//------------------------------//
// I Remember Rainbow Dash pt 6 
// Story: Short Scraps and Explosions 
// by shortskirtsandexplosions 
//------------------------------//


I Remember Rainbow Dash – by short skirts and explosions

Act 1 – Chapter 6 – Why Do the Eyes in Twilight Sparkle?


A violet-hot Sun melts over the Western Horizon, casting a violet glow over the last glistening inches of rooftops in downtown Ponyville.  One by one—as the wandering hoovesfolk dwindle thinner and thinner in the streets—the lanterns dotting the streets are lit, so that a warm gold haze fills the space between buildingfaces.  The gentle roar of the great spinning world deflates to a soft hum as the first of many crickets wakes for a nocturnal symphony.
The air cools and the ground hushes, the blades of grass wilting under the condensing moisture of an atmosphere pent up with a day's worth of energy, imploding breathlessly as scant traces of the afternoon blink into nothing, giving way to the indigo kiss of full blanketed evening.
A few young fillies giggle and murmur about one rumor or another as they trot their ways home.  A patrolling policepony helps an elderly mare across town square towards her destination.  On the far side of the town, a few late-working weather fliers swoop down, gather the last batch of midday clouds, and surge darkly towards the dwindling North like black comets.  The Sugarcube Corner's door grows dark as the owners pull the blinds over the windows, closing for the night.  Off in the distance, the Carousel Boutique's lights switch off from the inside—and several buildings flanking it cascade into the shadows, like a row of candles going out.
Ponyville is not asleep, but its invisible eyelids are growing heavy.  To the East, the distant speck of Canterlot glows like a torch.  To the West, the mountains swallow the last inch of the sun like the edge of a giant aperture.  And here—where life is simple and life is peaceful—everything is as serene as the Beginning of Time itself... ....as well as perhaps its End.
Rainbow Dash feels this.  She has just fluttered down to a perch atop a hilltop overlooking the now cold blue roofs of Ponyville.  The advent of night blows against her in a gentle cold wind, fluttering at her rainbow colored mane—bangs of brightness that challenge the oozing shadows of the world.  She takes a few heaving breaths, the bone shattering blood rush of the day—in all of its bully bashing and cloud kicking and Everfree Foresting and canyon racing—coming to a vein-pulsing cascade in her gut, melting finally into a cool exhale as her heart slows down to dance with the gentle sway of the sleepily mellow town that gazes back up at her with icy rooftop eyes.
Something floats out of the blue Pegasus' parting lips—perhaps a ghost, a surrender—and the colorful speedster of Cloudsdale—who knows no concept of stillness and no grasp of hesitation—finally relents to the bending of the globe, as she kneels down and folds her hooves underneath.  Her wings coil tightly to her side as she gently plops her snout down into the soft grass—breathing out long and hard through a pair of bruised, slightly scuffed nostrils.  The aches and pains of a spastic day—just like any other Rainbow Dash day—briefly surge through her, only to drift off like flower petals on a great black stream, dissolving away with a warm gasp in the Pegasus' throat:
“Meh...this is okay.”
Another breath; anvils hang from her left and right lungs.  She gazes her violet eyes skyward.  She blinks, and something blinks back.  Bright and distant—real and rich, but all too easily gone in a squint:  the first star of the evening.
Rainbow Dash's eyes curve.  A slight twitch, as things are pulled back, danced back, and yanked back all the same... ... ....










(Several Months Ago....)
   “There it is, girls!  There it is!”  Twilight Sparkle excitably chirped as she leaned forward on the spacious balcony of her brand new home.  She grinned wide, her rear hooves clopping up and down as she leaned her upper limbs on the wooden railing overlooking the edge of evening-drenched Ponyville.  “Come on!  The first star's already out!  You're gonna miss it!”
“We thought yer wanted—nnngh---this h-here contraption before you wanted us takin' a gander at the sky!”  Apple Jack strained as she and Rainbow Dash shoved a deceptively heavy telescope through the open doors and onto the middle of the balcony, scraping dust and wood chips in the hurculean effort.  “Hnnngh!”
“I do!  I do—Oh!  Girls, you've done so much already.  Here, allow me--”  Twilight half glanced backwards, her horn glowing brightly.  A stream of bright violet energy—and the telescope magically floated out of the suddenly lunging ponies' grasp.
“Ghhh—Wh-Whoah!”  Apple Jack and Rainbow Dash fell over each other.  They huddled in an awkward pile, gathering their bearings as Pinkie Pie giggled from the sidelines.  “Whew.... ...Ah reckon ah'm seeing stars already!”  Apple Jack shook the cobwebs out, picked up her hat with her teeth, dusted it off, and flung it directly upwards—ducking her head so that the cowfilly attire would plop securely over her skull.  “Yanno, Twilight—Next time you could warn a girl, don'tcha think?”
“Erm....” Twilight blushed rosily.  “S-Sorry.  G-Guess I'm just a bit too excited.”  She planted the telescope down at the edge of the balcony with gentle telekinesis and tilted it eastward.  “I didn't expect nightfall to happen so soon.”
Rainbow Dash got up and dusted off her wings with a grumble.  “Nnnngh...Yeah, well, time flies when you're moving a load of junk--”  She froze in mid sentence under the glare of a certain blonde filly.  “....er.....N-Not that I'm an expert on flying....er...time flying.  Or j-junk for that matter.”  She rolled her eyes.
“Hmmph....”  Apple Jack turned around and put on a polite smile as she trotted over to Twilight's side.  “We've been more than happy to help you move into Ponyville, Twilight.  Though why Princess Celestia figured you'd be at home in the loft of a lonely old tree library—Ah'll never guess.”  Apple Jack glanced quizzically at the astronomical device before turning her gaze once more towards the Unicorn newcomer.  “Reckon Ah should stick to apples and not real estate.”
“Are you k-kidding?”  Twilight smiled gently.  “This place is perfect!”  She motioned with her horn towards the lit interior of the toasty warm tree behind them.  “I've always wanted to work at a small town library.  Granted, I had way more books to read back in Canterlot—But here there are a whole slew of books I've never laid my eyes on before!  I can't even begin to imagine the kind of historical and scientific research I'll be able to do now that I live in Ponyville!”
“Y-Yeah.. .... ...”  Apple Jack gulped and put on a brave grin.  “Sounds like a good 'ol time to be had!”
“Yeah, if you were born under a rock!”  Rainbow Dash began to pantomime 'wretching'—WHAP!--a brown hat flew into her snout.  “D'oh!”  She glared at a frowning Earth Pony and ultimately sighed, wings drooping.
“I don't think I've ever seen one of these things before!”  A certain pink-hair'd filly bounced over to the side of the balcony and proceeded to squint up close to the telescope from over a dozen dramatic angles.  “Where's the 'On' button?”
Twilight giggled.  “There is no 'On' button, Pinkie.  It's simply a series of refracting mirrors constructed at appopriate distances and angles from each other within a cylindrical tube so as to provide a magnified look at--”
“BOOGERS!”  Pinkie Pie balanced precariously on the edge of the balcony, her tail flapping as she grinned and glared down the large end of the telescope aimed at the inside of Twilight's new house.
Twilight went cross-eyed, then shook her head and made a face:  “I-I beg your pardon?”
“I can see your boogers!  Heeheehe--”
“Pinkie Pie, you're looking down the wrong end--”
“Ohhhhh--”  Pinkie blinked over the stalk of the device then stared down the large end again.  “Ohhhh!  I see—those aren't boogers!  They're just Rarity and Fluttershy!”  She waved a hoof overhead.  “Heya guys!  Come out of Twilight's nose, will you...?—Whoah-Whoah-Whoah--!”  She suddenly teetered back towards a three story drop off the balcony--
Snatch!  Apple Jack grabbed the pink filly and effortlessly dragged her onto even planking, all the while shouting over her flank.  “Rarity!  Fluttershy!  Get yer tails out here!  Twilight says that the good stuff's about to start!”
“We're cominnnnng!”  An elegant voice sing-song'd from inside the wooden dwelling.  “Just as soon as Fluttershy and I eliminate the last vestiges of this awful dust!”
“Pleeeeease, girls!”  Twilight's ears drooped, accompanied by a sad frown.  “This is a once-in-a-lifetime moment!  Maybe even once-in-an-existence--!”
“But not all of Twilight's boxes are unpacked and I do so wish to see how her drapes of Canterlotlian Silk look around the windows!”
“M-Miss Rarity?  I r-rolled these rugs out onto the main fl-floor like you asked me to--”
“Please, darling—No need to call me 'Miss' anymore. We're friends now!  And---OHH!--no, dear, not that carpet!”
“B-But you said--”
“Those rugs won't do against this Ponyvillean wood!  And they clash with the drapes!  Oh heavens!--We've got to start over....”
“Like Granny Smith's bed pan y'all will start over!”  Apple Jack shouted once more as Pinkie bounced all around.  “All that fru-fru nonsense can wait!  You heard Twi!  This here's special!  So hoof to it!”
“Mmmm—Yes!  Fine!  No need to be positively oafish about it.”  The white Unicorn marches onto the balcony with a drooping yellow Pegasus in tow.  “Seriously, Twilight—if you want to get your new abode furnished appropriately—Invite us earlier in the day!”
“I-I'm sorry...” Twilight bit her lip.  “I figured if I asked for everyone to show up earlier, I'd be wasting your time--”
“Nothin' to it, gal!”  Apple Jack smiled.  “This is the most fun Ah've had in a heapin' long time.  Glad to have you setting up roof—er—branches in the center of Town!  Ponyville could use an ounce of Canterlot to give 'er some flavor!”
“Heheh—I guess.”  Twilight blinked at the shuffling Pegasus.  “You okay, Fluttershy?”
“I'm....uhm....”  She dug a hoof into the balcony and avoided the Unicorn's gaze.  “I-I'm sorry Miss Sparkle that your carpet didn't match the drapes--”
“Oh heavens, precious!”  Rarity briefly rolled her blue eyes.  “I was only teasing!  You truly do need to lighten up!”  She playfully nudged Fluttershy with the tiniest of featherlight taps.
“UNF!”  Fluttershy practically pratfalled, blushing wide as her wings twitched and she wobbled back up to an overtly feminine gait.
Rarity sweatdropped, gulped, and smiled awkwardly in Twilight's direction as she trotted forward.  “So—When do the majestic festivities begin?”
“I-I can't really say.. ....Except th-that it will be very, very soon.” Twilight breathily exclaimed.  “For the past nine hundred and ninety-nine years, it has been Princess Celestia who's raised the Moon.  Now that Princess Luna is back...”  She bit her lip and glanced nervously eastward beyond the distant speck of Canterlot.  “I frankly don't know how it's going to go.  F-For all we know, she may not even be doing it tonight.  You have to imagine that after so many years of imprisonment, she must be out of practice!”
“Well, she certainly does have quite a huge audience to impress!”  Rarity brushed a hoof against her neck and sticked her snout heavenward.  “Over half of Ponyville's residents have taken an exodus to Canterlot to witness the Lunar Rising up close!”
“I bet you wish you were with 'em, don'tcha?”  Apple Jack remarked with narrow, suspicious eyes.
“Oh—Don't be silly!  I mean.....”  Rarity fought it ever so briefly; but she ultimately lost to a deep sigh barreling up through her system.  “....sure, all of Equestria's finest will be there!  There will be Hoity Toity, Sapphire Shores, Trotter Swiftly—not to mention the finest in retro attire, reintroducing arcane Lunar Republican Gowns and Suits back into the fashion world for the first time in nearly a millenium!”  She took a deep, deep, deep breath—bottled up momentarily—and exhaled in a glistening smile summoned out of nowhere.  “But I say thee neigh!  I wouldn't want to be anywhere but here with my new BFFs!”  She scrunched down and gave Twilight and Apple Jack a hug with opposite arms.  “After all...”  She winked Twilight's way, her horn waving in the air.  “If Twilight Sparkle—the most gifted Unicorn apprentice of all Canterlotlian Magic—decided to stay here, then I would be an utter fool to want to be elsewhere!”
“Eheheh.....You're w-welcome, I think?”  Twilight gulped.
“SO!”  Pinkie Pie shot up randomly from beneath Rarity, consuming the center of the group.  “Is Princess Luna really going to moon us?  Huh?  Huh?”
“Pinkie Pie!”  Rarity barked.
“What?  Twi-Twi just said she would, didn't she?”
“I swear—Does anyone remember how to be a truly refined lady these days?  You do need to mind your manners!”
“I don't mind my manners!  They certainly don't get in the way of things!  What about yours?  Heeheehee--!”
“Rrrrghhh—And don't bump into Twilight so much!  This is her house and she needs her space--”
“Actually,  I-I'm quite fine--”
“HEY!  I just got the most super-kewlest idea!  When we're done watching Princess Luna strut her stuff across the stars, why don't we light a fire and have us some Sugarcube Corner Marshmallows?!”
“Hey!  Marshmallows sound great--!”
“Light a fire?!  Inside a library?!  Darling, are you as mad as your hair is curled?”
“Uhm—Guys...?”
“Momma Pie says that my hair is like this because of the Devil's Hoofiwork!  But I've never understood that—Because who in Equestria curls hair with hooves—Much less the Devil?  Say, do you think the Devil has cloven hooves?  That might explain how he does it, only why anyone would go to a salon run by the Devil I'll never know.  Maybe cuz the music's upbeat?”
“Oh my stars and garters—I positively give up!”
“Heeheehee—You know, the Canterlotlian Encyclopedia of the Equestrian Third Age suggests that the word 'devil' came from a root word in Diamond Dog tongue meaning 'bone'.  But that may be a tad bit redundant, considering that the Diamond Dog language has over forty-two words for 'bones'...”
“Ewwww—Bones?  I prefer my cupcakes boneless.  How about you?”
As the gaggle of young fillies continued to chat and murmur under the increasingly starry sky, a bored-looking Rainbow Dash hovered in the background, her arms folded.  A dim glaze washed over her eyes, and she yawned—her brightly colored mane drooping over a groaning face.
“Yeah... .... ...This is lame.  Screw this.”  With a stealthy smirk, she twirled about in mid-air, spread her wings, and made for the sky--
---only to be yanked to a stop in mid-air, her eyes bulging. Scrkkkk!
“Where d'ya think yer sky-scamperin' off to, Missy?”
Rainbow Dash sighed long and hard, sagging in mid-hover.  “Who's that mysteriously drawling voice biting onto my tail—Like I really have to flippin' ask?”  She glared back over her shoulder.
Apple Jack's teeth were clamped over the Pegasus' prismatic tail.  She spat out the hairs and trotted over so that her frowning face and hoarse voice could be tossed at Rainbow Dash beyond the range of the other ponies' hearing.  “What in tarnation is yer deal?  Are you fixin' to be a stick in the mud for a reason?”
“I could ask the same about you, buckarette!”  Rainbow Dash hissed back.  “You've been doing nothing all night but wrangling us all around Twilight Sparkle's side!  Why're you treating us like cattle?”
“Ah ain't treatin' you like no livestock!  If anything, Ah'm tryin' to stay in the spirit of friendship, which is the least Ah can say about you with your mopin' and your gripin' in the corner over here!”
“I'm not moping!”  Rainbow Dash squeaks back.
“Watcha doin', then?”
“I'm being fashionably silent!”
“You were fixin' to fly away!”
“Lots of other places in Equestria are fashionable!  Just listen to Miss Vampire over there--”
“Don't ya have a single guldarn'd inch of respect in that scrawny blue skeleton of yers?”
“Nope.”
Apple Jack growled under a whispery voice.  “Look—Twilight's been through a lot and it would really mean the world to her if we could all hang by the filly's side—Even if for a little bit!”
“And we haven't been through a lot?”  Rainbow Dash shrugged.  “I can't count the number of times I nearly lost my neck looking for those Harmonies of Element rocks!”
“Ah thought you fancied yerself a little adventure every now and then!”
“Yeah—when I'm in the spotlight!”
“Unngh—Land'o'Goshen—You are stubborn as a dried up stump!”  Apple Jack groaned.  She looked briefly sad as she then said:  “Don't you reckon it means something that you're supposed to represent Loyalty?”
“Yeah....”  Rainbow Dash nodded.  “It means I did my part--”  She pointed a hoof to herself.  “--and when it comes time that something else really big, bad, and ugly!sparkly comes to attack Equestria, then you guys can summon me again!  Cuz then it'll be exciting around here once more!”  She rolled her eyes boredly towards the other end of the balcony.  “Not like this....this....Filly Scout Campfire Foalsitter Club Mush-Mush!”
“Don't you see, Rain'bo?”  Apple Jack shook her head.  “Tonight is about more than just a bunch of gabbin' nonsense!  If you only paid a treasured moment like this some mind, then maybe you'd come to your senses about what we're all here for!”
“What?”  The Blue Pegasus folded her arms and snorted.  “Fate?  Obligation?”
“Bein' happy, girl...”  Apple Jack murmured.  “Flyin' crazily around at the drop of a hat may get you places, Rain'bo.  But Ah'd plum hate for you to miss out on something that's waitin' for you right here, below the clouds—If only ya stayed put for just once in yer life and gave it a look-see.”  She sighed and gazed aside.  “That's the funny thing about 'Loyalty'—Ah reckon—you gotta stay anchored in one place before you can learn to appreciate what it means to others... ...and maybe, just maybe...”  She glanced up with glistening eyes.  “--what it means to you.”  A punctuated smile, or at least an attempt at one; and Apple Jack slowly turned about, trotting back to join the others murmuing and giggling on the edge of the balcony.
“... ... .... ... ...” Rainbow took a deep breath.  She glanced skyward—towards the distant star-kissed clouds hovering invitingly overhead, like gray shades of the past.  A breath—a breath that turned into a groan, and finally a sigh; and the Blue Pegasus touched her hooves down to the balcony and trotted over until she was side by side with the girls... .... ...or at least side by side with Fluttershy.
“H-Hey, Rainbow Dash... ...” She gently smiled.
“Hey yourself.”  The multi-colored filly droned back.  “So what are we doing; just sitting here and waiting for the moon?”
“Mmmmhmmm....”
“Nnngh...” Rainbow plopped down on folded hooves.  “Great.  Really thrilling.”
“I know, isn't it?”  Fluttershy smiled, her snout tilting upwards.
Rainbow sweatdropped, glaring obviously at the yellow Pegasus.  But—just then:
“Omigosh!  There it is!”  Twilight Sparkle jumped up to her hooves and bounced in place in the style of the Pink Pony flanking her.  “It's rising!  It's rising!  Oh yes yes yes yes yes!”
“It is?  This soon?” Rarity gasped.
“Where?”  Apple Jack squinted, raising a hoof over her forehead.  “Ah'm a Day Pony by trade—Where is the gosh darn'd thing?”
“Up there—Due East!”  Twilight practically galloped sideways to the telescope and viciously swung it—nearly lopping off Pinkie's skull.  (“Yowsers!”)  “S-Sorry Pinkie Pie!  Ohhhhh come on come on come on---”  Twilight squinted through the telescope, gasped even harder, and nearly exploded as she pointed straight off the balcony's edge, her jaw gaping wide.  “There!”
All five pairs of eyes followed her limb—And sure enough a silver flame rose liquidly over the mountains of the Eastern Horizon.  For a brief second, the shadowy skeleton of Canterlot's spires were silhouetted by a bright white circle—And then the celestial object rose its virginal track upwards, casting a sheen of dim ivory over every crook and corner and niche of Ponyvillean architecture.  The world was briefly transformed into the copper bottom of a glass jar, lit alive by a tight swarm of snow white lantern bugs looming high in the zenith.
Rarity's eyes were sapphire saucers, her horn flickering briefly with an absent-minded surge of magical enchantment.  “Why....Wh-Why it's the brightest moonrise I've ever s-seen!”
“Oooooh....” Fluttershy's eyes sparkled.
“Hey!  H-Hey!”  Pinkie Pie pointed with a sharp gasp that betrayed her normally fearless self.  “The shadow's gone!  The shadow's gone!”
“Yes!  Y-Yes it is!”  Twilight nearly hyperventilated, rapidly switching her gaze from telescope to naked horizon to her new friends.  “The Mare in the Moon has been vanquished!  As soon as Luna was freed from the grips of Bitterness and Discord by the Elements of Harmony—the clouds of anguish left her!  Look!  L-Look at it!  A true Full Moon—The Mare Shadow is gone!”
“Well Ah'll be....”
“Oooooooh....”
“My stars—It's far more beautiful than I could have imagined!  Is this—Is this what the moon is going to look like from now on?  So crystal clear and... and....r-radiant?”
“D-Don't you see?”  Twilight beamed in a joy that nearly outshone the lunar object gracing the sky overhead.  “Right now—Before our eyes—Is a New Moon!  A New Moon for a New Age—The Fourth Age of Equestria!  And we—all of us—w-w-we're all alive!  All alive to witness th-this....” Twilight suddenly clamped her hooves over her mouth.  Tears welled in the corner of her moon-lit eyes.
“Twi?”  Apple Jack glanced over.  “Are you okay, sugarcube?”
Twilight's breath choked, rattling its way towards a teeth gritting smile as the tears rolled down her cheeks.  “Y-You have no idea how m-many times I've read about this....How often I dreamed th-that things would be this way—That Nightmare Moon w-would be vanquished, Harmony would prevail, and the New Age of the R-Reunited Sisters would....would....”  She rubbed her eyes and gulped hard, shuddering.  “I-I swear....it's positively too magical to be real.”
“Awwwww—How's this for realzies?”  Pinkie Pie explosively hugged the violet-haired Unicorn.
“Mmmm-Darling, we're all so glad that you're happy.”  Rarity trotted over and nuzzled her in addition.
Finally Apple Jack drifted in and rested a hoof on the shuddering Twilight's shoulder.  “We all did good, didn't we?  We harmonized the hayseed out of the Third Age!”
“With a Bang!  Rmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm-kerpisshhhhh!”  Pinkie glutteringly added.
“Heeheehee....”  Twilight sniffled, took a shaking breath, and gazed emotionally towards her nuzzling companions.  “Y-You wanna know th-the real reason I didn't stay in Canterlot j-just to see Luna raise the moon up close?”
“Why's that, Twilight?”
“Because....”  She breathed deeply, gulped, and calmed herself in time to smoothely murmur:  “I-I could have been with Princess Celestia, I could have been with the Royal Guard, I could have been in the same audience as all of Equestria's finest—But I wouldn't nearly have been happy as I am right now—right here in Ponyville—to be sharing this with all of you... ....With all of m-my friends...”
“Awwwwww...Heeheehee!”
“Darn tootin'!”
“Oh darling, you're going to make me fall apart into tiny little pieces!”
“We're very glad to have you with us, Twilight....” Fluttershy smiled.  She glanced softly aside at Rainbow Dash.
“.... .... ...” Rainbow was gazing at Twilight in the center of the crowd.  Her violet eyes were curved inward, as if navigating a murky minefield of confused sensations.  She stared hard at Twilight Sparkle—how her tears ran down a smiling face, how they glittered in the New Moonlight, how they reflected the warmth of hugging friends so close to her.  The blue Pegasus didn't know it yet, but these very things were about to be burned into the deepest and most secret walls of her mind, brushing elbows with memories that she had long cast by the wayside, memories that were always so easy to fly away from, but suddenly seemed so small and yet so huge at the same time.
She barely felt Fluttershy's nudging until the fourth time the yellow Pegasus' soft nose brushed against her.  “Hmmm-What-What?”  Rainbow Dash blinked her way.
“Are you okay, Rainbow Dash?”
“Pfft.  Yeah.  I don't get what all the fuss is about.”
“Heehee—Don't you?”
“Nnnnngh...... .... ...” She took a deep breath, clearing her throat and muttering towards the dimly lit heavens:  “I give it about a week.”
“Give what a week?”
“This.”  She motioned to Twilight.  “That.”  She motioned to the moon.  “All of it.”  She bowed her head towards herself.
“Do you really feel like that?” Fluttershy blinked.
“Sometimes....”  Rainbow's voice was a dry river.  “A lot of times, I just don't feel, Fluttershy.”
“Mmmm...” Fluttershy nodded.  “Sometimes you don't have to feel, Rainbow Dash.  You only have to be.”
Rainbow's head raised to glance at her, eyebrow raised.  A strangely beating heart.  Slowly, icily, a devil-care-smirk formed.  “That easy, huh?”
“Mmmmm.......N-No....” Fluttershy blushed aside.
“Heeheehee....”  Rainbow exhaled smilingly.  “Tell you what...” Rainbow scooted over and stretched a wing out to rest on Fluttershy's shoulder.  “You continue doing the 'Kindness' thing, and I'll work on the whole 'Loyalty' crud.  How's that sound?”
“Deal.”  Fluttershy smiled bashfully with a nod.
Rainbow Dash took a deep, therapeutic breath.  As she felt Fluttershy's soft weight lean into her, she calmly observed as the other three fillies crowded around the telescope aimed at the great glowing moon, and Twilight Sparkle in turn.
“Aaaaaand—There!  If you look closely, you can see the Valley of Ice—Where water is believed to have liquified near to the moon's poles.”
“Wow—OOOH!  Kewlies!  Kewlies!  I can sooooo see it!”
“You reckon there's really water on the moon?”
“Well—I suppose Princess Luna could tell us all now!  Ohhhh—I can't wait until she comes up with a memoir or something!”
“Ungh—Please, Twilight!  How positively garrish that would be!  Who would want to read a book about a thousand year imprisonment under the posession of an inharmonious spirit?”
“It's all about the history and science of the matter—Oooh!  Pinkie, lemme move it again—Ahhh—There!  That—yes, yes, yes—Omigosh!  That has to be the gates to Ponymodium!  Luna's Castle built out of Moondust!  With the Mare in the Moon blanketing it all these years, it was always virtually unseen via telescope--(SQU-e-E-e-E-e-E!)--This is so exciting!”
“Hey, you think there're cupcakes on the moon?”
“Now why in the hay would there be cupcakes on the moon?  Luna was imprisoned, not doin' take-out!”
“Oooh!  I know!  We should totally bake a bunch of cupcakes for Princess Luna!”
“Mmmm—The Breakfast of Queens.”
“Hahahaha!”
“Heh heh heh...”
“Heeheehee!”










The clear moon looms overhead, shimmering silver rays down onto the nightscape of Ponyville as Rainbow Dash rests there, gazing, staying in one place...
A deep breath, and she thins her eyes—She weathers another breeze that kicks against her mane of colors.  Shuddering slightly, her violet optics flutter earthward, as many lonely quiet nights battle with fewer laughter-filled nights in the shadowed vestiges of her wilting head; she starts instinctively to murmur something, something she hasn't said since she was a young filly.  Something like a prayer, a plead.  But before it can so much as squeak forth into the chilly air--
“It's still so beautiful.”
Rainbow Dash gasps.  Jumping undaintily up to her feet, she flashes a look over her shoulder—and immediately calms.
Twilight Sparkle stands on the hilltop behind Rainbow, smiling—gazing up towards the source of the silver shimmer that's reflecting off her violet eyes.  A purple felt scarf flutters in the wind, fashioned snugly to her craning neck.  She tosses her mane briefly before sitting down aside the blinking Pegasus and monologuing forth:
“Every night after night—Without fail—Luna has successfully and gracefully done her half of the Royal Duty.  Every evening—since the week after we finally freed her with the Elements of Harmony—she's pulled this miracle off.  And still, after all of these months—So many sleeps taken for granted, so many fresh mornings spent alive—It never ceases to amaze me.  The Fourth Age is here; the Fourth Age is now.  And we stand on the threshhold of a new era—Not knowing what tomorrow may bring, but always invigorated by a gorgeous moonrise.”
Rainbow Dash feels an impulse to groan or yawn—but for some reason feels utterly compelled to do neither; she merely stands there, waiting for Twilight to get her words out.
And she does—turning around to smirk up at Rainbow.
“How's it feel, Rainbow?”
“Er.....”  The Pegasus shifts nervously.  “H-How's what feel?”
Twilight smiles sweetly.  A slight giggle.  “To have been a part of bringing in a New Moon to this world?”
“Hmmm....”  Rainbow Dash shrugs.  “Don't look at me.  That was all you, girl.  Well—All Luna, but because of you—I guess.  'Magic Spark' and all.  Then the bling around our necks.  Then the flashing lights.  Da da da daaaaa.  Power Ponies.  Mare-a-Zord.  Bingo!”
“Heeheehee....”  Twilight Sparkle folds her limbs under her and gazes down the hillside towards the tranquil rooftops of Ponyville.  “You may not be Pinkie Pie, Rainbow.  But you have your own brand of random.”
“Boy, would that be a sideshow in the making!”  She pads over and squats down besides Twilight, both ponies resting on the crest of the moonlit hilltop.  “I'd have to open up an 'Awesomecube Corner'.  All-you-can-eat-kicks-in-the-head from nine to five.  Free Sonic Rainboom refills.  You pay for your melting eyes in Wonderbills.  Last one who survives gets a special autograph from yours truly and then a free key to the underground vault so as to escape the fiery catapults from all other living things who want to grab my signature from her.”
“Okay—You can stop proving me wrong.”  Twilight drones.
“That's why you don't write checks that your flank can't catch.”  Rainbow nods, then adds with a nonchalant:  “How's it hoofin', Twi?”
“Mmmm—I was out here looking for you, actually.”
Rainbow winces.  “Yeesh—Don't say that.  You'll creep the moment away.”
“Oh—Are w-we having a moment?”
“Sure, why not?”  Rainbow yawns and plops down, exhaling a flurry of loose grass blades into the starry night.  “Nnnnngh....”
Twilight raises a humored eyebrow.  “Long day?”
“Yeah.  About eighty-five pages worth.”
“R-Really?”  Twilight's neck cranes back as her face distorts into a wretch of disbelief.  “Your letter to the Princess is that long?”
“No, not that—I was talking about the ponyf—Ugh....”  Rainbow Dash shakes her head so that we can skip that line.  “But on that topic, yeah—I've written a lot; darn you to heck.”
“Awwww—Was it really that much of a chore?”
“Errr....Dghh—Well, at first it was kind of crazy boring.  But then—I dunno...”  Rainbow Dash gazes down at her hooves kneading the earth.  “You told me to write from the heart.  But that didn't work so well for me—So I settled for halfway and wrote from the gut.  I hope that makes you happy.”
Twilight giggles again.  “I'm not the one you should be concerned with making happy.”
“Why not?  You're the one who talked me into doing this hoof-cramping thing to begin with.”
“Well...” Twilight gazes aside, blushing slightly.  “I was kinda sorta wanting to find you so that I could ask you about your progress--”
“--if you would call it that.”
“What, you're close to being done?”
“I....uhm....”  Rainbow blinks.  She glances back and fiddles with the weight of the scroll tucked under her left wing.  “.....I....I-I dunno.  I've certainly written a lot of nonsense.  I guess you can only go on for so long before you need to trim stuff down and make it all presentable--”
“It's a personal letter, Rainbow.  Not a novel.”
“Heh, if you say so.”  The Pegasus chuckles and gazes down at Ponyville.  “Knowing you, Twilight, Of Mice and Mares by John Steinbuck is nothing more than a hurricane pamphlet.”
“Well, I have full faith that you put together something that'll be integral to Princess Celestia's understanding of our most recent discovery.”
“I....eheheh...” Rainbow Dash nervously sweatdrops and stirs from where she squts.  “I-I'm not too sure that the Princess is exactly gonna get any of this.  I'm not sure even if I get any of this.”
“Oh you're just being hard on yourself.”
“Twilight—Don't you think that a Princess is the last person you'd want to expose to one's personal dribble on other ponies and their personalities and their feelings and their--”  She stops midway, wilting under the cold gaze of a not-so-humored Twilight.
“Jee—I dunno.  Does anypony else you know inundate the Royal Matriarch of Sun-rising with Friendship anecdotes—like—everyday?”
Rainbow Dash gulps and smiles nervously.  “Guess I'm not the only who's coming form the gut today.”
“Hmmm...” Twilight cocks her head to the side with a gentle grin.  She flings the loose end of the breeze-blown scarf back around her neck.  “So, you're close to finished?”
“Meh.  Call me done.”  Rainbow Dash flaps her wing, rolls the scroll over her neck, juggles it with her skull and snout—then clasps it in her hoof.  “It's a far-far better thing than I've ever chicken-scratched before.  And I mean that in every possibly literal expression you could ever want to vomit onto paper.”
“Whew!  I can tell what a day of writing has done for you!”  Twilight chuckles.  “I'm not sure if I should be scared or not.”
“Will you just take the dang scroll?”
“Okay, okay, Rainbow...”  The violet haired Unicorn reaches her hoof for the scroll.  Her reach stops about halfway as her eyes fall upon a wayward thought drifting through the darkness between her and her Pegasus friend.
Rainbow Dash merely raises a curious eyebrow, watching with unnerving patience as a gentle breeze kicks against them both, stretching the moment.  Twilight gazes up, her eyes deep pools of violet sincerity.
“You do realize—That if you never had flown that one fateful day, so many years ago, to defend Fluttershy's honor—We wouldn't be here tonight, having this conversation, working together to bring a letter to the Princess that reveals so much about....about....”  A deep breath, a gentle smiling rising up from within.  “.... ...about how tiny things in a huge world can bring complete strangers together and make their lives complete—and not just their lives, but the lives of countless others...”
“Countless others... ... ...?”  Rainbow Dash squints.  “The heck are you getting on?”
“Have you ever thought about it—I mean really thought about it, Rainbow?”  Twilight Sparkle takes a shuddering breath.  “I mean, I know it's been less than twenty-four hours since we all found out about how we got our cutie marks... ... ...But I've lost sleep over it.  Because it occurred to me—Without our pasts, we'd never have become friends.  Without our friendships, we'd never have found the Elements of Harmony.  And without the Elements of Harmony... ... ...”  She gazes solemnly up into the silver glow of the night.  “... ....would we really be enjoying this beautiful clear moon we have above us now?”
“... ... ... ...” Rainbow Dash gazes at her, up at the sky, at her, then at the sky again.  “Beats me—Can I take the Physical Challenge?”
“Rainbow!!!”
“Seriously--”
“I too am serious!”  Twilight sighs, shakes her head, and smiles helplessly.  “Oh well.  I guess it's just silly me.  You know I always get so sentimental over... ....over stuff like this.”
“Twilight...” Rainbow briefly groans.  “You know me as well.  I don't hold too much weight in....in....well—in everything like you do!  I'm sure if the past was different, fate would have—er—arranged the Elements of Harmony to do what they needed to do, even without us.”
“But what we have—This world we live in—The friendship that we share... ... ...it's about more than fate.  And this isn't just about the Elements of Harmony—but about your Sonic Rainboom as well.”  She smiles, eyes moistening like a stone skipping across the puddle of yesterday.  “It's magic.  Always has been, always will be.  I....I-I hope, Rainbow, that you understand exactly how much this... ...erm.......h-how much you mean to me.”
“.... ... .... ...” Rainbow Dash stares blankly back.  She does all she can to ignore a growing lump in her throat.
“Mmmm—Ahem.  But I could go on and on and on and on and on and on--”  Twilight laughs nervously to herself, sniffles herself dry, clears her throat, and reaches all the way for the scroll.  “Here, lemme relieve you already--”
“No.”  Rainbow pulls the scroll back.
Twilight blinks at her.
“Erm....that is....Eheh...” The Blue Pegasus coughs, bites her lip, then bravely smiles.  “I-I-I think I've got....g-got one last thing to write about.  If th-that's kewl with you.”
“.... ... ...” Twilight Sparkles smiles warmly back at her.  “And I know just where you can do it.”








“Spike!”  Twilight Sparkle calls forth as she trots in through the front door to her library/tree/house/playset interior.  “We've got company!”
“Twilight!  Finally--!”  The stumpy little draconian scampers over breathlessly.  “Where in Equestria have you been?  Pinkie Pie says that everyone's in place and all you need to do is fetch--”  The violet-scaled whelp freezes in place at the sight of Rainbow Dash, his eyes bulging.  He slumps back on his heels and fiddles his claws behind his back.  “Err—I mean.  Ahem.  Twilight?”  He cackles in overexuberant gravitas.  “Company?!  Th-This late?!  What's the world coming to?!”
“Spike... ...” Twilight Sparkle smiles cooly, whipping her scarf off and hanging it from a nearby rack.  “It's barely seven-thirty.”  She clears her throat, her betrayingly razor sharp eyes darting back and forth between him and the general area of the multi-colored visitor.
“Yeah, but...”  He leans forward and whispers not-so-subtley in the Unicorn's flickering ear.  “When the little hand is on eight... ... ..”  He blinks once more up at Rainbow Dash and sweats sulfuric bulbs.  “... ....sarsaparilla hits the fan.”
“Will you just relax?”  Twilight hisses back, breathily.
Rainbow Dash throats:  “Hey, you two—Doesn't Pictionary require a marker board?”
“Ahem—We were just... ...Uhm....” Spike gulps, glancing between Twilight and Rainbow Dash.  “... ...discussing....the next meteor shower?”
“I thought Twilight had said that there wasn't going to be a meteor shower for another month...”
“Did I say meteor shower?” Spike toys nervously with his tail.  “Wh-What I meant was partial-lunar-eclipse!  Twilight Sparkle and I know these things.  Why?  Because books!”
“Be a good dragon and fetch me something from—I dunno—the furthest part of the library.”
“To the Fitness Section I go!”  Spike trots past the Blue Pegasus.  “Hiya, Dashie.”
“Hey yourself, Sprocket.  Looking good.”
He glares at her.  “Yanno, ponies tend to call me 'Spike'.”
“Yeah, good luck with that. Twilight?--Got a writing spot somewhere in this place that actually isn't pot-marked by the impression of your hooves?”
“Heeheehee—Maybe.  Here, follow me--” Twilight trots up the steps with Rainbow hovering in tow.  After a winding ascent, she nudges a door open to a third story room with a double paneled window looking out onto the Town Square of central Ponyville.  “This is my new favorite writing place—And I promise you that it doesn't smell like bookmarks yet.”
“I bet it smells like bookmar--”  Rainbow Dash does a double-take.  “Well aren't you quick at the draw?”
“Hee-hee-hee—It helps to be prepared.”
“The day you learn to predict me, Twilight, is the day I eat Apple Jack's hat.”
“I'll be sure to tell her that.”
“Yeah, just don't tell her hat.”  Rainbow Dash trots up to a podium propped up against the window as Twilight magically lights a pair of lanterns on either side.  Laying the parchment of the letter onto the podium, Rainbow produces Scootaloo's metal writing utensil and slides it firmly over her left hoof.
“Ooooh....” Twilight smiles, glancing at the object as she finishes lighting the last lantern.  “An Earth Pony writing brace!”
“You mean you've seen one of these things before?”
“Well—In books.”
“What don't you see in books, Twilight?  I swear—one day you'll get married, but the honeymoon will get canceled cuz the groom will have to go back into the drop box by 6pm.”
“Heeheehee—Several philosopher ponies of the Third Age used devices like this to write some of the most important ethical dissertations of our culture.  Aristrotle, Descolte, Neightzsche, Camule—None of them could slow down too much or else their brilliant thoughts would fly straight off the pages and into oblivion.  But—I must say—this is the most elegant looking type I've seen...”
“Let's just say that history has a nifty way of repeating itself.  Especially in the hooves of petite, pink-haired pipsqueaks.”  Rainbow Dash takes a deep breath.  “Okay, Twi—I'm good here....I guess.  Thanks for the light and all.”
“Anytime!  But just one last thing--”  Twilight trots over and nudges the windows open with two hooves.  A gentle cool breeze wafts into the tiny room, infecting the lofty study with the purplish haze of tranquil night.  “I find that the fresh evening air is not only relaxing, but a great service to one's muse.”
“But what if I don't muse so much as I misuse?”
“The key is that you relax, Rainbow Dash.  And write from the heart—or the gut—whatever pleases you most.”  Twilight bows out, smiling.  “I'll be downstairs if you need anything.”
“How about a bottle of tap dancing explosions?”
“What?”
“Nothing.  I'm good!”
“Heheh—Okai....”  Twilight Sparkle makes to trot out of the room.  Her quadrapedal form lingers briefly, and she glances back—her horn a humble silhouette in the dozy lantern light.  “And Rainbow....?”
“Yeah, Twi?  What is it?”
“Thank you....Thank you so very much for this...”
Rainbow Dash raises an eyebrow.  She looks curiously back from where she squats before the podium.
Twilight's smile is like the edge of a New Moon, brightening:  “What you're writing, what you've done, and who you are—it's all very important to me, and to the rest of us girls.  For....For a while there, I sometimes feared that you were tempted to leave our little circle of friends.  But then—I dunno—something changed, and you're still here.  I don't mean to say that I ever once doubted your loyalty, Rainbow Dash.  But I feel like I've sometimes underestimated—well—just how happy you really have been.  And for that, I-I am sorry....”
“It's........ ..... ...” Rainbow Dash shifts nervously, smiling with no less awkwardness.  “It's quite alright, Twilight.  D-Don't be such a nerd about....er....the sweet stuff...”
“Eheh....of c-course...” Twilight blushes slightly.  Smiling, she backs out of the room and nods.  “I'll let you write now, Rainbow Dash.  Good luck.”
The blue Pegasus nods.  Twilight exits, and the pen-equipped speedster is alone.  But the seconds tick into minutes, and she finds herself simply sitting there, gazing blankly out the open window of the loft study.  The sudden abyss of unassuming downtown Ponyville stares back, and Rainbow Dash becomes suddenly aware of how thick her pulse is underneath her skin.  The parchment lies out on the podium before her, but she does not write.
She stands up and turns around, trotting out the study and descending slowly down the winding stairway.  Halfway to the first floor, she pauses, and gazes quietly at the scene.  From above, Rainbow Dash sees Twilight Sparkle, sees her nonchalantly rearranging old photos on the shelf of her family in Canterlot, hears her humming a pleasant tune to herself, spots a distant smile on the Unicorn's lips—when the violet pony doesn't expect anyone to be noticing.  After the space of half a minute, Rainbow Dash quietly trots back up.  She returns to the study, approaches the podium, and raises her metal-braced pen with a slow and meditative breath:








 “Princess Celestia, I would like to finish this letter by telling you about somepony whom you don't know—Somepony named Twilight Sparkle.
“You may know a certain star pupil of yours who is an expert at Canterlotlian magical arts.  You may be familiar with Ponyville's newest denizen and lead librarian.  You've undoubtedly read many of the letters that a certain purple colored unicorn has written to you about many of her friends and all of the complicated-yet-simple things she learns about being a good, healthy member of Equestrian society.  But I have to ask—and do forgive me for my boldness or rudeness or Pegasus grit or whatever—Do you truly, truly know Twilight Sparkle?
“Well, I do.  She's a nerd.  She's a bookworm.  She's a stiff neck at a rock concert, a tangled-hoof at a dance party.  She needs a manual to have sleepovers, she needs a written tutorial to speak out loud to a handsome colt passing by.  There are none who are more boring, more absent-minded, more ridiculously wordy, or more obsessive compulsive than her.
“But in spite of all that crazy fluff—Twilight Sparkle is still my friend.  And she's not my friend because she's some freakjob of fate and circumstance.  She's not my friend because the Elements of Harmony said so.  She's not even my friend because some crazy lucky Sonic Rainboom performed by yours truly made her get her act together at age seven.
“Twilight Sparkle is my friend because she gives me hope.  She proves to me that I'm cooler than most ponies, and yet she reminds me that there are many ponies to whom I owe my apologies.  She makes me realize that I can do awesome things, and yet I'm very capable of doing really cruddy things.  She's like an emotionally sensitive litmus test of all the good things and bad things I am, reflected back at me in her curious and almost foal-like eyes.  But why does all of this give me hope?  It's because in spite of all of her shortcomings and all of my shortcomings, when I'm in the presence of Twilight Sparkle, I can somehow expect that life in Equestria will only get better.  There's something infectious about being a friend to somepony who is just now discovering what friendship is.  You realize that you are a part of something important, just as you are an important part in her life—As you see her smile when you enter the room or you see her cringe when you do something stupid or you see her flare up when you do something even stupider.
“Twilight Sparkle reminds me that things can begin anew.  Here's a girl who rose from zero-to-hero in terms of popularity; a total shut-in at Canterlot became a galloping social hub in Ponyville.  And did she do it by being a jerk?  Did she get so many friends by being a total flake and buying all of our attention?  Did she waltz in, demand the spotlight, and make us all feel like pawns in her magical crusade of enchanted Unicorning?  Heck no—on all counts.  But rather—Twilight was honest, she was kind, she was generous and laughable and loyal—all of the things that define the rest of us, she embodies just by being herself.  And as she needed friends to remind her what it meant to be alive, we needed just one life to teach us what it meant to be friends.
“Just a few pathetic months ago, I would not even think of saying any of this out loud—much less in a written letter to the Princess of Equestria.  Call this what you want—a moment of clarity, a sappy tug of the heartstrings, a bad case of equine indigestion; but I think I get it all now.  Loyalty means more than just being around someone; it means giving them the grace to be around you.  I could have flown away from Twilight's fresh little 'circle' here in Ponyville flippin' eons ago; could have bucked her off my back like a blood sucking tick.  But, for whatever reason, I haven't.  And it's not like I planned it all out from the start—But I think Twilight is actually a happier pony today because I stuck around for longer than it took us to gather some boring rocks to fight back Nightmare Moon.  She didn't just need a friend for a day—she needed a friend to get used to, to squeeze into the cubbyhole beside and wriggle her hooves with, so to speak.
“Being around Twilight Sparkle is very inspiring, because everything is a new discovery for her.  And everything she writes to you is tasty and amazing because it really is all so 'fresh'.  But, as much as I hate to say it, the day you find out for yourself who Twilight Sparkle is—the day you learn what lies beneath the violet coat of your apt pupil—is not when she learns something new about a friend, but shen she loses that friend herself.  But, because I know who Twilight Sparkle is, because I've seen her laugh and I've seen her cry, because for some silly reason I see her in my head whenever I'm doing something nice or doing something stupid—I feel almost a supernatural tug to do all that is in my power to keep her from losing that friend, to keep her from losing me, as I have failed so many times in the past—with all faults solely my own—to keep myself from splitting with those who used to be my 'friends'.  I don't want Twilight to experience that—not yet.  She's best if she stays Twilight, not so much if she becomes Rainbow Dash.
“Maybe this is the real reason why I've been forced at hoof-point to make this letter to you, Princess Celestia.  It's not to get you to know more about me—the most awesome Pegasus in all of Cloudsdale.  It's not to explain to you how important that first Sonic Rainboom was.  It's all about Twilight Sparkle—somehow everything comes full circle to her.  I suppose it's fitting; she was the one who asked me to write this drivel to begin with.  And, for better or for worse, it's hopefully done something that I didn't originally intend, but is kinda kewl anyways.  This letter has told you about somepony named Twilight Sparkle—a pony who admires you far too much than she could ever stammer forth in your presence, a pony who wants what's best for everyone around her, a pony whom I can't quit—who's put this dang annoying thing in my gut called a conscience.
“She's a pony who, if I have anything to do about it, won't learn the bitter truth about friendship—that it can end, like all things end.  I don't think Twilight can live securely in the beat of the moment like I can—it's still not too late for her, don't you see?
“And so I end this letter, feeling like my hoof is gonna frickin' fall off, but even more so feeling like I've said way too much than I really wanted to and it was all thrushed upon my flank like a branding iron.  But hey—anything for Twi.  That's what we call her around Ponyville, by the way:  'Twi'.  When you live down here among the peasants of Ponyville, Princess, and your name is really just a souped up jumbilation of a common noun or two—You do wyrd things to get creative.  Twi doesn't like being called 'Twi' so much, but Twi can handle what we dish out to Twi—because Twi likes it so much.  Ew, that sounded kinky.
“I don't know if I'm going to have to edit this thing or hoofread it or what.  I tried going back a few pages and reading it myself but it put me to sleep.  And I really can't expect you to respond or whatnot—You being busy with, oh I dunno, the mother flippin' Sun and all.  I suppose I might bump into you—er—prance up gracefully and bow before you at the Grand Galloping Gala next month.  Or—heck—even better!  The A.W.A.—The Annual Wonderbolts Airshow is in Canterlot the week after next!  Speaking of Twi being all swell and 'TWI'—She bought two tickets to the Airshow.  Assuming she's pleased with this letter, she's likely to give yours truly a front row seat alongside her!  Yeah, I know, that may seem like a bizarre example of exploitation on behalf of your star pupil—But what's it matter?  Any chance I get to see the Wonderbolts perform in pony is worth dying for!  If nothing else, then just to see Soarin do his triple-barrel-roll over spewing fireworks, or Swiftwing do his quadruple sonic aircanterblast, or Spitfire do her spine twirling gravity death plunge, or Shattersky's smoke trailing cloud hop, or Shredfeather and Slamstar the Cloudsdalian twins performing their double zig-zagging pyrotechnic cloudswe—CRACKKKKKK!








Rainbow Dash blinks, her eyes wide.  Before her—at the end of viciously chickenscratching the last exciting paragraph, the metal brace of Scootaloo's design has snapped into brittle brass shards.  The pen has fallen down and rolled onto the floor; the letter, in all of its dramatic length and sincerity, remains unfinished.
“...... .... .... ...well, shoot.”  Rainbow Dash's violet eyes twitch.  She picks up the shattered bits of the metal brace and raises them to a squinting inspection.  “Hmmmm... .... ...nnnnghh—Freakin' pipsqueak.  Last time you buy parts from Mexicolt, I swear to Alicornia.”
A sigh.  Rainbow Dash scoots back and bends down under the table, searching with hooves and wingtips for the runaway pen.
“Where in the heck did you go?  When I find you, I'm gonna hunt down your entire family and fill their inkwells with graphite.”  Thud!  “Owie!  Dang podium—Twilight's cozy study is gonna coze my blood to a boil.  Where are we--?”
Suddenly, a swift gust of wind barrels through the window of the room.
“--ahHA!  There you are, ya little ceiling tile piercing!  Finally, now to--”  Rainbow Dash sits back up in front of the podium with the pen.  She freezes.  “... .... ...”
Every sheet of paper is gone.
“.... ... ....”  Rainbow Dash blinks.  She gulps.  She stands up, tilting her head and shakily glancing out the window....
Below, in the night-drenched shadows of the Ponyville road, eight sheets of parchment can be seen fluttering in a gaggle of paper chaos.  Before the Pegasus' horrified eyes, they roll directly into a thick puddle of brown mud.  After two and a half seconds of bitter soiling, an old workhorse clops absent-mindedly across the street, thundering his elderly hooves savagely over the soiled sheets, followed by two of his splintery sharp wagon wheels.  Another burst of wind, and four of the wet sheets shred themselves into a hundred soggy pieces—ambling on into the night.  Half a spastic eye twitch later, a shadowed creature patters out from the nearby bushes, gathers three soiled sheets in its racoon claws, nibbles a sizeable chunk of them into mush, and hurriedly carries the remaining bits off into the wilderness beyond Ponyville.  The very last page lingers for a few absurd seconds...before spontaneously bursting into flames—Well, not quite.  But why not?
“Y-Yeah, why not...?”  Rainbow Dash dryly gulps, her hair a sudden sweaty mat of color palettes drooping defeatedly around her ghostly pale face.  “Uhhhhh.....?”
“How's the letter coming, Rainbow Dash?”  Twilight sing-songs from downstairs.  “It's almost eight o'clock.  I'm sorry I forgot to mention it earlier, but I-I kind of need to make a last minute delivery someplace soon....”
“Uhmmmmmm....”  Rainbow Dash bites her lip, sweating bullets.  “Fuuuuuu--”
“Rainbow Dash?  Is everything alright up there?”
“Uhhhh—No—YES!  Um--”  She flashes her head towards the doorway to the study.  “Everything is---er---Fine and dandy!  Easy breezey!  I—Uh....”
“Need me to come up there and help you with something?”  Cloppity-clop-clop noises, approaching...
“No!  Er—I mean yes—But you don't need to come in here!  Your voice sounds really killer awesome from the acoustics of the hallway—outside the room.  Not inside.  Outside.  Er—Tell me, Twilight—Uh....H-How do you spell Deeyuss Exmakeena?”
“'Deus Ex Machina'?  Why, that's simple!  'D-E-U---'”
Rainbow Dash mounts the podium, bites her lip, flashes one look over her shoulder, two, three—flexes her wings—and zooms straight out the window in a blue blur.









Swoosh!  Rainbow Dash lands in front of the mud puddle in the middle of the street.  Wincing, she plops a hoof into the soggy body of water and digs for the last remaining shred of written parchment.  “Come on come on come on—Please at least be a page where I didn't write upside down or use ellipses like a transmitted disease!”  She hisses, fishes around, and finally yanks the soiled clump of dangling tissue out.  “Ah-HA!”  Half a breath, and the things dissolves in her grasp like hourglass dust into the Ponyvillean night air.  “Nnngh--!”  She pounds her hooves into the splashing puddle.  “Hraaaaaaughhh!  Equianu Reeves on a bench!  I swear to gawd—they named me 'Dash' cuz that's what happens to all my friggin' luck!”
She takes a deep breath, glances behind her at the lights glowing from Twilight Sparkle's house.  A sore-throated gulp, and she starts glancing and trotting and flapping and prancing around the center courtyard of Ponyville, murmuring and gasping to her frazzled self.
“Okay.  Okay.  Okayokayokay.  Just stay calm.  All I need to do is...is f-find some paper and rewrite all twelve hours of work in twenty seconds and I won't have to see Twilight Sparkle's disappointed face for the umpteenth time since it's first ever been burned into my Celestia-forsaken retinae!”  She glances under a rock.  “Paper?”  She fumbles through a trash bin.  “Yoohoo, paper?”  She fingers and bats at a bush full of leaves.  “Hey, are you paper?”  She nibbles on a few dry leaves, makes a face, and vomits them out.  “Bleachk—Okay....maybe if I just....uhhh......settled for leather instead.”  A shuddering, eye-twitching glance across the lengths and breadths of the lantern-lit townscape.  “Now—Just who can I skin alive that nopony's gonna miss?”
A sideways beating of wings from above.  “Good evening to you, Mister Squirrel!”
Rainbow Dash glances up—her violet eyes widen.  “D-Ditzy!”
“That's my name!”  The gray-coated Pegasus smiles, fluttering down to the Earth and walking up to a house while fumbling for keys from the mail satchel hanging over her shoulder.  “Though I much rather prefer  my birth title, 'Anastasia'....”
“You're—Uh—You're....d-delivering mail this late?”  Rainbow Dash sneaks up behind her, sweatily burning a hole through her skin with two psychotic eyes.  They briefly blink to normal as she mutters aside to herself:  “Nah.  No way in heck that gray flesh would absorb the ink...”
“What was that, Mister Squirrel?”
“N-Nothing!  Wh-What brings you to Ponyville?”
“Heheh—This is where I live, silly!”  Ditzy grins Rainbow's way, or at least she tries to.  Her eyes have minds of their own and their minds take them in opposite directions from the Blue Pegasus.  “After a long day of delivering postage, there's nothing I love more than returning home to my baby girl—Except maybe returning home with a check from the Ex.”
“You have a d-daughter?”
“Yupperooni!”  Ditzy blinks and taps her chin.  “Sometimes, when I tilt my head forty-five degrees, I have two of 'em!  Thankfully, they only have one hungry mouth between them.  Well, nice talking to you!  Wherever you are.”
“Uhhhhh--” Rainbow Dash glances back over her shoulder at Twilight's house, cringes, nearly pops an artery in her skull, and finally spins back—pointing a hoof straight skyward.  “Omigosh—Look!  A red herring!”
“Where?!”  Ditzy turns to look up, gasping.
Rainbow holds her breath, stretches, leans, and snakes a hoof into Ditzy's satchel.  She yanks out the first paper scroll she can find.  “Frickin' score...!”
“Mister Squirrel, I'm looking and I'm looking but I don't see any red herring!”
“That's okay, Ditzy!  It's been my experience that most ponies never do!”  Rainbow Dash takes off with a mighty swish of her wings.  “You'vebeenalotofhelpKaythanksbye!”  SWOOSH!
Ditzy scratches her skull.  “That squirrel gets sillier and sillier.  Oh well.”  She opens the door to her house and trots in, smiling.  “Darling, Mommy's home!  H-Hey, arlight!  I've got twins again!”









Zoop!  Rainbow Dash leaps in through the double windows, closes them, and slumps down—panting--before the podium.  As the lanterns rock and shake above her, she clamors through the wavering light to grasp her barely ink-filled pen.
Twilight is still going on in the hallway:  “--but 'Deus Ex Machina' was also a term that referred to a common setpiece in Third Age Flankspearean plays when they needed to suspend a 'ghostly supernatural' character from beneath the stage to above the crowd in an old fashioned simulation of levitation.  You see, Pegasi were never known for their prowess on stage and it was up to artistic Earth Ponies to come up with their own effects--”
“Yeah!  Sounds really awesome Twi!  Thanks!  You can shut up now—Uhm—BFF, sweetie!  Thankiessss.”  Rainbow Dash sweatily grins.  “Eheheheh--”  She all but slams her upper body down point blanc against the pilfered parchment that she's now unfurling across the podium.  Her violet eyes briefly register a colorful advertisement of several edible foodstuffs—all of which disappear in a blink as she slaps the unrolled scroll to its other side and shakily sticks a pen to the top of it in a panicked attempt at starting a paragraph.  “OhgoshOhgoshOhgosh—What the heck do I write?  Think—Dang it!  Think like you've never thought before--”  She goes crosseyed.  “Crud, but then that would be a first!”
“Rainbow Dash--?”
“Just one last secondddd!”  Rainbow Dash all but hyperventilates, wrestling with the pen and paper.  “Uhh......uhm....let's see....uhh....”  She chicken-scratches:






   “Dear Celestia the Princess how's it hoofin'?  Sonic Boomrain and friendship is the Awesome and Apple Jack smells like hay - I kick clouds while Rarity is a generous vampire who likes Pinkie Pie and I like Pinkie Pie but we all like Twilight Sparkle the most including me except I like winning even moresoest and friendship is totally awesome and those who don't agree should probably just kill themselves unless you accidentally drop the Sun into the Earth and then we'd all have nothing to worry about and I forgot the purple dragon's stupid name and what else what else Oh Yes Fluttershy is my best fri--”










Twilight Sparkle walks in.  “Everything cool?”
CLAP!  Rainbow Dash leans a suave elbow on a haphazardly rolled up, slightly bent-out-of-shape scroll on the podium.  She grins at the violet Unicorn, her multi-colored hair settling as if suddenly recovering from a forty-five mile plunge through the stratosphere.  “When have I ever—ever been coolor than I am right this very dang second?  Huh?  Huh?”
“... .... ...” Twilight blinks.  “O-Kaaaaaaaaaaay....”  A nervous side-giggle.  “I-I-I didn't mean to interrupt your letter to the princess.  I just--”
“Letter to the PRINCESS!!”  Rainbow Dash slaps her knee with a hoof.  “HA-HA-HA—Owwww--”  She rubs her knee, wincing, then clears her throat.  “Ahem—Oh yeah we totally baked that cake and ate it!  Totally finished!  Everything you ever asked of me totally completed as to your heart's desire—And--Uhm--The Princess' desire too, totally—Cuz she also has a heart, and hopefully a pair of eyes to read with and then tell what the letter is saying to that heart.....from my gut... ... ...my gut to the Princess' heart.  Yup.  Ahem.”  Rainbow Dash stares, stares, stares, and smiles wide, eyebrow twitching.
“.... ...... ...Well...at least you...erm....Enjoyed y-yourself?” Twilight nervously scrapes at the floor with a random hoof in front of her.
“Pffft—Do you wear a pink diaper?”
Twilight giggles.  “Well, if you're sure that you're done—I could do you the favor of relieving the letter from your hooves, Rainbow Dash.  I know you're a girl who likes her freedom in the sky, and I'm sorry for having bogged you down so much with the last second request to write to Princess Celestia.”
“Oh....Oh ho ho ho ho ho....Eheheh...”  Rainbow Dash chuckles nervously, motioning a hoof boredly into the air while still leaning against the scroll.  “Bog me down?  Me?  Rainbow Dash--?”
“So you'll let me deliver the letter, then?”  Twilight Dash reaches a hoof forward.
“NO!--”  Rainbow blurts, gasps, cringes, clears her throat, then stammers:  “Er, what I mean is—Are you sure?  Maybe I could just.....ehhh... .... ....H-Hang onto it a little bit.  Maybe....Uhm....P-Perfume it?”
Twilight raises an eyebrow.  “Perfume it?  You?”
“Do you have any idea how much the sky smells?  For real!  I-I-I can't blame a Unicorn for being ignorant of the clouds' fragrance and all, but—seriously—You ever ever wonder where all the farts in Equestria go?  It ain't a pretty scene.  And it'd be a shame for....for....”  Rainbow Dash lingers, biting her lip.
For Twilight Sparkle is trying her best to smile in understanding, but the corner of her mouth is twitching.  A sadness deeply shimmers from behind her strong pair of eyes, attempting to hold firm a dam of confidence against a great deluge of anxiety and confusion.  She kneads the ground with the front hoof, her tail flicking in an identically absent-minded telegram of her potentially shot down dreams.
“.... ... .... ...” Rainbow Dash takes a deep breath—a great muted groan that flounders through the hollow depths of her being—and she relents with a grunting voice:  “Eh, yanno--?  The Princess probably has guards who spritz all her letters with Cloven Clein before it gets to her.”  And before she knows it, Rainbow Dash is handing the hastily bound scroll over to--
“Heeeee—Thank you, Rainbow Dash!”  Twilight beams, telekinetically floating the 'letter' towards herself.  “You have no idea what this means to me!”
Rainbow Dash blinks at her own empty hoof, then at Twilight.  A vicious sweatdrop creeps a snail's path down her left temple as she crookedly grins:  “Right.  What's the worst that could happen?”
Twilight Sparkle trots gaily out the study and down the winding steps.  “I'll be sure to send this to Princess Celestia right away!”
“Uhmm—Tw-Tw-Twi!  Are you...er....”  Rainbow Dash hovers after her towards the first floor of the library.  “Are y-you really sure that you wanna send that thing in the morning?”
“In the morning?”  Twilight giggles.  “Don't be so silly!  I'd never do that....!”
“Whew....” Rainbow Dash exhales and murmurs to herself.  “I may still have time--”
“The morning is when Princess Celestia raises the Sun!”  Twilight steps into the main room of the library, smiling.  “I'm sending this to her now!  Spiiiike!”
“Nnghkkkt--!”  Rainbow Dash pops a blood vessel.  “N-N-N-Now?”
“I don't have a purple baby dragon for nothing, you know.”  Twilight slyly winks.
ZIIIP!  “You called, Twilight?”  The drake-lite in question salutes.
“OhhorseapplesOhhorseapples...”  Rainbow Dash nibbles on the ends of her hooves.
“Rainbow Dash is done with her letter.”  Twilight Sparkle regails him with an elegant upturn of the chin.  She drops the scroll telekinetically into his grasp.  “Send this to Princess Celestia—At once.”
“Unnngh—Twilight....!”  The whelp slumps, slothily shrugging his shoulders.  “You know I can't teleport letters this late at night....!”
“Whew....”  Rainbow Dash breathes.
“....not without eating a few gems first!”
“Hckkk--!”  Rainbow twitches again.
“Fine, whatever, Spike!  Just get 'er done.  And...Uhm...” Twilight briefly blushes.  “Is it--”
“Eight o'clock?”  He frowns up at his 'boss' and points at an invisible watch on his scaled wrist.  “Ten minutesssss ago!  Did I tell you, or did I--?”  He glances Rainbow Dash's way.  He chuckles nervously.  “Eheheh—-Sendingtheletternow.”  He dashes off to the side.  Rainbow Dash blinks, looking at him as he saunters over to a basket full of gyms and starts hungrily scarfing a few of the multicolored rocks down his tiny razor-sharp maw.
All the while, Twilight Sparkle paces back over to the Pegasus' side, murmuring about one thing or another:  “Like I said earlier, Rainbow Dash, I gotta make a last second delivery to Town Hall. I know that you've done so much for me today with writing that letter, and I hate to be a bother—But I was wondering if you could be so kind as to help me with the delivery?  It's just a brisk trot across town, and barely a trip's worth of books—But you being here would make it so much easier, and the Mayor would be indebted as well to have these research materials.  So, whaddya say?... ....Rainbow Dash?”
“.... .. ...” The Pegasus stares, gradually pailing with each icy second as she watches the purple whelp down one gem, two, three—then finally lurch as a belch rises up from his system.  The baby dragon opens his mouth wide, and with a resounding buuuuuuuuurrrrrp—He lets loose a plume of esophagus-kindled flames that envelopes the battered scrolled and magically teleports it to Canterlot.  (“Ah.  Yeah—There we go.”)
“Rainbow...?”  Twilight's face leans close up in frame.  “You there?”
“GAH!--Uh....Uh....”  Rainbow Dash blinks, blinks, smiles.  “Books?  You want me to carry your books?  Sure thing!  Anything for y-you, Twilight—You totally awesome friend whom I would never want to disappoint in any way ever!”
“Hmm-Hmmm-Hmmm....”  Twilight chuckles breathily.  “Very well, then!  Let's go, shall we?”  She trots to the other side of the room, gathering a few things.  “Spike!  We're (cough cough) heading to the (cough cough) Town Hall!”
“Right-o-Roonie, Twilight!” (Buuurp!)
“Spike!  One gem per letter!  We talked about this!”
“I must have been measuring that in the Mexicolt exchange rate!”
“Hey, those gems look delicious.”  Rainbow Dash drones.  “Mind if I have one?”
“Heeheehee—Dashie, you silly Pegasus!  Only dragons like me can eat them!  You would only choke to death!”
“Y-Yeah....”  Rainbow Dash gulps.  “So—Are you gonna pass me one, or....?”








Rainbow Dash steps out of the library and into the night-laden street of Ponyville.  She takes a deep breath, her wings flexing in and out, as Twilight trots up alongside her.
“Mmmm—What a beautiful evening.  I almost wish I had known about Ponyville much sooner.  If so, I would have moved out of Canterlot years ago.”
“Right.  Just watch out for the puddles.”
“Shall we....?”
“Shall we what?”
“Make the delivery to Town Hall, silly--”
“Aren't we missing something?”
Twilight blinks.  “H-Huh?”
Rainbow Dash smirks slyly at her.  “The books, Twi.”  She gestures her snout towards the barren backsides of both fillies.  “If I understood things right, you and I (cough cough) were heading to the (cough cough) Town Hall to deliver (cough cough) books.”
“Oh....Oh y-yeah....but of course...”  Twilight blushes a deeper shade of violet.  “S-Silly me....”  She backtrots slowly into the building that happens to be her house.  “Here I go....g-getting the books!  Eh heh heh...”
“Try not to marry one while you're at it!”  Rainbow Dash says.  She stands by herself in the cold tranquility of cricket-cadence.  A moth buzzes around a lantern hung overhead.  A deep breath; she tilts her colorful mane starward, and exhales long and hard—Followed suddenly by a cryptic:  “Five... ...Four.... ...Three... ....Two... ...One--”
“Hiya, Rainbow Dash!”  A pink haired Pegasus-diet pops out from behind a park bench.
“Wow.  Scootaloo.”  Rainbow Dash stonily smirks down at her, droning:  “What a surprise.”
“Jee, Rainbow Dash...”  Scootaloo hunches under a streetlamp, frowning slightly.  “Does anything get past your radar?”
“I'll have you know that my Eighth Sense allows me to know where all wayward young Pegasi are at anyday, anytime.”  Rainbow says.  A blink.  “Actually, I take that back—That's my Sixth Sense.  My Eighth Sense is Kickbuttery.”
“Really?”  Scootaloo blinks widely.  “What's your Seventh?”
“... ... ... ... ... ...Popcorn.”
“Heeheehee!  Anywho--”  Scootaloo beams, rummaging through a satchel being unshouldered from her tiny self.  “--I've been looking for you all afternoon since you left the Carousel Boutique--”
“Now there's a shocker.”
“Hush!”  Scootaloo half raspberries up at her, still fiddling with the contents of the satchel.  “I just finished working on something that I thought I could wear myself—but I realized I made them too big.  So I figured they'd be perfect for an awesome grown Pegasus like you!”
“I smell a really funny joke coming, but somehow I don't think the HUB would allow it...”
“I know it's here somewhere....” Scootaloo angrily hisses at herself as she all but dives into the bag.
Rainbow Dash suddenly squints at her.  “Hey, Pipsqueak.  Did you know that you're—uh—like totally covered in greease and crud?”
Surely enough, in the glow of the lantern light overhead, several smudges can be seen dotting random specks of flesh across Scootaloo's face, neck, and flank; the tell-tale sign of many an hour invested at a workbench.  “I toldja—Didn't I?  I just finished working on--”
“--your puberty?”  Rainbow Dash gasps.  “And all it took was some tweezers and duct tape?”
“Taa-daaa!”  Scootaloo raises a dried-up apple core.  Her eyes bulge.  “Whoops—That ain't it.”
“If I had patience, kid, it'd be worn anorexic by now.”
“Found 'em!”  Scootaloo grins up at the Blue Pegasus, grinning devilishly.  “Close your eyesssssss.”
“Ugh—Must we have all this pageantry?”
“Pretty pleeeeeease?”  Scootaloo does a puppy dog face.  “And hold your arms out!  I promise you're gonna love them!”
“Fine—FINE!”  Rainbow Dash sighs, rolls her eyes back into their sockets, and closes them with her head tilted up.  She stretches her arms forward like an equine zombie.  “I swear, though—If you dip my hooves into a bowl of slugs or some-crap, I'm gonna give you a thermonuclear wedgie the likes of which will be told in legend throughout Equestria for the next Three Ages to come.”
“Hehehe—But I'm not wearing any pants!”
“Who said I wouldn't be using your skin?”
“Ahem--”  Scootaloo's voice scrapes from beyond the opaque veil of Rainbow's eyelids.  “Okaaaaay....and....”  A light, leathery article is draped across the blue Pegasus' hooves.  “....open 'em!”
“Hrmmm...”  Rainbow makes a curious face even before she complies.  When her violets open, they blink and narrow as her face falls halfway between curious and quizzical.  In her grasp there lies a pair of leather-reinforced flight goggles.  Brass cylinders with finely drilled rivets frame a pair of crystal-clear lenses that frame either side of a snout-piece.  On the sides of either lens-cylinder are tiny adjustable knobs at varying degrees of depth between the furthestmost lens glass and the position of the invisible wearer's skull.  “Hey, whaddya know?  Super-peepers!”
“Inorite!”  Scootaloo beams, hopping in place with twitching wings.  “Like I said—I originally wanted to make them for myself, but they only slide off my face.”
“When did you get the bright idea of making flight goggles?  I thought most bugs had the better sense of flying out of the path of your rampaging scooter.”
“I.....Er.....”  Scootaloo bites her lip and blushes slightly.  “I-I kinda sorta got the idea shortly after the Parasprites attacked our town--”
“--and you saw me wearing my goggles.”  Rainbow Dash nods.  “How cute.”
“Whatever happened to those glasses anyway?”
“They aren't glasses.”  Rainbow half-hisses, sticking her nose up.  “They're for eye protection—Not for eye sight.  I was flying through a tornado of tiny village-devouring insects.  It's a miracle they lasted for more than ten seconds, or my flesh for that matter!”
“So you do need a replacement!”  Scootaloo eagerly suggests.
“Well—I don't exactly plan to run into parasprites again anytime soon.”  She adds with a mutter:  “Not without a flame thrower, at least--”
“But Rainbow!  They can be used for so much more than just bug wrangling!  Check it!”  Scootaloo grunts, struggles, and flaps her tiny wings so she hovers in place in front of the Blue Pegasus.  From there, she reaches in and taps various buttons and sliders on the side of the goggles' lens-cylinders, revealing a series of intricate glasses-within-glasses that swivel in and out of place at command.  “If you're doing an early morning weather flight and need to find a wayward cloud—This can let you magnify your vision and see from a far distance!  And this will dim the skies for when there's a bright reflection from the Sun!  And this--”
“I get it—I get it, Scoots.  They're Super Goggles—A definite improvement from my not-so-super bug goggles.”  She chuckles with a smirk.  “I like.”
“You like?  Or you like-like?”
“Please, don't make me choose.  Monogamy is a lie imposed upon us by the patriarchy—Wait, this is Equestria.  What the heck am I saying?  Snkkt—heheheh—Ohhhhh I'm exhausted....”
“Th-They're yours if you want 'em!”  Scootaloo chirps cheerfully, touching back down to the ground.  “Pleeeeease!  At least use them once when you're cloud kicking!  That's all I ask!”
“Yeah, yeah—We'll see....They are pretty snazzy, though....”  Rainbow Dash turns them over a few more times in her hooves.  “I totally dig the multiple lenses thang.  And the rivets; totally steampony.”  She makes a slight face.  “But.....hmmm....I dunno...”
“Wh-What?”  Scootaloo blinks.
“Eh—They certainly are very useful looking—But I guess they could stand to look....mmm...a little cooler?”
“Oh...Ohh.....”  Scootaloo sheepishly bows her head and picks at the ground with a wayward hoof.  “L-Like how much cooler?”
“Well, I'd say about--”  Rainbow Dash opens her mouth, but stops to gaze down at the partially-wilted image of the pink-haired filly.  She clears her throat.  “Scratch that.  They're A-okay in my Encyclopedia of Cool!”
“R-Really?  Yaaaay!”  Scootaloo bubbles from inside.
“Yuppers, definitely coolest of the cool.”  Rainbow Dash stretches the straps out, slaps it over her skull, and fixes the goggles onto her face.  Slightly bug-eyed, she smirks dashingly down at Scootaloo and holds her hoof straight out.  “..........”
“.... .... ...?” Scootaloo stares quizzocally at the outstretched hoof.
“.... ... ....”  Rainbow's lensed violet eyes blink down at her.  “Just pretend I'm Twilight Sparkle's dragon sidekick giving a thumb's up.”
“Oh.  Heheh—Gotcha.  Awesome.”  Scootaloo grins a crescent moon.  A giggle is shared between the two, and she blinks curiously towards the front of the library.  “S-Say....In speaking of Twilight—wasn't she here, just now, talking to you?”
“Yeah, she went back to grab some books for us to take to the Town Hall.”
“Yeah?  How long is that gonna take?”
“You're asking me?  I'd say just about long enough for us to finish this conversation--”
“I'm back!”
“Speak of the nerd!  Welcome back, Twi.”
The violet unicorn comes back with two dozen books, half on her back and half floating in the air via a purple glow.  “Sorry I took so long—Whoah!”  She takes a step back and blinks at the goggle'd expression on Rainbow Dash's face.  “There a hurricane I don't know about?”
“Tropical Storm Scootaloo.”  Rainbow Dash nods and raises her goggles.  “With pre-pubescent tantrums clocked at a constant thirty miles per hour.  Eighty percent chance of idol worship.”
“I'd kick your shins if I understood a single bit of that.”  Scootaloo briefly gripes.
“Please, pipsqueak.  You cannot injure a god.”  Rainbow Dash smirks.  She spreads her wings and straightens her back out for Twilight Sparkle to telekinetically lower the floating mound of books onto her flank.  “Yeesh, Twilight.  Did you save the Mayor's life from a rampaging committee meeting or something?  Since when did she lend you an entire rainforest of paper?”
“Actually....I'm.....erm....l-lending these to her!”  Twilight Sparkle nervously clears her throat.  “Y-Yeah, that's it!  She's been under the weather lately and---Erm....Needs to catch up on her ancient history.”
“Wutever.  That's boring enough; I'll buy it.”
“Need some help with those books?”  Scootaloo asks, flanking the goggle'd Pegasus.  “They look awfully heavy.”
“I may be many things, kiddo.  But child slave laborer ain't one of them.”  Rainbow Dash winks.  “Why don't you soar on home, it's getting late--”
“You're welcome to join us, my little pony!”  Twilight smirks the filly's way.  “The more company the better!”
“Yaaay!  I promise I won't get in the way!”
“... .... ....” Rainbow Dash blinks.  “Well then, I stand corrected.  Bow-legged, but corrected.  Let's get this over with, Twilight.”
“I can't thank you enough, Rainbow Dash.”  Twilight stifles a giggle to herself and trots at a brisk pace across Ponyville.  “Let's hurry.”
“Hurry?  Hurry for what?”  Scootaloo blinks.
A whispering sound.  Scootaloo glances at Rainbow.  Rainbow darts her eyes over Twilight's shoulder and winks knowingly at Scootaloo.  The young filly is twice as confused as she is unamused.  Nevertheless, she follows the two as they move across town, the stars in the sky failing to outrun them.
Several flickering lamplights later, Twilight is in the middle of rambling on about some astronomical dissertation or another—with Rainbow Dash trying to keep her eyes open.  The blue Pegasus glances aside and sees Scootaloo fidgeting in mid-gait, her face hung slightly towards the night-eaten earth.  Raising an eyebrow, Rainbow clears her throat and murmurs Twilight's way.
“Hey, uhm—Twilight?”
“--but if you take into account the sheer number of stars in our galaxy, much less the ones that are experiencing a severe massive implosion, the odds that a Gamma Ray burst would send an energy blast our way is statistically unlikely—at least in any given Age, and especially in anypony's lifetime--”
“Hey stars-for-brains!”
“Hmmm?”  Twilight glances back over her shoulder.  The Town Hall building is in view.  “Did you say something about stars?”
“Sure, why not.  Look—could you go ahead of us?  We'll catch up in a sec...”
Twilight fidgets, her eyes wrestling not to look at the Town Hall building just a few gallops away.  “But...T-Town Hall is.......right there--”
Rainbow Dash's violet eyes harden as she motions her snout emphatically towards Scootaloo.
Twilight mutely exhales 'oh', smiles, and trots on.  “Don't take too long!”
“Would I delay the great exodus of books to the Promised Land?”  The Blue Pegasus slows to a casual stroll, clears her throat, and smirks down at the peach filly beside her.  “What's on your mind, pipsqueak?”
“Hmm?  Oh, me?  Nothing--”
“Come on.  You're not the airhead that the smelly one is.”
“Why does everyone keep saying that Sweetie Bell is--?”
“Seriously.  Let's have it out.  You're down in the saddle about something.  Why else would you spend an entire afternoon hammering together such an awesome pair of goggles for me when you've already given me such a dashing gift earlier in the afternoon.”
“Eheh—You really liked that writing brace, didn't you?”  Scootaloo manages a smile.
“Oh.  Totally.”  Rainbow Dash briefly sweatdrops.  “I....put that thing through the rounds!  Yup.  Sure did!”
“I'm okay, Rainbow Dash.  Just—when you left the Carousel Boutique earlier, you seemed.....I dunno......Y-You seemed kind of sad.”
Rainbow Dash takes a deep breath, her eyes glancing towards the distant purple haze of the EverFree Forest beyond the curtain of night.  “Meh—I probably had something in my eye.”
“I didn't think you were capable of being sad, Rainbow Dash...”
“Seriously, kid?”  Rainbow Dash can't help but let loose a chuckle.  “I mean—That's sweet and all.  But I'm a Pegasus just like you—So I can afford to be anything and everything that other Pegasi are—Except for unawesome.  I could never be that.”
“Heeheehee...”  Scootaloo takes a deep breath.  “I-I admit, I could have waited until later in the week to give you those goggles...”
“And they are sweet goggles--”
“I mean it, Rainbow Dash.  Just—Today, after you got into a fight with those bullies... ...well... ...I-I heard more than I let on about...”
“Oh, this should be nifty.”  Rainbow Dash drones.  She glances down.  “Wanna fill me in?”
“They... ...They called you names.”
“So does everyone whom I butt heads with.”  Rainbow Dash briefly goes cross-eyed.  “And come to think of it—That's a lot of ponies.  Heh.”
“Th-They called you 'half-wing', Rainbow Dash.”
The Blue Pegasus stops in her hooves.  Dead still.
Scootaloo immediately winces regretfully.  She clears her throat:  “I-I've never heard that before.  And I-I can't pretend to understand it, but it sounds really.....really mean.  'I can't believe the nerve of that half-wing'--That's what I heard Hoops saying to his younger brother, just before they fixed a plan to challenge you to a race out at Cloven Canyon.”
“Scootaloo, don't you ever think that your cutie mark might end up being a hidden camera and a microphone?”
“How did that race at the Canyon go, Rainbow?  Huh?  Huh?”  She suddenly jumps, giddy.  “Didja whoop their butts?”
“One thing at a time, kiddo.”  Rainbow Dash turns around, faces Scootaloo, and squats down in front of her—balancing the books precariously on her flank.  “I want you to be straight with me.  After you heard that phrase, did you use it on anyone?”
“What?”  Scootaloo blinks.  “'Half-wing'?”
“Did you use it?”  Rainbow's violet eyes narrow like daggers.  “Tell me.”
Scootaloo shrinks back from the sudden seriousness in her beloved idol's voice.  “N-No!  I didn't!  P-Pinkie Pie swear...!”  She prepares to do the motions--
“No, don't—It's okay...”  Rainbow nudges her with a snout.  Her goggles slide down over her eyes; she lifts them with a hoof and a smirk.  “You're a silly, annoying pipsqueak at times, Scootaloo.  But you ain't a bad kid.  And I'm glad to hear you haven't ever used that term.  Now...”  She leans forward, eye-to-eye with the petite Pegasus.  “I want you to promise me that you're never ever gonna call someone 'half-wing', ever.  Even when you're really really REALLY angry—Which is a hard thing to do, cuz—trust me—I've been known to call people mean things when I get steamed, but never 'half-wing'.  Can you promise me that?”
“Absolutely, Rainbow Dash!”  Scootaloo nods, still slightly wide-eyed.  “I-I promise!  Though, I think it would help if I knew what it meant!”
Rainbow Dash slowly, sadly shakes her head.  “No.  It wouldn't.”  She stands up and resumes trotting towards Twilight Sparkle and the distant Town Hall.  “Even the ponies who use that phrase don't know what it means.  They think they do, but they really don't.  It just comes out of their chompers in a random spurt of anger and stupidity.”  She gazes depressingly into the distance.  “They don't have to live with it; having to live it down, having to prove themselves to everypony that they're not the ones who are missing something important—like decency, or respect, or all that other fluffy jazz.  Meh—It's not worth talking about.”
“Sure..... ...s-sure it is, Rainbow Dash.”  Scootaloo bravely gulps.  “I-I swear I've never seen you so serious about anything before!  You're beginning to sound almost like Twilight Sparkle!”
Rainbow Dash chuckles dryly, confident that her voice isn't heard from the Unicorn waiting from afar.  “Oh, believe me.  This is one serious thing that I have a full grasp of over Twilight.  All the better for her.”
“Have ponies always....erm....c-called you that mean phrase, Rainbow Dash?”
The blue Pegasus takes a deep breath.  She flicks her multicolored tail and grins calmly down at Scootaloo.  “I try not to keep count much, kiddo.”
“Why not?  It's important, isn't it?”
She leans her head down.  “When you're my age, you'll realize that some things aren't worth counting, no matter how many times a day you're made to face it.”
“Pfft—Not one of these speeches!”  Scootaloo half groans.  “You almost sound like my dad.”
Rainbow Dash pales at that, her violet eyes twitching.
“What's the matter, Rainbow?”
“Erm.....Nothing.  Everything is....”  She takes a deep breath, but smiles bravely at the end.  “Everything is awesome.  Wyrdly awesome—But still....”  She snaps out of the brief cloud as she and Scootaloo approach the edge of the Town Hall where Twilight's waiting.  “Tell you what?  How about tomorrow afternoon you and I go flying so we can test out these sweet goggles you made for me?  You can show me allllll the ways I can use them.”
“Really?”  Scootaloo gasps.
“Absolutely, pipsqueak.”
“Why not in the morning?”
“Cuz you're gonna wanna sleep in after tonight.”
“What's happening tonight?”  Scootaloo makes the face.
“There's the million dollar question.”  Rainbow Dash looks Twilight's way.  “Twi?  Care to do the honors?”
Twilight Sparkle immediately shuts the Town Hall door, through which she has been—until now—hushedly hissing something through the cracks.  She plants her left rear hoof against it and chuckles innocently.  “Wh-What are you going on about, Dash?”
“Jee.  Equestria will never know.”  Rainbow Dash once more motions towards the door.  “We're not getting any younger here.  Well, Scootaloo is—But I'm sure we can housebreak her again.”
“H-Hey!”
Twilight Sparkle groans, her cheeks rosy.  Regardless, a belated and exhausted smile:  “Nothing gets past you, does it, Rainbow?”  She proceeds to open the door.
“I don't get it...” Scootaloo blinks up at Rainbow Dash.  “What's she hiding?”
“Scoots, if you ever grow up to write my biography....”  Rainbow Dash leans in and whispers as a suddenly bright light spreads across the three of them.  “....be sure to mention that I'm the only surprise that Equestria ever got—ever.”
Creeeeeak!
“SURPRIIIIIIISE!”  The interior of Town Hall is presently beset with a two-story candle-lit and streamers-swarmed gala event, populated thickly by over four dozen ponies randomly gathered from both Ponyville and Cloudsdale.  Fillies and colts of every color of the spectrum are halo'd around the entrance, cheering wildly the arrival of a certain Sonic Rainboomsterette.  Above a series of tables—replete with almost every delicious baked item in the Sugarcube Corner's catalogue—a grand white banner stretches from balcony to balcony, embroidered with:  'Hooray For Rainbow Dash!'  As the cheering turns into clapping and hoof-stomping, a certain pink Earth Pony cartwheels giddily into view and practically backflips before tossing her arms up with a whooping howl:
“Weeee---Welcome, Rainbow Dash to the SUPER DUPER SECRET MEETING!  And guess what!”  (GASSSSSP)  “We decided to invite you at the last second!  Who'd a thunk et?  So let's hear it for the Saint of Sonic Rainbooms, the Filly of Friendship, the Queen of Cloudsdale—and our bestest of best companions---Raiiiiiiiinbow Dassssssssh!”
Another wave of applause and cheers.
Rainbow Dash blushes slightly, but nevertheless maintains a calm and proud gait as she slowly trots in, the obviously useless books sliding off her back.  Scootaloo gapes beside her, her eyes sparkling.
“A p-party....in honor of y-you, Rainbow....?”  A blink, and her wings suddenly spring ceiling-ward.
Rainbow Dash cooly shoves her wings back to the filly's side.  “Hey—Between Popcorn and Kickbuttery, remember?”  She winks.  “Ahem—How's it Hoofin', everypony?”
“H-Hello, Rainbow Dash....”  Fluttershy suddenly drifts in from the side, her cheeks red.  “I-I almost g-gave it away earlier.  But..... ...I-I had to keep mum....”
“And I was positively dying inside during our whole tea party!”  Rarity waltzes in, dressed for the occasion with an elegant silk blue scarf and matching hoofpieces.  “But this was all Pinkie Pie's idea, and I wasn't about to dash it against the rocks like some scheming ursurper!”
“Well, whaddya think, Dashie?”  Pinkie Pie somehow pokes her head in Rainbow's face from upside down.  “Did we get ya or did we get ya?”
“Oh yeah, you got me...”  Rainbow Dash drones with a sly smirk.  “From the window of a horseshoe repository, even.”  Chuckles alight the air from the gathered crowd of random Ponyvilleans.
“Ohhhh look at her!”  Rarity mocks a faint.  “She knew it—She knew it!”  A playful glare is cast across the room.  “Twilight—In all our months of BFFing—You still don't know how to keep a secret, do you?”
“I tried!  I really d-did....”  Twilight bites her lip and kicks at the floor with a hoof.  “I'm so sorry, guys--”
“Awwww—You did your best best bestest and it was so sweet of you!”  Pinkie Pie bounces in place.
Fluttershy gently nudges the violet Unicorn.  “It's okay, Twilight.  Rainbow Dash isn't easy to fool.  I should know.”
“My right flank, you know!”  Rainbow Dash chuckles at Fluttershy.  “Remember that time I thought you were making faces with me for several minutes?  One of the gerbils you had fed scampered down your throat and you nearly choked to death!”
The crowd chuckles merrily.  Fluttershy hides a slightly frowning face under her pink locks of hair.  “Why do you keep mentioning things you said you never would?”
“Well let's not stand around here wallflowering like a bunch of boring little food spoiling germ carrying house flies!”  Pinkie Pie shimmies around, shouting everyone's ears off.  “We're here tonight to celebrate the glue that binds all of my friends together—and Ponyville as well!”
“Pssst!”  Spike suddenly appears, popping up from behind a bowl of punch.  “Pinkie, this is Ponyville!  Ex-nay on the glue-nay jokes-nay!”
“Wutever—Let's PARRRRR-TEHHHHH!  WOOO!  WOO!  Go Dashie!  It's your Rainboom Day!  Go Dashie!  It's your Rainboom Day!”
People cheer and clamor all over Rainbow Dash, giving her side hugs and nuzzles, inadvertently bumping her around in a sudden crowd surf.  “Ughhh....”  Rainbow barely holds onto her goggles.  “If I live through this to live this day down, I'm so gonna send her toothless lizard pet off to war.”
“Hey!”  A pink-scaled whelp shakes a fist.  “I heard that!”
“I was talking about Pinkie Pie and Gummy, Speck!”
“My name is Sp—Snkkt—Do you even SEE ME next to the PUNCH bowl? Get a clue!”
“Do promise you'll at least enjoy yourself tonight, Rainbow...”  Twilight leans over to her, smiling warmly.  “Pinkie Pie went through a real effort this time—She rarely ever caters at the Town Hall.”
“Yeah, yeah....Just for you guys...”  Rainbow Dash blinks.  “But OH!  What-ever will I do with all this attention!”
“Keep working on the dramatizing, darling.” Rarity trots by.  “But so far, that's three stars at best.”
“Words of wisdom from the expert—Say, why doesn't it smell like hay?”
“Apple J-Jack apologizes in advance.”  Fluttershy plays messenger.  A white bunny hops up out of nowhere and positions her cookie-nibbling self on the yellow Pegasus' mane.  “That's your last one, Angel--”  She looks at Rainbow Dash. “Something about a last second 'issue' she has to work on at the farm.  She should be here shortly.”
“Then that only gives us so much time to have some real fun!”  Rainbow Dash claps and rubs her hooves together.  “Alright all you hoofters!  Who's for Pin-the-Tail-on-the-Scootaloo?”
“H-Hey!”
“Hahahaha!”
“Heeheehee!”
“Hooooooboyo.”