On the small planet of Sontar, the fight of the century was taking place.
A Temporal Royal and an alicorn were taking part in the sparring match that took place whenever diplomats from another planet came by. Cheering was abundant as various weapons clashed, lasers fired, and confetti flew from the arena. The fact that confetti was involved confused the audience, but they were excited nonetheless.
The spectacle was immaculately violent. The alicorn would fly around the dome, blasting a blasts of pure magic from her horn, while the Temporal Royal would dodge them with ease, going faster than the blink of an eye. At some point the alicorn had decided getting up close and personal with her fellow diplomat would yield better results, and she used her Earth Pony strength to strike her opponent. The Temporal Royal, meanwhile, was seemingly conjuring various items from thin air. At one point an entire cannon was conjured by the pink fiend, though it only fired out the aforementioned confetti. That was enough in order to blind the alicorn momentarily, letting the Temporal Royal get a few quick hoofstrikes in before running once more.
The weapons provided, while used initially, were soon discarded, with each combatant preferring their own method of battle. However, at some point, the alicorn managed to cast a spell that caused the weapons to seemingly come alive while she kept blasting magic at her companion. The Time lord dismantled each one using nothing but party supplies that came from seemingly nowhere. Chainsaws became jammed by noisemakers, blunt weapons were held inside balloons, and she somehow managed to take down 5 swords with nothing but a single used-up party popper. Everyone in the room was extremely impressed, seemingly including the alicorn.
The roars of the crowd just grew louder and louder with each spell cast, each streamer thrown, each time the alicorn flew by their seat, and each time the Temporal Royal ran by their seats (which was especially impressive when she ran in front of the topmost seats directly on the protective shield). The battle raged on with both diplomats giving it everything they had.
And yet, no blood was spilt.
That would change soon, as the two ponies wore each other down. Soon, they would look at each other with determination. The purple alicorn stared with a cold gaze, seemingly calculating every move the pink one could possibly make. The pink Temporal Royal gave a wide smile, akin to a predator baring its fangs at its prey, except the joy portrayed seemed playful rather than hungry. The two then came at one another with their bare hooves, fighting, thrashing, hoofing each other in the face, placing bucked hindlegs in their sides, and overall savagely brawling.
Eventually, the purple one stopped dead in her tracks, allowing both mares to catch their breath. The pink one was bleeding from her nose, her smile having waned in favor of exhaustion lying on the ground. This was the moment of truth. The blood was bled, but would the battle be over? Or would the fight continue? The alicorn answered this question soon enough, seizing the opportunity to go down to the level of the Temporal Royal...
And kissed her straight on the lips.
As the two embraced each other, cheers erupted. There were a good number of reasons as to why. For one thing, it meant that they had resisted the temptation to fight to the death, as that meant the glorious empire of Sontar would soon have both of these extremely powerful beings as allies for as long as their lifespans would allow, potentially forever in the alicorn's case. Another, finding passion such as this on the battlefield was quite uplifting, even for a species that didn't really have anything equivalent to romance. And most of all, they were glad the fight was over for one more... Immediately important reason.
The shields were starting to break.
Some time later, Pinkie and Twilight were invited to a ceremony to honor the battle. Although, of course, they had plenty of... Concerns about what just happened, it still felt like the best course of action to accept the offer, and in what universe would Pinkie let them turn down a party? They were both a bit flustered by the kiss, and exhausted from the huge fight, so maybe a celebration of any sort was in order.
The ceremony reminded Twilight of her coronation as princess, with various Sontarans on either side of a long walkway with Sontar Prime herself right at the end of it. As the mares went up to the local princess, they felt the majesty exuded by her pride. It wasn't quite as awe-inspiring as whenever Princess Celestia did something similar, but it was fairly close. The clone army in attendance all had a rather... Intense smile about them, brows burrowed and seemingly waiting for another blood match, but Pinkie assured Twilight that was just how a Sontaran normally smiled when not taking pride in themselves.
"Congratulations, my little Gaians," Sontar Prime announced. "You have passed our trial! In your combat, you have not only put on a GLORIOUS performance, WORTHY OF SONTAR-"
SONTAR-HA! SONTAR-HA!
"-But you have also shown that you truly did come without a drive for power or influence, but rather true diplomacy. Otherwise, you would have likely killed one another in order to gain more influence within your own hierarchy. We would respect it, don't get us wrong, but we would much rather face a more blood-thirsty country akin to that on the battlefield. That is how our GLORIOUS, centuries-long, still-waging war was started with our most beloved of enemies, THE RUTANS!" She gestured towards a tapestry depicting a green jellyfish thing clashing its sword(?) with a Sontaran, resulting in a lot of jeering. Twilight was a bit unnerved by the fact that it felt more like they were booing an enemy hoofball team than a people they were waging war with, as if the deaths caused from centuries of war was no more important than that.
Nevertheless, Twilight felt glad that Equestria, or any nation on Gaia, for that matter, was not going to go on their likely-thousands-of-names-long list of "beloved enemies." She still had one, rather pressing, question. "Your highness, "she began, "may I ask a question?"
Sontar Prime nodded. "You may."
"When the red sun affected me and Pinkie... Why did we end up kissing each other?"
The Sontarans suddenly erupted in a myriad of snickers, all stifled with various levels of successful. This included Sontar Prime herself, and she was decidedly in the "less than successful" category. "In truth," the royal Sontaran began after calming herself down, "we only allowed our glorious red sun shine upon you up to the point where you started going for the weapons. Much longer than that would have caused irreversible psychological damage, and that would not be good for relations with anyone if we did that to diplomats. We only raise the sun at all as to ensure that you are ready and willing to battle! After that, the adrenaline and the heat of the moment, as well as you not realizing the sun was no longer effecting you, would do the rest of the work.
"As for your question, the sun only affected you for a short while, but even if it did enough to scar you it wouldn't effect your base desires. If you were in love, for example-" She gave a smug grin upon the word love- "It would make you want to face your lover in glorious combat as a feat of pure passion. Of course, those feelings would carry over even after the red light had lifted, but how you reacted to those feelings was all dependent upon you. Therefore, when you embraced one another after the condition of spilling blood was met... Well, that came from within you."
The Equestrian and the Gallifreyan both blushed, their cheeks becoming a darker shade than the rest of their coat. "So," Pinkie said, in a rare occurrence of being nearly (emphasis on nearly) speechless, "when you have feelings of really really REALLY wanting a certain somepony to go put on their cleats and trample over you, that's the sun bringing out your feelings for them?"
Sontar Prime's eyes became a bit wider upon hearing that, and another round of snickering came from the crowd. "Well, normally it doesn't manifest in *that* way unless you're already into something like that, but yes."
And with that, for the first time in this generation since she was a filly, Pinkie was completely speechless as her cheeks went from dark pink to red.
She quickly changed the subject. "Okie-dokie-lokie then! We'll be sure to be on our way, as soon as I have my Party Box and my pet alligator back."
Gummy, for his part, was standing next to Sontar Prime, a small medal with the Sontaran cutie mark upon it hanging around his neck. He licked his eyeball.
Pinkie blinked. "Wait, what?"
Gummy blinked in turn.
"You're playing a prank, right?"
Gummy blinked again.
"But you can't stay on Sontar! I need to get home, and I'm not going without you!"
Another blink.
"Oh, don't you quote Coltaire at me, mister!"
Yet another blink.
"Unless what?"
"Unless," Sontar Prime said, interrupting the riveting one-sided conversation, "you bring with you an ambassador of our own for a much longer visit."
Gummy blinked again.
"Ohhhhhh," Pinkie said, squinting. "So you don't actually want to stay here, you just want somepony else to tagalong, right?"
Gummy licked his eye.
"... Alright, but only if Twilight agrees."
Twilight, who was confused along with everyone else on Sontar about the conversation aside from Sontar Prime and Pinkie, and Twilight had doubts about Sontar Prime, took a moment to respond. "Well, showing your kind Equestrian values of friendship does sound like a good idea, so I'm all for it."
Pinkie inhaled through her teeth, clearly worried about letting a Sontaran come to Equestria. "Alright then," she hesitated, "we guess we'll do it."
Cheering erupted from the crowd before Sontar Prime settled them down. "Very well, I shall send you with somepony whom I think you'll get along well with." Then, a Sontaran unicorn carrying a shovel walked up the aisle.
Sontar Prime just sighed. "Not you, Strax."
The dejected Sontaran sulked back into the crowd.
Sontar prime whispered to the two diplomats. "I know she's excited and that she's a fantastic nurse, but we want to make a good first impression, and she's rowdy and excitable even by our standards." Pinkie shuddered at the idea of a Sontaran that was too intense for the species that lived and breathed "intense."
"Now then, if Sothom could come up to meet her new guides to Gaia?"
A Sontaran earth mare with round glasses and a satchel, presumably Sothom, walked up to the pair of Equestrians. As she did so, a magic aura forceably gave her a shovel to carry. She looked in the direction of Strax, who simply waved with an un-Sontaran-like smile. The Sontaran diplomat just rolled their eyes, but seemingly accepted the gift anyways.
"Forgive her, your highness," Sothom said, bowing bowing towards the planet's ruler. "She is my closest... Comrade, I suppose is the term, and she wanted to give me a parting gift as a sign of good luck."
Sontar Prime merely nodded. "No apologies are necessary, Sothom. I'm fairly certain the Gaians will find that endearing, anyways."
Pinkie and Twilight both nodded, though Twilight was fairly certain if she nodded at the pace as Pinkie she would break her neck.
Sontar Prime continued. "Sothom here is one of our war song writers, which allow for our most successful combats due to the comradery they inspire. We realize, with your kind's emphasis on your individuality, that your planet likely has many artists, likely to enhance your own weaponry!"
The two friends gave each other exasperated glances. "Sure," they said in unison.
"Ergo," Sontar Prime continued, undeterred, "an artist of our own would be a perfect fit! Plus, you'll be happy to know she is also the proud author of Sontar's thus far only published book, personal journals aside." The crowd responded with thunderous applause, although no chanting yet.
Sothom pulled out a book from her satchel. "It is a collection of the various compositions I and many, many other Sontarans have made in order to better serve the war effort through our energizing tunes, powering our weapons and bringing Sontaran-kind to even further glory!"
SONTAR-HA! SONTAR-HA!
Ah, there it was.
Twilight bowed before the planet's local princess. "We are honored that you are our first ally from beyond our own planet, and honored further that you have sent a representative of your own kind, and that you have the foresight to choose a diplomat that could relate to us. I know it's going to be a tough road for our cultures to get to know each other. Ours is a world of peace, while you all prefer war. But I believe that it will be worth it! One day, the Sontarans can learn to... Tolerate peace, and the Gaians can learn the ways of war." She decided to play up the strength the two planets had. "When we combine our strengths, we shall overcome our weaknesses, and become stronger in our unity! We shall be unstoppable, and we shall live in glory!"
SONTAR-HA! SONTAR-HA! SONTAR-HA! SONTAR-HA!
This was going far better than what happened with Yakistan.
With that out of the way, Pinkie decided to speak up, having noticed the Party Box being brought into the ceremony. "Well, thank you, everyone! Now, Twilight, Sothom, Gummy and I need to get going! Thank you for having us, please don't make us fight each other again, I left you some party supplies so you can have fun, thank you thank you THANK YOU!" With that, she grabbed the other three Gaia-bound souls, putting Gummy into her hair, and rushed into her TARDIS.
"By the Princess' beard," Sothom softly said once they were inside, visibly awe-struck. "The legends were true. It truly is bigger on the inside. You could fit a whole army in this one box. Think of the tactics we could use..."
And with the sound of a party blower, that familiar whirring sound ruminated throughout the ceremony room
Before they went to Gaia they made a stop in the dead of space, just to get themselves oriented... That, as well as Twilight and Pinkie having a lot to talk about.
"Alright, first order of business," Twilight began. "What do we do with Sothom?"
Pinkie pondered for a moment. "Well, right now she's in the combat training room next to the Ferris Wheel room, but as for what to do with her... I think having her be in Canterlot is the best call. Right near the royal guards and princesses if she causes any trouble, and it's a hubbub of Equestrian culture so she'll have an easier time talking with other diplomats from different countries. She'd probably get along with Prince Rutherford when he comes by."
Twilight nodded, not wanting to distract from the more personal questions she had. "So, Pinkie... About that kiss."
A deafening silence hung in the air before Twilight spoke again with a nervous grin.
"...Did you like it?"
Pinkie looked straight at Twilight, grasped her face, and went in for another kiss. The kiss was long and passionate, leaving a flustered Twilight flailing before she embraced the sensation and kissed back.
Pinkie had just one thing to say once their lips parted. "Does that answer your question?"
"Marry me."
"What?"
"What?"
Pinkie gave Twilight a hug. "Calm down, silly filly! We only just had our first date!"
"First da-" Twilight facehoofed as they broke their embrace. "Oh, yeah. What a fantastic first date where we could have potentially killed each other."
Pinkie giggled, but soon after her expression seemed to get a bit more... Solemn. "I'm not sure if it would work out in the long run, though."
Twilight was taken aback by this. "Why not?"
Pinkie just sighed. "Lifespan differences."
Twilight's expression became more sorrowful as well. "Oh, yeah..."
"I mean," Pinkie continued, "I'm going to live for thousands and thousands of years, while you... You're just going to grow old and die over time in less than a hundred. It would be just a small drop of sand in the hourglass of my life. And what about when I regenerate? I'll be a completely different person! Well, not completely, but I'm going to have a whole new look and personality. So... It just wouldn't work between u-"
Twilight burst out laughing, tears in her eyes. Pinkie was confused. "What's so funny, Twily?"
Twilight calmed down, but she was still crying, though now these tears weren't of laughter. "Pinkie, I don't like to talk about this, but... I'm immortal now. All alicorns are. I could survive until the end of the universe, and maybe even beyond that if Discord can be trusted, though that isn't likely to be honest. I've been worried sick about losing all six of my best friends over time. But knowing you're going to live for thousands of years... That makes me feel so much better knowing at least one of my friends is going to live out a long life alongside me, whether it's as more than friends or not."
Now both mares were crying, but at the same time their smiles were both wide enough to fit a slice of watermelon into. They hugged each other once more weeping into each other's shoulders. "Twily," Pinkie choked out through her tears, "this is the best news I've ever heard. I love you so much!"
Twilight managed to speak through the tears without too much shakiness in her voice. "I love you too, Pinkie."
"I love you too."
"So when I was so worried about the future that I needed a time travel spell," Twilight asked, "you knew how to time travel the whole time?"
"Yeppareeno! Was still trying to keep it a secret at the time, buuuuuut I think you learned the big lesson better than if I used my Party Box."
Twilight laughed. "True enough, Pinkie. And you're sure your Pinkie Sense has nothing to do with being a Time Lord? It would make sense if your ability to detect time distortions was changed when you got here."
"Nope! Been there, done that! No tests I've done have proven anything, and this is TIME LORD tech we're talking about! You didn't have a chance of figuring it out! All the other weird things I do aren't related to it either. I thought my mane might have a TARDIS inside it, but nope! It's just really good at holding things."
Both laughed again as Sothom entered the room. "There you two are! I swear, this place needs a battle strategy so we can get around much easier."
The two long-living ponies glanced at each other before turning their gaze back to the Sontaran. "You mean a map," Twilight corrected.
"Well, yes, but also a strategy in case your 'Party Box' is invaded by an invading force like the Rutans! A map might actually be good in a battle strategy, actually. Maybe that's why I'm not a general. In any case, I did want to enquire when we were landing on your planet?"
Pinkie suddenly jolted up into the air. "I COMPLETELY FORGOT! Strap in everypony! This is gonna be a bumpy ride! Next stop, Canterlot!" Quickly, she grabbed the two other passengers and brought them to the control room. She quickly started meddling with controls, popping party poppers, and seriously what are those noisemakers you see at New Year's parties called?
"Ooh! You mean a ratchet?"
A rat- furious typing intensifies ... Huh. Thanks, Pinkie!
"No problemo, amigas!"
Sothom quickly turned to Twilight, trying to keep herself steady despite all of the rumbling. "Do you ever wonder if your friend has gone completely mad?"
Twilight just laughed. "Sothom, I am waaaaaaaaayyyyyyy past the point of wondering."
And with a crash, Pinkie gave a cheery "we're here!" Pinkie once again grabbed the two other mares, this time to toss them out of the Party Box.
"She doesn't do that often, does she," asked Sothom.
"Most of the time," Twilight answered, "no. Sometimes? Yeah."
They got up to their hooves right as Pinkie popped out of the box, landing on their hooves. It was then Pinkie noticed the Princesses, standing in a doorway staring with their jaws agape.
"Surprise!"
It was only after she said that that Pinkie noticed that the princesses weren't the only familiar faces present, something Twilight also picked up on.
"Girls," Twilight said, "what are you doing here?"
Both Pinkie and Twilight got caught in an avalanche of friendship, as the seven mares reunited, cheers and laughter abundant, while the princesses gave happy yet exhausted smiles at the whole affair. Sothom quickly took advantage os the situation, trotting up to the two royals.
"You two must be the princesses," she said. "My name is Sothom, and I am a proud ambassador of glorious Sontar! We have much to discuss in private."
Princess Celestia gave the warmest smile she could. "Well, this is a pleasant surprise! We have to call a meeting with our nobility anyways, so feel free to attend. For now, come walk with me and my sister. I'm more than happy to do something relaxing after the nightmare today's been."
"Indeed," came Princess Luna's proud voice. "We are looking forward to creating kinship with a new nation!"
Sothom chuckled as she followed the two Princesses. "I believe you shall find that Sontar is greater than just a mere 'nation,' and just as well, you'll find it has a long and proud history..." Her voice faded as the three disappeared deeper into the castle.
As the group had reunited, Pinkie left to have a reunion of her own, a long-awaited one for her. As Twilight caught the others up to speed, Pinkie went trotting right up to the Doctor... When she noticed something.
He seemed... Tense, as if ready to pounce at any moment. His gaze seemed unwavering... And unnerving. Worst of all, the gaze seemed directed at her, and she had no clue why.
"Hiya, Doc!" She greeted him with the same level of enthusiasm she normally would, anyways. After all, maybe he was just shaken up from being, you know, murdered. "I'm Pinkie Pie! We technically haven't met yet, buuuuuuu-"
"A Time Lord," said the Doctor with pure hatred in his voice. Silence hung in the air as Pinkie stopped mid-sentence. It was only then it hit Pinkie. The Doctor wasn't just murdered...
He was executed. Not only that, but she knew who did it.
"Uh oh."