"Mawwiage is what bwings us together today," the pony that totally wasn't a double-agent infiltrating the very fabric of the universe from beyond the fourth wall began slowly.
Blueblood batted his eyelashes at an absolutely smitten King Sombra.
"Mawwiage, that bwessed awwangement, that dweam within a dweam. And wuv, true wuv, will follow you forever," the pony continued, pausing to flip the page of the screenplay they were quoting. "So tweasure your wu--"
"WUBZ!" DJ PON-3 burst through the backdrop blasting dubstep that shook the earth to its very core. The ground trembled beneath the two lovebirds, the definitely not an infiltrating fourth-waller, and the DJ.
Vinyl Scratch turned down the volume. Just for a little bit. But still, the rumbling continued.
A crack formed right between the aisles.
Crunch.
The ground noticeably bulged right where the crack had developed.
Crunch.
It was a sort of thumping sound, like someone was trying to break free.
Crunch.
Tirek roared as he burst through the ground, thrusting a bouquet at the married couple with enough force to wipe Canterlot off the face of the planet multiple times over. Naturally, Blueblood caught it. With his face.
"My love!" King Sombra rushed after the still-soaring Blueblood who was now approaching orbital velocities. "Curse you, Tirek!"
"It is you that should be cursed!" Tirek pointed a beefy finger at Sombra. "Cheater!"
The pony who was definitely not a commenter of What If 2, Eclectic Scootaloo, shied away from the commotion as Vinyl Scratch put the dubstep back on.