//------------------------------// // Chapter 2: Face To Face // Story: The Warden: Part 3, Dream of the Warden // by FortressLegacy //------------------------------// When Luna opened her eyes, she found herself in the dream realm. The familiarity of this ethereal plane calmed her heart a bit. The void around her was filled with soft stars, stunning galaxies, and colorful nebulas, giving her the sensation of being a part of the night sky. It was a feeling she relished, and never got tired of. Beneath her metal-clad hooves, a glowing pathway of stars ran from one horizon to the other, an everlasting trail that led off into the beautiful void in either direction. Luna took a moment to breathe, doing her best to keep her fears and doubts at bay. Then, she gently tapped one hoof onto the shimmering pathway beneath her, sending ripples of light out across her realm. Immediately, infinite rows of doors appeared on either side, rushing past swiftly. The moment was coming fast. A surge of apprehension arose within her heart, but she remained determined. She had allowed her fears to delay her long enough. She needed to follow through. Having steadied her nerves, she said his name silently in her mind. "Casemate." As soon as she did so, the doors stopped moving. She looked up, and saw that his door was right in front of her. It was unmistakable. Most ponies’ doors were wooden in construction, simple in design and function. But not his. Luna was looking at a reinforced metal door, lacking any sort of doorknob or handle on its exterior. Instead, it featured a single, raised button right in the middle. Luna momentarily tilted her head, having made these observations. It was unlike anything she had seen from anypony else. She stood there for a minute or two, silently thinking. Beyond this door lay her best possible chance at forgiveness, inner peace, and success over Nightmare Moon. All she had to do was press the button, open it, and go through. … She couldn't do it. She knew that normally, the door would deposit her directly near the pony whose dream she was entering. The thought of simultaneously taking the leap of entering the Warden's dream and immediately facing him was too much. The temptation to just give up arose within her, whispering of relief and comfort that would be hers if she simply turned around and didn't take the risk. But Luna was determined. Tonight, she was stronger than her fears. If she couldn't enter his dream and face him both at once, then she would do one after the other. She could handle that. She was sure of it. She inhaled deeply, closed her eyes, and cast a spell, her horn glowing brightly for a moment as an aura passed from her to the door. She had altered the properties of the door, ensuring that it would deposit her a greater distance from the dreamer than usual. Now that she could overcome the hurdle of entering the Warden's dream without simultaneously being confronted by him, she felt enough confidence to continue. She lifted one of her slender forelegs, pressing the button with her hoof. A mechanism within the door clicked, and Luna took a nervous step back. In a moment, the door swung open, and the princess peered into the dream within. Through the door appeared to be an evergreen forest of some kind. Tall, towering ponderosa pines reached up for the blue sky, and the sun was shining brightly from overhead. Beyond the trees, Luna could make out rugged mountains, recognizing these peaks as the Unicorn Range. On a clear day, these mountains could be seen from Canterlot, despite being roughly a hundred miles distant. Luna then drew her attention to the immediate vicinity, looking for any sign of Casemate, but not seeing him anywhere. Her spell had worked as intended. But she could feel him. Whenever she walked the dream realm, she could sense the emotions fueling individual dreams. Oddly, what she was feeling from this one was not at all what she had expected.  She had anticipated a deep, roiling anger, but instead, she sensed great sadness, and it resonated within her. Her heart ached. The Warden was suffering. Badly. She remained still for a minute or two, standing in the dream realm, peering into the Warden's dream. She took a step forward, making a move towards the doorway. But she froze after a single step. It was now or never. Once she took that final step, she wouldn't be able to bring herself to run back to the safety of her realm. She would have gone too far to turn back without an answer. No amount of fear or shame would keep her from her mission. If she took that step and took that risk, any chance of avoiding the consequences of her reckoning would be gone.  She would either be forgiven, and she would find some semblance of peace, or she would remain unforgiven, and she would forever be doomed to loathe herself and live in shame for the rest of her life. Luna simply stood there, silent and hesitant. For a moment, she bowed her head and closed her eyes. Her fear was immense. But her determination was greater. She opened her eyes, and a steely glint shone in them as she buried her fears, shoving them aside. She was closer than she had ever dared to come before, and she wasn't about to allow her fears to keep her back now. This was a rare moment, her having control over her fear and shame. She didn't know when, or even if, she would be able to accomplish that again. There was no doubt; now was the time. Now or never. She inhaled sharply, closed her eyes, and forced herself to walk through the doorway. She opened her eyes to find that she was in the forest. The pines towered over her, bending and creaking quietly as the cold mountain breeze swept through. Patches of sunlight shone through the canopy, and Luna felt the sensation of the sunlight warming her fur. Oddly, she couldn't shake the feeling that she had been in this forest before.  It was… familiar. In an ominous way. She understood why, for she had been here before. But not as Luna. The memories of her stint as Nightmare Moon echoed faintly in the back of her mind, causing her guilt and shame to stir. Realizing this, she shook her head violently for a second, trying to clear her mind. She was closer than she had ever been before to asking the Warden for forgiveness. Now was not the time to allow her guilt to paralyze her. Speaking of being close, where was he? Of course, now that she had gotten over the hurdle of entering his dream, she was prepared to seek him out. Closing her eyes, she quieted her mind and soul, an act that required no small amount of effort on her part. She went into a meditative state, trying to find out where the Warden was. Having attuned her senses, it took a few seconds for her to determine which direction he was. She opened her eyes, and began to walk towards him, having honed in on the source of the sadness emanating from the dream. Luna strode gracefully among the tall pines, taking in her surroundings as she tried to pin down her memories of this place. Her experience as Nightmare Moon felt like a trance or a lucid dream, in hindsight. But she did recall being here before. She could recall the raw emotions even better, though. The anger and hatred that she once felt for her sister was painfully clear, even after all this time. But the sheer fear and helplessness that came with losing control to Nightmare Moon also stuck out. Luna recalled how afraid she was when she realized that there was nothing that she could do to stop Nightmare once she became dominant. Even though Luna resented Celestia then, she abhorred the thought of bringing harm to her. Unfortunately, Nightmare Moon relished the sensation of dealing harm. Although there was nothing that Luna could do while Nightmare Moon dominated her consciousness, she still felt wholly responsible for what she did. After all, she was the one who let her become so powerful in the first place. She continued to follow the aura of sadness, trekking through the mountainous forest, until an unexpected sound caused her to freeze in place. Laughter. It sounded like it was coming from a child; joyful, excited, and genuine. Luna felt confusion take hold for a moment. A child? Here? The princess resumed her approach, cautiously working her way towards the happy sound. After a few seconds, she found herself at the edge of a clearing. The clearing was quite large, and a cottage occupied the center. Green, lush grass, flowers, and shrubs carpeted the ground in the clearing, making the area appear quite welcoming. Luna remained motionless, that eerie feeling of familiarity having grown upon seeing this place. Then, she remembered. The Warden's home. An excited exclamation from a foal drew her attention to three ponies, all of whom were standing between the cottage and the edge of the clearing. One of them was a young filly, bluish gray in color with a silver mane and tail. She was laughing and playing in the clearing, clearly having fun. Another one was a mare, white in color with a yellow mane and tail. She was facing away from Luna, watching the filly as she played. The third and final pony was sitting next to the mare, also watching the filly. He was blue in color, with a mane and tail nearly identical in color to the filly's. It was him. Luna remained completely still and silent, her mind racing. This was it. All she had to do now was make her presence known, and ask for forgiveness. Two simple actions. ... Yet, she couldn't bring herself to move a muscle. The sight of the loving family had provoked some deep emotions within her.  They all seemed so happy, so serene. Yet the Warden's sadness remained. Luna could feel his broken-heart, and she also felt a deep sense of pained longing coming from him. It didn't take much for her to realize that he was missing his family dearly, and was finding some semblance of comfort in dreaming of them. How could she even consider disrupting him? After how Nightmare Moon took away what he loved most, how could Luna ask anything of him? The princess felt a tear run down her face, leaving a shimmering trail leading down from her saddened eyes as her heart began to feel as if it were about to shatter. Her hopes for a resolution were fading, being replaced with a jarring realization Was Nightmare Moon… Right? Was she only deceiving herself by thinking that he would even consider forgiving her? The sight of the Warden silently watching over his lost family shook Luna. She did this to him. She was not worthy to even speak to him, never mind ask him to forgive her… … She remained there for about a minute, looking at the three ponies as her shame increased. Then, Luna gave an emotional, trembling sigh. She couldn't do it. She closed her eyes, hung her head, and turned around in shame. She would just sneak back out of the dream before he would realize that she was even there, and go home. Snap! Her heart skipped a beat out of surprise. She opened her eyes, and found herself gazing down at a stick on the forest floor which her hoof had snapped in two. Quickly, she turned her gaze to the ponies, hoping that they hadn't noticed. To her dread, they did. The filly and the mare both were looking right back at her, each with a mixture of fear and apprehension. The Warden, however, merely stood up without turning to face her. An oppressive silence fell on the ponies for what felt like a minute.  Only the wind in the pines could be heard. Then, the filly and the mare faded away out of existence, only confirming the fact that they were but figments of the Warden's dream, leaving Luma alone with him. "So," He said, breaking the silence, his deep voice laced with a combination of anger and sadness; "you've finally shown up…" Luna's blood practically froze. She had been caught. There was no way out of this now… She turned to face the Warden, her fear and emotions evident in her face. "I- Uh… Y-yes, I h-have." She said, her voice trembling slightly. She couldn't believe it. Here she was, speaking with the stallion whom she had wronged so terribly over a thousand years ago. Both she and the Warden stood in silence for a few moments once more. "You have a lot of nerve, seeking me out like this." He remarked coldly, still facing away. "Then again, maybe not. If you actually had the courage, you would have met me when I was awake, instead of the safety of your own domain. Luna felt this scathing remark hit home. "Well, I-I thought that meeting you in your dream would be easie-" "Cut it out." The Warden rumbled, turning around to face her, his piercing green eyes shining angrily. "We both know you didn't come here to waste my precious time with excuses." Luna went silent, looking downwards in a non-confrontational manner. This was going about how she had expected. "What is it?" The Warden asked angrily. "Why did you go through the effort of tracking me down?" Luna swallowed her fears, steeling her nerves as best she could before answering. "I-I have come to ask you… S-something." One of the Warden's eyebrows lifted for a moment, showing mild surprise. "Really? You, of all ponies, think you have any right to ask anything of me?" "N-no!" Luna blurted, afraid of coming across as entitled. "I…" She said shakily, trying to get the words out that her emotions and thoughts were trying to suppress. "I am desperate, though…" "Desperate?" The Warden questioned, raising an eyebrow. "Really?" Luna nodded, inhaling slowly as she strove desperately to keep her emotions in check. The Warden, meanwhile, stood there in silence for a few seconds, tilting his head thoughtfully. "Let me guess…" He said, his voice having quieted down a bit, but still showing anger. "You can't live with yourself any more, and you need my forgiveness to be able to move on?" Luna felt the nasty sensation of shock penetrating her soul. "W-wh- How did you-?" She stuttered, dumbfounded. A scowl appeared on the Warden's face. "What? You didn't think that I knew that you would try this eventually?" He asked pointedly. "It has been over two years since I attacked you and your sister. I've had plenty of time to think about how you would approach me and attempt to atone." The princess' expression of shock faded as she realized that he was correct. "Of course…" She said quietly, shaking her head. Both ponies sat in silence, the pines above them swaying in the wind. "So?" The Warden eventually asked. "Are you going to ask, or are you too cowardly to do so?" Luna's thoughts halted instantly. Was he actually giving her a chance to ask? Defying her fears, a faint glimmer of hope arose, allowing her to steady her nerves and work up the courage. This was it. She was going to ask him, here and now, while the opportunity existed. She took a few deep breaths, steadying her frazzled nerves and anxious heart. "Casemate," She began, her voice shaking slightly, "I am so, so, sorry. Every night, I find myself thinking about what happened that night, and I hate myself so much for letting it happen…" She paused, inhaling sharply as she felt a lump arise in her throat. The memories of what Nightmare Moon did were flooding back, and she struggled to keep the resulting sadness from drowning her words. "Now, I-I know that the last thing I deserve from you is your forgiveness. But… But I have reached a point where I need to know…" Luna looked down as another tear fell down her face.  She sniffled once, working up the courage to ask the question that she had been both dreading and wanting to ask for years. "Can you… Please forgive me, Casemate?" Once she finished, an awful silence fell. Even the winds ceased to blow, causing the entire forest to go dead silent. Luna watched the Warden glare at her, his anger clearly palpable as she felt a terrible dread gnaw at her from within. What was he going to say?  She could hardly bear the weight of what had happened, much less the anticipation. Then, he spoke. "What makes you think you have any chance at forgiveness?" He asked coldly. "You know what you did." That was not the answer that she had hoped for. Nightmare Moon's words echoed in her mind, reminding Luna of how she will feed off of her loathing if the Warden doesn't forgive her. If he didn't, Nightmare Moon would be right. This sent Luna's mind into a panic, trying frantically to find an answer. She remained quiet, her anxiety and alarm increasing with every silent second that passed. She couldn't let this happen.  She couldn't let Nightmare Moon be right! Too much was at stake! Suddenly, driven by desperation, she blurted out a reply, unaware that she had done so until it was too late. "Because I am not Nightmare Moon!" The Warden tilted his head, his brow raising slightly in surprise. Luna put a hoof to her mouth, her eyes wide with fear and realization, knowing that she had just spoken out of turn. Her mind raced. Like it or not, she had given her reason. She had to explain. "I-I mean-" She stuttered, "Nightmare Moon was in control! I-I allowed her to gain control, but I didn't think that she would-" Before she could finish, Luna's explanation died in her throat, killed by a sense of condemnation. Did she seriously just try to excuse herself from enabling Nightmare Moon to take his family away by blaming it all on her other, evil personality? "Pathetic." Said a familiar voice in her head. "To think that we thought we couldn't sink any lower…" Luna stood there, looking at the Warden as she struggled internally with the overwhelming emotions toiling inside. Unfortunately, it was a losing battle, and her hopes were growing very thin. She was looking at the very real probability of having to consign herself to remaining unforgiven. Her hope fizzled out, her heart darkened, and her spirit fell lower than it had before... There was no doubt in her mind that she had failed... ... But then, slowly, a peculiar expression spread across the Warden's face. His glare faded in intensity, and an expression of indecisiveness seemed to take hold. Luna felt her fear and depression slow down, as confusion took hold. Was he… Hesitating?  Why? The Warden looked downwards, breaking direct eye contact with Luna for the first time. He took a deep, long sigh, and the expression on his face showed that he was deep in thought. He was hesitating. Against all odds, a miniscule glimmer of hope reignited within Luna. Did her careless outburst actually help? In any case, the anger that he was once showing had visibly diminished. Was he more open to the idea of forgiving her than she had first thought, or at least hadn't made the final decision yet? Both ponies stood in their places for a few minutes, each not saying a single word as their thoughts raged within their minds. Then, looking back up at Luna, he spoke, his tone calmer than it had ever been thus far. "I know." The princess' heart felt like it froze. "W-what?" She asked quietly, her eyes widening as she struggled to believe what she had just heard. "You… You do?" Both she and the Warden looked at each other for a brief, silent moment. "I know who you are, and I know who you once were." He explained. The hopefulness within Luna began to grow in intensity. He had just acknowledged that he understood that she was not Nightmare Moon, but rather, they were totally different! If this was the case, then was forgiveness closer than she had first thought? Was she going to receive what she needed to suppress Nightmare Moon and contain her? "Then… You do forgive me?" Luna's voice shook slightly as the hope within her began to spring up in a greater volume than she could have anticipated. Her deep, turquoise eyes shimmered in anticipation, her breath bated as she silently prayed that this would be the case. The Warden didn't answer right away, though. He glanced away, his brow furrowing as he visibly debated what to do. Luna remained silent, giving him the distance and time needed to reach a decision. She could feel the indecisiveness within him, raging and swirling into the dreamscape surrounding them. Despite her desperation urging her to try and sway his mind, she knew that trying to force a decision out of him would be the worst thing that she could do. The right thing to do was to wait. Her heartbeat steadily grew faster, and her breaths did as well. As the seconds passed, her apprehension and uneasiness grew.  Her ability to keep Nightmare Moon at bay likely depended on this answer. If he didn't forgive her, there was no guarantee that she would be able to withhold her dark self. If Nightmare Moon took control again, Equestria would not be safe. Not only would the Warden's next words likely determine her fate, but it would determine Equestria's as well… What was he going to say? Finally, after at least a full minute of increasingly unbearable silence, he sighed. The Warden turned towards Luna, and looked at her straight in the eye. "Can you access the most important moments in my life?" It took a few seconds for Luna to process his question. "W-what?" She asked confusedly, her hopes dimming. Where in Celestia's name did that question come from? The Warden groaned slightly in annoyance. "Can you find defining moments from my life and replay them here in my dream?" He asked, this time sounding as if he were taking more care to speak more slowly and clearly. Luna nodded confusedly. She did, in fact, possess the ability to replay key moments from ponies' lives within their dreams. However, she didn't quite understand why he was asking this now. She had expected either a yes or a no, not that. "Yes… I can." She answered, her gaze wandering away from him as she went deeper into thought, trying to understand why he asked such a thing. "M-may I ask why?" The Warden shook his head. "No. I want you to replay such moments from my life, and for you to watch, nothing more. Understand?" Luna was perplexed. What was he trying to accomplish by making her watch his most defining moments? This thought sent shivers down her back. Was she going to have to relive that moment again? Yet again, fear began to arise within her. She did not want to relive Nightmare Moon's deeds. The feelings of guilt, shame, and self-loathing would return even stronger than before, not to mention that she would be witnessing the single most traumatic time in her life yet again. An urge to back out of the dream washed over her, and for a few indecisive seconds, she simply froze, unable to think or act clearly. But what if this was a test? What if he was testing her, trying to determine whether or not she had the strength to come face to face with her greatest failure? Would that mean that he might forgive her if she followed through? If so, would failure mean that she would not gain the forgiveness that she so desperately craved? The more she dwelled upon it, the more she became convinced that this was likely the case. She had to try. After nearly a full minute of thought, she finally gave a single nod. "I do." She said solemnly. "Good." The Warden replied. "Start at the beginning." Luna silently acknowledged his wishes, giving another nod. Despite her silence, she felt a terrible tumult within.  Fear gnawed at her, begging her to retreat to the safety of her chambers, and to leave the Warden alone for good. Yet, if this was her only shot at obtaining his forgiveness and beating Nightmare Moon once and for all, she had to take it. Luna's horn began to glow as she closed her eyes, reaching into the dream realm. Within seconds, in her mind's eye, she found the first significant event in the Warden's life. She paused for a moment, then her horn shone brighter. The forest around them faded into darkness in a swirl of cloudy shapes.  In seconds, the two ponies were enveloped in the miasma, and Luna gracefully accepted her choice. For better or for worse, she was going to follow through.