along with her mom and Spike. Slamming his front hooves onto the walls and begging Twilight to let him go, the unicorn held back tears as she levitated them to safety, on a distant rooftop.
“I’m sorry, dad! I swear, we’ll fix this!”
Catching her breath from the exertion of levitating three ponies over a long distance, Twilight turned towards the rest of the fight.
Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash were working in tandem to carve a path for the Cutie Mark Crusaders to run away. Pinkie was throwing pies from behind a table, while Fluttershy hid behind that same table, shakily offering pies to Pinkie.
Twilight did her best to fend off the hordes of changelings, magic erupting from her horn even as her entire body burned from the strain. All of that came to a halt, however, when there was a bang, and then a clatter, as Princess Celestia fell to the ground unconscious with a burnt horn.
Twilight didn’t know what to do or think, looking down at her fallen mentor. The next words fell out of her mouth automatically.
“We need to get the Elements of Harmony!”
With the Ponyville foals evacuated, Twilight shook herself out of her trance and attempted to gallop out the doors with the rest of the girls, already mapping out the way to the royal treasury. If only it had been that easy.
“Oh, I don’t think I’ll be letting you make the attempt! Now perish!”
Seeing their retreat, Queen Chrysalis disengaged from the fight with Cadance, and all Twilight heard was the doors slamming in front of them, and then a bolt of magic, and then a ladylike gasp, and then...!
“NO!”
A prismatic contrail blasted past Twilight and intercepted the eldritch blast meant for Rarity.
Twilight froze as Rainbow Dash landed on the tiled floor with a thud. Her wings and legs twitched involuntarily, her eyes struggled to focus on anything, and her coat was seared around her chest. It was a direct shot to the heart.
Rarity immediately fell to her wife’s side, stuttering about how she was to blame, and how it was supposed to be her, and trying to apply pressure to the wound. Her white hooves stained red. Mascara and tears ran down her face like heavy rain.
“Dashie, please, please get up – We still need to save the day, a-and smooch the ladies, and make the sickest of contrails…!”
“It’s a wedding, not a Wonderbolt exhibition…” Rainbow Dash laughed weakly, offering a smile to Rarity. She was still twitching.
It only made Rarity sob harder.
Queen Chrysalis, that absolute egomaniac just broke out into a maniacal laugh, and was even about to go into a heartsong before Cadance pounced on her from behind and resumed the fight. As magic blasts and chairs were hurled everywhere, and changelings continued to flood the room, Fluttershy yanked Rarity away and started assertively ripping up a tablecloth to apply first aid to Rainbow’s wound.
Twilight was sorely tempted to jump back into the fray to help Cadance, but with Rainbow here, she knew she needed to protect her friends. She gathered up her magic to create her own shield bubble around her friends while the pegasus was tended to, the walls quickly rising around them...
...Except Rarity vaulted over her half-generated shield at the last second.
“Rarity, no!” Applejack scrambled to go grab her, before Pinkie pulled her back into the shield. And all they heard before the shield completed was:
“Rarity, yes.”
Cadance’s eyes danced wildly in every direction as Chrysalis attacked her with an onslaught of illusions, bio-magicks, and arcana. Flapping her wings over a web shot, before ducking under a magic missile, Cadance levitated and smashed a vase into Chrysalis’s face, and got a scowl and a serpentine hiss in response.
Then, out of the corner of her eye, she saw a new contender. Not Princess Luna, who was still fending off hordes of changelings from completely overwhelming the hall, but a white unicorn with mascara running down her face and blood on her hooves.
“My name is Rarity Dash.”
Her horn shimmered, and dozens of gemstones erupted from the bridesmaids’ dresses, orbiting lazily around her.
“You hurt my wife.”
The gemstones suddenly sharpened and aimed towards Chrysalis. One of them elongated to the length of a sword.
“Prepare to die.”
Rolling her envy-green eyes, the changeling snarled and let loose another blast of magic, with the same level of power that knocked Cadance’s auntie out, and injured Rainbow Dash.
Rarity deflected it, with the reflective flat of the sword-gem. CLANG.
Chrysalis growled and shot three more times.
CLANG.
CLANG.
CLANG.
Rarity’s fury tempered into focused, murderous intent. She walked forward slowly.
“My name is Rarity Dash. You hurt my wife. Prepare to die.”
Cadance watched as Chrysalis grew more furious at the alabaster mare. More energy blasts, and this time, a few other spells.
CLANG.
CLANG.
SNKT!
Rarity wasn’t even phased by the carriage-sized adhesive webbing that she’d just cut in half. Instead, she approached Chrysalis with more thunder in her step.
“Who even are you, pony?!”
“I’ll repeat myself once more: my name is Rarity Dash, you hurt my wife, prepare to die!”
As sword parried horn and gems whirled into lethal action, Cadance suddenly felt even more invigorated now. With every strike, with every low growl of Rarity seeing red, the magic of love flooded out from the furious unicorn and saturated the room like cinnamon in a dry mouth.
With more strength in her now than before the fight even started, Cadance double-checked that Rarity would survive this duel (and, judging by how frustrated Chrysalis was getting, Rarity was winning), and then galloped towards her broken husband.
“Shiny, please wake up…” Cadance pleaded, picking his body up and looking into his vacant expression.
Nothing.
Tearing up, Cadance embraced him tightly and poured her magic into him. Her love, her affection, all her memories with him. The best of times, the worst of times, everything. Everything from when he proposed, to her first date, to the Playcolt magazines he thought he hid so well, everything in her heart was shared with him.
“Wha… Where am I?”
Pulling back with a startle, Shining Armor looked at his surroundings confusedly, holding his head.
Then, he blanched at the mare who currently had Chrysalis pinned behind a spell shield, whacking away at it with an even bigger gem-sword than before.
“And how do I recruit that mare into the Royal Guard?”
He shook his head.
“Nevermind. Cady, I don’t have enough power for the spell,” he said, already springing into action, even after weeks of brainwashing. One of the many reasons she loved him. His magic crackled and fizzed around his horn, but even as he put his all into it, there wasn’t even a spark of a shield.
“It’s okay. I’ve got you.”
And as their eyes locked, Cadance allowed magic to flow through her, becoming a nexus of all the love she’s felt since returning and turning it into a magic all its own. Not only all her own love, which was already plentiful – but the love of everypony around her.
She pressed her horn against his own, and light filled the city.
“Ugh… hate the smell of hospitals…”
Rainbow Dash blinked, before practically vaulting out of bed.
“RARITY!”
Then, she yelped and tripped over her hospital blanket, flank-over-face. Luckily, she was caught by the prettiest girl in the world.
“I’m right here, darling. Everything’s okay now.”
Rainbow paused and looked around. Looks like everypony was here for when she woke up, including the royal family.
“Saved Equestria?”
“Saved Equestria.” Princess Celestia nodded.
“Am I best mare at the wedding?”
“You can be, if Spike wants to give up best man.” Shining Armor looked to the dragon.
“After all that? Totally.” Spike gave a thumbs up. “I’ll even give you my speech.”
Rainbow eyed her shaved chest, her coat gone from where she was hit. Cool stitches.
“Can I get that arrow heart tattoo I’ve always wanted?”
“Now you’re pushing it.” Rarity rolled her eyes, and then kissed her.
In the end, it was the second-best wedding Rainbow Dash has ever attended.