//------------------------------// // Fleeting Garden // Story: Eternal Love // by Selene Bright //------------------------------// I stand outside the balcony as Celestia soundly sleeps in my bed. Her warmth is always both a comfort and a curse. ‘I couldn’t sleep. I have too much on my mind.’ I thought as I quietly trotted over to the doors leading to the balcony. My hooves click on the solid stone deck as I make my way outside in the cool night air. I stare up at the moon bathing the castle in its serene glow, creating a tranquil oasis in the stillness of the night. I move over to the edge and drape my hooves over the stone railing as I ponder the events of the evening and my life. The cool night breeze whispers through the air as I close my eyes. ‘I long for simpler times, for moments of innocent joy and uncomplicated friendships. I wish I could go back and tell them how I truly felt,' I thought, feeling tears well up in my eyes. I struggle to remember their faces, but all I can conjure are blurry images of where their smiling faces should be, and their beautiful laughter that once filled my world now echoes distantly in my thoughts. ‘I wonder how long it will take for me to forget Applejack's youthful face.’ As I open my eyes and gaze out at the starlit sky, each star feels like a distant, warm reminder of cherished memories. I think about all my friends, and my heart aches as I realize how I never fully opened up to them, never fully trusted them with who I am. They knew me as Twilight Sparkle, the princess, the friend, the problem solver… but not the whole me. I've always been drawn to mares, a truth I've kept hidden from even those closest to me. This part of myself has been buried deep, shrouded in layers of fear and uncertainty. 'What would they think of me?' I often wondered, 'Would they see me differently?' These questions haunted me, creating a barrier I never dared to cross. In all these years, amidst all the adventures and trials we've faced together, this one truth remained my lone secret. And now, as I sit here, engulfed in the silence of the night, I feel the weight of that unspoken truth more than ever. It's a heavy cloak of isolation, one I draped over myself, convincing me that keeping this secret was for the best. ‘But was it?’ In keeping my truth hidden, did I distance myself from the very ponies who might have understood me the most? This question gnaws at me, prompting a surge of frustration that leads me to strike the railing with my hoof. It's a regret that persistently tugs at the very fabric of my heart, leaving me to ponder the paths not taken. ‘Maybe it's time,’ I think to myself, ‘time to start trusting someone with all of me.’ The idea is terrifying. But who? The answer, as clear as the moon in the sky, has always been there, yet acknowledging it feels like stepping into an unknown realm. The stars above, once symbols of distant wishes and dreams, now seem to urge me towards a path of vulnerability. A path I know I must eventually take. The loss of Applejack, so recent and raw, pierces through the quiet. Her laughter, her dependable presence, now only echoes in the hollows of my heart. Her once comforting, strong voice now a haunting absence in the silent night. A poignant memory of Applejack surfaces. "Now listen here, Twi," she said, holding me in a hug. "feelin' down's part of life, but y'ain't alone. We're family, and family sticks together, rain or shine." Her words, her steadying hoof on my shoulder, had been a constant in my life, grounding me during my lowest moments. It was after one of those many losses, as we left the cemetery under a gray, overcast sky, that she asked the question I dreaded. “Have ya talked to Celestia 'bout this, Twi?” Her keen eyes caught the turmoil I was in, reflecting the stormy clouds above. "No, AJ, I don't wanna bother her," I replied, a hint of evasion in my voice. My pace quickened, trying to outwalk the conversation I feared. “Why not, Twi? She’d wanna help, don'tcha think?” Applejack had pressed on, her earnest gaze seeking mine. I sighed, feeling the weight of my own words. "It's different with you, AJ. We're peers, friends. With Celestia, I... I don't want to burden her." Applejack stopped, her expression turning serious. “Twilight, Celestia's more than just yer mentor. She cares 'bout ya, more than ya might think. She’s been askin' 'bout ya, worried-like.” Her words struck a chord, yet I brushed them off. "You help me enough, AJ," I said softly, my voice barely hiding the fears I held within. Applejack gave me a long, somber look. “Twilight, I might not always be here...” Now, alone with my thoughts, I place a hoof over my heart, trying to quell its aching beat, only to feel the void left by her absence. Her unwavering support, once my sanctuary amidst the storm of emotions, is now a gaping hole in my existence. I close my eyes, the image of her still and lifeless body at the funeral a stark contrast to the vibrant, lively Applejack I knew. The sharp sting of her loss cuts through me, a reminder of the lonely path I must now walk. Shaking my head, I attempt to dispel the vivid memory, yet the void where her comforting embrace should be is painfully tangible. My thoughts inevitably shift to Celestia. Her embrace last night, a mix of divine warmth and heartache, lingers with me. Her words, meant to soothe, now echo in my heart, stirring confusing feelings of gratitude, sorrow, and longing. ‘What if I lose you too, Celestia?' The thought sends a shiver down my spine. The fear of losing another guiding light is almost unbearable. Centuries of friendship with Celestia, coupled with the depth of my concealed emotions, converge into a relentless tide of contemplation. One memory stands out, from a time not long after I was crowned a princess. Overwhelmed by the weight of my new role, I sought solace in the tranquil beauty of the setting sun over the castle gardens. That evening, Celestia had found me in my solitude. Her approach was as gentle as the night's embrace, her presence a comforting rock in my unsettled thoughts. "Twilight," she had spoken softly, her voice easing my mood, "the weight of a crown can be heavy, but you are not alone in this journey." As we walked through the gardens, under the gentle glow of the evening's first stars, Celestia shared a part of herself that was often hidden from the rest of Equestria. "During the early days of my reign, I concealed my feelings and vulnerabilities, even from those closest to me," she confided, her tone reflective and tinged with regret. “Luna wasn’t the only one alone and hurting. She was isolated, longing for a world that seemed out of reach, while I was surrounded by smiling faces, yet felt utterly alone. For a thousand years, my greatest regret was not reaching out to her. You, Twilight, were the one who finally brought her back to me." Her smile, warm with gratitude, softened her regal appearance. I paused amidst the fragrant blooms, absorbing her words. "I didn’t realize you felt so alone, Princess," I responded, my voice tinged with doubt. "You've always seemed so wise and unshakable.” Celestia stopped, turning to me with a gentle yet earnest expression. “Twilight, wisdom often comes from making mistakes, from understanding our vulnerabilities. Yes, I am wise, but unshakeable? No, I'm as much a pony as anypony else. I feel sadness, anger, and yes, even regret. Those painful lessons were my teachers in wisdom. In times like these, it's crucial to have someone you trust and care about by your side to help shoulder the burden… a lesson I learned too late during that difficult era," she said, stepping ahead to lean over and smell a bed of roses. Watching her, I contemplated her words. ‘How can I tell her my feelings? I'm an ignorant child to her. How could she ever return them when she sees me more like a daughter than a potential lover? What if once revealed she avoids me?’ I tried to shake the unpleasant thought from my mind as she looked back at me. "Are you coming, Twilight? We don’t want to miss Luna raising the moon, do we? I always love the way she decorates the sky in stars," she called out. A rush of emotions welled inside me, but I managed to keep them hidden behind a veneer of calmness. "Of course, Celestia. There's no place I'd rather be than here, under the stars with you. Even if it's just as friends, it means the world to me," I had replied, my voice barely more than a whisper, heavy with unspoken feelings. Our walk had continued in serene silence, the night air fragrant with blooming flowers. That evening remains etched in my memory. It served as a poignant reminder of the depth of our bond, a depth I had often contemplated, yet kept carefully hidden under layers of respect and… cowardice. As I make my way back into my room I watch as Celestia stirs, her innate connection to the sun drawing her from slumber. ‘Her presence has been a constant in my life, offering silent support and reassurance in moments of doubt.’ "Applejack," I whisper, more to myself than to her, "how do I confess these feelings, what if she rejects them and I lose her forever?" Looking over toward the bed I notice Celestia awakening. Her gaze, filled with gentle concern, meets mine. “Good morning, Twilight. You seem troubled. Did you find rest?” she inquires softly, as she breaks into a yawn, her voice as soothing as ever. A sad smile touches my lips as I shake my head. “I couldn’t, Princess. I had too much to think about," I confess, feeling the weight of unspoken truths pressing down on me. Part of me yearns to reveal all that I feel, yet fear, like an ever-present shadow, holds me back, locking away my deepest emotions. Understanding flickers in Celestia's eyes, softening her expression. She reaches out, her touch gentle as she plants a kiss on my forehead. "You don’t need to be so formal now Twilight we are both princesses," she says with a chuckle. It's a gesture that brings warmth, reminding me of the sun's first rays. “Once I've raised the sun, let's spend some time together. You're not alone in whatever you're facing,” she offers, her voice resonating with a depth of care that feels as nourishing as the sunlight she embodies. Together, we move towards the balcony window, which Celestia opens, welcoming the new day. I stand by her side, not just witnessing the dawn but also Celestia herself, radiant in the morning light. The emerging sunlight filters through the curtains, bathing the room in a soft glow of gold and pink. In this moment, Celestia is more than my mentor; she is the unvoiced love that anchors my heart, my eternal beloved. Watching the dawn unfold, the light illuminates and warms the whirlwind of emotions within me, a reflection of the inner turmoil I face. I realize, standing here, that this moment, is an eternal one, a memory to be treasured. Celestia and I, enduring in this ever-changing world, are like two timeless roses in a fleeting garden of beautiful flowers.