//------------------------------// // Friendchips Are Amazing: Part Two // Story: My Little YouTube: Comedy Is.. Wait, what? // by Mr. Dr. Prof. Dim Bulb //------------------------------// ~Previously on My Little Youtube~ "I don't have time for this, I need to get back..!" Lewis yelled, throwing book before book aside in his search. ~ Spike reasoned, "The Princess arranged for you to stay in a library! Doesn't that make you happy?" ~ "IDEA, SAYS MY BRAIN." it exclaimed before dashing off with a comical dust cloud behind it. ~ “Surprise, purple pony person!” a pink pony cried out along with several other ponies from around the town. ~ “I was gonna say that, you know I-OH MY GOODNESS, PURPLE SWIRLY MIST OF DOOMDEATH.” Twilewis looked up at the strange mist appearing on the platform, his eyes turning wide as he and Pinkbuscus said in unison, “What in the HELL IS THAT?!” ~ “What did you do to the shinyhorse?! DID YOU RAPE IT?! I’LL SHOW YOU RAPE. YOU SON OF BITCH! GAAAAAAH!” Nova Dash screamed. ~ “... Oh fuck.” Egoshy whimpered. [Holy-what, theme song, holy-what, theme song, ahhhahhhahhhahhh~] The black coated mare stood high atop the balcony, laughing as her mane swirled above her in a menacingly beautiful way. Her wicked laughter echoed throughout the spacious interior of the town hall, terrifying most of the people within it and bringing about an uproar of screams and frightened gasps. Mayor Mare sprang up, determination in her eyes as several Royal Guards began to group around her. “Seize her!” she cried, “Only she knows where the Princess is!” The three royal guards leaped from their positions, flying towards the devious eyed mare as she shouted, “Stand back you foals!” and blasted bolts of lightning from her horn, searing them each at most as they all flew off in the opposite direction in defeat. After the guards had been driven back, Nightmare Moon proceeded to whisp her mane around herself and become a direct part of it, whisking herself off into the night sky to the horrified cries of ponies jumping out of the way as she slammed open the doors. The sparkling purple cloud flew off silently into the distance, though it was not flying alone. Nova Dash had just broken free from Applemon’s grip and was giving a short chase out of the building to the sparkling cloud. “COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE WHORE, I’LL SHOW YOU HOW TO STAND DOWN FROM A FIGHT... Wait..” he stopped, flying in midair as he thought about what he had just said. When he looked up again, the cloud had already passed the mountains in the distance and was on its way to somewhere far else. It was then that Twilewis walked from the building, looking about with a confused expression as he made way for an unknown location. “Where the fuck is he going?” Nova Dash wondered aloud. Spike twitched a bit on Twilewis’ back, waking up for a short moment to say, “We have to stop Nightmare...” before falling over and onto the floor of the library with a quiet thump. This did not wake him in the slightest. “Yeah, sleep well ya dolt..” Twilewis ‘cooed’ as he looked around at the everything that was surrounding him as of this moment. He went downstairs a moment later, throwing books off of their shelves in an attempt to finally get some work done on how to figure out why he’s here. To this minute, he had done little to no work on finding reasons as to what had happened, and he was itching to start. “Alright.. So.. Portals, portals, portals.. There has to be something!!” he shouted to himself, tearing through shelves before pausing and thinking to himself, ’Wait.. What about..’ “The Elements of Harmony!” Twilewis exclaimed, only jumping back in total shock of what appeared directly in front of his face a moment later. An angry and suspicious Nova Dash reared his cyan head and with an unnerved expression, shouted, “WHAT THE HELL ARE THE ELEMENTS OF HARMONY ANYWAYS?! THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?! ARE YOU A FUCKING SPY, BECAUSE I SWEAR, IF YOU ARE I will fucking cut you.” Twilewis stood in total confusion for a short moment before Applemon tugged upon Nova Dash’s tail insistently and commanded him to ‘calm his twat’. “He’s not a damned spy. But I do think he knows more than us about what’s going on here...” The entire group, Pewdie, Toby, and all, began approaching Twilewis slowly. “Don’t you, Lewis..?” Twilewis took a deep breath and then sighed. “I know you all think I know something here, though I can’t fathom why..” he admitted, “But I really know nothing about this. All I know about this world is that it’s full of shiny horse things and some kind of Elements of Who-see-what-sit.” The group stared at him for a short moment before a sound came from the other side of the room. “Elements of Harmony. Ooh, they sound so pretty!” Pinkbuscus called out, staring at a book on the shelf. “It’s under ‘E’, come over and see, so we can read all the things I see!” he declared, rhyming ‘see’ with ‘see’ like a total pro as the others gathered around to see what was happening. As they all looked into the pages of the book, Twilewis read aloud a basic...summary of what was written. “Bla bla bla, elements.. Something about one not being known.. Oh, here they are. The elements are kindness, laughter, generosity, honesty, and loyalty. And apparently they’re in some forest inside a castle or something.” The group went silent. “Stephano thinks that he should have the element of total awesomeness.” Raripie said with a small twitch, still clearly in a slight amount of shock from arriving in this world as Twilewis looked back at him with a blank face. A few others did the same before turning back to the book and shrugging a bit at the knowledge of having no idea what to do. Little did the group know though, that they were being spied upon, and that an evil force now knew of where the elements were hidden. The force whisked itself off to find these elements as the group stayed indoors, talking amongst themselves. “What if the elements give us some kind of magical powers or something?” Egoshy suggested. “What if having one in your hand made you just go all Megaman and shoot fuckin’ lemons from your hand or something!” he insisted. Raripie and Pinkbuscus agreed with his mad idea, but the other three in the group had another idea. “I vote we find ‘em and sell ‘em.” Novadash shouted above all the other’s talking. “Might as well have some money in our pockets if we’re gonna be in this world!” His logic was true, and all the others agreed that a bit of cash would be good. Though some already were in possession of money when they arrived in this world, a bit more couldn’t hurt. Everyone but Raripie looked towards the door, where Raripie was currently standing. “We have no time to waste! Quickly! Out the door into the world of magical magic! We shall find these elements and use them to defeat the barre- I mean, sell them!” he commanded, grinning happily with Stephano on his head. Everyone obeyed the command and made their way out of the house and into the street, all of them now headed for the nearest forest. Once they arrived, they all charged directly in without a care in the world. Each of them had a battle cry that they were continuously shouting. “FOR LADY GAGA!!” Raripie would scream every now and again, sometimes being drowned out by a, “RAPE THE EVERYTHING.” from Nova Dash. Meanwhile though, time was not on the side of the group. After a full twenty three seconds of endless running and shouting, nearly all of them were ready to collapse upon the ground. And so they did. Ten minutes later, they were up and at it again. Doing the exact same thing. Again. And again. And again. And when it was nearly four hours later, they had arrived at a strange place where two cliffs met and created a stone gateway of sorts. They were walking peacefully towards it when suddenly, a large beast dropped from above into their path. “FFFFFFFFFUCKSHIT-” Raripie nearly screamed, turning away and running in the other direction and in between trees with the thought of something awful. “FUCKING SLENDERMAN, TRYING TO RAPE ME ALL THE TIME. WHAT DID I DO TO YOU BRO, WHAT DID I DO TO YOU?!” he screamed continuously, running in complete circles within the trees. The entire group began to stare at Egoshy as he began to laugh madly at the creature before him. “Look at that thing! Just, HA! L-l-look at the color scheme, Lo- LOOK AT THAT HORN! ITS ALL BLACK! DID YOU PUT IT UP SOMEONES ASS OR SOMETHING?! AND THOSE ‘PAWS’! THEY DON’T EVEN HAVE ANY NAILS! WHAT IS THIS THING?! A CAT-WITH-A-SCORPION-TAIL OR SOME SHIT?” The manticore proceeded to stare at Egoshy with hate filled eyes and let out its mightiest roar in an attempt to silence the yellow character. This attempt worked tremendously well, to the shock of the group, for an entire half a second! “PFFT- THAT’S A ROAR?! COME ON, YOU’RE SITTING OVER THERE ACTING LIKE YOU WANT SOMEONE TO GO AND REFILL YOUR DAMNED KIBBLE OR SOME SHIT. COME ON, JUST- JUST COME ON! YOU’RE STANDING OVER THERE WITH YOUR, YOUR, FACE ACTING LIKE ALL, ‘OH, I’M SO TOUGH HURRR.” After three more minutes of annoying ranting from Egoshy, the manticore simply gave up and facepawed. This caused a small thorn to jab him in his eye. The manticore glared at the thorn and tugged it out angrily before walking away back to its home without another sound. And with that, the group moved along. WE WERE TOO LAZY TO WRITE THIS ENTIRE SCENE AND WANTED TO MOVE ON, BUT HERE’S WHAT TOBY WOULD’VE SANG. You silly nuggets, don’t you see? When I was back on Earth, my friends, And I was playing gaaames~ Like Dead Space, Minecraft, and Limbo, while I gave monsters naaames~ I’d shoot a gun or arrow, To prevent myself from DEATH, But brother pig would always live, A lot unlike the reeest~ And he said, Toby; ya gotta run around, Swing a diamond sword! Shoot things with laser beams, Then find a pig and climb aboard! AU-DI-ENCE. Sooo, Ride upon a piggy, Kill the Dead Space thingy, Dodge a giant spider, Start slashing even wider, Ride upon a segway, I’m Batman, do things my way, And when you see the bunnies start to kill themselves and you can’t stop them and they just keep jumping off the cliff it just makes you wanna cry out... *deep ass breath* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! THERE YA GO, LET’S MOVE ON NOW. “Well, shit.” Twilewis remarked, a large river harshly churning in front of him and the rest of the group as they emerged from a section of the forest. Raripie stared at the gushing water for a moment before exclaiming with a grin, “Well, we’re stuck, may as well go back and pretend none of this ever hap--” but his sentence, as well as his exit were cut short by a gentle punch to the shoulder from Nova Dash. “No,” he asserted, “we’re staying and we’re gonna finish this.” Nova Dash had a determined look on his face as he walked over to the river, staring directly into it. “Stop churning you piece of shit, I will end your everything if you do not calm your watery ass tits down right the fuck no-” “I don’t think that yelling at it is going to do anything..” Egoshy interrupted. “You gotta get a bunch of people doing it at once for that to work!” With that, he walked over to the river and stood beside Nova Dash, the two of them yelling at the top of their lungs at the rushing waters. While the pair yelled at the watery deeps, Raripie heard an odd sound coming from another section of the river. He popped his head through some bushes, assuming that they lead to the area that held the sound and saw something utterly strange. “Hey guys?” he yelled back, “Come see this giant purple snake thing, I think it’s fapping..!” “Fapping, what?” a few of the group members exclaimed, rushing over to see the strange sight, only to find out that it was not at all what they thought it was. “You lying little nugget! He’s just splahin’ around... because reasons! REASONS I TELL YOU!” Pinkbuscus accused, pointing a single hoof out at the creature before it noticed the groups presence. “Ooh, what a world! What a world!” it shouted, “I’ve done nothing to deserve this, you see! I was just sitting here, minding my own business when this tacky little purple cloud whipped past me and tore half of my beloved moustache right off!” AND WITH ONE BIG SPLASH A BIG TSUNAMI WASHED OVER EQUESTRIA AND THEY ALL DIED. The End Pim: WE’RE DONE. WE QUIT THIS IDEA. FOR SOMETHING BETTER. Grey: I’m sorry to quit so early into the game, but honestly? This entire thing is a serious pain to try and write. It takes way too much time, there’s so much to account for in the writing itself.. Pim: Just saying; one chapter takes three months to fucking write. That’s why we’re REMAKING the story into one with an original storyline instead of pain-in-the-ass-parodies. Sorry... But hey, it’s SORTA coming back! Grey: I mean, in all fairness, this is a great deal of fun to write. But then again, so will be all the other batshit stories we come up with. So.. Yeah. IN OTHER NEWS: TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR TOTAL. DRAMA. EQUESTRIA!~