Right, I'm awake and I'm ready to do shit. Now what time is i-Oh bloody hell, has it been that long? I was supposed to have the next bit out ages ago!
Sorry about that. Anyway, where was I? Oh yes.
So we were both sleeping outside that city, only now realising how long it had been since we jumped dimensions and how much running, snorting and punching unicorns in the face we'd been doing when we were suddenly awoken by one of these horse-y looking things. Well, I say 'we'. I was the one who woke Bill up and probably broke his ears while I was at it. by the way, quick warning before I go on, the bit you're about to read is the closest I can give you to my speech at the time, so that's why it probably makes no sense. Anyway, I heard the clop-clop-clopping of one of them walking up to us, which caused me to slowly wake up. then it spoke, and this was how I reacted.
"Oh god, I just need a few more minutes in be-"
"Um, excuse me?"
"FUCKING HELL! WAYATRINASEEFUGGINFUGGINERE? IGOTHECINEMAANIFUGGINSCAREH!"
I then paused for a moment as I felt an odd sensation in my trousers.
"ANNOWISHATMESELFYABASTEH!"
Multiply that by two once Bill woke up and you've a pretty good idea of how my morning went that day. I'm sorry I sounded so whiny, but if you woke up and there was a fucking talking yellow horse with wings in your face you'd temporarily have the speech capacity of a five year old as well.
Anyway, it sort of backed away from us, like we'd frightened it(I can't imagine how) and it seemed like it almost started crying. Bill ran over and tried to comfort it. Calling it 'fluttershy' which sounds like a name you'd give your daughter if you had a compulsive habit of wanking over your My Little Pony toys or something. No offense, retards. But yeah, While bill was doing that, I'd gone off in search of something to clean out my trousers, theorising that a world of horses probably didn't have Calvin Klein. It was doing this that not only made the problem with my pants worse, but probably gave me a mini heart attack as well. There was just about every single horse that we'd seen before, but they were all fucking running at me! Had i not been so terrified I'd have been at the sidelines screaming "Run, Forrest, run!" However, once I'd fainted again, woken up in a tree library(libratree?) repeated the whiny part from before, fainted again, done all that 17 times and given my trousers a thorough scrubbing, I was told that the horse-y motherfuckers, or ponies as they were called, were running in that general direction because it was the one we were in. Like we were some sort of equine versions of the last two surviving Beatles(or the last two surviving members of The Who, depending on your music preference). Why? Well, I was told by a purple-is looking one with decent hair(for a horse) that, and I quote,"A dark force is descending over Equestria, only you can save us." At which point I took one look at Bill and knew instantly that they were talking out their arses. Oh, I'm sorry, "Flanks".
And boom! We finally end on something resembling a hook and not just me being hungry! My obligation for a small update is filled, I'm leaving again.