//------------------------------// // A Flurry of emotions // Story: Artistic liberty // by MorganaTheNotCat //------------------------------// The first day of art school. Flurry Heart could feel at the judgmental looks from the students as she stepped inside. Ugh, why'd they all have to be staring so much? What, did they expect the princess to be all dolled up in a cute skirt with flying birds all over her like in fairy tales? Apparently, being different is a crime.  Nobody even attempted to talk to her as she walked down the halls. As the one and only alicorn at the school, she couldn't feel more out of place. It was supposed to be a dream come true!  The halls were filled with chatter and rumors, with an air of judgmental looks and words for the new alicorn in school. But Flurry wouldn't let any of these get to her head. She just continued to walk, giving side glances at those that passed by her. Who the hell do they think they are to be judging her like that? “I heard she didn't even need to do an entrance exam!” One mare said. “I bet somepony like her didn't even need to try…” A stallion replied.  “You think she's a good painter? Or did she get in because of her parents?” Those damn rumors, they're like a drilling in her ear. Of course, she did the entrance exam! And she's here by her own merit! She earned this, and she doesn't need to prove anything to anyone but herself.  This is what she had dreamed of, this is her life. Not the royal dignitary, or warrior her dad wants her to be. Equestria has been a Peaceful nation for like 10 years already, what's the point in her becoming a royal guard anyway? At least he let her go to art school, better than nothing. She stopped at the entrance to  her classroom, room 403. Okay, this is it. She took one deep breath and stepped forward into the room. immediately assaulted by pesky sunlight that was sure to ruin her beautiful black makeup.  A few ponies sat at stools next to canvases and easels formed in a circle. They were all entranced, their brushes gliding across the fabric, splattering ink all over the floor, creating a chaotic and colorful mess which Flurry Heart absolutely hated.  Nothing wrong with ponies wanting to express themselves. But all those saturated colors? That's not her thing. “Ah! Welcome, Princess! I almost didn't recognize you with all that make-up.” A unicorn stallion approached her, one with a large bushy mane that looked like the top half of a tennis ball, and his bushy beard was even stranger. But he sported a rather friendly looking expression behind his thick round glasses. How come he didn't recognize the ONLY alicorn in school, though? “Uh just- Call me Flurry, Professor. I don't really like the princess label.” Being a celebrity isn't always that amazing.  “Of course, no worries darling. You look great, by the way.” The stallion smiled after complimenting Flurry’s makeup, one of the very few to do so. “Come on, let's have a seat.”   “Alright…” The two headed over to a free seat; The stallion sat her down gently and helped her to some art supplies, floating them with his magic to her side.  “First of all, I'll introduce myself. I'm Cob Ross, your teacher.” A familiar name to her for some reason, perhaps she'd heard of him somewhere? It's not uncommon for great painters to become teachers. “So, today is just the first day. I want you to paint whatever you wish, since I want to have an understanding of what kind of pony you are, and what kind of things you find artistic.”  A simple request. “O-Okay. Doesn't sound too difficult.” Her head turned to face the blank canvas.  “Great, I'll leave you to it. You can call me if you need anything.” And so, he went on his merry way to greet another student. Flurry took the opportunity to glance around at her classmates to see what kind of things they were painting. One seat after the one on her right had a mare silently painting with her magic, to her left, a Stallion seemed incredibly focused on his art as he painted it with his mouth. Among the other several she caught a glimpse of, she noticed a pattern. Flowers. Ponies. Landscapes. Life. Most of them were depicting life in its most superficial state, by depicting ponies, happiness, sunshine, flowers, fruits, green pastures. Things ponies would normally paint of course, it instills a sense of security.  But Flurry wasn't like this.  There is beauty in all things, and there is beauty in dark things. There is beauty in death, there is beauty in pain, there are emotions and feelings stemming from that hidden darkness that are often forgotten about by a society which is so focused on life. She will remain true to herself.  How about a classic? This is one she had done many times, with hundreds of variations. A skull of a pony on a plain black background. Back in her castle she had a real skull she could use for her art as reference, and it was beautiful.  Someone had died, and out of that death, came art and beauty. From it, inspiration was born. She didn't have it for reference here, but after doing it so many times, it was practically muscle memory.  So her brush flowed effortlessly across the canvas. Up and down, left and right, long thin lines, or short thick curves, shape, color, beauty being created out of nothing. Art from darkness. Ah, this feeling would never get old, it was like she was entranced in her own world of pure magic, a magic of her own which was oh so special to her. So she just kept on painting… And before she even noticed it, she was done.  ‘Why does it feel like only 10 minutes? It's already been an hour…’ She thought to herself after glancing at the clock hanging from a nearby wall, before looking back at her creation. It was good, or at least she thought so. It evoked a sensation and in the end, that is what art is about, isn't it?  “A princess drawing skulls and bones. I can't believe it.” A female voice behind her made her turn her head.  It looked like a blonde unicorn with a cyan coating, it seemed she lifted her snout at the sight of Flurry, wanting to give herself an air of superiority. ‘This interaction will be fun’ Flurry thought to herself. “Your point being?” Flurry raised a brow.  “It’s just a skull.” This valley girl accent almost makes Flurry wish she could punch her in the face. “You're like, royalty. Aren't you supposed to actually be good and paint something meaningful? Take me for example.” The mare grabbed the easel under her arm and proudly showed it off.  It seemed to be that of a couple, dancing in the foreground. A lake reflected the sunlight behind them, showing off some different shades of blue. “Beautiful form, elegant use of different colors and a meaningful theme. The couple is meant to represent intimacy and care. What can you see in a random skull in some black background?”  “It's not my fault you can't see the beauty in it. That's your problem.” Flurry smirked, not being able to believe this stupid mare wanted to give opinions on her art.  “Excuse me!?” The mare took offense. “I placed first on the entrance exams. If there's somepony that knows art, it's me! Don't think black makeup makes you ‘deep’!” It's not about being deep. It's about being yourself. If her parents will force her to become a Royal, forcing their ideals on her, why's it so wrong for her to force her own ideals on them too? It's more than just a way of dressing. Nothing that a mare like her would ever understand, of course. Flurry rolled her eyes, as she continued to unwillingly listen to this annoying mare ramble on.  “Unlike you, I had to earn my way into this place. I'm sure Mommy and Daddy paid a good price for you to be here, with your skills, I doubt you even did the entrance exam.” The mare scowled at Flurry, her judgmental tone pissing her off even more. She quickly lifted  herself from her seat, her relentless stare glued to the Mare, with furrowed brows and gritted teeth.  “Well listen here, unlike you, I don't CHASE fashion trends just so I can fit in with my groupie who's only with me because I'm rich. I do my own thing because I fuckin want to, and I couldn't give a flying feather about some ‘Mommy’s girl’ opinion.” The gasps from other students echoed around the room, as they stared at the action. They couldn't believe it, she was Royalty! She was meant to act proper and gentle, delicate and caring, and yet here she was. “Chill out ‘Princess’” The mare let out a snarky giggle. “If you can't take opinions, don't be an artist. You’re talentless as is, so I guess you're halfway there!” A small crowd had gathered around the two, and were half expecting them to fight. But Flurry wouldn't give them the pleasure, she was powerful anyway. She could wipe this school without so much as breaking a sweat if she ever did train her magic powers.  “Misty! Stop bothering the princess! Do you want her parents to shut down the school or what?!” A stallion called out from the crowd to the Mare, only now did Flurry learn her name was Misty.  The surrounding ponies were overwhelming, her heart beating faster, her eyes already watering with tears. How dare they insult her like that!? To say that she only got in because of her parents?! She didn't want to let it get to her head, but it was hard to ignore. She's not a princess like the others, just what is so wrong with being yourself? Without saying a word, her eyes already swollen with tears, she rushed out the door, shoving the teacher to the ground as she passed through the doorway and sprinted down the halls.  “Still wearing that choker?” Shining sat at the opposite end of the table, he couldn't be further away from his daughter. Dinner felt as awkward as it always did, even more so now that Cadance was out on a diplomatic mission with the dragon lands. She was the one that usually understood the most about their daughter, but now, Shining didn't have that buffer. He still wanted what's best for her, but found it harder and harder to understand his teenage daughter.  “So what? I like it.” She replied quietly. Flurry was distant, both physically and emotionally. She glanced out the tall windows that lined up the dining room, staring at the sundown with a sigh while holding her chin with one hoof. She was good, she knew it. She didn't need others' approval, or at least it didn't feel like she did… So why did those comments get to her so much?  “So… how was your first day?” Shining asked again, laying down his fork and knife on the table.  “What? It was fine, whatever.” She replied reluctantly, in an annoyed tone.  “The school told me what happened.” His daughter had always been such a troublemaker but now, this behavior was getting worse. Perhaps it would've been best to homeschool her again, like she always was. “Why did you scream at them like that?”  “I didn't- Scream! It's their fault for bothering me!” Well, they did start it. She was just defending herself, there's nothing wrong with that, is there?  “Look- We are royals…” Oh dear Twilight, here he comes again with that speech. She knew it by heart by this point. “The public is counting on us. We need to exude an air of safety, control and sophistication! You understand me?”  “Whatever. What if I don't want to be a stupid princess anyway? I don't care about sophistication, or showing control or whatever. Just cause I was born an Alicorn, doesn't mean I want to be one.”  Shining sighed.  “I knew it was a bad idea to put you in that school. Your mom should've listened to me…” And here he comes, she knew this part by heart too. “You should've become a Royal guard! A captain or a general for the crystal ponies! Your magic would've been amazing in battle! I've been fooled once by the enemy, and I don't intend on ever letting my guard down again!”  “Face it Shining!” Flurry spoke loudly as she pushed her chair back with a screech, slamming her hoof on the crystal dinner table. “Equestria has been safe for how many years now? Aunt Twilight is taking care of Equestria, and it's never been safer! What happened between you and mom is in the past and you're the one who hasn't moved on!”  “Don't you dare say that!” He yelled back, he too jumped from his seat. “The changeling invasion may be in the past, but it's an example that we should always be ready for any kind of threat! I thought you'd follow my example and become a great captain, or a big dignitary like your mom, and what did you choose? Art?! Painting?!”  “I'll do whatever I WANT TO DO! AND- I SHOULD'VE- EXPECTED MY OWN DAMN FATHER TO BE THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEEDED IT!” Her loud voice echoed through the chamber, she found herself once again holding back the tears. Her family was one of the few things she could confide in, and if she didn't have that, then what?  “GAH! I HATE YOU! YOU ALWAYS ACT LIKE THIS!” Her visceral and heartbroken scream could be heard from most of the rooms of the castle, as she stomped her hoof on the ground and left the dining room, the door slamming shut behind her as she did so.  Shining was left alone in the room, his anger only settling a few seconds after his daughter left. He wasn't wrong, no… He couldn't be. He just doesn't want her to suffer what he suffered, he wants her to be successful. But as he's left alone in that dining room after yet another argument, he wonders if his girl will ever change her ways and see what he means… Or maybe he's the one that needs to change after all. Yet another dinner alone. He floated Flurry’s plate from the table and threw the food in a nearby bin. The bell rang as flurry placed down her brush and stepped out of the class. It was lunchtime. She made her way through the crowd of ponies, not even wanting to look them in the eye, but the murmurs and the voices of students passing around misinformation. Some were scared to even say her name, others would bluntly judge her at face value. The incident from yesterday was still a topic of discussion among them all, even though she just wished they'd stop even acknowledging her, much preferring they'd treat her like she didn't even exist. But whatever, at least it's not as bad as it could be.  The cafeteria was crowded with hundreds of ponies. It took her a while, but she eventually found a good place to rest and sat down. Despite last night's trouble, Shining still packed her a PB&J sandwich, one of her favorite snacks ever since she was a foal. ‘I’m sorry’ was written on a note attached to her lunchbox. It was difficult to really forgive him, why is he always so hard on her? Why can't he just be proud of what she is? Maybe he's right in saying that she should become a Royal guard. ‘Am I wrong?’ she thought to herself as she used her magic to float the sandwich into her snout, taking a chomp out of it.’No, he just doesn't get it. Maybe he will someday.’ Despite what had happened between them, she still had a place in her heart for him. Perhaps he was right about one thing. Maybe she shouldn't have come to this school after all. Despite it being her dream, it still felt so empty and meaningless. She glanced around, noticing no one dared to sit beside her, avoiding eye contact. Perhaps they still saw her as a preppy princess or were intimidated. Her disastrous first day combined with edgy outfits might explain this too. A Choker? Eyeshadow? Ear piercings? Yeah, it's more understandable. One group of ponies did approach her, but unfortunately, it seemed like they didn't want to make friends. That blonde bitch was back, and she brought company. Flurry sighed and took another bite of her sandwich, unbothered as they approached.  “Hello again, princess.” Flurry had come to learn that this annoying mare with a valley girl accent was named Misty. She was accompanied by an Earth mare with a purple coat and cyan mane and tail, as well as a grayish pegasus with red and white streaked mane and tail. They all seemed to be just as annoying as the main leader herself, your typical school bully group. Flurry Heart didn't even know an art school of all places would have these kinds of irritating bullies. But I guess when you mix a bunch of narcissistic, egotistical rich assholes into one place, you'll inevitably end up with some kind of hierarchy.  “The hell do you want?” Flurry refused to look her in the eye.  “About yesterday…” Misty added. “Think you can insult me and my art and just run off like that?!”  “Ah, so you're the monitor of opinions now. Weren’t you the one who said you can't be an artist if you don't take others’ opinions? I sure as hell don't need you telling me how to live my damn life.” Flurry took another bite out of her sandwich, which was half-eaten by this point. “Now fuck off.”  “Woah, she's got a mouth on her!” The earth mare added, while her pegasus friend giggled to herself. “I didn't know royals could be so filthy!” “Listen here, you'll never be good enough for this school. You're only here because your family pulled some strings, kay dear?” Misty leaned close. Way too close for Flurry’s liking, and while Flurry’s eyes were burning with rage, she held back her urges through her gritted teeth and quickened heartbeat. She couldn't let it get to her. She wouldn't give Misty the pleasure. “You're just a damn fraud, you actually think you have a chance here? Grow up. Life isn't as easy as it is in the castle, you gotta compete if you want to win, and you actually think I'm going to lose to some punk princess?”  This girl better keep her mouth shut. Flurry was just an inch away from her snout, with furrowed brows and a searing anger underneath her exterior. The other girls noticed this, and fearing her, they backed away. Good for them. If Misty doesn't follow their example, Flurry will not consider herself responsible for her actions… Yet this self-absorbed idiot kept on yapping. Does she think she's the center of attention? “You're nothing more than a pampered and spoiled brat, throwing tantrums whenever things don't go your way, expecting the world to cater to your every word.” Misty approached even closer, her hoof pushing against Flurry’s chest. “Must be hard seeing the world from a golden carriage, huh? You privileged wench.”  That's it, this idiot has said way too much shit. They think they can just do how they please?! They can just push her around like that?! Insult her and her family?! No, she won't tolerate this, she won't take this disrespect from a pretentious little bitch!  “BACK OFF!” She screamed at the top of her lungs, a sudden shockwave bursting out from her horn as her wings opened wide. This sent Misty flying a few good meters from Flurry, throwing her back first into one of the cafeteria’s tables, which cracked in half from the impact.  Flurry’s eyes widened as soon as she realized what happened, blood rushing through her body as the adrenaline began to settle.  It was supposed to be just a little push, it wasn't meant- This isn't how it was meant to turn out!  Her eyes glanced around the cafeteria. Once again she's the center of attention, with hundreds of eyes on eye. Once Flurry saw Misty groaning in pain with a broken table, she knew she had messed up.   “What were you thinking?! I told you, you don't know how to control your magic yet! You can't do something like that, especially not in school!” Shining paced around her messy room, as Flurry sat on the edge of her bed, looking down at the ground. Why'd this have to happen to her out of all ponies? “You clearly haven't been doing your magic lessons with Sunburst, have you?! Otherwise, this wouldn't have happened! You know how much effort it took to settle that privately with the girl's parents!?”  “I-I told you… I'm sorry… I didn't mean to do it, I swear…” How's it even fair that she's the one being scolded when the other girl was the one who'd been pushing her to her limit? Maybe it was on purpose even! Maybe that girl WANTED Flurry to snap the way she did. “It was just that- she was pissing me off! She insulted you and mom! And me! She said I wasn't good enough, that I'd never be good enough!” Her tone turned much more bleak, quieter, a stark contrast to her usual ‘Whatever’ tone of voice, breaking down the facade of the Princess who didn't really care about others’ opinions.  Shining stayed quiet for a second as he turned to face his daughter, shaking his head in disapproval. First, she starts acting nothing like a Royal princess should. Then after entering school, all she does is cause trouble, and it's still only her second day. Flurry couldn't help but feel like all of this was her fault. She didn't need others' approval, she didn't want it, she only valued her own. Why do these simple words cut so deep into her skin, though? Usually, she would've been able to brush off their mean comments, but why do they feel so personal still? Maybe because there was one thing on her mind. One important thing she needed to clarify, one thing she needed to know the truth about. The others had spoken about this, she thought they were just rumors, but what if they're true? “Um… Can I ask you something?” Flurry lifted her head.  “What is it?” Shining stepped closer.  “Did I actually pass the entrance exam?” She remembered the grueling training, the hundreds of hours of studying, the restless nights of anxiety and worry, and especially the satisfaction when it paid off. Or did it?  “Um…” Shining was reluctant in his answer, and Flurry couldn't believe it. This wasn't true, it couldn't be, there was no possible way, right? Yet, the way he was avoiding eye contact like that, how he was reluctant to speak, it all could only mean one thing. Flurry Heart feared it, she didn't want to believe it.  “Tell me! Did I actually pass the entrance exam or not?!” In an impulsive and quick motion, she jumped off the bed with shaky breath and eyes focused on her father. It's not true, it can't be.  "Pass? Of course you did, but it was only a formality. Your mother and I were sure to arrange a spot for you. Why do you ask?” She couldn't believe it. With just those few words her heart had been shattered into hundreds of pieces. One thing would be to have failed because of her own skill, a whole other thing would be to win because she was predestined for it.  How could he say something like that so nonchalantly? It was like her effort was meaningless, like she didn't even have to try to get in. Was she really worthless? Would she really never be able to be as good as she wants to be at art? But she was good before, what changed?  Well, nothing. The difference is that before she was proud of her own work. But now, she can't even look at it the same way. Tears formed in her eyes, her breathing getting sharper… She needed to think. Alone.  “Get out… Please just get out…” She ordered her father to leave through gentle sobs, and he just lowered his head and silently obeyed, closing the door gently as he left.  Standing outside of his daughter’s room, a million things were going through his mind. He hated himself for not being truthful to her, and he knew he had failed as a Father. More than anything in the world, his child was his pride and joy, even when she refused to live the lifestyle he wanted her to live, even when he reluctantly agreed to enroll her into the school. Why isn't Cadance here!? She'd totally know what to do! How do you even rectify a situation like this?  As he approached the door that led into Flurry’s room, he could hear her faint sobbing from behind. He wanted nothing more than for her to be safe and loved, and yet here she was. Crying because of him. It made him want to slam his head against a wall over and over for being so goddamn stupid. Maybe he'll try speaking from the heart, maybe it wouldn't help her situation, but it would help him cope with his own failure.  He leaned against the door, yet he didn't open it, choosing to speak from behind it instead. He wouldn't want to strain their relationship even more especially after being told to leave.  “I'm… sorry Flurry, I know I say some bad stuff and- I do a lot of stupid things all the time…” He sighed, leaning his head against the doorway. “But I only did that because I wanted you to be happy. All I ever want is for you to be happy, and… Hearing you say you hate me yesterday ticked something off in my brain. I don't know but it just felt so horrible hearing your own daughter say that. I'm sorry I force my stuff so much on you, you're yourself and that's what I want you to be. I mean, it's already bad enough to have one Shining, imagine two?”  His short snicker seemed to cut the tension slightly. A joke during such a serious moment like this? That's her dad alright… Still, he continued, and she listened through the door, feeling her tears subsidize and dry slowly but surely. “You mean the world to me, Flurry. From the moment you were born, through everything we've been through. I'm sorry I wasn't a better dad. I'm sorry I'm only seeing this now. I'm sorry I didn't encourage you to follow your dreams and be yourself, I'm sorry I was stupid, but I realized I was just afraid of you growing up. I get why you'd be mad for what I did, but I want you to know I did it thinking about you.”  The silence was awkward, Flurry didn't know what to say, her mind was rampant with thoughts and emotions, yet she couldn't put any of it into words. He really did mean everything he said, that much was clear, but he still shouldn't have done what he did. She felt worthless. “Well… You didn't help with anything… I'm still just as useless as I was… My art sucks, and everyone makes fun of me. I'm just worthless, and I'll never be good at anything!” Her back slid down against the door, as her head leaned back against it, eyes closed with frustration. Or was it anguish instead?  Shining couldn't bear hearing his daughter like this. She wasn't worthless, and he didn't want her to feel like she was. Yet, he was the one that caused this. It was his fault that she felt this way. His whole life, he wanted nothing but the best for her, yet hearing how she truly felt ticked yet another box inside of him. One that didn't feel disappointed with her, or angry at her, but with himself instead.  “Flurry, you're not worthless, please… don't ever say that. I'm proud of you. Prouder than anything else in my life. You're such a wonderful mare, I just… Failed to see that beauty because I thought you were just being a rebel teen, or whatever stupid idea I convinced myself of. I love you Flurry, and I promise I'll always be here for you.” Shining’s words triggered something inside her. Something she couldn't have expected. ‘I’m proud of you’ Those words echoed in her mind, and she finally realized why those ponies’ words mattered so much to her. Despite telling herself she didn't need validation, she still needed it. Just not from them or herself. It's the first time he's said something like this in a good while… “You… You really mean that? You're proud of me?” She asked in confirmation, eyes wide in surprise.  “More anything in the world.” With his confirmation, she lifted her rear from the cold crystal floor and took one deep breath, turning the knob and opening her door to greet her father.  He looks a bit aloof, confused and especially lost when she swoops in for a tight hug, wrapping her front hooves and both wings around his body, her head snuggling under his chin. This kind of hug was one he hadn't received from her in years. Many years, in fact. But he didn't waste time returning the warm embrace, hearing Flurry whisper gently.  “Thank you… Dad…” It almost brought a tear to his eye hearing her call him dad once again. "You're not that bad sometimes."