Oprah had given up.
Not on the enemies from Equestria, mind. It'd be a cold icy day in hell before she did that. She had fun with the ones that had come down so far.
No, she had given up on freeing herself from the tube lobby. Whatever O'Malley was doing would counteract any feat of strength she tried. Calling out to him had proven useless, as he had never answered. And the other set of doors, which led to a hallway lined with all sorts of odd rooms, were locked as well, and she didn't dare try those.
In all honesty, she was having fun fighting these weird-looking villains. She socked one back to her homeland and made the other into a feast fit for a family. The fun did come from the brutal blows she landed on them, but it also came from discovering new ways to get rid of them, ways that she thought of solely on the fly. If she had been more inexperienced when it came to physical combat, she would have been proud of herself. But she was seasoned. The surprise wore off after the first ten fights, just as the surprise of "I wielded a gadget without killing anyone" wore off on any agent after the first few shots fired.
Slumped over the control panel for the tubes and sipping the last of her juice box, she sighed. It had been several minutes since she had sent Discord away, and she was starting to think that no other villains would show up. If her suspicions were right, this would be on the right track to becoming the lamest birthday gift she had ever gotten.
That is, until something massive came down the tubes. So massive that it looked like the spherical pod was about to burst when it landed in the tube lobby. Oprah looked on in curiosity, sitting up and waiting to see what would come out.
It was a centaur. And not the kind she had seen before. Instead of its upper half being that of a human, it had a more bull-like head, and arms that she had only seen on really buff adults. Its bottom half looked equine, but had far bigger hooves than those of horses as she knew them. However strange it looked, though, it was undoubtedly a centaur. And true to her initial speculation, it was more gigantic she had thought, to such a point where she was surprised it didn't burst through the top of the tube lobby.
"Greetings, fair visitor." Oprah got down from her seat and waved. "I assume you've come from Equestria?"
A puff of air was expelled from the centaur's nose. "Yes. I am Lord Tirek. And I demand to know the reasoning behind your summoning of me to this place."
It wasn't the name so much as the title that got Oprah's attention. "You're a leader?" She bowed. "Then you must have given your ambassadors a break in order to come and see what Odd Squad is for yourself. My name is Oprah, or Ms. O. But you are free to call me Oprah. No need for formalities."
"Hm." was the only initial response. "So this is 'Odd Squad'?"
"Not the entire organization, no. One of its precincts."
Tirek considered this for a moment, his head moving back and forth. "Where are the ponies?"
"The...?"
"Ponies."
Oprah bit her lip, telling her brain that the ponies Tirek was looking for were vastly different from the ponies she knew. And she didn't want Precinct 13579 to start facing allegations of unicorn abuse. "Um...sorry to tell you this, but we don't have ponies here."
"WHAT?! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!"
If Oprah weren't wearing a bun tight enough for doctors to diagnose her with "loss of blood circulation", her hair might have billowed in the wind Tirek created with his breath. Either way, she was pretty sure she was outclassed in the yelling category. "You're not in Equestria, my Lord."
"Then where am I?"
"Another planet."
"What planet?"
"Earth."
Tirek's eyes slowly closed. "So allow me to get this straight." he said. "I was...taken. No, ripped from my home and placed here on 'Earth', in 'Odd Squad', where there are NO PONIES?!" He bent down, craning his neck so that his nose was nearly touching Oprah's. "Tell me there is at least some magic I can try to steal."
Had Oprah not met Starlight before, she'd have been completely confused by Tirek's request. But she knew about unicorns as a species, and she knew about the magic they possessed. Unfortunately, giving up the unicorns that roamed about in Headquarters would land her in hot water with the Big O, and she couldn't risk that after her many decades of service. Plus, she already had a good idea of how she and Tirek could both get what they wanted.
"Well...I could, perhaps, point you to a source. Rich in vitamins and minerals. Not from ponies, but it is just as strong." A smug expression began settling into her features. "However, it'll cost you."
Tirek kept his head exactly where it was, his yellow eyes glowing fiercely. "Cost me what?"
"You fight me. If I win, you get a free tube ride back home, all expenses paid. If you win, I lead you to a source of magic you can feed upon until the day you become victorious in your goal, whatever that is." Oprah stuck out a hand. "Do we have a deal, my Lord?"
This got a hearty laugh out of Tirek. "You? Take on me? And what chance does a puny little thing like you have against an almighty vessel of power like myself?"
"You'd be surprised. Weaklings don't get to be Odd Squad Directors."
"Then by all means." Tirek shook hands with his opponent, then straightened and crossed his arms. "I will allow you to take the first swing."
As much as Oprah wanted to end the fight quickly, she was itching to actually fight someone for longer than five seconds. She rushed towards Tirek and gave him a mighty sock in the chest, causing him to move back a step and clutch a hand to his chest.
"You...you dare to strike-"
"Hey, you agreed to the deal." Oprah cracked her knuckles. "I'll give you this, though: you've been working out."
Tirek reached his left arm back and swung it towards Oprah in an attempt to grab her. However, the girl was much faster, and dashed backwards just as his hand met the ground. She ran up the arm with ease, leaping up when she got to the crook of his elbow. From there, it was like time stopped, as she reared her own arm back to hit Tirek straight in the face.
The punch connected.
Adrenaline coursed through Oprah's veins once more, causing her to lose track of the passage of time. All she cared about were the punches, the kicks, even the bites and the headbutts. Strategy had gone out the window after the fourth-or-so round of blows had been exchanged. She was just happy that where Starlight and Discord had failed, Tirek had succeeded.
As she leapt off of the very edge of the tubes' control panel to strike Tirek in the face again, an orange aura suddenly surrounded her, freezing her in place. Tirek, with a sphere of magic suspended in between his two horns, glared at her with nothing but pure fury.
"There's a good reason I don't fight by physical means. It's quite clear you outmatch me in that regard." He bared his teeth. "But when I drain every last ounce of magic from you, it will be a far easier fight!"
It was then that Oprah began to realize what this villain's schtick was. He wasn't a physical fighter. Like Starlight and Discord, he was a magic user, and one that thrived off of the magic of others to boot. Now, him wanting to find ponies to steal magic from made sense beyond "mwahaha, here's my ultimate evil plan".
Still, even though she had no experience with a villain who sucked out agents' life forces -- at least not yet; she was sure Villain University had some students with that power right at this moment -- she let Tirek do his thing.
Open mouth, glow orange, try to suck her magic out only to fail.
"WHERE IS YOUR MAGIC?!"
"I hope you're as smart in Equestria as you are here. If so, then I think its inhabitants are pretty well-off." Oprah tutted. "Do I look like a pony to you? Let alone one who would even possess magic?"
Tirek had no answer to that, instead giving an angry growl.
Oprah took the opportunity to gloat. "What an oversight. Though for someone who sees their targets as free fuel sources, I wouldn't expect you to know the difference between a pony and a human being." She pointed towards the tubes. "Now, unless you want to continue fighting physically -- and trust me, I really really want to -- then I'd suggest you take your leave before I shove it into your bloody hands."
"NONSENSE!!" came the infuriated roar. "You will find me some magic to steal, and-"
"Or what?"
Tirek stopped. His expression went from red all the way through to confused.
"You can't actually do anything. Our battle has proven I beat you in physical combat, and I have no magic you can take." Oprah shrugged. "At this point, you're better off going back to Equestria. Unless you want to make a bigger fool of yourself."
She barely had enough time to dodge the blast of magic that was sent her way. It crashed through the back wall, creating hole after hole in a Droste effect as expansive as the seal of Odd Squad itself.
A pit of anxiety began to form in the deepest area of her gut. It wasn't the fact that Tirek was capable of laser blasts that were just as larger-than-life as he was. It wasn't the fact that he could absolutely annihilate her in one go if she made one wrong move. It wasn't even the fact that he could break out of his spherical confinement if he got shot back up the tubes, something that she herself had only just realized.
Sighing, she reached behind her back and pulled out a gadget. White-and-blue, as with most Odd Squad gadgets, which looked like a satellite dish haphazardly slapped onto a gun. She made sure to speak under her breath, taking the art of stealth and running with it as she began to aim.
"How much is this all gonna cost me?"
After the party guests cleaned up the bile from the floor -- O'Malley included, as he had been dragged away from his post by Oscar -- Olive decided to visit Otto in the aptly-named Hospital Room, created when agents realized that the Medical Bay's plastic half-pipe "cot" was not the same as a bed used for recuperation purposes.
The boy was lying in one of the beds, dressed in a hospital gown patterned with the Odd Squad seal on it and watching something on the TV on the other side of the room.
"Hey, partner." Olive greeted, moving the curtain aside. "How are you feeling?"
Otto gave a weak wave of his hand in return. "Better. Dr. O's nurses pumped my stomach. It was a really long process, they said, 'cause of how much food I ate." he explained. "The party's not cancelled, is it?"
"For a little bit of vomit? Of course not." Olive replied. "We've cleaned up in the bullpen. As long as Ms. O remains in the tube lobby, we've got all the time in the world to keep planning. Those alternate dimension villains O'Malley sent must be keeping her pretty busy."
"Don't jinx it." Otto pointed a finger at his partner. "We should get things rolling before she comes barging through."
"We will, yes." Olive nodded. "You should stay in bed until Dr. O discharges you. Has she given you a timeframe?"
Otto sighed in frustration. "A few hours. Someone's supposed to check up on me here and there. Dr. O says it's basic procedure." He scoffed. "Even in a world where we have people with two literal left feet and stomachs where brains should be, she still wants to follow 'basic procedure'..."
"Bending the rules of human anatomy only goes so far, Otto."
"But-"
"Dr. O went through eight years of medical school to be able to pump stomachs and plaster tape over non-closable mouths. Not the Odd Squad Academy. Medical. School."
"Harvard?"
"Too expensive."
"Yale?"
"Too far."
"...Cornell?"
"For God's sake, Otto, we live in Canada, not in the land of hamburgers and hellish healthcare." Olive rolled her eyes. "Anyway, it doesn't matter where. My point is that you should trust her. Her nurses too."
Otto's frown grew tighter. "I guess." he muttered, turning his attention back to the TV. "It's my fault for eating the chicken anyway. I thought we could take a third option."
"You said that it wasn't chicken."
"I..." Otto sighed. "Yeah, you're right. It wasn't. I don't...I don't know what kind of meat that was."
"Well, if it's any consolation, Oren and Olaf agreed to dispose of it in the Volcano Room. They said the lava turned a color neither of them recognized. At one point they saw this group of computer-animated horses...and a baby dragon." Olive shuddered. "That's an image I'm not getting out of my head for the next week."
Otto didn't really respond with anything other than a shoulder roll. Silence fell over the room, at least dialogue-wise. The TV was playing some brightly-colored saccharine cartoon Otto didn't really care to watch, but there wasn't much to look at when you were confined to a cot.
"I'd better get back to the party." Olive headed for the door. "See you in a few hours, okay, partner? Hang in there."
Before Otto could even utter anything close to a plea for Olive to stay, the door closed, and her body moved out of his line of vision. Sighing in frustration, he turned the TV off and decided to sleep. If there was nothing good on TV, and nothing within view that he could read, sleeping seemed like the next best option. He was getting tired, anyway. A little nap certainly couldn't hurt.
Plus, maybe it would help him heal faster. Agent anatomy was funny like that.