One year.
Today marks one year since he's comeback to this technicolor hellscape.
All things considered, it hasn't been that bad; the ponies, despite not really appreciating the stupid joke he pulled however long ago, are still as nice as ever.
It's making him feel... guilty? No, that would've required him to have done something bad.
He feels... like they're trying to make him feel guilty, and he just feels indebted to them.
Sometimes, he wonders why his life is so shit.
He had everything going for him; a wife, a good job, a kid on the way, parents that, despite how annoying he always was as a kid, actually loved him.
And then this shit happened.
Why?
A question he doesn't really ask anymore, because it's not worth wondering, but why?
Why him?
Why here?
What did he do to piss off the universe so much?
He wonders how his wife is doing. She must have been devastated when he disappeared.
He had trouble remembering her name yesterday.
After he realized that, he cried himself tired.
He's never really felt like that.
He liked his life.
He was happy.
But now, he's here, and he's not.
He sometimes considers just jumping off the tower; ending this pain already, but then he remembers he still has a chance to go home, no matter how slim, and he stops himself.
He wondered what she named their daughter. She had to have been born at this point; his wife was 6 months along when he vanished.
He wonders....
A tear rolls down Anon's cheek as he stared across the horizon, at the setting sun. He leaned on the railing of the balcony as he rubbed the tear off of his face, sniffling.
Why is he crying? He's already gotten it out of his system months ago, why does it keep coming out?
His father always used to tell him boys don't cry, crying's for girls, only bitches cry, and all that other shit.
He was hurting.
He wasn't used to this pain, no matter how comfortably these ponies try to make it for him, it just won't go away.
He could do it.
He could tough it out.
He could get through nine more years of this.
He has to..
He...
He collapsed to his knees, shaking with tears.
He has to....
"Anon?" Luna's voice came from behind him.
Anon looked over slowly, before grunting out a quick, "Yeah?"
"Are you alright?" She eyed him warily. He had a feeling she already knew of his mental state; she had a view of people's dreams every night, which is kind of weird and creepy, in Anon's opinion. "You're crying."
Anon snorted before quickly standing up. "Just bummed that your barber sucks." He rubbed his recently cut hair, not really liking how short it was.
"Really?" Luna moved on over, smirking. "She's one of the most high-profile mane stylists in Equestria."
"Really? Well, a lot of folks have gotten ripped off." Anon looked back over across the skyline, watching as the sun began to set. "If you're up, I guess it's nearing bed time, huh?"
Luna chuckled. "Yes, I suppose." Despite her light tone, she eyed Anon cautiously. Anon noticed this, but chose not to acknowledge it. He's never exactly been the type of guy to spill his heart out to others, and he's not about to start now. He also know that Luna probably already knew what was troubling him, due to her being able to see people's dreams and shit. He may not exactly remember what exactly he's been dreaming about lately, but he has a feeling it hasn't exactly been all sunshine and rainbows.
Luna looked over at the sunset herself, watching as the giant star disappeared beyond the horizon.
"You want to know something interesting?" Luna asked, still watching the horizon.
Anon grunted in response, probably accepting this.
Luna sat quiet, staring at the horizon still.
Anon, confused as to why Luna wasn't saying anything, looked over at her expectantly.
She simply nodded over at the horizon, still staring at it.
With a huff, Anon complied, joining her in her strange staring.
For a few minutes, it was nothing more than that, staring.
As they stared, the sun lowered.
Anon was still confused.
"Uh, yeah? Celestia lowered the sun, so?"
Luna chucked slightly, giving him a small smile as she looked at him.
"Ohoho, Anon. Things are not always as they seem." Luna sighed quietly. "The sun represents many things for the species of Equestria. One thing that has been brought up, from what I've paid attention to anyways.." She snuck in some snark, something that made Anon smile slightly, "... Is hope. The sun is a symbol of our people, and that's all well and good, but personally...."
Luna's horn lit up, casting a soft purple glow on both her face, and Anon's face. From the place in the horizon where the sun had vanished, the moon rose, casting its soft white glow on the land. Luna stared at the giant space rock in pride, bringing it slowly higher and higher into the sky.
Eventually, the moon stopped moving, and Luna's horn stopped glowing. The moon sat in the middle of the sky.
"... I find the moon far more beautiful."
Anon had nearly forgotten that she was still in the middle of a sentence, it had been several minutes since she had started it. He thought about making a comment about it, but decided against it. He wanted to keep this moment nice.
They both stared up at the moon, it staring back down at them.
"The moon has an old story with it. The Mare in the Moon." Luna said, beginning another conversation.
Anon looked over at her. He recognized the name, he vaguely recalled Twilight mentioning the name years ago.
"That's... Something about Nightmare Moon, right?"
Luna winced. "Yes, that is a... Name I've been called.." Anon felt a small tinge of guilt, but that quickly evaporated. "You see, I've heard word of another version of that tale. One I find... Charming. And suitable for your current situation."
"As opposed to you being a demon lord that got imprisoned for 1000 years, I'd say anything else would be considered Charming." Anon still thought was a tad ridiculous. A child felt neglected and lashed out in a stupidly obvious plee for help, and instead she got neglected even more, this time for several centuries. Anon's surprised that Luna didn't come back and murder everyone, but he guesses these ponies just think differently than he does.
Luna giggled. "Yes, I suppose." Her smile shrank as she began to tell the story. "The story goes... Hmm... " She seemed to rack her brains for a moment.
"The old ticker feeling a little rusty?" Anon teased.
Luna scoffed. "Oh shush." She shook her head for a moment, before regaining her original air of neutrality. "The story begins with the young Moon mare, yours truly, arriving on the moon one thousand years ago. Like every other one of these stories, it actually begins with... The fight, but... Anyways, the mare awakes on the moon, and she finds herself amongst buildings. Towering, daunting buildings. She is confused, and scared. She begins to walk among the buildings. She eventually comes in contact with the people of the moon. The exact description of their appearance is lost on me at the moment." Luna rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly, prompting Anon to shake his head. "After several days, the mare becomes just another member of their population. A friend of the moonfolk, welcomed with open arms, and treated with sympathy upon hearing her story. She went to spend the rest of her days in peace, living comfortably with the moon folk."
"Wait, you're here right now-"
"The story was written a few hundred years ago, Anon. I quite like the story." Luna stared up at the moon, relishing in the simple tale she has just shared.
Anon thought about the story. He caught the obvious connection between himself and the Moon Mare. He found it too simple. Too back and white. He wondered if she thought he should just accept he's never going home, or that he's going to be here for so long that it doesn't matter. He had a feeling that wasn't her intention, and she had just shared it due to the interesting parallels.
He did however, have a question to ask.
"..Did that actually happen?"
"No."
"... What did happen..?"
"... Nothing."
Luna sounded.... Bitter.
Anon decided against pushing the topic further.
"So uh... What was the point of that..?"
Anon asked, staring back over at the horizon.
"I wanted to tell you a story. And talk to you."
"About what?"
"You."
This caught Anon off guard.
It was such a strange way to put it, but it made perfect sense. But it was also strange. Luna never really made an attempt to be anything other than the cynical sister of the always high and mighty Celestia. She never tried to connect to others, not to Anon's knowledge anyway.
He...
Didn't think he was ready for this.
"I... No." Anon shook his head, looking off to the side, refusing to make eye contact with her.
Luna stared at him, thinking of how to go about this.
This went on for short while, before she sighed.
"Alright, that was... Too forward. What I meant was... If you're ever needing to talk about anything.... I'm here."
Anon perked up, then slowly looked at her.
He mulled this over in his head.
".... Alright. I'll think about it."
He then faced towards the entrance to the balcony.
"Well, I oughta be heading to bed."
"Okay." Luna nodded. "Good night, Anon."
"Night."
Anon headed inside, Luna watching him with a solemn expression.
She sighed.
".. why...?"
She asked herself, before shaking her head.
She soon flew off of the balcony.
That went well.
She thinks.