//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: Out of the Woods and Into the Bedroom // Story: Anon the Stars // by Ocean Flow //------------------------------// As you gain consciousness, your nose is greeted with a foul odour that reminds you of sulphur, rotten wood, and decaying flesh. Your eyelids slowly open to identify the source of the smell. As you focus, you notice what looks like a crude log sculpture of some kind wolf in front of you. That is until you look into its green glowing eyes. They blink. This is added with the deep and steady timber whistling, you realise this thing is very much alive. And it looks hungry. Despite the obvious danger you're in, your body remains stiff, leaving only your eyes to wonder. I've heard of sleep paralysis before, but this shit takes the cake. Just as the timber wolf readies itself to feast on your skull, its head explodes. Although this explosion didn't spread everywhere, instead the remnants of the logs and sticks flew to your left. You recall hearing something being kicked before the wolf's head exploded. “Ya better get up now. That doggy ain' gonna stay down for long.” The feminine country accent spoke before you checked to see the source of the projectile. Your eyes moved to see what looks like a horse. Although it wasn't any horse you know. The first thing was that she was a pastelle orange with a straw coloured mane tied with a red band, same with the tail. She also adorned a cowboy hat upon her head. Her emerald eyes stare at you with panic and concern. “Oh dear. I'm guessin’ ya can't move?” She turned away from you and called out, “Hey, ‘yall! I've found ‘im! Gonna need some help!” A second after, a blue blur made for a crash landing from the sky, but stopped only a few feet off the ground and hovered. “Hey, AJ!” This horse was a sky blue with a messy rainbow mane and tail. Unlike the orange horse, this one has wings. When she talked, her voice sounded raspy. “Oh, hey! Looks like you've found... him?” “Yeah, and thank goodness you're here, Rainbow! We're gonna need to get him out of here ASAP!” The orange horse points to the pile of wood, a green smog emanating from the logs and sticks. The flying pony looked at the smoky pile then over to you. After giving you a look-over, she said, “Sorry, AJ, but I can't carry him, he's going to be too heavy for me to carry while flying. Hold on, I'll go and get he-” Before the blue horse finished her sentence, a teal light bursted from nothing. Soon after it appeared, it faded, leaving another horse in its place. This one was a light lavender with a deep violet mane and tail that both had a teal stroke through them. They had a horn on their head. Okay, this is getting weird. Am I high right now? “I saw Rainbow Dash fly here and I wanted to check to see if she found him.” You know the mini horse is a unicorn, you're not that dense. “Looks like I was right.” “Cool, cool. Now can you teleport us out of here? We have a Timber Wolf rebuilding itself as we speak!” The blue horse called Rainbow Dash exclaimed. Actually, I'm not sure if these are horses. They're too small and cute to be horses. What are they called… Shetlands? No that's not it… ponies, that's right! “Ah’ agree with Dash, Starlight. Ah’ may have given him a good bucking, but it won't be down for long.” “I wish I could but I can't risk teleporting him as I don't think he's in any condition for that. Who knows what might happen. We'll have to get him out of here on foot. I'll carry him with my magic while you two cover me while we escape the forest.” “Alright then, although we better go now.” Said the orange pony, anxiously. You feel your body being lifted off the ground by an unknown teal light and carried across the forest while two of the ponies gallop and Rainbow Dash flies through the forest. You hear the sounds of snarling and the clanging of wood nearby. The Timber Wolves are hunting you. As Rainbow and AJ fend off the mystery machines, panic overtakes you… And you pass out. Like before, you regain consciousness. Although this time, you were blessed with not being woken up by one of your botched cooking attempts but the smell of… stone? You gently open your eyes to find yourself staring at the ceiling of a room made of what looks like purple crystal. You push yourself up- and you pass out again. Luckily, you were out for a second, this time… probably. Soon after you open your eyelids once more, sitting up slowly to scout your surroundings. As you suspected, the room also appears to be made out of a violet crystalline material. The bed you're sitting on appears to be made of wood painted a baby blue. The other furniture in the room have a similar colouration which include a dresser, a small chair, and a set of drawers. You take a stretch and look down at yourself, realising you're wearing a pair of your pyjamas you remember getting to bed in. As you try to get out of bed, leg first, your feet collide with a sudden jolt of electricity that carries through the rest of your body, causing you to recoil in pain, although it wasn't any more pain than a dozen pin pricks, you big baby. “Fuck! What the hell was that!?” You yell. You then realise your dick has gotten hard. That was when you hear some sparkling noises and the bedroom door opens. Since when was there a door? Wait, of course there was a door! ‘Cos how would I have been here? Well, maybe teleportation but that's just science fiction. Speaking of, where am I? Last thing I remember was this weird dream with a wooden dog and some adorable hors- ponies. This hasn't got anything to do with them right? Like, they took me to bed for some rest? Nah, I'm being held captive by the secret government for whatever reason those fucking nutters have. Oh shit, my boner! As you hide your tiny tent under the duvet, a figure enters the room, their appearance proves your latter theory wrong. It was another pony but was slightly taller than the ones in your dream. No wait, that can't be a dream. Or am I still dreaming? It is clearly another female, the long eyelashes are a giveaway. What caught you off guard was that she had both wings and a horn, the former seem to be larger than the blue winged pony’s. And you bet she might have some crazy thighs that could crush your skull like a sparrow egg. And no, that is not what I want… right now. And that thought doesn't help your ever-growing boner. The pony has a deep lavender coat with a mane done in a fringe that has a pink stripe. Her tail spotted a similar style. The purple pony entered the room in what looks to be a cautious manner, a concerned look on her face. “Hello? How are you feeling?” Her voice was soft but a bit nasally. “Uuh…” is all you can say as you are still processing what's going on. “Did you say something earlier?” You continued to stare until you realised you should say something. “Uh, yeah. Pardon my language, I'm just not used to pain as soon as I try to get out of bed.” The pony hybrid's irises shrink and her mouths agapes. “You actually talk. I knew it!” The cute winged-unicorn’s expression changes to a more giddy look until she composed herself. “Keep it together Twilight. You need to do a safety check, first.” “Safety check?” She froze and her eyes shrunk. “Did I say that part out loud?” Twilight asked, sheepishly. “Uh… yeah, you did.” “Ah, sorry about that. Anywho, I presume you're wondering what's going on?” “I would say confused as if I'm on a lightspeed rollercoaster through many dimensions of hell, but sure, let's go with that.” That made the pony's head tilt in confusion. “Oookay. It's nothing to be afraid of. Just a few questions to see what your intentions are. But before that, I'll need to call one of my friends in. Applejack, you can come in now!” A regular pony trotted into the room. This one you recognise as the orange one that scannered that wooden wolf's head into splinters. As much as you want to say this out loud, you decide to stay silent. “Howdy. Ah’m gonna be here to make sure ya ain't lyin’.” Applejack warned. “Affirmative.” You replied. Why the fuck did I say “affirmative”? “Alrighty then. First question: why are you here?” “I have no fucking idea.” “Okay. An’ ya better clean up your language. Twi, here, is a princess if you haven't guessed.” “Oh um, sorry.” “That's alright. Second question: Any idea how you've gotten here?” “You're guess is as good as mine.” “Okay, final question before I let Twi decide to question ya. Are ya here to cause disharmony?” “An… oddly specific question but I don't think so?” Applejack stares at you intently in silence until her face softens slightly and faces Twilight. “He's a bit out of it and a few apples short, but he's tellin’ the truth.” “Thanks AJ. Ahem. What are y-” “IS HE AWAKE YET?” A familiar voice calls down what you guess is a hall. “Seriously, Rainbow!?” Twilight called back with an irritated edge. Out of nowhere, a blue streak enters the room and crashes into the invisible force field. “Ouch! Twilight, I know Starlight wanted to play it safe and place an invisible shield around the bed, but did she have to make it electrified?” “If ‘ya knew it was there, why did you crash into it?” “... Shuddup.” Rainbow muttered as she landed beside the other two ponies. Twilight makes a second attempt. “As I was saying, what are you?” “I'm a man?” “What is a man?” “Uh… it's short for ‘human’ which is what my species is called.” “Are you carnivorous?” You notice Twilight's horn was lit up in a magenta aura. Near her head, a notebook and quill levitated by the same aura, the quill scribbling on the notebook. It took you a moment starting at the floating items before you realised you still needed to answer the question. “Oh! Well, omnivorous would be more accurate. I do like my meat, but it's not a strict diet.” This got a gulp from the purple and cyan ponies. “Were equines part of your diet?” “Absolutely not.” You sternly answered. This got the ponies to sigh in relief. “What do you eat, then?” “Well, mainly cow, pig, chicken, veggies, fruits, bread, and various sweets. I'm not the pickiest of eaters. Although I have standards like not eating anything sentient or something I would keep as a pet.” Why does she have to ask this when I've just been rethinking my diet? “I see.” Was all the princess said before she asked one final question, “Do you have any magical abi-” “Twilight!” Yet another familiar voice calls from outside the door. “Oh for the love of- We're in here, Starlight!” You hear galloping until a light lavender mare enters the room. Oh that's right! Female horses are mares! I'm guessing ponies are the sa- You pause for a moment. You don't know why, but as the mare enters the room, you pause and stare. For some reason, this pony has your attention more than any of the other mares you've seen so far. Although you recognise her, you can't stop staring. You realised you forgot to breathe and try to remind yourself how to do so. Bad time for Twilight to take the bed sheets off with her magic, revealing your personal circus tent - which isn't very impressive you might add - despite it being at full height. “Look out!” Starlight warns as you feel your member tighten in her magic. FUUUUUUUUU-