Nightmare Moon, despite being just one chain away from freedom, found the small moment of laughter quickly fading. Memories of the events that had left a lasting mark on her and the deep-seated jealousy and resentment towards her sister resurfaced. "Seeing black again," she muttered, acknowledging the darkness within her. If she truly intended to defeat Celestia, she knew she had to maintain her composure and set aside the intense feelings of anger that fueled her.
Nightmare Moon raised her front hoof, the one free from chains, and examined the marks etched into it from the extensive period of being bound. "I'm seeing black again," she uttered, her voice carrying a louder and more resonant tone this time.
The words Nightmare Moon repeated weren't confined to her own ears. Even in the absence of any life forms on the moon or in space, the isolation of a thousand years didn't prevent Nightmare Moon from talking to herself or even addressing Celestia, even if her sister couldn't hear her. Expressing her feelings openly, even when nopony was listening, served as a release for all the stress she carried.
The magic that Nightmare Moon employed to remove the chain had finally liberated her from the prison that seemed destined to be her eternal abode.
Standing unshackled, Nightmare Moon rose, and with a resounding scream, she declared, "SEEING BLACK AGAIN," unleashing a magical beam that obliterated an asteroid passing nearby.
"Our subjects say, 'Oh, what a wonderful princess,'" Nightmare Moon declared as she walked forward, gazing upon the planet she so desperately wanted to return to in order to enact her revenge. The planet loomed larger with every step she took, mirroring the magnitude of her jealousy towards Celestia.
"When you're singled out," Nightmare Moon paused, looking back to contemplate the vast emptiness of space, which had been her companion for almost her entire life. "The black..." She turned her gaze again, fixing her eyes on the entirety of planet Earth and Equestria. "It filters through my veins."
The fragments of the destroyed asteroid fell around Nightmare Moon, causing small tremors. "I was always your shadow," she declared, pressing one of her front hooves against the moon, which trembled on a small scale.
"Easy to ignore, hard to remember," she added as she spread her wings, preparing to take flight.
Nightmare Moon ascended in a straight line before accelerating at full speed toward the castle. "This time, it will no longer be so; darkness will reign forever, and the light will never shine in Equestria again."
Nightmare Moon flew back to Equestria at high speed with a big smile on her face. "I can see how my absence and the loss of a sister have affected you a lot, Celestia," she laughed evilly. "You're just making it easier for me, but don't worry. This is going to be another day that you will remember for the rest of your life."
Celestia has just returned to her castle after going to the post office to send the letter to Twilight's parents.
She considered the option of personally visiting them, taking the opportunity to share the challenges that Celestia has been grappling with. These issues didn't arise recently; they have been festering within the princess for a thousand years. However, Celestia hesitated, deeming it inappropriate to burden her student's parents with her personal struggles. For a long time, she has sought someone to confide in, but the princess has always felt the need to project strength, bravery, and firm leadership.
Celestia, seizing the rare moment of solitude in her room, chose to articulate her emotions: "I truly miss you, sister. I can't bear the sight of this room without your presence; it feels hollow, much like the void within me." Her voice resonated with a sense of despondency as she approached her bed.
The bed, seemingly ordinary with its comfort and softness, harbored a secret that Celestia had concealed. "These sleeping pills... I should dispose of them; they have no effect on me, and they could potentially lead to respiratory problems or infection." Utilizing her magic, Celestia delicately cut a slit in her mattress, creating a concealed space where she stashed the partially consumed bottles of three different sleeping pills, a mere few from yesterday's intake.
Celestia meticulously stitched the mattress back onto her bed, a practiced routine she had adhered to for an extended period. Like any princess in Equestria, she had subjects responsible for maintaining the cleanliness of her room. Concealing her sleeping pills within the mattress was a necessity, and over time, it had become an artful means of keeping her struggles hidden. This discreet act had become her modus operandi by the second week after banishing her sister to the moon.
The delicate needlework blended seamlessly into the fabric, concealing the hidden compartment beneath. The act was not only a practical necessity but also a symbolic gesture of suppressing the turmoil that raged within her.
As Celestia finished stitching her mattress, she turned her gaze toward the bathroom, where her cabinets held memories in the form of an amulet. This amulet served a dual purpose in her life. Not only did it allow her to transform into another pony, enabling her to discreetly traverse different cities in Equestria and gauge public sentiment, but it also held a more personal role.
In the past, Celestia had attended emotional support groups, seeking solace and understanding. Her royal stature made it challenging to participate openly, as her true form could spark inquiries and doubts about her ability to govern Equestria. This belief fueled her desire to keep her identity discreet during these vulnerable moments, seeking support without the encumbrance of her regal persona.
The amulet, once a conduit to exploration, now stood as a silent witness to the emotional struggles Celestia sought to navigate.
Celestia continued looking at her amulet. Memories of several meetings invaded her head, but there was one in particular that dominated her mind. Celestia brought her hoof to her forehead, trying to remember it.
Flashback
In 1985, Golden Feather, known as Celestia, disguised herself as a common pony. She went to an establishment located in Fillydelphia to receive emotional support.
Golden opened the door, and when she entered, nothing could be heard except the sound of the door closing and the steps she took, maintaining a saddened look since her trip from Canterlot to Fillydephia. Golden was eating a donut as she headed to the corresponding room. As she continued walking through the silent hallways, she couldn't hold back the urge to cry, and she didn't want to be seen this way. For Golden, eating something sweet relieved her pain momentarily.
As Golden Feather indulged in her donut, she delicately retrieved a small piece of paper from her mane. Unfolding it with a sense of purpose, her eyes scanned the writing that guided her to the correct room amidst the labyrinthine corridors.
Room "202" awaited her presence in this expansive and intricate establishment. The hallways, devoid of life, seemed to stretch endlessly, accentuating the challenge of navigating the complex. Golden, typically assigned to the night shift, often found herself attending these support sessions.
The establishment's entrance bore characteristic signs proclaiming its purpose: 'Sadness Management, 6:50 PM.' Golden Feather, guided by the printed coordinates on the slip of paper, navigated the quiet passages, each step echoing with a mix of determination and the subdued rustling of her emotions.
Upon entering the room, Golden Feather was greeted by an atmosphere steeped in silence, a pervasive sense of dejection, and a distinct absence of smiles. The sole beacon of vitality and optimism in the room emanated from a cheerful pegasus tasked with orchestrating these sessions. This pony, clad in extravagant attire, endeavored to sustain a positive ambiance amid the prevailing gloom.
Golden, wearied and disheartened, made her way to the table. She poured herself a glass of water, a small effort to soothe her throat before sharing her own struggles. The other ponies in the room, each grappling with their own sorrow, exhibited a variety of coping mechanisms. Some engaged in repetitive readings of tips on the walls, seeking solace in the written words. Others tapped their hooves rhythmically on the chairs, lost in contemplation. A few gazed fixedly at the mural adorning the room, a picturesque landscape depicting a diverse array of land animals against the backdrop of a sunset. Despite the differences in their activities, a common thread united them—the palpable absence of joy in their expressions.
"Would anypony like to share?" inquired the pony in charge, her perpetual smile contrasting with the heavy atmosphere.
A silent gaze swept across the room, meeting a sea of downcast eyes; no hooves were raised. It appeared that the weight of their sorrows still bound many, rendering them speechless.
Golden Feather, distinguishable by her standing position and recent arrival, drew the attention of the organizing pony. With a gesture of her wings, akin to beckoning with fingers, she invited Golden to step forward.
"You, Golden, come on down," she announced, her wings guiding Golden toward the podium.
In Golden's hoof, the crumpled remnants of a disposable paper bore traces of not only donut icing but also tears. Discarding the paper in a nearby trash bin, Golden approached the podium. As she neared, the inscription on the lectern became visible: 'Communicate your needs,' and in larger letters, 'Practice self-compassion.' The poignant reminder seemed to echo the sentiments of the room.
As Golden Feather stepped up to the podium, the organizing pony gracefully descended from the stage, positioning herself on the side of the room. This strategic move allowed her not only to lend her ear to Golden but also to be readily available for any other pony seeking assistance.
Surveying the expectant faces directed toward her, Golden felt the weight of their collective attention. However, it wasn't the scrutiny that concerned her; she had grown accustomed to public speaking. Instead, her fear lay in the vulnerability of potentially breaking down while baring her soul.
Resting both front hooves on the podium, Golden hesitated as she scanned the room.
Observing Golden's apprehension, the organizing pony offered reassurance. "Take your time, Golden," she urged, her voice carrying a soothing tone. "We're all here to support each other; no one is going to judge you. It's okay to cry; that's quite common in these meetings. If you feel the need, just let it out. And if you want, each of us can offer you a hug. A warm embrace can mend even the deepest internal wounds," she encouraged, hoping to provide Golden with the comfort and encouragement she needed.
Golden nodded in acknowledgment of the comforting words from the organizing pony. Poised to share her thoughts, she leaned slightly forward, bringing herself closer to the microphone. "I... lost my sister, the only family I had left." Golden swayed back, her gaze shifting downward. As she steadied herself, she placed the microphone nearer, looking up again. "We were very close, inseparable. There were hardly any days we spent apart. She was the best sister a pony could have." A subtle glaze began to veil Golden's eyes.
"My sister and I were independent, living together happily. Everything was going well until I made new friends; my sister struggled with socializing, and my social circle was expanding daily. While she remained in the shadows, no one was there for her; she had no friends." Golden fought to hold back her tears.
"I didn't realize I was creating a fault line." She sobbed. "Until, of course, it was too late to see." Golden clenched her hooves tightly, her gaze fixated downward. "She stopped talking to me. She believed I was getting all the attention, while she was left unnoticed." Golden took a deep breath, struggling to control her emotions.
"Then one day, she said, 'Enough is enough,' leaving me alone, and she ventured far away to continue her life without me..." As Golden uttered these words, she succumbed to tears, covering her face with both front hooves.
The organizing pony, witnessing Golden's emotional breakdown, decided to offer support in any way possible to make Golden feel comforted. "Thank you for sharing your words, Golden. You don't need to continue; we completely understand the situation you're going through. If you'd like, each of us is here to offer you a hug."
"A hug is exactly what I need right now," Golden replied with a broken voice and stammered speech, struggling to hold back her tears.
"Alright, everypony, form a line and give Golden a hug, offering words of comfort as well." The organizing pony directed, and all the ponies promptly formed a line, providing Golden with warm hugs and words of solace.
Back in the present, Celestia stood in her bathroom, flushing all the sleeping pills down the toilet, reminiscing about her painful past and the loss of Luna. "I'll miss those seminars. I met many ponies at those meetings, and we supported each other. I've witnessed how they age over time, and I've had to get to know new faces. It's... the drawback of being an alicorn."
Once Celestia finished flushing the pills away, she proceeded to the more challenging task – removing the pills she had taken yesterday that were still in her system. Celestia knelt down and, with one hoof, inserted it into her mouth, reaching almost to her throat, inducing vomiting to expel the pills. She repeated the process; it was unpleasant, but there weren't many options; it was either that or jeopardize her health.
Celestia stood up and walked to the washbasin, diligently washing her hooves and mouth to eliminate every trace of dirt.
In her reflection in the mirror, a dejected Celestia was visible, consumed by sadness and guilt. She gazed at her reflection as one part of the bathroom was illuminated, while the other remained in complete darkness.
The princess began to rid her face of blemishes with a little water, keeping her eyes closed. When she finished cleaning herself and opened her eyes again, Nightmare Moon appeared behind her.
Celestia froze for a few seconds. She turned around, her breathing rapid; unsure if what she saw was real or a hallucination.
When Celestia dried her face with a towel, she observed that black lines appeared on the dark side of her bathroom, covering a part of the space, while her reflection, her body, was enveloped in these mysterious black lines.
Upon turning around, everything returned to normal, and there was nothing amiss. "I don't know what's happening; I can't discern if what I see is real or if my mind is playing tricks on me, but to be sure..." she thought to herself while trembling with fear that Nightmare Moon might be toying with her.
Swiftly, she headed towards her room, grasping a scroll and quill to write to Twilight about the situation. However, her intentions were interrupted when she heard a familiar voice.
Nightmare Moon was standing right behind Celestia. "Were you planning to send me a letter, sister? No need, I'm here," confidently expressed Nightmare Moon.
"No... it can't be," Celestia uttered, finding it difficult to believe that Nightmare Moon was right there, behind her.
"Oh, so many ways for me to show you how you've already lost this conflict. Since your dogma has abandoned you, it must be sad to be in your position. Our subjects will realize how completely real I am, not simply a legend as this book says," Nightmare Moon declared with disdain as she lifted the book with her magic, turning it into ashes.
"It hasn't abandoned me; I did it for a reason. I didn't want our subjects to live in fear, that one day you would return..." Celestia replied, turning around, maintaining a crestfallen look, showing no intention to defend herself. Her guilt consumed her inside.
"And you think the best option was to lie to them? Ha! What a princess you turned out to be. But your reign is already over; you're not going to convince me with nice words. I didn't come here for a family reunion." Nightmare Moon prepared to cast a spell on Celestia before banishing her to the sun.
"I'm sorry, Twilight; I'm useless. In these conditions, I can't do anything. This is all my fault; I should have found another way to deal with Luna before she became Nightmare Moon. But using the elements was the only thing I could do. Maybe there wouldn't even be another option. I'm so sorry... these feelings are taking over me," Celestia lamented within herself, blaming herself for the situation. At that moment, she lacked the courage to take any action.
"Surely you're blaming yourself again, and that's why you don't say anything. You'll have a lot to blame for the rest of your life in the sun!" Nightmare Moon launched her attack, hitting Celestia directly.
Celestia emitted a small scream before being sent to the sun, where she would spend the rest of her life.
"Phase one of my plan completed; now I will wait until midnight to announce my new reign," Nightmare Moon declared with a sinister smile. She then transformed into a cloud of darkness and drifted out of the castle room window, disappearing into the sky.
To be continued