//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: Confronting A Nightmare // Story: The Warden: Part 3, Dream of the Warden // by FortressLegacy //------------------------------// Two Months Later… Luna sighed, gazing down upon Canterlot from her balcony. A blanket of winter snow and ice covered the city, glistening in the warm light of the streetlamps. Not a single cloud could be seen, providing a crystal clear sky with an unobstructed view of the intricate constellations above. A full moon hung high in the sky, bathing Equestria below with its gentle, pale glow. All these came together to form a spectacular scene. The sheer beauty of Luna's sky combined with the elegant sight of the sleeping, glistening mountainside city below created a spectacle the likes of which she knew couldn't be seen anywhere else. She exhaled slowly, watching her breath condense into an icy cloud and float off into the night. It was all so… Serene. If that was the case, then why did she feel so uneasy? Ever since that evening several months ago, when she found out that the Warden had returned Apple Bloom to Ponyville, she had made a resolution: Seek him out, and ask for his forgiveness for what she did as Nightmare Moon. Yet, here she was; several months later, still having not asked. She tried to work up the courage, night after night.  But she never seemed to be able to find enough… Even after seeking out Apple Bloom, and receiving encouragement from the filly, Luna still found herself stuck. Night after night, week after week, month after month, she told herself that she was going to follow through. But even after all that, she couldn't bring herself to do it. Luna felt a gust of icy wind rush past, stirring up her sparkling mane and tail, causing her to shiver a bit. She also felt the familiar, painful sensation of fear pierce her soul, as it did every single night. It was likely that he would refuse to do so. She couldn't blame him, but what would she do if he said so? She would probably come to hate herself even more so than she already did. Yes, Nightmare Moon was responsible for those unspeakable deeds, but was Luna completely without blame? The princess of the night hung her head, and looked down, gazing at her reflection in the polished stone floor of the icy balcony. Her reflection looked back up at her, her beautiful eyes showing a mixture of curiosity and remorse. She continued to gaze at her reflection, seeming to probe through the dark fur and metal adornments to investigate the soul that lay underneath. Nightmare Moon and Luna were not one and the same, despite sharing a body. They never were, and she always knew that in the back of her mind. Luna was good, benevolent, caring, and empathetic. Nightmare Moon was evil, wrathful, sinister, and callous. They shared a body, but they were not the same being. Luna remembered when she was officially diagnosed with Dissociative Personality Disorder, not long after her return from the moon. She recalled when she learned that Nightmare Moon was the result of an unhealthy coping mechanism built to deal with the circumstances of her early life. It was during her fillyhood that the alicorn genocide by the Equestrian Republic, under the leadership of Citadel Fortress, took place, resulting in the deaths of her parents, leaving her and Celestia as the sole surviving true alicorns. No wonder Nightmare Moon was so evil... She was a reflection of the sheer amount of anger and bitterness that Luna just didn't know how to cope with at the time. Luna also remembered how Nightmare Moon began to become the dominant personality, wrestling her consciousness away, bit by bit. Luna fought back hard, keeping Nightmare Moon down enough to deny full control.  But Celestia's past pettiness and ignorance of her younger sister's emotional needs tipped the scales eventually, causing Luna to willingly lower her guard against Nightmare Moon. Of course, she immediately regretted it. With a shudder, she remembered the horror of being forced to watch as Nightmare Moon took control, wreaking havoc, seeking to destroy her sister, and subjugating all ponies under an eternal night. While Luna did resent Celestia at that point in the past, she still loved her sister deeply. Luna never wanted to commit such evil acts, but was forced to witness Nightmare Moon do so anyway. "Awww, thinking of me, are you?" Luna jumped slightly, looking around to find who was speaking.  She was alone. But… That voice. She heard it, clear as day. But her ears didn't hear a thing. Rather, it seemed as if it were speaking directly into her mind. The voice also sounded a lot like her, but at the same time, Luna recognized that it wasn't her own. It was deeper, angrier, and far more sinister. "Oh, look down, Luna." The voice said irritably. "I shouldn't have to hold your hoof." The princess closed her eyes, and shuddered. She knew who it was. She sighed, and slowly turned her head back down to the floor. Sure enough, it was who she suspected. Where Luna's reflection was before, now there was another pony. A mare. Dark, menacing, but also beautiful in a terrifying manner. Her fur was as black as night, her teeth flashing and sharp, her pupils slitted and disturbingly piercing. Nightmare Moon. "What do you want?" Luna asked, trying her hardest to not show the fear that was accumulating in her heart. The reflection gave a toothy grin that practically caused Luna's fur to stand on end. "What? Can I not be concerned for the wellbeing of my other half?" Luna snorted. "We know that you don't make a habit of showing concern or compassion, especially for me." Nightmare Moon's frightening smile faded. "Very well, I suppose I shall cut it to the chase, then." "Please do. The sooner you finish, the sooner I don't have to look at you." Luna saw Nightmare Moon's expression turn sour for a moment, her eyes flashing hatefully before she spoke. "It's about the Warden." The reflection explained. "You need to forget about him." Luna glared at the reflection. "How? We know I can't forget what we did." Nightmare Moon rolled her eyes and sighed in an exasperated manner. "We can, Luna. We can leave all that guilt and shame behind. As I have told you every single time you felt down, if you simply give me back-" "And as I have told you every time you have offered: No." Luna interrupted angrily. "I am not making the mistake of letting you take control again. Your solutions to our problems are sickening!" Nightmare Moon scowled, her sharp teeth shining menacingly against her black fur. "Very well."  She growled. "But you are merely delaying the inevitable." Luna shook her head.  "And what, pray tell, is inevitable?" "Me, of course!" Nightmare Moon sighed, still looking angry. "It reviles me to see just how naïve you can be…" Luna felt a dagger of apprehension dig into her heart. "I'm not letting you get that powerful again." She said, a slight shudder in her voice showing the fear that had arisen. "Oh, please…" The reflection moaned. "We would be so much better off if you would stop pretending that I won't." Luna closed her eyes, and inhaled slowly. Her jaw became set, and she tensed up. "Why are you here?" She asked in a more impatient tone, anger and desperation becoming more apparent in her voice. "Have you come to torment me, or are you continuing to try to dissuade me from going to the Warden?" Nightmare Moon stared up at Luna with a mixture of slight surprise and thoughtfulness. "Well, now that you mention it…" The reflection mused, "I am here to save us some trouble." "To save us trouble?" Luna scoffed, rolling her eyes. "To what end? Why shouldn't I ask for forgiveness?" "Because, as I said before, no matter what you do, I will grow powerful enough to take control and seek out what we deserve. Going to the Warden will only delay it. Why not take the easier path?" "You say that as if I am going to willingly let you have your way." Luna fired back. "Perhaps you are the naïve one." A flash of incredulousness briefly shone in Nightmare Moon's eyes, and she shook her head. "Luna, we know you blame yourself for what happened all those centuries ago, as you should. Admit it, you feel anger against yourself, don't you?" Once again, Luna felt the sting of dread pierce her heart. However, she continued to try her hardest to be stoic, not that it mattered. "We know you do." The reflection continued. "As time goes on, you will only hate yourself more and more. We also know that I feed off of anger and hate. It doesn't matter if it is directed against somepony else or yourself, it feeds me regardless…" Nightmare Moon paused, and gave a slight, menacing smile. "Eventually, I shall grow powerful enough to take over again. Except this time, we shall do away with Twilight Sparkle and the others before they can use the power of harmony against us. Then we can get what we have been owed." Luna looked in disbelief and dread at the reflection smiling up at her. She was right. Luna had been angry towards herself, and she couldn't find a way to stop it. If she didn't find a way to stop hating herself, Nightmare Moon would eventually grow too powerful. "That is why I seek forgiveness from the one pony who can help me forgive myself." Luna said quietly, her countenance having become subdued. Nightmare Moon laughed lightly, throwing her head back mockingly. "Casemate isn't going to forgive us!" She said condescendingly. "That is a foregone conclusion, and you know it!" Luna drew in a breath. Her other personality had brought up a point which she had been grappling with for months now. She needed his forgiveness. In order for her to even have a chance at forgiving herself and putting away her shame and guilt, she needed to know that she was forgiven by him. But he was not likely to forgive her. After all, she was the one who allowed Nightmare Moon to take over and destroy his family… "I… I have to try…" Luna said shakily, her stoicism breaking. "Why?" The reflection asked. "Why do you try so hard to fool yourself?" "Because I don't know what I shall do if I don't!" Luna snapped back, her words being driven by a burst of emotion. "If there is a sliver of a chance that I can keep you weak and unable to take control of us, then I'm going to take it!" Nightmare Moon stared maliciously at Luna with narrowed eyes for a few seconds, clearly not pleased with her reply. "Tsk! Tsk! How very noble." She mocked. "It won't change anything." Luna shot a fierce glare back, causing the reflection to appear taken by surprise for a split second. "I don't care." The princess said slowly. "As long as I try my hardest to keep you at bay, I cannot possibly care less about my chances at forgiveness. Keep that in mind." Nightmare Moon looked as if she were at a loss for words at Luna's defiance. For what felt to be a minute or more, both Luna and her reflection looked at each other in silence. Then, Nightmare Moon spoke. "So be it." She grumbled. "You have clearly made up your mind." She paused, looking sternly up at the princess. "But make no mistake, you shall not be forgiven." "We shall see about that." Luna said defiantly, taking a final look at the monster looking up at her. Then she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and opened them again. To her relief, she saw herself in the floor again, no sign of Nightmare Moon remaining. Feeling as if she were alone again, she looked up at the night sky as she processed her encounter with her dark personality. She wished for nothing more than to believe that Nightmare Moon was wrong. She wanted to believe that she could be forgiven, that she could finally be able to forgive herself and not feed Nightmare Moon with her own self-loathing. After all, Equestria was at stake. If Nightmare Moon took over, she would make sure that the six bearers of the Elements of Harmony would be disposed of before subjugating Equestria to her tyrannical will. Luna had several potential solutions in mind to defeat Nightmare Moon, and keep her too weak to do anything. Gaining the Warden's forgiveness was the best solution. If he could forgive her, then there was no doubt in her mind that she could forgive herself. If he didn't, she had a more desperate contingency plan. But she had no way of knowing if it would be effective in the long term, though. If that plan were to fail, that left only one alternative to ensure that Nightmare Moon wouldn't take control. She would end her own life. Of course, Luna dreaded the thought. That would be a last resort, if Nightmare Moon couldn't be restrained after all. For Celestia's sake, as well as her friends', she hoped that it would not come to that. Still, the thought of potentially having to resort to something that would cause such unimaginable grief to her sister and friends caused a few tears to form, glinting in the moonlight as they fell. She stood there for a minute or two, sniffing and wiping away the tears as she struggled to come to grips with just how dark of a situation that she was in. It was heartrending. If she hadn't allowed Nightmare Moon to take full control in a moment of weakness, she and Celestia would have ruled together for the past thousand years, and the Warden would have remained with his family. Instead, she gave in and allowed all these horrible things to happen… But now, there was no changing what had happened. The only thing left was to do what she could to atone. If she didn't, Equestria would be put at risk by Nightmare Moon once more. She has to pull it together, and try. There was no point in wallowing in self-pity and depression, not while there was anything that she could do about it. The princess of the night took a few deep breaths, steadying herself and thinking about her interaction with her dark side. Slowly, a sense of anger began to boil against Nightmare Moon. She was evil and manipulative, Luna knew this. She had suffered so much because of Nightmare Moon, as did other innocent ponies. As her anger began to refine into resolve, Luna realized that she needed to defy Nightmare. She needed to give it a try. At that moment, Luna realized that instead of the suffocating, controlling fear that had successfully dissuaded her from trying to ask for the Warden's forgiveness that she had felt night after night, she felt something new. There was resolve, but there was also something else… It was not just her determination that was urging her to go further than she had dared to go before.  There was also hope. Deep down within her, a flicker of warmth defied the icy wind seeming to pierce her dense, dark fur. She remembered Apple Bloom's words of encouragement, of how the Warden wasn't completely consumed by hate, but rather how he had proven that he still had a genuinely good heart. While Luna knew this to be true, she hadn't quite realized just how significant the hope granted by this fact really was until now. When she finally came to the full realization of what Nightmare Moon was going to do if she was left unhindered, Luna knew why she needed to step up and try. But it was the hope left by Apple Bloom's encouragement that allowed Luna to summon the willpower to act upon that need. Luna looked thoughtfully at her glimmering stars above. For a few short seconds, a defiant warmth filled her heart, and a faint smile played across her lips as she realized the full impact of the filly's words. She knew what Apple Bloom was saying, but she didn't quite know just how potent they were until she had to face the bleak predictions of Nightmare Moon. Even the smallest light burns brightest in the dark, not unlike the stars in the void above. The princess sighed, closing her eyes. For the first time, she had both the resolve and the hope required to overcome her guilt, shame, and fear to take what she felt was the biggest risk that she had taken in centuries. She was going to ask for his forgiveness tonight. She stood up straight and closed her eyes, her beautiful, slender frame blending in with the dark sky as her mane and tail glinted and shimmered in the moonlight. Then, her horn began to glow, as she prepared to send herself into the dream realm. Tonight, she was going to do what needed to be done.