//------------------------------// // Tactical ‘genius’ // Story: Aristocrats, Bureaucrats and Other Criminals // by Phosphor //------------------------------// The air in the room was tense. Twilight did a quick scan of all the ponies, nearly twenty from what she could see, mostly armed with crude autoguns. Both groups held their breath in anticipation, except for Fluttershy who had had her lungs replaced with augments. “Ya got a lot of nerve to try hold me up,” Applejack sneered. The lead bandit didn’t seem intimidated. “You might be a Marine, but right now you’re not wearing a helmet. I reckon a bullet to the head works well enough, even against your thick head. Plus, your friends here aren’t nearly as bullet-proof.” “We aint friends.” “Aren’t your kind supposed to be ‘protectors’?” The stalemate was broken by the roar of jet engines approaching the building, shaking the walls and loosening dirt from the ceiling as it passed. “Those your reinforcements, eh?” the leader of the bandits stood confidently at the other end of the room. “Hoof that vox over, I’ll be talking terms to them.” Twilight looked at Rarity. Rarity gestured her head towards the leader and nodded. Twilight took the vox and carefully levitated it over to the mare. About half-way across the room the vox crackled to life, “Knock, knock!” Pinkie’s tone was as upbeat as when they last talked. “Give me that,” the leader snatched the vox out of the air. “Unless you’re here to negotiate, you can scram.” “Lady Rarity your accent seems different.” There was a pause from the other side of the vox. “That’s fun, somepony different to play the game with! Now, you need to say ‘who’s there’.” “Who do you think you are? I don’t care ‘who’s there’, we’ve got enough guns to turn anypony that comes in here into a fine mist. And then well shoot your friends. Got it?” “You’re not very good at this. Just say ‘who’s there’!” Pinkie was clearly trying to delay while she planned… something. The rest of them were in no position to fight, and they were all incredibly exposed. If anypony started shooting right now it was guaranteed at least one of them would be hit, probably much worse. As the indeterminant bickering continued, Twilight realised that despite hearing the Valkyrie fly away, she could still hear the sound of an engine, and it was getting louder. There was an almighty bang as the door and part of the wall crashed into the room, sending dust and debris into the air. The room erupted with the sound of gunfire as the bandits blindly fired through the dust, hoping to catch whatever was on the other side. Twilight hugged the floor as the bullets passed uncomfortably close to where she had just been standing. After what felt like hours, but was probably only seconds, the gunfire began to calm. As the dust settled, she was surprised to see a Chimera armoured personnel carrier reversing into the centre of the room, providing much needed cover. Each of the six hull-mounted lasguns were pointing at a different target. The turret slowly rotated towards the bandit leader. A small nameplate on the back of the vehicle read ‘Ex Machina’. “Frakking hell. Everypony, SCATTER!” the leader shouted as she dived for an exit. The room descended into chaos once again. Twilight scrambled for cover behind the Chimera. To her relief, most of the rest of the group had already done the same. Rainbow had taken the opportunity to return fire, catching one of the ponies as they retreated. To Twilights horror one of the bandits had managed to sneak around the side. She focused a ball of energy and released it towards the bandit as they fired at her. It was clumsy, but the force of her telekinetic push caused the shot to go wide. The bullets impacted the side of the Chimera, alerting the crew inside of a new target. With deadly precision one of the mounted las gun fired, and the attacker crumpled down the ground, dead. The rest of the fighting was mercifully short as the remining bandits fled through whatever exit they could find. Once the sound of the fleeing bandits faded, the group only had a fleeting moment of quiet before Applejack uttered a stream of expletives. “Why, in the name of the Empress’s holy mane is that,” she pointed a hoof to the Chimaera, “up here?” “I flew it in of course!” Pinkie happily replied as she exited her Chimera. “Well I guess the pilot flew me, but I drove from the landing pad to here!” The explanation did not seem to help Applejack, “In what world was that necessary!? Ya could have just fallen through the whole building.” “Technically that’s a fair point. They don’t normally design buildings so you can drive chimeras in them. You have to be careful to only drive in the right spot, otherwise everything falls down, and that’s no fun,” Pinkie continued, seemingly undeterred by the other’s confusion. “Empress, give me strength.” Rarity breathed. “For those who have not yet been acquainted,” she looked at Applejack flatly. “That is Corporal Pinkameana Diane Pie and her personal Chimera, part of our reserve militia.” “At least she looks like she’s from Volpone,” Applejack muttered to herself. “But if it’s all the same mah work is done, so if ya can just finish whatever this is, Ah can get back to work. Mah sisters’ll be waiting.” “By all means do not feel the need to wait on our behalf.” Rarity tried not to sound too pleased. “Corporal Pie, could you vox whoever brought you in to come pick us up?” “The landing pad might be a teeny bit more fragile than it used to be too.” Pinkie smiled sheepishly. “And a few more holes. You’ll be fine unless you’re scared of heights.” “I, uh, don’t want to be rude, but Angel and Spike are still downstairs. They can’t get up here and I need to check if they’re ok.” Fluttershy spoke up. “And I really don’t like heights,” she quietly added. “Good luck trying to land anywhere else down there. It’s either full of debris or too steep to land on, even for me! Everywhere else is just forest.” Rainbow called over from where she was lounging on the Chimera. “I could use the dozer blade on the Chimera to clear a spot, shouldn’t take more than an hour.” Pinkie said. Rainbow sat up. “Hey, that could work, but how are we supposed to get it down there?” “It can survive a bit of a drop. So if I call the pilot to pick me up from here, they can drop my chimera down on the ground to clear a spot for everypony else.” We just need to get close enough then…” Pinkie mimicked an object dramatically falling to the ground. “If you think that will work, then by all means try. I will be waiting downstairs.” Rarity turned to leave, but was stopped by Applejack. “Hold yer horses, Ah’m not done with ya yet.” Rarity groaned. “What do you want now?” “For ya to prove who you say ya are. Ya could say Ah’m a mite bit suspicious about how some voidborn Ah’ve never heard of got to rule a bunch of planetfolk.” “For the record I am consort to Prince Blueblood,” Rarity said through gritted teeth. “And I have already told you, we lost most of our paperwork when we first arrived here. If you want it you will have to wait.” “Good thing for you, now this little thing is sorted, Ah’ve got a bunch of time on mah hooves.” “Fine, I will bring it down on the first lander.” “Ah’m glad to hear it.” When she was certain Applejack was out of earshot Rarity grabbed Twilight by her collar and dragged her to one side. “When that lander arrives I sincerely hope you have at least something to show her.” “Uhh… let me think.” Twilight shuffled awkwardly. “Maybe have Captain Blueblood explain the situation. He is the legitimate ruler of Volpone, so unless she really intends to take us to the… Arbeters? I don’t know if they have jurisdiction over the Mareines? Maybe the-” Rarity held up her hoof to stop Twilight from rambling further. “That should do. If we leave in enough of a hurry after that, she won’t have time to ask any more questions.” Travelling down the stairs was much easier, and a soft late afternoon breeze had cooled much of the midday heat. The bandits didn’t attempt to make a second appearance, and a scan by the Valkyrie hadn’t revealed anypony else in the area. They were finally alone, without fear of being caught out. It would have been peaceful had there not been a Valkyrie hovering close to the ground between lumps of twisted metal. Pinkie’s Chimera was strapped securely to its underside as the pilot tried to get as close to the ground as possible. “That’s about as good as your going to get.” Rainbow yelled into the vox. There was a loud clunk as the mag-locks released. The Chimera crashed into the ground with a sound far louder than Twilight had expected. With the weight suddenly removed the Valkyrie rose up into the sky, kicking up a large cloud of dust and debris. There was a pause as they waited for the dust to settle. After about thirty seconds the dust parted to reveal… nothing. “Guys, where’s the Chimera?” Rainbow quicky flew over to investigate. “Err, there’s a hole!” Fluttershy pointed a hoof. “Oh Empress, I am never getting off this planet!” Rarity buried her head in her hooves. “I’m ok!” Pinkie’s voice sounded like it had high interference through the vox. Rarity begrudgingly pulled out her vox to respond, “Where are you?” “In a hole.” “Very funny.” Rarity grunted in frustration. “Just tell me what you can see.” “I don’t know, it’s all old, damp and rusty. Might look a bit like the stuff we saw in the tower, though.” Twilight tried to extend her senses into the hole. “Why would there be a basement here? This is supposed to be outside… Wait this whole complex must have been one single building! The hills could even be remnants of hive spires.” “A tremendous theory that you will investigate later, no doubt. However, the light is starting to fade. We must find some way to retrieve the Corporal’s vehicle... Again.” Rarity added with annoyance. “There’s something else.” “What now, esteemed Lady Twilight?” Rarity shot back. “There’s, uh, some background energy in the air. I can sense where it’s coming from.” “The hole?” Twilight nodded.