//------------------------------// // Epilogue: Praise // Story: Singles Combat // by MrNumbers //------------------------------// The pause for breath was entirely figurative. They’d spent more time than Luna could keep track of exploiting their very lack of a need to breathe. How does one keep track of time by their heart’s beat when the beat came faster than one could count?  It was unclear where Twilight’s voice came from, now, they were too intertwined in the tent. Everywhere, maybe. “I just figured it out. You have a praise kink.” “A what?” “A-” Twilight thought hard about it, face scrunching up from the effort. Her eyes opened again. “Okay. So, you know how there’s that theory that a lot of our… interests stem from our anxieties? I think- Well. I think you might like emotional validation a lot.” Luna blinked. “Yes, who doesn’t?”  “No, I mean…” Twilight thought hard about her words. “Okay, so you want to be recognized by someone whose recognition matters. And before about an hour ago, that was probably just Celestia right? Except, as much as I love her - and that’s a lot - she’s really, really, really bad at that, right?” “I know how dear a sister I am to her.” Luna said, guardedly. “She is forthright with that.” Twilight rolled her eyes. “I’m just saying, remember the time I was under so much pressure from her, back when I was still a unicorn and didn’t know she was grooming me for the whole Princess thing, which she never told me she was doing? I snapped so bad I put a mind control spell on Ponyville just to have something to write a report about to her, and when she learned about how badly I’d just broken under the stress she’d put on me, she made it feel like my fault for having a breakdown. I’d never seen her so mad and I was scared of how badly I messed up, but…” Twilight shook her head. “I had my friends as well. And I don’t think you did.”  “I had friends.”  “You turned Nightmare because you got mad everyone fell asleep at night.” Twilight pointed out. Luna grimaced. “You make it sound quite irrational, put so simply.”  Twilight kissed the tip of Luna’s nose. “Do you, Princess Luna, recognize me as a rightful and just authority, of great wisdom and countenance, worthy and able of judging you? Do you recognize me as one who will take solemn pride in her deliverance and utterance of all things she deems true of you, and do you recognize that it must be true if I am the one saying it of you?”  Luna felt very small suddenly. Like the entirety of her being was compressed down into a tight ball in her stomach, and the rest of her body was just a puppet of that little ball of gut. Like something great and dreadful would happen to her if she said yes, but any other answer would be a lie. “I do.”  Twilight nodded. “Well. Let’s start with the obvious. You’re very beautiful. Tall, slender, just a very uniquely lithe build that I’ve never seen on anypony else. It suits you. Even other alicorns like Cadance are - well Cadance is gorgeous, but we’re soft, right? I think even though I’m bigger than you now, you’re still obviously stronger than me just because of how tight and athletic you are.”  Luna squirmed. “You think that so obvious?” “Yeah, a mirror could tell you the same thing.” Twilight kissed Luna’s cheek. “That was enough to set you off, huh?”  “Well, I put great work into my health.” Luna admitted. “And I know alicorns are known for our beauty. I just had not considered… I had not thought that I might be considered especially beautiful among them, no. I know I am a shadow to my sister, certainly, but-” “I like you more, honestly.” Twilight said. “Physically. I think your mane’s way prettier, with the flowing night? I was kind of disappointed when I kept growing and I realized I was just going to end up more like her shape, honestly. Well, now I have yours to myself, I don’t mind so much.” Luna lost track of time again, of her racing heartbeat. No, Twilight definitely was on to something about how she would receive compliments. She had not realized the physical effect they would have on her - her mouth dried, her calves cramped from the force of suppressing her uncomfortable squirming, she wanted to run out the tent and never be seen again. She wanted to be buried in the deepest hole she could dig for herself and never emerge again. Yet she could not pull herself away from hearing more. “You have less obvious things to say about me, as well?”  Twilight grinned. “I know that you’re self-conscious about your speech still being pre-modern, but I honestly really like it. That whole thing I did asking if you trusted my judgement? I’d never say it like that to anyone else, but I knew you’d appreciate it. It’s not just that it’s dramatic, it’s that it’s really specific. There’s so much intentionality to everything you say, like you put so much care into being understood. I admire it a lot.”  “I- Well, yes, that is a difficulty I’ve had in adjusting to more modern speech.” Luna admitted. “It does feel a lot more like I must speak vaguely and trust the listener to simply understand what I mean. Yet, somehow, others seem to be able to. I… feel so much more self-assured when I know I can speak with clarity.” Twilight hugged Luna tight. “See, this is what I mean. I tell you that I like that clarity, and it’s like I’m hurting you. Or like I’ve caught you stealing something from me?” Luna nodded because yes, that was far more what it felt like. It did hurt a little, but only because it hurt to get caught taking something which you did not earn and did not belong to you. “A compliment is not owed a confession, Lunana bread. I like that you’re telling me about yourself, it’s interesting, but I don’t think good things about you just because you’ve tricked me. Or maybe it’s more like you’re trying to explain why you haven’t earned the praise, yet?”  Twilight had her dead to rights, that’s exactly what it felt like. With every wonderful, lovely kind word Luna felt the praise so wonderful she could not imagine anything she had done that could possibly justify this positive opinion of her. She became increasingly fearful she would do something to disappoint or betray this too-wonderful view of her, that the compliment must come from a place of misunderstanding that needed correction. Still she craved it more than she knew possible.  Through the drunken, heady haze she caught something more important still.  Luna cocked her head. “Did you truly call me Lunana bread?” “Yeah, I wasn’t really thinking about it, it just kind of came out.” Twilight flushed. “I’m new to the girlfriend thing, I don’t really know how to do pet names. Is it bad?” “Awful.” Luna giggled. “I did not hate it, this once, but best not to make a habit of it.”  “First try!” Twilight cheered. “Anyway, it’s really cute how good you are with children. Foals love you. I think it always says something really good about someone, because kids are people you can’t get anything from, just give to. I don’t think it’s possible for someone to be as good with them as you are without enjoying selflessness for its own sake, and that’s really sweet.”  “It’s just that, the children so often are more understanding of me than their parents. That makes for pleasant company.” Luna blushed from the tips of her ears and down to her neck. She was burning hot, now.  “They just have less preconceived notions.” Twilight lifted her chin and pulled Luna’s head to be tucked underneath, warm against her. “It’s not your fault. Everyone who doesn’t have an idea of what a pony ‘should’ be like clearly likes you for what actually ‘is’.  That one actually brought Luna to tears, much to her own surprise. She didn’t notice it at first, not until the bit of sniffle had started to run down the back of her throat. Only then did she take a heavy blink to test her eyes, and felt her eyelashes sticky and wet.  Twilight pulled back. “Too much?” “When one is hungry for too long, they no longer feel the pain of it.” Luna said. “I should be saying kind things about you as well.” “Nah,” Twilight dismissed, bringing Luna tight against her chest again and stroking her mane. Long, slow and patient strokes with the tip of her hoof pressed against the back of Luna’s neck in a most wonderful, most soothing way. “I already know how good I am. Actually, I’ve decided I’ll be quite cross with you if you try.”  “Whatever for?” Luna suddenly felt guilty about making Twilight’s chest damp, so she turned her face away as she pressed against her. She wished they were on a proper bed, now, instead of the large camping cot on the tent.  “Because then it’d be too much like you owe me anything for saying this, and you’re trying to find ways to pay me back.” Twilight faked sounding like she was stern, fake even to Luna’s ears. “How could you owe me for the truth? The truth could only ever be a debt that we are owed.”  This, Luna thought, is what she got for making out with a legal scholar. She tried to say as much with all the sarcasm she could muster, but found herself too burdened by Twilight’s sincerity to manage it. “Surely the debt is paid, then. I cannot imagine any more that could be said.”  “You are such a brat.” Twilight kissed the top of Luna’s head. “You ready for a really big one?”  Luna nodded, though inside she screamed. With a hoof she twirled a handle of the thin sheet over Twilight's cot and gripped it tight to prepare herself. Twilight whispered mischievously in Luna’s ear, as if she were letting her in on a wicked secret; “Just because Celestia’s better with ponies, and everyone loves her so much, doesn’t mean it’s your fault when you feel neglected or like you’re a disappointment. Sometimes it really is just her fault for making you feel that way, and she does feel bad about that because she’s bad at that. You don’t deserve to feel that way, and you never did.” “No, I-” Luna started to correct Twilight immediately because what she said had to be wrong. There was no alternative. “These are my mistakes, my failures. I will not offload the burden of them onto my sister for…” She stopped. “I cannot blame Tia for- She is not the one who turned into a Nightmare.”  “Yeah, and I mind controlled a town with a stuffed doll because she didn’t notice how badly she was messing me up, and I loved her and admired her so much I took it for granted when she yelled at me, I just blamed myself too.” Twilight said. “I’m still the one that did the mind control, you’re still the one that embraced the Nightmare. Celestia… just makes the kind of mistakes where other ponies get the blame for it. Talking to Sunset Shimmer really helped clear my head on this.” Luna winced. “It had not occurred to me how many of my sisters’ students turn to madness. I had thought the only fault was that she had made bad choices in students.”  “That wouldn’t explain why her wonderful, really cool sister is crying because I started complimenting her.” Again Twilight whispered in Luna’s ear, but this one was soft. As if the words themselves were so harsh and heavy that Twilight had to let them down with as much gentleness as she could. “Just because you’ve been starved of recognition doesn’t mean it’s all you deserve.”  “Tell me more?” Luna begged, and with her face still tight against Twilight’s chest, she felt Twilight’s smile against her ear as her widening lips pushed against it. “I like your poetry. The way you can go between grim stoic severity and excited playfulness is extremely charming. Your magic really is beautiful. The way you act as the guardian of dreams shows how talented you are with that magic, but it also shows your kindness and your selfless dedication. It’s something that, if you stopped doing it, nobody would be physically hurt by it. There’s almost never any physical danger from it. But you still treat it with the same sense of urgency as if they would, because even that much suffering is unconscionable to you.” “Thank you.” Luna was shivering. She was completely burning up, now, her stomach filled with every species of butterfly imaginable. Nobody had made this much of an effect in all her long years, and never with such simple words uttered so plainly. They could not have been so potent otherwise - if she had detected even a single thread of flattery at which to pull at, the entire thing would have unravelled. Twilight was very careful to limit what she was saying only to exactly what she meant, without hyperbole.  “I like the way your cutie mark takes up so much of your butt.” Twilight said. “I know it’s a weird one, but it’s interesting to me. Your writing’s really pretty, too, the way you do calligraphy? I like that you’re an amazing kisser, because I have been uh, I’ve been really self-conscious about learning.” Twilight’s confidence crumbled a little at that, as she admitted it with a blush. “I think that’s all I can think of right now though. I think we’ll have to spend some more time together, so you can remind me of everything else, and I’ll tell you when I remember.”  Luna nodded, basking in Twilight’s desire for more time together, and she untangled herself to make a request. “Might I kiss you, now? Not because I feel you are owed a reward for your kindness, but because I desire to kiss someone so kind?”  “I’d like that, too.”  And because Luna had asked so sweetly, she got to be the one to kiss Twilight.