//------------------------------// // So, Mom Came. // Story: Well, That Stinks. // by Nugget27 //------------------------------// Beep… Beep… Beep… So, I received a bit more than a concussion when I scared Celestia. When I scared her, I might’ve also hissed a couple of changeling curses, such as ‘Kizzzkt’ and ‘kzzrtz’. So logically, since Sunbutt is really smart, probably knows a few changeling words even if she literally cannot vocally reproduce them. Anyways, since I scared and cursed at the Princess while possibly breaching the family friendly tone of the chapter, I think she put a little more power into the spell she hit me with. Because I have a broken rib, or three, a concussion, a cracked headplate, my wings will be broken until I molt shortly after my recovery.  And my leg hurts. Which one? Just one of my legs, it wasn’t Lefty, it wasn’t Back Lefty, and it wasn’t Righty, so since I can barely remember what left and right was, I couldn’t name my hindleg on the right.  I hurt all over, mostly around my chest, my head, and my brain. I was connected to a bunch of machines that you’d think ponies wouldn’t have given their mostly primitive, everyday technology. I was laying on my back, in a bed, a blanket was pulled up to my forelegs, and I was just feeling great. Mostly because this weird thing, that was connected to me, kept going beep at a weird rhythm. I liked that rhythm because it was on beat with a changeling song, one we found after a weird portal opened up. It was in Equish, but we changelings liked it anyways despite most of us not even knowing the words. Something about Discord napping on a summer afternoon. It was a catchy song. Maybe Discord is off in that dimension, being an actually decent person- Discord looked around the Planet Earth, smiling. He had just saved the planet from a six mile long meteor, and he felt… good. The world that he was confined to, the one he made as a stone statue, was nice. Kinda. It was chaotic, and he loved it, so he kept it safe. On occasion, he would make a random ‘government official’ die randomly to spark a war. But recently, he decided to be nice and save the world he had started to call home. Which is why he threw such a tantrum when he was freed; he wanted to see what these weird, hairless apes would do, and when he returned to Equestria and was trapped again, a century had passed in this world. Now everypony was worshiping a thing called Pasta Monster, or something.  Discord took a sip of his lemonade that was actually made with lime, another chaotic invention from these apes. “It feels good to be home. I lied around, since I woke up to an empty room, besides Luna and Celestia sleeping, cuddled up next to each other, in a chair that was clearly too big for the two of them(under Celestia’s weight, the hoofrest was broken). I looked around, noting that Twilight and her friends were there too. I, on the other hoof, sat there humming the notes while I started chewing on a piece of the metal railing that was on my bed. I think I was supposed to rest my hooves on it, but I didn’t want to do that. I also hated being on a bed; it’s not cramped enough up here! There were only three occasions where I would happily forego sleeping underneath a bed. The first was with either of the Princesses present, since I often cuddled with them. Next was wih Ms. Breeze and her daughter, and lastly was whenever Royal Guardsmare would catch me off duty and take me to her room. Oddly, the last one was always happy to cuddle with me, even if there was a slight bit of disappointment in the air when we did it. Oh yeah, there was a fourth time when Fluttershy made me sleep on the bed because I banged my ankle with a crowbar on accident while trying to open my bedroom door that wouldn’t open.  No, my door was not locked, it just wouldn’t open because I ate the handle, while drunk on whatever the buck Pinkie Pie is running on, at one point. Something called Coltcane. Anyways, sleeping on beds is awful. I hate it. I want to go crawl under the bed, but I know Celestia will give me the same look Mom would give me whenever I asked something stupid. So I just laid there, and started chewing on the thing that went ‘beep’ whenever I breathed. I woke up again to Celestia and Luna, both sitting beside each other. Since they were both freakishly tall, which admittedly, made their legs very nice, they could rest their chins on the bed very easily while laying down. So the two of them were side by side, both of their heads resting on the bed, watching me. I blinked a couple of times, they blinked a few times, and then Celestia was the first to break the trance of the three of us just staring blankly at each other.  “Stinky, are you alright?” She asked, her voice was drenched in sorrow. “Yeah, I just have several injuries, and my head hurts a lot,” I said, rolling onto my side. I siffed the air. “Stop being sad, you two,” I said sternly. “It smells unpleasant, almost as unpleasant as you two smell when you both pretend to be happy to see the griffin king, or dealing with nobles in court. I was an idiot and tried to scare an alicorn, while being fully aware that I can’t conjure up a magical shield, and I paid for it,” I rolled onto my chest, using my forelegs to drag me over until I was nose to nose with the Royal Pony Sisters. I nuzzled both of them. “I still love you both, and I’m fine; I’m still alive, aren’t I?”  Luna raised her head. “Yes, I suppose, but I would rather you not be bed ridden; I would rather you be following myself or my sister, happily skipping around the castle or taking care of another foal,” Luna gave a lunar level side eye to her sister. “My sister has been on edge since the Royal Wedding, and is probably why she immediately tried to attack you…” Luna then glared at me. “After you broke, threw a solid, wooden door with your face, which would set off a jumpy alicorn.” Her emotions were beginning to feel like Mom when I almost got eaten by a wolf once. In other words, she was concerned for me. “Now, explain to me why you jumpscared my sister?” “She sent me to Ponyville and I had to ride with those six psychos,” I said flatly.  “Oh come on now, I’m sure the Elements cannot be that bad,” Celestia said with a smile. “I got tackled midair by Rainbow Dash. We crashed into the Town Hall and blew it up. That was the first thing that happened upon my return to Ponyville, your highness. I left before anypony could throw me a party, whatever that is.” “Oh… Oh dear,” Celestia whispered. “I think you may get foalnapped soon.” What? Why? Pinkamina Diane Pie stood in the sugar cube corner, her usually fluffy and puffy mane was flat, sitting there with a mad grin on her face. Around her was a bunch of party decorations, games, even a cake with liquid love in it. It was supposed to be Stinky and Bob’s changeling party, while Bob had shown up a week ago, Stinky had not, having fled to Canterlot. She pulled out a burlap sack, a rope, and with a manic smile, she grabbed a train ticket she had acquired earlier today, and started heading to the train station. “I’M COMING FOR YOU STINKY!” I sneezed a couple of times, somebody’s talking about me.  So, it’s been about a day since I woke up in the hospital. I managed to eat the machine that was going beep because it was getting annoying. I’m not in a hospital because I need to hear something say ‘beep’. I’m in here because everything hurts and I was thrown into a wall by a jumpy alicorn. Right now, I was staring up at a Changeling Queen, or rather, my mother. She was sitting beside me, wearing a sweet little smile. Somehow she had snuck into the castle again, this is the third time now, to see me. “You should’ve told them that love fuels a changeling’s healing; you’re fully healed,” she said. Oh. She’s right. I’m all good. “Why are you here?” I asked. “To inject me with random chemicals?” My mother cringed. “Ew, what?” “...You don’t remember doing that to Jeff on Hearth’s Warming because he asked for a hug?” I tilted my head. Seriously Mom, Jeff was my second favorite two times removed cousin. Aside from Bob. “Oh… I forgot I was disguised as Queen Chrysalis, that horrible monster of a Queen,” the thing in front of me was enveloped in changeling fire, before revealing… A Queen that looked almost exactly the same. Except her mane was longer. She looked younger, and a little prettier. Her eyes were a nice, deep blue rather than an acidic green. “I am Queen Forial, your actual mother. I have been looking for you for the last decade. Your… ‘mother’, Queen Chrysalis stole you while invading my Hive when you hatched,” the Queen smiled. “It is good to see that you are nice and healthy… and you are somehow a consort of both Princess Luna and Celestia!” She clapped her hooves. “I do hope you and Luna hit it off; I would love grandnymphs. Though if you marry your maid, I would get a granddaughter, and I would also like that…” She clapped her hooves together, likely dreaming of how to spoil my theoretical offspring. It’s weird to see a Changeling Queen actually act like a normal mare, after being raised by an apparent psychopath. “So that’s why you’re acting like…” I took a sniff. “A mother… I thought Queen Chrysalis landed head first, and became a decent changeling after receiving some blunt-force head trauma.” The Queen before me laughed. “Oh no, she’s preparing to invade Canterlot again after hearing the news about you being a Consort. She thinks this was your whole, grand scheme to try and overthrow her at the Hive, even though I’m sure you don’t even know what you’re doing.” I had just a part of my blanket during part of our conversation. It tasted good. “Oh.” I paused. “What’s a consort?” My mother paused, and giggled. “What?” “Oh, you poor, poor thing. You don’t even know what that is because you weren’t an infilitrator, were you?” I shook my head. “Basically, you are a very important changeling to the Princesses, and ‘consort’ is used for ponies, or changelings, or whatever the buck the Princesses fancies, as a legal way of saying they are taken; Celestia and Luna might want you as their mate. How you managed to sway them, I will never know.” “Celestia says I look cute when I rest my chin on the table. And Luna apparently likes my butt,” I said. “Well, ponies are strange creatures, but you are a handsome little changeling, my son,” Florial backed up from me and pranced in place. “Oh! I cannot wait! I always wanted to hold a picnic with you, but I couldn’t until I found you! I can… Be your mother,” she nuzzled me. “I would like to say… I’m sorry for what my cousin, Queen Chrysalis, did to you while growing up. She was always a bit deranged and sociopathic… And murderous, and straight up evil. She likes pineapple on pizza.” Florial hopped up on the bed, lifted me up, and rested me on the side of her belly. It felt… so nice. “Worry not, Beatle, I will keep you safe in the oncoming invasion, and I have my Hive hidden beneath Canterlot to give aid to ponies. I believe it is time that our Hive becomes an ally of Equestria.” I nodded blankly… this felt natural. And a sniff of the Queen I was using as a pillow… She wasn’t lying. This was Mother, I couldn’t help but shed a tear, this felt nice. On top of that, she didn’t smell like Chrysalis, who always smelled a little like poop. And anger, hatred, blood, and changeling blood. Yes, changeling blood has a different scent from other creatures’ blood. Florial smelled like flowers and some obviously fake, cheap perfume. “Can we play catch with a baseball?” I always wanted to do that with Chrysalis, but she threw the baseball in my eye and took a photo of it right when I got hit in the eye. I never asked to play catch with her again. My mother chuckled. “Of course we can. Oh, I cannot wait to reintroduce you to the rest of the Hive! They will love to know that their Prince is alive and well!” she licked my face, and I melted into her grooming of my carapace. I started to purr. And of course, I yelled ‘shut up, Mom!’ when I got teased for purring. Somebody knocked on the door, my mother and I were playing checkers, and she was letting me win in whatever, various board games we played together. I did one happy dance after winning a game of checkers, and Florial started letting me win games more. “Kzzrtz, Kzrrr,” I groaned. “Mom, somebody’s going to kill you if they see you,” I got up and started nudging her. “Please hide somewhere, I don’t wanna lose my Mom, the one that actually likes me.” “No, I don’t think I will…” My mother glared at me. “And watch your language, young bug, that's a slur used on southern changelings and you know it!” I shrunk back at her scolding. She then nuzzled me and gave me a reassuring smile. “What these Princesses don’t know is that I am stronger than Chrysalis is when she is fully charged with love. After all, somebody had to keep her in check while growing up, and as her older cousin, I was the one that stepped in. Now, don’t you worry your little head about me; I can fend for myself. Now the question is, will they hurt you? Because I will shove a flagpole up their rear end, just like I did with Blueblood.” The door cracked open and Celestia poked her head in. “Ah, Princess Celestia, it has been a while since we last spoke. About a century when we’ve had a cup of tea together… and shared a bed together. How are you?” Celestia glared at the Changeling Queen before her, before her eyes widened. “What does sharing a bed mean? Like when I cuddle with Luna?” Both Mom and Celly paused before turning to me. Mom forgot what was going on to explain what that meant. “We were lovers, Beatle, mates.” Florial answered. “Chrysalis sure did keep you sheltered, despite probably prying your carapace open.” “She did! And she dumped vinegar onto my bicep when she did that!” Florial shook her head. Smoke erupted from her ears, making even Celestia flinch in shock. “When I get my hooves on Chrysalis, I am smashing her head into a wall until there is merely a stub left.” Mom then nuzzled me on the cheek.  “Florial,” Celestia interrupted. “While I am glad for the visit, why are you here? After we both ended our relationship off, as friends, you never came back.” Celestia’s wings and ears drooped. “I missed you, you know.” “Oh, I did, I just never showed myself. Sometimes I would leave a present for you, perhaps a home baked cheesecake with chocolate drizzled onto it, with marshmallows dotted over it, topped with some whip cream? I made those for you once a year, every year of the one century we shared together.” My mother hummed. “You were always so happy, because it wasn’t even the fanciest cake you’ve eaten, or the best, you just loved it because I made it for you.” Florial chuckled. “Good times, don’t you say?” “They were, I’ve had a number of changeling lovers, but you had to be one of my favorite. Unfortunately, those of us that are immortal cannot remain in love forever; but such is life,” Celly said with a sad, little smile. Flarial gave her a sly grin. “And now you’re dating my son.” “Actually, I just made…” Celestia stopped. “Your son?” She slowly looked at me. “That, is your son? How!? He said his mother was Queen Chrysalis.” Florial started laughing. “Oh no, she foalnapped him when he was born. I am here for a number of reasons, to see my son again, love my son, and to help you for the upcoming war that Chrysalis plans on doing. You see, we Queens are pretty tight-knit since most of us are related to each other. Chrysalis was yelling about how her child got found in Canterlot, and how he was now Equestrian royalty or something. Given how most of her mates ran away from her after realizing how psychotic she is, I doubt she actually has children of her own. Most, if not all, of the changelings in her Hive aren’t even hers, only joining her because she happens to be a very powerful Queen.” Florial pointed at me. “And because you have ‘her son’, she’s going to invade Canterlot again.” “Of course, the rest of the Queens don’t like Chrysalis, so none of us are helping her. I’ve got my own Hive, and two others hiding under Canterlot right now, and we plan on capturing and killing that awful bug. With me as her executioner for taking my child, torturing him, and stunting his growth! He could’ve gotten a proper education and be intelligent-” “Mom, no I wouldn’t. I failed my IQ test when Chrysalis gave me one.” “...How do you fail that?” “Chrysalis snatched it away from me after I answered one question, since changelings aren’t allowed to be smart, especially drones.” I tilted my head. “Why do you both smell like you’re going to kill somebuggy?” I asked. “Celestia, let us go… negotiate our allyship, maybe even rekindle our relationship in another room. We should let my son get some rest.” Flarial said that, summoning a book about torturing a changeling. Celestia nodded. “I agree, I am quite looking forward to what page fifty four of your treaty says…” They’re going to peel Chrysalis like an orange and boil her like a… What do you boil? Crustatations? Changeling Queen, I guess is the only thing you boil besides a regular drone. The two of them walked side by side, reading a few pages quietly, out the door. So, I was left alone, in my room, with a Daring Do book I was chewing on, because I read it and it kinda sucked. Why do ponies like this again? It’s written like something a nymph would read. I mean, who would dare write this and call it literature? It had just called a poem that was written in changeling, a bunch of scribbles that was probably not written by an intelligent being! I threw the book out the window, where it actually split in two halves upon me doing so. I tilted my head before grabbing a secret, emergency sledgehammer from under my pillow, and walked up to the window before breaking both sides with it. Windows are made for breaking, not for splitting in half! “Come out Stinky! I have to throw a party for you!” Huh? Who’s that? “I know you’re in there!” I titled my head, before walking up to the door and opening it. The next thing I knew, a sack was thrown over my head, and I was dragged out of the castle, bumping my head on every single stair we went up and down. And then the sack was taken off my head and we were inside of a weird bakeshop. “Welcome to Sugarcube Corner!” Pinkie Pie said, she was her usual, cheerful self. There was a crowd of ponies inside the building with us. Bob was there two, cowering under a table with two mares. “The first game is dunk the changeling, and since I can’t find Bob, we’re just going to have to dunk you instead!” I titled my head. “What the buck is a party?” Pinkie stopped. She slowly looked me in the eyes. “So you didn’t skip my party on purpose?” She gasped. “And you don’t know what parties are?” “...Why else would I ask what a party is? Is that where you Part and E? What does the E stand for?” I soon was educated on what a party was, and actually enjoyed myself.