//------------------------------// // The Family/Spilled Milk // Story: Home Alone in Gotham // by Dinomite123 //------------------------------// Our story begins in a big house on a winter night in Gotham, a huge family was rushing around the house because of a trip to Paris, France. There were two couples who were brothers and sisters in law. There were nine kids who were siblings and cousins. But, there was one who was main one of all...young Flash Sentry. Meanwhile, there was a police officer stands in the foyer, attempting to find an adult to speak with. "Mom! Uncle Cranky won't let me watch a movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I?" Young Flash Sentry said. "Flash, I'm on the phone." Celestia responded. "It's not even Rated R. He's just being a jerk." "Flash, if Uncle Cranky says no, then it must be something really bad." Flash plops himself on the bed and reads a magazine. "Hey, get off! Flash, out of the room." She told him. "Hang up the phone and make me, why don't ya?" Flash said. That offended Cadance. Then came in, Sombra. "Hey honey, did you pick up a voltage adaptor thing? He asked Celestia. "No, I didn't have time to do that." "Then how do I shave in France?" "Grow a goatee." "Dad, nobody'll let me do anything." Flash said. " I've got somethin', why don't you pick up those MicroMachines that are all over there. Aunt Matilda stepped on one and almost broke her neck." "You were in the garage again playing with the glue gun." Celestia frowned. "Didn't we talk about that?" Sombra said. "Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so. I made ornaments out of fish hooks." "You mean my new fishhooks?" "I couldn't make ornaments out of the old ones...with dry worm guts stuck on them." Celestia raised an eyebrow at Sombra. "Come on, Flash. Out." Sombra picked Flash up as Aunt Matila came in. "Do you guys have a voltage adaptor?" She asked. " Here's a voltage adapter!" He handed Flash to her. "Goodness, you're getting heavy! Go pack your suitcase." She told him as she put him down. "Pack my suitcase?" Meanwhile downstairs everyone was still rushing. "Are your folks' home?" The officer asked. " Yeah, but they don't live here." Trixie answered. "Trixie, did you order the pizza?" Sunset asked. "No, Snips did." "Excuse me. Are your parents here?" The officer asked Sunset. "My parents live in Paris, sorry." Then came Limestone Pie. "Hi!" "Hi!" "Are your parents home?" "Yeah." "Do they live here?" "Nope." The officer frowned. "Why should they? All kids, no parents. Probably a fancy orphanage." He grunted. Meanwhile upstairs... "I don't know how to pack a suitcase. I've never done it once in my whole life!" Flash told Snails. "Tough." "That's what Starlight said." "What did I say?" "You told Flash "Tough."" "The dope was whining about a suitcase. What was I supposed to do? Shake his hand and say, "Congratulations, you're an idiot"?" Starlight Glimmer grumbled. "I'm not an idiot!" Flash barked. "Oh, really? You're completely helpless! Everyone has to do everything for you." "She's right, Flash." Snails said. "Excuse me, puke-breath. I'm small. I don't know how to pack." "Hey, I hope you didn't just pack junk, Snails." Sweetie Belle frowned. "Shut up, Sweetie." "You know what I should pack?" Flash asked. "Snips told you, cheek-face. Toilet paper and water." " Listen, Flash, what are you so worried about? You know Mom's gonna pack your stuff, anyway. You're what the French call "les incompetents." She said in French. "Bombs away!" Snails throws his bag down the stairs which lands at the officers feet. "P.S. You have to sleep on the hide-a-bed with Tender. If he has something' to drink, he's gonna wet the bed." Flash is fed up. "This house is so full of people, it makes me sick!" He shouted "When I grow up and get married, I'm livin' alone! Did you hear me? I'm livin' alone! I'm livin' alone! He begins to jump up and down in frustration as the officer looks up at him. Feeling the shaking up the floor. In Snips room... "Who's gonna feed your spider while we're gone? Microchip asked. "He just ate a load of mice guts." Snips answered. "He should be good for a couple weeks. Is it true French girls don't use their basic hygiene." "Some don't." "But they got nice beaches." "Not in the winter." Flash walked in. "Don't you know how to knock, phlegm-wad?" "Can I sleep in your room? I don't want to sleep with Tender. If he has something to drink, he'll wet the bed." "I wouldn't let you sleep in my room if you were growing on my butt!" "Hey!" Microchip see's something and calls the boys to see it. "Check it out. The bat signal." They all go to the window to see a sky light with a bat symbol in the night sky. "Where's Batman?" Microchip wondered. "He's possibly on patrol, duh!" Snips said. "There he is." They see a figure stand on the rooftop. He had a black cape and he wears a leather suit with a bat mask. "The dark knight! Who is always around when Gotham needs his help." Micro drooled. "I heard he one time confronted the Penguin at the penguin exhibit at the zoo." Snips said. "I heard he slapped the Joker." Flash replied. "You mean punched the Joker." Batman turns and spots them, Micro quickly closes the curtains. Later, a Pizza Boy in a car was speeding down the street. He pulls into the family's driveway and hits one of the statues. He picks it up and heads to the door. Inside the house... "How you kids doing'? Good?" The officer asked two little silent kids. "Lot of action around here today, huh? Goin' on vacation? Where you going'? You hear me, or what? Goin' on a trip? Where you going', kid? A knock came at the door and the officer answered it. "Okay, that's $122.50." The pizza guy said. "Not from me, kid. I don't live here." "Hey, the pizza's here!" Cranky doodle called and took the pizza boxes. "That's $122.50." "It's my brother's house. He'll take care of it." Then Sombra came in. " Am I under arrest or something'?" Sombra asked. "There's always a lot of burglaries around the holidays." The officer answered. "We're checkin' the neighborhood to see if the proper precautions are taken, that's all." "We have automatic timers for our lights, locks for our doors. That's about as well as anybody can do these days. Did you get some eggnog?" Everyone went to the kitchen to have a good pizza diner. Everyone grabbed napkins and pour drinks. Flash was looking for the pizza that was ordered for him. "Did anyone order me a plain cheese?" Flash asked. And see's Snips eating cheese pizza. "Yeah, we did. But if you want any...somebody's gonna have to barf it all up 'cause it's gone." He smirked. Flash looked his cousin who was drinking soda and smirks. Flash has had enough. "Flash! Flash, get a plate." Snips said. Snips pretends to puke to spite Flash; Flash charges towards him knocking the milk over and soaking the passports and tickets. Sombra accidentally knocks over the bottle of Pepsi which spills on Cranky's pants; Cranky traps Tender behind his chair. Then Sombra accidently throws out Flash's ticket. Celestia breaks up the fight. "What is the matter with you?!" Celestia scolded. "He started it!" Flash said. "He ate my pizza on purpose. He knows I hate sausage and olives and onions...." "Look what ya did, ya little jerk!" Cranky yelled. The room was silent for seconds, the rest of the family stare irately at Flash. Pizza ruined and milk spilled. "Flash, get upstairs right now." Celestia told him. "Why?" "Flash, you're such a disease." Snails insulted. "Shut up." "Flash, upstairs." "Say goodnight, Flash." "Goodnight, Flash." Celestia takes him out of the kitchen. "Why do I get treated like scum?" Celestia pays the pizza boy. "Having a reunion?" The officer asked. "My husband's brother transferred to Paris last year." Celestia answered. "His kids are still here. He missed the family, so he invited us to Paris...so we can be together." The office smiles at Flash, he noticed something familiar about that smile. "You're takin' a trip to Paris?" Yes, we hope to leave tomorrow morning. If you'll excuse me, this one's a little out of sorts. I'll be right back." "Don't worry about me. I spoke to your husband already. And don't worry about your home. It's in good hands." As Celestia took Flash upstairs... "There are 15 people in this house. You're the only one who has to make trouble." She said. "I'm the only one getting dumped on." Flash complained. "You're the only one acting up. Now get upstairs." "I am upstairs, dummy." Celestia opens the door leading to the attic "The third floor?" "Go." " It's scary up there." "Don't be silly. Tender will be up in a little while." "I don't wanna sleep with Tender." Flash mumbled. "You know all about him. He wets the bed. He'll pee all over me. I know it." "Fine. We'll put him somewhere else." "I'm sorry." "It's too late. Get upstairs." Flash goes on the steps. "Everyone in this family hates me!" He barks. "Then maybe you should ask Santa for a new family." Celestia said. " I don't want a new family. I don't want any family. Families suck!" "Just stay up there. I don't want to see you again for the rest of the night." "I don't wanna see you again for the rest of my whole life. And I don't wanna see anybody else either." That worries Celestia. "I hope you don't mean that. You'd feel pretty sad if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn't have a family." She responded. "No, I wouldn't." "Then say it again. Maybe it'll happen." "I hope I never see any of you jerks again!" Flash goes upstairs to the third floor. He laid on the bed and wonder what his life would be like if they'd just disappeared. "I wish they would all just disappear." He thought. But little did know, that he will experience that life. But it will not be what he expected.