//------------------------------// // Love's Usury // Story: A Delicate Balance // by JapaneseTeeth //------------------------------// This is it.  No excuses, no stalling.  Before the sun goes down today, I'm going to tell her. Do thy will then, then subject and degree, And fruit of love, Love, I submit to thee; Spare me till then, I'll bear it, though she be One that loves me. —Love's Usury, John Donne Twilight chewed nervously on her lip as she tried to keep an eye on Applejack.  The farm pony stood on the far end of the Ponyville town square, her head bobbing slowly in time with the sound of Fluttershy's avian chorus.  Twilight could barely hear the music.  Too many other thoughts occupied her mind.  How should she greet Applejack?  Should she try to keep it natural and go with a simple “Hello”?  But then again, she couldn't ignore the fact that last time she had talked to Applejack, she had driven her to explode out of frustration.  Should she lead with an apology?  Certainly Applejack would appreciate the honesty and would welcome an explanation for the bizarre behavior.  Of course she would.  She'd have a chuckle at Twilight's clumsy attempts at romance, give her a hug, invite her back to Sweet Apple Acres to talk about their feelings; about how she really appreciated Twilight's honesty.  Then she'd say that it was real lucky that Twilight brought it up, because she'd been meaning to tell Twilight something for the longest time, but could never quite get up the courage to do it— Twilight violently shook her head and gave herself a bonk on the forehead.  Be realistic, Twilight. She told herself.  Don't get your hopes up too high.  Applejack is a good friend, but that doesn't mean that she'll return your feelings.  She's the element of honesty after all; if she doesn't feel that way, she won't hesitate to say so.  Yes, she'll be kind about it, but— She shuddered.  The only consolation in that eventuality was the sense of closure.  At the very least, she wouldn't have to hide it.  A “no” would be better than no answer at all, wouldn't it.  Then again, she wasn't even sure what question she wanted to ask.  Was there a question at all?  Would she just admit her feelings and leave it at that?  Was that all she wanted?  She felt a lump forming in her throat.  She wanted so much more than that.  Her eyes scanned the square.  The real question was whether she dared go that far.  The weight of the prospect made her tremble.   With a start, she realized that even the ground trembled.  Her thoughts crashed back to reality as she noticed that Fluttershy's concert had reached it's conclusion, and the crowd had begun to applaud.  She began to stomp her hooves along with the rest of them, doing her best to look like she had been paying attention.  The crowd began to disperse.  She swallowed.  Just as she had guessed, Applejack was making her way through the throng towards Fluttershy, intent on congratulating her for a job well done.  Twilight took a deep breath and began her approach. By the time she reached Fluttershy, Applejack was already there. “I especially liked that third song,” the orange pony was saying.  “It had a really nice rhythm to it.” “Thank you.” Fluttershy bowed her head slightly as she accepted the compliment.  “I thought you would like that one.  I'm glad you were able to make it.  After— well, you know.” “Hey, I said I'd be here, so no way was I gonna miss it.” “Hello!”  Twilight tried to sound chipper.  “The concert was lovely, Fluttershy.” “I'm glad you enjoyed it,” the pegasus answered.  Her eyes darted back and forth between Twilight and Applejack.  “I should probably get going.  I have to uh, take the birds home. See you later.”  She scurried out of the square, her birds fluttering along behind her. Twilight and Applejack stood for a long, silent moment, each of them trying to will the other to say something.  Twilight cracked first. “So... fancy seeing you here.”  Twilight chuckled awkwardly. “Yeah.”  Applejack dug at a rock with her hoof.  “Well, I told Fluttershy that I'd be here.  You know, after our little, uh... thing.  I'm real sorry about that.  I was just gettin' a bit ornery 'cause I had so much stuff to do. I didn't mean to be so harsh with you, and I've been meanin' to apologize—” “Apology accepted!” Twilight clamped her mouth shut as she realized that she had jumped the gun. “Er, I mean, I should be the one apologizing. I should have noticed that I was bothering you and not tried to push it. I just wasn't thinking. I'm so sorry for annoying you so much.” “Oh, don't worry about it. We all got our little moments after all. Still, you seemed like you took it really hard. Are you sure that you're okay?” “Um, actually, I've been meaning to talk to you about that.” Twilight took a deep breath. One more sentence and she'd hit the point of no return. “See, the reason I was acting so weird is that—” “Applejack! Hey, Applejack!” Twilight's eye twitched as she turned to see Apple Bloom galloping across the town square. She skidded to a halt perfectly in front of Applejack. The filly took a half a moment to catch her breath before continuing. “Big Macintosh said that Granny Smith mislabeled a bunch of the apple barrels, and he needs your help to sort through 'em all. Also, I was trying to teach Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo how to make caramel apples, but somethin' went wrong and the pan is stuck to the stove somehow. Oh, and the front door is squeaking somethin' fierce, so you might want to oil it a bit.” She paused to inhale, doubtlessly in preparation of listing more chores that needed to be done. Applejack preempted it by shoving a hoof in her sister's mouth. “Okay, I get the picture,” she said. “I got a lot of work to do back at the farm. And you do too, I reckon. Y'all get yourself back to the house and start cleanin', okay?” Apple Bloom nodded sullenly and trotted away. "Sorry, Twilight, looks like I need to get going. Is it okay if we talk about this later? I should probably get back to Sweet Apple Acres before Big Macintosh drives himself crazy.” “Well, I really” —Twilight's brain snapped back to the last time she had talked to Applejack— “That's fine. I'll drop by later this evening, okay?” “Sounds like a plan, then. I'll see you later, Twilight.” “Bye.” Twilight felt a mixture of relief and frustration wash over her as she watched Applejack disappear into the distance. “So close...” She sighed and began the trek back to the library. Or she would have, if she hadn't been interrupted by a familiar pink form erupting out of a nearby bush. “Hey!” “Waaahhh!” Twilight stumbled backward just in time to avoid getting headbutted in the face by Pinkie Pie. “So how'd it go!? Did you tell her!? Huh? Huh!? HUH!?” Pinkie punctuated each “huh” by leaning in a bit closer. “No.” Twilight snorted and backed away. “I was going to, but Apple Bloom showed up at the worst possible moment to tell Applejack that some stuff came up on the farm, so now I have to wait until tonight.” “Oh, that's too bad. You aren't going to freak out again, are you?” Pinkie began to scoot closer again. “Because Sugarcube Corner is totally running low on granola bars. Maybe you could binge on oatmeal cookies instead. I'm pretty sure we have some of them lying around.” “No, no, It's fine,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “I've been bottling all this up for weeks now; a few more hours won't make much difference. I just wish I could have gotten it over with. I don't even know what I'm supposed to do with myself.” “Oh, oh! I know what you could do!” Pinkie raised a hoof as if she were a student waiting for Twilight to call on her. Twilight rolled her eyes, not quite sure she wanted to hear the suggestion. The last thing she needed was more advice. Too much advice had gotten her into this mess. Then again, if anypony knew how to kill time... “Well, what is it?” “Chocolate!” Pinkie thrust a triumphant hoof into the air as if she was declaring that she had discovered the cure for Pony Pox. “Pinkie, I'm not going to spend my whole day eating chocolate.” “No no no, you don't eat the chocolate, Applejack does!” Twilight cocked her head to the side. “Um, my whole problem is that Applejack is busy. The last thing I want to do bother her even more.” “That's not what I mean.” It was Pinkie's turn to shake her head. “Come on, Twilight, you know all that boring history stuff about Hearts and Hooves day, but you don't know about this? That's what you do on Hearts and Hooves day! You buy your Special Somepony a box of chocolates!” “But she isn't yet.” Twilight lowered her voice. “As much as I'd like that, wouldn't I be getting ahead of myself a little?” “Well, it's also something you can give to somepony that you want to be your Very Special Somepony. I mean, that's what you want, so you might as well do it the traditional way. And Applejack would totally like getting a box of chocolates. What pony doesn't like chocolate?  Well, I’m sure there’s somepony out there who doesn’t like chocolate, but it’s probably not Applejack.  I mean, I’m sure you could pull out some of those complicated math things with all the letters and squiggly lines and stuff to figure out exactly how likely it is that Applejack doesn’t like chocolate, but I bet it’s a teeny weeny itsy bitsy chance.” Twilight thought for a long moment. Pinkie was right. She couldn't think of anypony she knew who didn't like chocolate. The closest she could come up with was Rarity, but her aversion to chocolate was less due to her enjoyment and more due to the havoc it wreaked on her figure. “Buying Applejack a box of chocolates, huh? Is that really what ponies do when they confess to each other?” “Yep.” Pinkie nodded. “Applejack would probably be all about that. She's pretty traditional, you know.” She whipped a foreleg around Twilight's shoulders and pulled her in close. “You didn't hear it from me, but Bon Bon's candy shop has a Hearts and Hooves Day special going. Well, I guess you did hear it from me, but I'll let you take credit for it, okay?” “Chocolate, huh? I guess it can't hurt...” Twilight poked her head through the doorway of Bon Bon's Chocolate Shoppe. As she heard the ding of the bell that hung above the door, she had to fight the urge to retreat and gallop full tilt back to the library. With far more effort than the action should have taken, she forced herself to walk the whole way into the store. Surprisingly, the store seemed to be mostly empty. If buying chocolates was traditional, where was everypony?” “Hey, Twilight, what's going on?” Twilight turned around to see Lyra sitting at one of the tables in front of the window, harp in hoof. “Oh, uh, good afternoon.” Twilight sighed in relief. She had half expected to run into Applejack. The sheer irony would have crushed her. “What are you doing sitting inside on such a fine day?” “Well, it's Hearts and Hooves Day, and I thought I'd come by and try to spend at least a little bit of time with Bon Bon today. It's only right that you outta spend the day with somepony you care about, you know?” She plucked one of the strings on the harp and cringed at the dissonance. She tweaked one of the knobs with her telekinesis and plucked the string again. “That's more like it. Pity she's always so busy today, though.” “You don't look real busy to me.” Twilight nodded her head at the lack of any other ponies in the shop. “Yeah, that's cause most ponies pick up their chocolates ahead of time. The only customers she actually gets today are the ponies who forgot what today was.” She drew her hoof along all the strings of the harp. Harmonious, but just a bit off. “And most of them came in this morning. Bon Bon's busy because she hasn't had any time to clean up after yesterday's rush and has to do it now. I'd help but” —Lyra chuckled as she rubbed the back of her head— “last time I tried to help with stuff in the back room I ended up making it take even longer.” She adjusted another tuning knob on the lyre. “Why'd you come over here, anyway?” “Oh, right...” Twilight took a moment to consider how she could say as little as possible. “I'm just here to pick up some chocolate.” “Well, it is a chocolate shop,” Lyra said. Twilight couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic. “You buying it for anypony in particular?” The mint unicorn smirked and raised one eyebrow. “Somepony special?” “I, uh—” Twilight suddenly felt her face getting uncomfortably warm. “Yup, I thought so.” Lyra giggled. “Who's the lucky one?” “I'd rather not say.” Twilight mumbled. “I don't know how she's going to react, and I'd rather keep it private until I find out how she feels.” “Oh, so this is your first confession, huh?” Twilight nodded sheepishly. “Well, only one thing to do about that!” Lyra hopped out of her chair. “HEY BON BON!” “What is it now, Lyra?” came an irritated sounding voice from behind the counter. A moment later, Bon Bon stomped out of the back room. Her coat and apron were spattered with chocolate and powdered sugar, and the state of her mane would have caused Rarity to faint. Both of her eyes had pronounced bags beneath them. “I'm almost done cleaning out the—” She stopped dead in her tracks as she saw Twilight. She immediately cleared her throat, adjusted her apron, straightened her mane, and put on a rather refined accent. “Welcome to the Ponyville Chocolate Shoppe! How may I help you?” Twilight opened her mouth to respond, but Lyra answered for her. "Our friend here is getting ready to confess her love to somepony for the first time! I think that she needs one of your specialty boxes for that, doesn't she?” “Of course, of course!” Bon Bon smiled more widely than Twilight had ever seen her smile before. “I'll go put one together! Just a moment.” She immediately began to dart back and forth behind the counter, snatching a careful selection of candies from the display cases. Twilight turned back to Lyra. “What's the specialty box? “Oh, that.” Lyra blushed slightly. “It's the box of chocolates I gave Bon Bon the first time I asked her to be my Very Special Somepony. Whenever somepony comes in to get chocolates for a confession, Bon Bon gives them that set. Says it gives them a bigger chance of getting a yes.” “Does it work?” Lyra beamed. “It certainly worked for me.” "Does it ever work for anypony else?” “I dunno,” Lyra said with a shrug. “I don't really keep tabs on it. Haven't gotten any complaints yet, so we must be doing something right.” “I see.” Twilight bit her lip for a moment, debating whether to ask the question that currently dominated her mind. “Lyra, do you mind if I ask you a... personal question?” “Sure, why not?” Lyra nodded. “I might not answer it, but you can sure ask!” “Before you, uh, asked Bon Bon to be your Very Special Somepony... were you friends before that?” “Ooohhhh...” Lyra smiled knowingly, and Twilight immediately realized that she knew exactly why the question had come up. “If it helps, yeah, we were friends. Inseparable ever since we were little itty-bitty blank flanks.” Twilight sighed; Lyra already seemed have realized what was going on, so there was no reason not to ask another. “So, what made you realize that you wanted to... upgrade your relationship? Was it difficult?” “I don't really know what caused it.” Lyra stroked the lyre once more, and nodded in satisfaction. She began to pluck at the strings, filling the shop with a gentle melody. “One day I just sort of realized that we were spending more time together than with anypony else, and that that was exactly how I wanted things. So I just told her that I thought of her as more than just a friend and things just kinda rolled from there. I mean, it was tough getting the nerve up, but I couldn't not tell her, you know?” “Yeah, I know how that feels.” “Sure it kinda freaked me out to think that she might not feel that way, but sometimes you just have to take the risk.” “How did you do it? Weren't you scared of losing her?” “A little, but when I really thought about it, I realized I didn't have anything to worry about.” She cast her eyes towards Bon Bon for a moment. “We had known each other for so long and been through enough together that I knew even if she didn't want romance, she would still be my friend. Even if she didn't care about me that way she still cared about me. That answer your question?” Twilight nodded. “Yes. Yes, that helps a lot. Thank you.” “Least I could do.” “And here you go!” Bon Bon gingerly placed a box on the counter. Red and heart-shaped, bound with a pink ribbon. “Oh, thank you so much!” Twilight admired it for a moment before carefully placing it in her saddlebag. “How much do I owe you?” “For you, this one is on the house.” “Really?” Twilight stared at Bon Bon for a long moment. “Are you sure?” “Of course.” Bon Bon nodded. “It's a special occasion, after all. You've never confessed your love to somepony before, have you?” Twilight shook her head. “In that case, I hope you'll never have to again,” Bon Bon said. “Take it. You shouldn't have to worry about anything else.” “I understand.” Twilight didn't quite understand it all, but she understood enough. “Thank you.” “Good luck!” Lyra called after her as she vanished out the door. As soon as the door closed, she turned to Bon Bon. “So, who do you think the lucky mare is? I was gonna guess Cheerilee, but it sounds like Twilight's got the hots for one of her friends.” “Cheerilee?” Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “Why in Celestia's name would you say Cheerilee?” “Well, she goes to the library a lot—” “Of course she does, she's a teacher!” “Oh, right. Well, they're... both purple?” Bon Bon just stared at her. “What?” Lyra ceased plucking her lyre for a moment. “I know now that it's somepony else. I bet it's Rainbow Dash! I know that if I was going to ask her out, I'd be real nervous about it. She probably wouldn't make much effort to let you down softly.” “I swear, sometimes I do not understand how your mind works,” Bon Bon said, shaking her head. “Do you really think somepony like Twilight would have feelings for somepony as crazy as Rainbow Dash? I think it's much more likely that she has her sights set on one of her less wild friends. Like Fluttershy, or that pony who's name I can never remember; the one who runs the boutique.” “That's Rarity, Bon Bon. I don't get why you have so much trouble remembering her name.” “Yes, yes, her.” “That would be so boring though...” Lyra smiled mischievously. “Wanna make a bet on it? Loser has to clean the house.” Bon Bon snorted. “First, I will not turn anypony's romantic endeavors into a spectator sport, and second, your version of 'cleaning the house' involves nothing more than sweeping all the dust under the couch.” “Alright, alright, I get the picture. Are you sure you don't want my help cleaning up in the back?” “I'm quite alright, dear. It's almost done.” She leaned in close to Lyra. “I could use some nice music to ease my headache a bit, though.” “I'll play all your favorites then.” “Thanks.” Bon Bon gave Lyra a peck on the cheek and returned to her cleaning. As she trotted back to the library, Twilight's mind was currently divided into three sections, all of which seemed to be doing their level best to impede the others. Section One was ecstatic. Lyra and Bon Bon were living proof that upgrading a relationship from “friend” to “marefriend” was possible. Twilight hadn't read much material that dealt with the subject of romance, but what little of it she had read had given her the idea that when one tried to date a friend, nothing could possibly follow but sheer and unmitigated disaster. But now she possessed evidence to the contrary. Section One of her brain wanted to trade in her horn for wings and take to the sky in celebration. There was no reason to expect anything other than success. Section Two wanted nothing more than to give Section One a slap upside its metaphorical head. Lyra and Bon Bon's situation was anything but typical, and it wasn't all that analogous to her own situation anyway. Lyra and Bon Bon had been the best of friends since long before Twilight had even met Applejack; they had always shared something of a special bond with each other, and only each other. It wasn't like Twilight's position; they hadn't built a special relationship out of an otherwise equal circle of friends. And just because they had successfully made the transition from “friends” to “more than friends” didn't mean that she had any guarantee of success. And for that matter, trading in her horn for wings would be an utterly stupid decision. She had a cutie mark for magic after all, and the horn was rather important for that. Section Three ignored the debate of Sections One and Two to repeatedly insist that somehow everypony in town had manifested the ability to see the box of chocolates in her saddlebag and knew exactly who it was intended for. Naturally, their first response would be to run right to Applejack and inform her of everything. Section Three obviously wasn't much for logic, and as such figured that there was no reason to decide between a horn and wings when you could just have both. Twilight groaned. The effort of keeping her mind from tearing itself to pieces was giving her a headache. She needed some peace and quiet to get everything sorted out. As she turned the corner she immediately realized that she wasn't going to get that peace and quiet as soon as she wanted. Rainbow Dash was fluttering around the library. As the pegasus noticed Twilight's presence, she ceased her circling and glided toward her. “Hey, Twilight! Today's the big day, huh?” “Shhhh!” Twilight dragged Rainbow Dash out of the air with her magic and stuffed a hoof in the pegasi's mouth. “Just because I'm telling her doesn't mean I want everypony in town to find out! Let's get inside.” She darted into the library, towing Rainbow Dash behind her. “Okay, okay, I get it. You want secrecy. ” Rainbow Dash wrenched her tail out of Twilight's grasp. “So, Pinkie tells me that your first attempt got stopped cold by Apple Bloom. What you doing now, formulating plan B? Or plan N, given that it's you.” “No no no. No more plans! That's what messed me up before. I want to talk to Applejack, not give her a speech.” Twilight took a seat at the library table. “Right now I'm just trying to relax a little before I meet her tonight. Maybe take a nap. I couldn't sleep at all last night.” Rainbow Dash nodded and patted Twilight on the head. “Yeah, that's probably a good idea. It's tough to be awesome when you're all tired. Why do you think I nap so much?” “I knew there had to be some reason for that...” Twilight rolled her eyes. “But seriously.” Rainbow Dash threw a foreleg around Twilight. “I know how much jittery nerves can mess you up. You're feeling pretty nervous, huh?” “Obviously.” “Well, I can't really tell you to just stop being nervous, because I've tried that and it doesn't work. But here's the next best thing. Just try to forget about everything that's freaking you out and just do whatever it is you'd normally do. Like go to the market or write a friendship report or study Equestrian history or something.” “I don't know if that'll work. I don't know what to do.” “Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll stick around and make you forget all about Applejack.” “Uh, Rainbow Dash, that's a bit—” “You get your Battlecloud set, and I'll go get us some lunch, and we'll just hang out for a while. Sound good?” Twilight smiled. “Yeah, I'd like that.” “Awesome. I bet you I can be back with the food before you even find the game. Ready, set, GO!” She barreled out the door, leaving Twilight to chuckle to herself. Twilight took a deep breath. She was feeling better already. Twilight's eye twitched. This was a mystery on par with the Pinkie Sense. Achieving victory in Battlecloud was a purely luck-based endeavor. Either you guessed the location of your opponent's pieces, or you didn't. And yet— “Welp, I win again!” Rainbow Dash did a celebratory flip into the air. “That's what, seventeen games in a row?” “How!?” Twilight flailed her forelegs in the air. “There's no strategy! It's just calling out numbers until you hit something! You can't win that many games in a row.” Rainbow Dash let herself drop back onto her chair. “Are you accusing me of cheating? I know I fudged the rules a bit during the Iron Pony competition, but come on. It's not like there's a prize or anything.” “No, no, I'm not saying you're cheating.” Twilight shook her head. “It's just weird is all; statistically speaking I should have won at least a few games by now.” “Well, I guess I'm just too cool for statistics, then.” Rainbow Dash smugly crossed her forelegs. “Seriously, Twilight, you should know by now you can't boil everything down to numbers. That's probably the whole reason why I keep beating you.” Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?” “Well, you're so persnickety about everything that I can usually guess where you put all your pieces. You always try to space them out evenly, so once I hit one it's easier to figure out where the others are.” “Oh.” Twilight looked down at her side of the board. The pieces were indeed lined up rather neatly. “See, this is why the egghead approach doesn't always work.” The pegasus chuckled. “Sometimes you have to focus less on the rules of the game and more on the pony you're dealing with. Now do you want to go for best of thirty-seven?” “No, I think I've had enough Battlecloud for one day. Besides, it's just about time for me to head over to Sweet Apple Acres.” Rainbow Dash checked the clock. “Yeah, I guess it is, isn't it? Time sure flies when you're having fun, doesn't it?” “Yes, it really does.” Twilight took a deep breath. “I'll just get all this cleaned up and then be on my—” She was interrupted by Rainbow Dash dropping her saddlebags onto her back. “Cleanup can wait. You get going before your nerves kick in again.” The pegasus shoved Twilight towards the door. “Hey! Wait just a minute! I'm not ready yet!” Twilight tried to dig her hooves into the floor. “Stop it! I don't want to— Whoa!” She spun out Rainbow Dash's grasp just in time to avoid being smacked in the face by the library's front door. Rarity stuck her head into the room with a melodramatic gasp. “Twilight, are you alright?” “I'm fine.” Twilight shot a brief glare at Rainbow Dash. “Thank goodness.” Rarity sighed in relief. “I thought I'd drop by to make sure you would be on time for your... appointment, and as I came up to the door I heard shouting. I was afraid you were, ah, having another little episode.” “Nah, Twilight's cool,” Rainbow Dash said. “I've been keeping her busy.” “So I see.” Rarity noted the game sitting on the table amidst the remains of a half-eaten dinner. “How are you feeling?” “Kind of numb, actually.” Twilight sat in middle of the floor. “It's like I almost can't believe what I'm doing. There's just so much...stuff that it's going to change. And I don't know if I want it to.” “Sometimes change is inevitable, dear.” Rarity gave Twilight a gentle pat on the shoulder. “Your feelings changed a bit, and you had to do something about it. At least now you have some say in how things will be different.” “It's not just me, though. It's... everything. I mean, how will Applejack feel when she hears that you knew before she did? What if she's angry at you because you kept it a secret? It would be all my fault for dragging you into this! What if—” Rainbow Dash cut her off, stuffing a hoof in the purple unicorn's mouth. “Will you cut it out? If AJ has problems with us, we'll deal with it ourselves, okay? I helped you out because you're my friend, and I wanted to. That's not your fault, so quit worrying about it.” “As strange as it is to say, Rainbow Dash is right, dear,” Rarity said. “I advised you because I wanted to make all of this go as smoothly as possible. You cannot bear any of the blame for the hypothetical side effects of your confession. I wouldn't be able to consider myself your friend if I wasn't willing to involve myself. Now you go, and you tell her how you feel, and forget about us for the time being. I know you can do it, Twilight.” “But—” “Oh no, you don't,” Rainbow Dash interrupted. “No buts. You're as ready as you're ever gonna be. Now go for it!” Once again she shoved Twilight to the door. This time the unicorn put up no resistance and found herself on the doorstep. She steeled herself to step out into the evening, but Rarity's voice stopped her. “Oh, and Twilight...” Twilight looked back over her shoulder. “Yes?” “Just remember that however Applejack reacts, we will still be here for you. Understand?” Twilight smiled, nodded, and galloped out the door. Twilight had barely gotten out of view of the library when she suddenly became aware of another presence on the street. She stopped for a moment, and heard the sound of a delicate throat being cleared. “Fluttershy? Is that you?” “Yes, it's me.” The pegasus fluttered out from the shrubbery that she had been standing behind. “I just...uh, how did things go with Applejack?” “I actually haven't told her yet. Something came up and she had to go.” Twilight chuckled nervously. “I'm actually going to go talk to her right now.” “Oh, I see,” Fluttershy said, so quietly that Twilight barely heard it. “I was just coming over to see how you were doing. I guess I'll let you go about your business.” “Well, I'm glad to know you cared enough to check up on me,” Twilight said. “I'll let you know how it goes.” “Um, Twilight...” The unicorn looked back to see Fluttershy staring at her, chewing on her lip as if she were testing the words with her tongue before letting them out of her mouth. “Good luck.” Twilight smiled. “Thank you.” She took a deep breath and resumed her hasty trot towards the farm. She needed to get there before what was left of her composure crumbled completely. All four of Twilight's knees wobbled as she trotted along the path toward Sweet Apple Acres. Even though there was only one item in her saddlebags, they felt like they weighed a ton. The farmhouse loomed over her, silhouetted by the setting sun. Never in a million years would she have guessed that such a homey and friendly place could look so imposing. Her hoof shook as she raised it up and banged on the door. The top half of the door swung open and Apple Bloom poked her head out. "Good evenin', Twilight! What brings you by here?" "I, uh, I just wanted to talk to your sister." Twilight did her best to sound nonchalant and failed miserably. Fortunately Apple Bloom didn't seem to notice. "Is she here?" "Sure, I'll go get her." The filly spun around and bounded up the stairs, leaving Twilight standing awkwardly at the door, wondering whether it would be acceptable for her to let herself in. A few weeks ago she would have thought nothing of it, but at the moment there was an inexplicable belief in her head that doing so would somehow inexplicably displease Applejack in some vague manner. Sure, if she wanted to be purely rational there was no real reason to not to go inside, but at the same time she had no reason to risk it. She might as well wait outside; it was a beautiful evening anyway. "Twilight, what are you doin’ standing out there?" The unicorn jumped as Applejack poked her head out. "Come on in!" "T-thanks.." She babbled as she began to fumble around with the latch. “You can use your telekinesis, Twi,” Applejack said with a chuckle. “Oh, right.” The latch glowed violet for a moment and popped open. Applejack nodded towards the interior of the house. “Well, you gonna come in?” Twilight swallowed the lump in her throat and followed Applejack inside. “So, what's this thing you wanted to talk to me about?” the earth pony asked. “You've been actin' a bit weird for the past few weeks. I was startin' to get worried about you.” "Yes, that's part of why I wanted to talk to you about it." Twilight's neck seemed to be trying its best to keep her from making eye contact, but she forced herself to look right at Applejack. "Do you mind if we go somewhere a bit more... private?" “Uh, sure, I guess.” A momentary look of what Twilight identified as confusion crossed Applejack's face. “We can go out back. It's still pretty nice out.” “Alright.” Twilight breathed deeply as she followed Applejack into the back yard. “So, you mind tellin' me what's goin' on?” "Well, it's..." Twilight's throat had gone so dry that she could barely talk. "You promise that you'll hear me out, at least?" “Of course.” "Alright then." Twilight swallowed, and forced herself to look in Applejack's eyes as she began to speak. "Well, I'm not really sure how to say this, so I'm just going to start at the beginning. I—I always tried to make sure that I spent some time with everypony every week; you know, helping Pinkie bake things, being Rarity's dress model, I guess you know that already. I just wanted to make sure that I wasn't neglecting any of my friends. It was great. Then, something happened. I don't know what it was or even when it really started.          "I didn't even notice it at first, but I just started to look forward to coming out here more than any of the other things. It's not that visiting everyone else was a chore, or that I didn't enjoy it or anything. I still enjoy going to Sugarcube Corner, or Fluttershy’s cottage, or whatever, but somehow I just kept ending up out here more often and I just couldn't put my hoof on why.” Applejack tilted her head.  Twilight could all but see her starting to put the pieces together.  She forced herself to continue before Applejack could react. “It was starting to drive me crazy. I felt like something was wrong, like I was neglecting my friends. It didn't feel right. It wasn't fair to have a favorite place to go. I didn't know why it was happening, and it scared me. It scared me so much. I had no idea what I was supposed to do. Then I just got lucky. I felt like I had to talk to somepony about it, just to get it off my back, and Rarity just happened to be there. I talked things over with her, and she helped me figure it out. “She helped me realize that as much as I wanted to treat all my friends the same, I couldn't do it any more. Something had changed. It isn't that I like anypony else less than I did. I—I didn't know what it was. I felt like I had barely figured out what it meant to just have friends, and I thought that there was something wrong with me. They're all still my friends, but something was different. Something was different about you.” Applejack's eyes widened. Twilight tried to keep her voice even.  Her eyes clamped shut, not daring to risk seeing what her friend would do when she heard the truth. “Applejack, I—” Twilight took a deep breath and forced the words out. “I think I'm in love with you.” She didn’t dare look Applejack in the eyes long enough to see her reaction. She stared down at her hooves. “I don't understand how or why it happened, and I'm still not sure what it even means, really. I know I should have told you sooner. I was just so afraid of what you might say. I didn't want to risk ruining our friendship. I wanted everything to stay the same, and I tried so hard to bury the whole thing, but I couldn't, and every day I kept hiding it, it just got worse and worse.         “I'm so sorry. I tried so hard to do everything right, but I ended up getting everything completely wrong. I ended up telling them; Pinkie, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy. I should have come straight to you. I was being an idiot, but I didn't know what to do. I needed them. If it weren't for them I don't know if I'd even have gotten the nerve to be here now. I'm sorry that I had to drag them all into this when it should have just been between me and you and I'm sorry that I made them keep it a secret from you. That's why I had to explain everything. I couldn't keep trying to hide it. It wasn't fair to hide it from you when it affects you more than anypony else.” Twilight's voice began to falter. She could feel tears beginning to well up in the corners of her eyes. “I—I care about you so much, and I couldn't... You're one of my best friends, and I wasn't treating you like one. I'm so sorry and I just hope you can forgive me for handling everything so badly...” Twilight paused for a moment and wiped away the tears that had started to slip down her cheeks. She had said everything she could think of. All that remained was damage control. “So, I, uh... brought you these...” She drew the box of chocolates out of her saddlebag. As heavy as it had felt, it looked so small now that it hung in the air. “I mean, it's Hearts and Hooves Day after all, and I thought I couldn't tell you all this without giving you something. I know it's not much but I want you to have it.” Twilight couldn't even bring herself to watch Applejack accept the box.          “I needed you to know how I felt. I hoped so much that by some miracle you'd feel the same way, and that maybe —I can't believe I'm even saying this— that maybe you could... be my Very Special Somepony. I know that it'll probably never happen, but I just want to be honest with you. I want you to be my Very Special Somepony, I really do. It took so long to admit that to myself that I can't pretend that I don't. But—but I understand if you don't. After this, after hitting you with everything all at once... I don't want you to say yes if you don't want to. If you don't want to talk to me anymore or see me again, I'll stay away. I just hope that at the very least, you'll still be my friend in spite of how badly I messed everything up.” Twilight kept her eyes closed.  She wasn’t ready to open them.  Once she did, everything would change.  No matter what look crossed Applejack’s face, things could never be the same between them again.  This was the last moment of their old friendship. The world was silent except for breeze-rustled leaves in the distance. “Twilight...” Twilight summoned up every last shred of courage she hadn't already used up and opened her eyes. Applejack, against all odds, was smiling.  It was a small smile, not one of unabashed glee, but one of reassurance and comfort. Twilight felt her face nearly burst into flames as the farm pony gently placed a hoof on her shoulder. “Twilight...I— That's so much to take in...” Applejack blinked a few times and shook her head, as if trying to clear it of all unnecessary thoughts, as well as shaking the pronounced flush from her cheeks. “I want you to listen to me, okay?” Twilight nodded dumbly. “I'm always gonna be your friend, alright? Nothin' is ever gonna change that. As awkward as this is, I'm never gonna hate you over somethin' like this. Ever. You remember that, okay?” Twilight managed another nod. “Good. I'm just glad that you were willin' to tell me about how you feel, even if it did take you a while. I guess it must have been real hard for you to say it all and it means so much to me that you care enough about me to tell me everything.” Twilight sniffed loudly, and cleared her throat. “Thank you. I was so afraid that I'd ruined everything.” She forced her trembling lips into a small smile. Maybe things wouldn't be as bad as she had thought. “So, I, uh, I hate to press, but I still don't know...well, what we're supposed to do now.” “What do you mean?” Applejack tilted her head. “Well, it's...I mean, you know how you feel”—Twilight dug at the ground with a hoof— “but I don't know how you feel. I mean, I know that it's a bit sudden, but I was just uh, wondering if, well, you know...” “You want to know if I'll be your Very Special Somepony.” “Yes.” Twilight sighed. “That's pretty much it.” She bit her lip, hardly daring to hope for anything. She consoled herself with the thought that whatever the answer, at the very least she would have a sense of closure. Friend or marefriend, at least she'd know that much. “Twilight...” Applejack scratched her head nervously. For a moment, she couldn’t bear to look her friend in the eyes, and turned her gaze earthward. “The truth is, well... I don't know. I've never really liked anypony in that way either. I just don't really know what to do.” Twilight took a small step forward. “Are— are you sure?” “No! That's the whole problem. I ain’t sure of anything now.” Applejack began to massage her temple with her hoof. “I mean, just think for a second about how confused you were when you tried to figure out how you felt about me. I can't figure out all that stuff in just a couple minutes.” She paused, and noted Twilight's slightly crestfallen expression.  When she spoke again, there was a note of concern in her voice. “Twilight, I ain't sayin' 'No', but I ain't sayin' 'Yes' either. I just need some time to mull it over, alright?” She raised a hoof up and put it against Twilight's cheek, meeting her eyes. “I promise I will give you an answer, but right now I just can't.  I really wish that I could, but...”  Her voice trailed off as she tried to think of something else to say.   “I...I understand.” Twilight bobbed her head in weak acknowledgment. “We're gonna be okay, Twilight. I know things will probably be different between us from here on out, but whatever happens it doesn't mean I'm not gonna care about you a whole bunch, okay? We'll get this figured out.” “Thank you,” Twilight squeaked, barely able to get the words out. “You don't know how much it means to me that you're even willing to consider—” “AAAAPPPLJAAACK!” Granny Smith's voice screeched out of an upstairs window. “Time to put Apple Bloom to bed!” “Okay, Granny, I'll be right there!” Applejack shouted back. “Sorry about that, Twilight.  If you want to keep talkin’ things over, I’ll have her all tucked in right quick.” “No, no. It's nothing. I should probably get going anyway. I think we both need a bit of time to think. I'd hate to be any more of a burden on you than I already have been. So...uh, I guess I'll see you tomorrow or some other time, if it wouldn't be too weird.” “That's fine by me,” Applejack answered, doing her best to sound normal. “And before you go...” She made a gesture at Twilight and led her back into the house. “I can't let you go back empty-hooved after you brought me those chocolates. I don't really have any candy stuff here, but you can take some candy apples and a few apple tarts.” She deposited the food in Twilight's saddlebags. “You don't have to be afraid of droppin' by. I really do like it when you're hangin' around and you don't have to be afraid of comin' over just because of this.” “Well, I guess I'll have to visit sometime then,” Twilight said. “Thank you again for being so understanding.” “Think nothin' of it. What kinda friend would I be if I didn't?” She leaned in and gave Twilight a hug.  The unicorn shivered, and Applejack hugged tighter. “And I will give you an answer. The best one I can come up with. I promise.” She released Twilight from the embrace. “You have a good night now, you hear?" "I'll try. Good night, Applejack.” With reluctance, she turned away and trotted out the door, feeling a little lighter with every step.