Chapter 1 The Start Of Something
Guys a special thanks to Uranium Spoon for taking on the massive challenge of editing this bitch. He is a HUGE help, and he makes this story more pleasurable to read. Now get reading up up and AWAY!
-Van
It was an average Saturday night with my five best friends. Though all of us had met before, this was the first time we had all been in the same room together in over two years. The first hours of our night had gone well due to a full supply of Mountain Dew. Code Red, White Out, Regular, Voltage and Live Wire, all 72 strong; plenty to last us our long night. At ten we decided to order pizza, due to the fact that our reserves of snacks were running low. In a short half hour a car showed up in front of the house and we all rushed to the door to get our delicious pizza. What we saw next we would never have expected.
It was a delivery woman. Cory was the first to speak up and he simply said "Hey baby.”
This wasn't unexpected of him. Cory is moderate sized blond who does gymnastics and cheerleading. Therefore he a beast and all other arguments are invalid. Jacob then gave him a hard pimp slap to the back of the head. Jacob is a moderate sized brunette with a bit of an attitude, also he was the first of us to hold a girlfriend over a year. I still owe him money for that dammit.
Grant then decided to make his move, saying “Never meet these idiots on my life.” Pretty typical of him. He tends to do that a lot when we’re around now that I think about it. He is a moderate sized blonde/brunette who instead of playing sports will write music, friggin music. *Sigh*
One of my oldest friends, Graham, who likes to make homemade music for a band named Pelvic Overdrive, agreed with with Grant, and went to spit Cory and Jacob up. Mainly because if you left them alone long enough they would tear out each others throats once they got mad enough.
That left me and Elliott to pay for the pizza. Elliott was kinda the glue between all of us, keeping everyone in check and making sure I didn't do anything way too stupid. He was tallish, and had shaggy brown hair. Even though the poor woman had just witnessed all that had happened in the past minute and a half, she just gave me the blankest look and said "Can I see you outside?"
I just shrugged my shoulders and just said "Sure," and proceeded to walk out the door, happy to leave all that chaos behind me.
Quickly exiting the house, I was about to ask if she wanted the money, but she was gone, along with the pizza, and just as I turn to re-enter the house I see an alicorn about five feet tall staring up at me. Holy fucking horseapples, I was staring down at Princess Celestia herself. I just stood there, then pinched myself, then slapped myself, and finally poked her on the head.
She was really fluffy and soft, I kept poking her until she said "Do you mind?"
I quickly snapped myself out of it, and apologized immediately. She just sighed and asked “are you Brony number 19,472,848 or Van?” Dumbfounded I quietly shook my head up and down for a good five, maybe six, seconds until she said "Good now go get you friends and tell them to bring a duffel bag and three things, only three things."
"Why three?." I ventured to asked. Her justified answer was the response I used for every why question.
"Cause I said so." she instantly replied.
"Smart lady." I retorted as we walked inside the house.
After walking inside and seeing everyone had left, we walked up the stairs and into the den to see that everyone was sitting on their couches like nothing had even happened aside from that fact Cory had a bloody nose. Still that didn't top the time Cory hit Jacob with a firework. Good times. Upon entering the room Elliott asked "Bro you got the pizza?"
I replied with a "Nope," and continued to say "I got something better! An alicorn!" I was instantly meet with a chorus of uncontrollable laughter.
I turned to Celestia who was now barly controlling her rage and quickly said "Guys turn around serously".
They all started luaghing again. I quickly sighed and yelled "Boobs!!" they all instantly turn around to see no boobs, but a very angry Princess Celestia.
She quickly said through gritted teeth "Grab three things and three things only.NOW".
Cory being a complete block head, was stupid enough to ask the same question I did. She instantly got madder, and then she yelled in the royal Canterlot Voice. "BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T I'LL SEND YOU TO THE MOON!! NOW MOVE!!!!!".
We all gathered our things. Everyone grabbed their iPhones, a can of a different flavor Mountian Dew, and I grabbed the Xbox while everyone else grabbed controllers, and Elliott somehow took the flat screen off the wall. Thankfully Jacob had been smart, He grabbed the generator from the basement and batteries in lieu of Mountain Dew.
During our little pack up Celestia had seemed to calm down a little during, and in a happy voice said" Come my little ponies we are going to Equestria!".
After a wave of pain and some flashing dupstep lights, I awoke inside of a of a bed chamber. Judging by fanfiction i had read, and the episode “Sweet and Elite” I was in a royal bed chamber in Canterlot Castle. "Sweet.” I thought to myself as I tried to hop out of bed.
Unfortunately enough Trollestia turned me into a goddamn pony while I was knocked out (Isn't that illegal?). I just stumbled around like an idiot, and fell face first onto that cold, unforgiving marble floor. Soon after recovering from that morning shock I found a full body mirror In the bathroom. I was a unicorn (Fuck Yeah!). My fur was a ghostly white, and my mane was a variety of blue hues.
As soon as I left, I realized that I forgot something. I forgot to check my cutie mark, my life's calling, my special talent, my identity. I quickly rushed back into the bathroom and saw it was a wave, a light blue wave. “Go figure” I thought, “I love the beach.” I sat back on the bed thinking of all the good times I've had at the beach, then the idea occurred to me that I should go find my friends. I decided to take my duffel bag with me, and looking back to get it I saw it and nothing was in it.
I yelled "NOOOO!! My xbox!" just then Celestia busted down the door (like a baws I should say) and said "I heard screaming is there something wrong?."
Through my forming manly tears I mumbled "You took my xbox, it was my child."
She then sighed and said "Is that it? Just think about it, and pull it out of the bag."
Knowing not to doubt her, I pulled out an xbox, then another, and another. She then said "Now think mountain dew." I thought it, and out pops a mountain dew.
After she said "Remember, only what you brought with you, or what Luna or I enchant into that bag will be there."
Then and there I hugged our new ruler and said "I will shoot an arrow in the next person’s knee who calls you a troll. Have a good day," and dashed off to find my friends.