Soft exhales seemed to be the reoccurring theme. A feeble, but innocent attempt at keeping the ever growing shroud of darkness from reaching it's point of no return. The campfire in between seldom helped, only really when the wind wasn't working against her. It was funny, in a way. How a fractured mind could still so frivolously enjoy playing tricks on a subconscious that, by now, knew every trick in the book. One would think it easy to stop something you know is coming, but the beginning of the end is often never so black and white.
Of course, the face visible across roaring flame, the fire that more than adequately symbolized her burning heart, only precedes the continuous nightmare. A prelude to subconscious hauntings—a constant reminder that dreams co-exist with an alternate reality she can never have, an endless game of cat and mouse tumbling down a one-way rainbow road of false pleasures.
Funny, right?
For a perpetually over-casted mind such as hers this anything but melodic journey was all that and then some, though also nothing at the same time. A confusing mix of emotional highs and lows because it didn't seem to matter if she was awake or asleep; for either way it was impossible to get rid of the ghosts. One in particular being a colorful, brash, but beautiful apparition that seemed to always linger in her peripheral, causing jump scares an aching consciousness hated to love.
She let her chest rise and fall with unusual rhythm, defrosting chilled air inside her lungs as drawn-out exhales created the perfect little condensation clouds. It was the simple things during a night like this—somber moon reflecting distant sunlight down onto not only herself, but her all but fake hallucinations as well. The softness of night highlighting subtle features equally amongst companions as tree branches creaked in the breeze above them, their decaying leaves falling towards petrified ground in a make-shift rainstorm. A subtle hint that autumn had already begun, and winter was fast approaching.
"Twilight?"
It came as no surprise, at least not anymore, that a jaded mind found it impossible to focus on anything coherent anymore. Choosing to instead focus on inconsequential foolishness and overloaded fantasies, as if there was any difference anymore over what was considered reality, over what was right in front of her. Her studies were a mess back home, not to mention the one too many science experiments gone awry, and she tried.. Luna knows she's tried to not give in. To indulge in fictional make-beliefs that were far more forgiving than reality ever was, but that was just half the problem, wasn't it? Call it a side effect of a self-familiarizing, absent-minded thought process.
"Twilight..!"
"Mm.. Hmm? W-what..?" Twilight ripped her distant stare from the flames she was supposedly staring at. Her fidgeting in place was all-but impossible to stop as her wings twitched against her sides, most likely deciding whether to fight or flight. Her hazed mind quickly found exposed cheeks turning red as distracted eyes scanned the five other pairs staring directly back at her. It happened again, didn't it? She had once again gotten lost in the ever expanding black hole of a maze that was her own subconscious.
"Twilight, dear? Is everything alright?" Came a soft, worrisome voice from her right.
The clearing of dry throat was long overdue, her persistent cough reverberating through dark forest and sky alike. "I-I'm.. fine." Twilight half-smiled.
Rarity raised a suspicious eyebrow, seemingly unconvinced at what she was currently witnessing, but she chose to let it go all the same. "Well then, you must tell us what your opinion on this is?" Rarity questioned as she hovered over a stick she had so graciously stolen from the currently scowling cyan Pegasus.
Twilight found her longing gaze slowly returning back into the roaring fire, though that didn't stop the corners of her lips from curving upwards slightly at the unfamiliar sight being floated into center vision. "It's.. a burnt marshmallow?" She said, simply stating what her eyes saw. The once white and fluffy treat now a charred and deformed monster, still half on fire on the end of its warped, natural spear.
"Aha! You see, Rainbow? This thing is utterly inedible!" Rarity turned to face the narrow eyed Pegasus sitting grumpily across from Twilight, a gleaming smirk plastering itself on amused facial features.
"What!?" Rainbow belted out, her wings dragging her into a hovering state just above her velvety sleeping bag she was using as a cushion. "It so isnt!" Rainbow spoke loudly and quickly as if she was on a deadline, soon finding her eyes locking intently onto silhouetted lavender facial features, her last hope at getting her marshmallow back which was so ruthlessly stolen. "C'mon, Twi! Help me out here!"
A still returning Twilight blinked a few times, just for good measure, still not exactly sure what sort of half-baked argument was occurring in this apparent kangaroo court. She felt her head move on autopilot towards the grounding, yet hovering voice, glancing up in the general direction of familiarized tone like a lost puppy pawing at a locked door of their forever home. Though one thing, albeit a given if this reality was still reality, was clear to her faraway gaze. Luna's daunting rock in the sky, the moon she would rather be caught staring at on a night like this over anything else, was no longer in the same position than before her unplanned departure, before she had last bothered to try and pay attention.
Twilight shook her head, once again focusing her off-track thoughts. "I-I only said that it was burnt; it was just an observation.." Twilight quarterly defended, manipulation 101 as to not exactly agree or deny anything. It was both a gift and a curse to have her subconscious twist and warp her every word when Rainbow Dash was involved, even if she didn't exactly agree with the charred ball of future cavities going into said mare's mouth. Most of the time it was innocent things like this that caused but a disagreement amongst ghosts. Though the odd time it ended up being more curse than gift—if only to see the prismatic mare smile.
"Ha! You heard the mare!" Rainbow reveled in the returning smirk gracing her lips. She gave a sly wink in Twilight's direction as if to silently say thank you, earning an immediate look-away blush combo from the Alicorn. It was the words of Twilight Sparkle being twisted in any way, shape or form to fit the opposing mare's narrative, and she had won this little side game, all thanks to the bookworm.
"Oh, fine then.. Here, I was getting tired of holding it anyway.." Rarity sighed as she gave one last once-over of sugary treat in frivolous defeat before hovering the crisp marshmallow over to Rainbow's outstretched and waiting wing, to the mare that had the 'pleasure' of eating that charred monstrosity, another sigh escaping judging lips.
"Would somepony please remind me why is it we decided to come up here again?" Rarity involuntarily sighed out for the third time in the span of all-but 1 minute. Her brightly glowing horn causing the immediate surroundings to light up the moon-lit darkness behind her once again as she stretched the already overstretched blanket over herself, a half-ditch effort to stay somewhat warm. She wasn't trying to be Ms. Negative Nancy, she was just genuinely curious at why they had all, even herself, equally agreed to go camping instead of doing, well, anything else.
"Ah do seem to recall it was you who suggested this kinda thing in the first place, Rares." Applejack tipped her hat up from over her face, half-closed eyes helping keep herself balanced as she shifted her back into a better position on the once tall, now fallen tree. She scanned the unamused unicorn through open flames with her peripheral, an innocent, but interrogating smile drawing clear intent onto orange.
"Yes, I do remember suggesting it, months ago, darling." Rarity shot a raspberry through exposed fire, letting it get red hot before landing on it's unsuspecting target. She watched with a hidden smile as the hat covering the mares face jumped slightly, a singular chuckle being the reason for such comedic action. "What I do not remember suggesting is going in the middle of October?" She crossed her forelegs over her blanket as if to prove her half point half question to the rest of her friends, like it needed proving in the first place. The temperature had to be in the low double digits, cold enough to make drawn out exhales slightly visible amongst fire-lit backdrop
Twilight however would pay no mind to further questions and tribulations; for her mind had, once again, zoned out her friend's pointless bickering. These continuous departures from reality weren't exactly by choice mind you, hiding away inside herself wasn't exactly her idea of a relaxing time out in nature. She would much rather spend her time chatting with friends or looking up at the stars with a good book highlighted in the venerating glow of fire, but these unplanned vacations were beginning to become impossible to not only stop, but predict.
Though one thing out of all this did truly amazing her, how her mind could pick and choose who and what to listen to and what not to. This sort of glorified selective hearing she was developing was scarily taking on a whole new meaning in her personal dictionary and it was only getting worse, as if she had the willpower to control any of it. The heart wants what the heart wants, right? That's what every cheesy romance book she's read on the subject of stolen hearts says anyway. If only her lost heart wasn't trapped behind a prismatic deadbolt of ambiguity, a mystical force she had absolutely no idea how to unlock.
Of course, one could easily say these sort of things about anything in life. Her situation wasn't exactly unique and she knew that, at least in the historical sense. Something's too difficult? 'If only it was easier..' Talk about an endless loop of procrastination. Delaying the inevitable shutdown of dreams turned disaster and it was only a matter of time before her own walls came crumbling down for all the same reasons. One such reason being a mare of all things, an hallucination of unsuspecting thoughts plaguing just that; unsuspecting thoughts.
But it was all the same in the end wasn't it? A ghost innocently eating a pitch black marshmallow without a care in the world. The sound of dreams laughing from a distance, across blazing fire, causing her chest to really form in on itself, the mouth full of marshmallow muffling her voice as she giggled at something or other. Perked lavender ears heard it all, even when Rainbow wasn't anywhere close—another curse disguised as anything but a gift.
"—ilight? A-are you awake? It's your turn." Fluttershy beamed innocently from across open inferno.
"I.." Twilight began, but quickly found her words eluding her mouth. "My.. turn..?" Twilight quickly wore a smile to hide her growing confusion, to hide growing embarrassment of once again getting lost in a stationary position. At this point it was a not-so-hidden, hidden talent. A so called 'talent' that she should have kept at home under layers of blankets with a good book and piping hot tea. Rarity was right, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to go on this trip after all, said she was sick or something to get out of this glorified, never-ending game of telephone.
"Twilight? Darling? Are you sure you're alright?" Rarity repeated her earlier question once more, concern in the back of her voice being clearly noticeable to all curious glances this time around.
Purple iris's heavily followed the circle of stones keeping burning charcoals casting their tall flames from expanding any further, her vision interestingly observing that not everypony could be accounted for. Applejack was missing from her usual spot, and so was the pink mass of chaos. Twilight felt her brow furrow, her mind completely ignoring Rarity's clear as day question. How much time had passed since they had left? How much time since the moon had once again shifted it's position? Who was to say what she was seeing right now was even real?
"What did I miss?" Twilight persisted, bringing both forelegs up to her head to rub both her temples equally. She tentatively brought her glance away from chiseled stones to soul level, her remote stare locking intently with luminously-lit cyan. The rogue part in her brain, which by now could be classified as all of it, screamed at her to lunge over roaring fire in a romantic feat of passion, to finally break away from these tiring, dream-inducing fantasies once and for all; for these constant staring contests were prolonged provocations she had little chance of ever winning.
"Oh..! We were just playing a game. It's called, never have I ever." Fluttershy answered through seemingly forced open eyes, clearly being up past her usual bedtime.
Twilight felt her entire body begin to prolapse, the sudden release of all stored body heat quickly draining from any ease of access spot it could as chilling, fall air quickly overtook the warmth radiating from structured bonfire. Her once distant stare was warping into one of silent panic as if she had just seen a ghost which, if anypony were to ask, wasn't exactly false. She was staring at three right now.
Rainbow let her Insinuating, magenta eyes quietly observe the mare having what seemed like a semi-controlled, mild panic attack from across the open fire. Now, it wasn't her initial plan to have Twilight go into full on panic mode, its why she got fluttershy to tell her what was going on. But if seemed even Fluttershy couldn't bring the mare back safely. "Hey! C'mon, Twi! Just play one more round with us?" Rainbow pressed. One way or another she had to get this mare to play, to finally loosen up for what would most definitely be the first time in a long time. Celestia knows the mare needed it.
Her expanding gaze ripped itself from cyan, instead locking into the burning embers of her heart once more. This game her friends were playing at was an almost guaranteed recipe for disaster weeks, if not months in the making. She could already feel her fissured mind racing a million hooves a second trying to determine the pros and cons of each possible question they could ask. Twilight felt a sharp sigh escape her already jarred jaw. One round. One round was all Rainbow was asking for, but who was to say what would happen in that single round? That one measly game wouldn't end up turning into two, and two into thr—
"A-alright.." Twilight blurted out, somehow completely ignoring her own scurrying thoughts. Her eye twitched in both continued mild panic along with now sudden irritation as the blistering fire before her erupted with a loud crackle, an explosion of embers lighting the night sky above them like fireflies. Of course her heart would somehow manage to override anything her brain was trying to accomplish with a well timed display of idiotic passion to go along with it. And it was once again a stupid decision by the rogue organ, one she was now locked into whether she liked it or not.
Cyan wings extend slightly from their resting spots, hidden excitement only known to their owner causing a genuine smile to form on once waiting lips. The unsuspecting Twilight across from her being just that, unsuspecting. This, as the Alicorn in question liked to say, 'distracted' mare had been avoiding almost all of their interesting conversations all night, instead being consistently trapped in her own little bubble only a singular wings flap away. It was kind of impressive.
"Flutters, you wanna go first?" Rainbow peered over, delaying nothing, eager to get the next batch of questions rolling.
"O-okay.." Fluttershy half fixed her slouched posture, her now slightly more awake eyes curiously glancing at each of her friends. "Um.. n-never have I ever.. stolen something?"
Rainbow was the first to put her hoof up, house rules being if you were convicted of doing something, you must raise your hoof. And if you were caught in a known lie, then a forfeit was ruthlessly dished out. They were somewhat omitting rules, not exactly explained in full detail every time unless you were brand new. Who would have thought lying was more often than not a regular occurrence during a game that was meant to go after your darkest secrets.
The mare two to her left, unsurprisingly, kept her hoof down. Though if Rarity was lying she couldn't exactly prove it was a lie, so the suspicious mare was off the hook, this time. It was the newest player to join, Twilight on the other hoof that had said hoof raised just shy of her chin, as if trying to hide the embarrassing fact she had committed such a heinous crime in her youth, a sheepish smile adorning her lips to tie the whole rather adorable scene together.
"Wait- seriously!?" Rainbow howled into the almost full moon, clutching her chest in a sudden mix of shock and amazement, flabbergasted that the Twilight Sparkle had actually committed theft in the past.
"W-what!? I.. lost my library card subscription that weekend.." Twilight pleaded with an embarrassed smile to her sudden jury, but it was more-so perceived as an overdue confession by the other mares sat around the burning logs of recession.
"My my, Twilight. Who knew you were such a bad filly!" Rarity teased the now beet red Alicorn. She gave a side eyed stare towards the still loudly snickering Pegasus staring down Twilight's sheet-like form, causing Rainbow to swiftly cease her in-awe laughter, at least on the outside.
"Right. My turn is it?" Rarity shifted her head up in thought, not waiting for any of her friends to recuperate as a tilting smile formed on her lips, the small action hopefully causing fear to ring through her friend's awaiting ears. "Hmm.. Never have I ever, snooped through someone's private belongings?" Rarity questioned. Intrigued, but malicious intent written all over her sharp grin.
Twilight proudly kept her hoof down for this one, an innocent smile replacing embarrassment. She had no need to overthink this one, let alone lie about it. She had fortunately never been given the uncomfortable position of trifling through another ponies private items in the first place. Though her objectifying eyes silently, unsurprisingly, glared at Rainbow who was also keeping her hoof down. It was Fluttershy that lip-bitingly raised hers, breaking the tense silence as it rose just enough to be visible above the tips of flames.
"Fluttershy? Dear, care to explain why your hoof is raised?" Rarity pursed her lips together to stop her sudden intense curiosity from boiling over, not wanting to seem too eager for a juicy story.
Rainbow chuckled with an over exaggerated eyeroll for an unbeknownst reason to both her confused friends. She watched as her yellow friend eeped from behind extened wings now converging her face like a parrot playing peekaboo. She wasn't exactly fazed by that sudden, albeit anti-climactic, bombshell. She's known Fluttershy for a long time—unknown stories that mare has hidden away that would make even the strong-minded cower in fear. The true definition of don't judge a book by it's cover.
Twilight took her eyes off the now, understandably, cowering yellow Pegasus. She instead rested her blurring vision on the un-stoked, but still blazing fire before her, it's soft flickers of light strobing in and out of her foggy sight. It was her turn to ask a question, and it was making her head spin with once unthought of opportunities, but what could she ask? Of course, she could all-but hear her subconscious begging her to ask something related to Rainbow and her love life, however that was a sure-fire way to ruin everything in one fell swoop. Her best bet of getting through this in one piece was to just ask a normal inquiry. Something that was interrogating like Rarities was, but innocent at the same time as to not give anything secret away.
Twilight peered up from the hypnotic flickering light before her, an uncharacteristically devious glimmer appearing in the corner of her now somewhat focused eyes. "Never have I ever, lied to a Princess?" Twilight questioned with the most coherent voice she's had all night. She felt a shiver of excitement shoot down her spine, something she hasn't felt in what seems like forever ago.
Her owl vision scanned each of her friends almost equally, finding her eyes trailing a bit longer over cyan curves owned by a mare who was obviously deep in thought. The fact that Rainbow had to think about it this long was a dead giveaway that she had indeed lied about something to somepony of high authority. But the real question still remained, what did she lie about?
Rainbow dragged an irritated stare over suddenly towering flames, locking it directly onto the questioner. Soon enough her hoof was raised high into the air, the only one out of the other two so it made her stick out like a sore wing. But what made this whole thing worse, or maybe better? She couldn't quite decide on that, was the look of pure joy plastered on lavender, the mare most likely reveling in her hoof work. Twilight was enjoying herself.
"Look..! I may or may not have lied to a certain Princess of the night about--" Rainbow stopped herself, keeping the details of said lie a closely guarded secret, at least for now. "It was only one time, alright??" Rainbow swiftly finished, crossing her forelegs with an unamused pout.
Twilight couldn't help but let out continued giggles at Rainbow's sudden cute, and flustered appearance. It was a sight for sore eyes for a mind that desperately needed anything other than a melancholic dream. Her vision instinctually connected with magenta from across flames in a tango of externally lit thoughts, Rainbow's eyes following hers in what could only be described as out of place joy. Twilight let a sigh of contentment escape her lips, the sight she was focusing on making her forget that there was still one more question to go, and it was Rainbow's turn.
Rainbow took in a deep breath, her stare never leaving Twilight's as she slowly recovered from the sudden flurry of emotions attached to Twilight's completely, most definitely targeted question. Twilight had to have known that somehow, it was way too suspicious to be deemed as accidental. She had to hoof it to the mare however, it was genuinely a good question, one that the bookworm probably knew would catch her off guard. Though even despite the appreciation, revenge was the only good train left in the station.
"Never have I ever.. had an embarrassing crush?" Rainbow deadpanned.
Twilight felt her entire body once again freeze under the familiar veil of fear. She tried her best to keep her poker-face active, but it was quickly turning into one of the most exhausting tasks she's ever had the pleasure of pulling off. That voice asking that question was like a rocket of unprecedented proportions shooting right into her heart. The real question was however, did she raise her hoof? Could she reliably play it off as something that had nothing to do with Rainbow if said questionnaire persisted for an explanation?
Her heart skipped a beat, the flames before her flickering from rogue wind as her eye twitched in silent fear. And slowly, as if performing surgery, Twilight raised her trembling hoof into the air just shy of her chin, it's purple color being highlighted by the yellowish-orange glow of rapidly decaying and growing fire. It felt as if her outstretched appendage was raising itself, like it wanted to be caught red-hoofed by the mare it so deeply desired.
"Alright! That's game!" Rainbow suddenly chirped, as if the question she had just asked never even left her lips.
Watching the whole thing play out through totally not suspicious dinner-plate eyes wasn't helping much either, but she couldn't afford to look away either. It was a delicate balance she was terrible at keeping as her eyes watched the prismatic Pegasus study her from across the fire. Though Rainbow wasn't reacting quite as she thought she would. Sure, it was a fairly ambiguous question, the other two sat to her right also having their hooves raised unsuspiciously, one that could very easily be taken many different ways. Maybe it was just her mind making it seem worse than it actually was; for it knew things that Rainbow didn't, which made the seemingly innocent question 10x worse for her reality.
"Uh, Twi? You can lower your hoof now?" Rainbow snickered, her eyes still seemingly not once being taken off lavender facial features.
Fluttershy immediately let out a contagious yawn at the cease to excitement, quickly closing her eyes as if falling asleep right then and there in her slouched sitting position.
"If I do say, Fluttershy is right. It's as good a time as ever to join the others in getting some beauty sleep." Rarity stated with a yawn of her own, a small smile directed at the exhausted Fluttershy who probably hasn't been up this late in ages.
"Are you girls coming?" Rarity questioned as she sat up, lifting her blanket in her magic as a shiver from the veil of cold air quickly enveloping her exposed form. She poked the half-awake mare with a glint of magic to unfortunately force her up, earning a small moan of disapproval in response, but sleeping in that position was destined to cause back problems.
"I think I'm gunna stay a bit longer." Rainbow responded with a smile, her eyes moving swiftly between yellow and white, but staying in place as they landed on purple once more, a questioning glance aimed at the Alicorn.
Twilight bit her lip as Rainbow stared at her, the cyan mares words reverberating through her cracked mind with a flutter of her heart. "I-I think I'm going to stay, as well.." Twilight answered her leaving friend, earning an all to familiar smirk from the only other pony still sitting. She slowly watched through her peripheral as the two tired mares left the radiating warmth of campfire, leaving into bathed moonlight towards their respective tents.
She couldn't exactly say how long they both sat there in silence, one curiously staring at the other while the other figuratively pawed at hypnotizing flames. It was a dance of ice and fire. Though devil is often silence, and this current scene was painfully silent. The only sound being the popping of burning hot wood and the soft rustling of decaying leaves, the whole thing feeling like some sort of weird fever-dream instead of reality.
Eventually the uncomfortable silence was broken by the familiar sound of hooves weaving through dew soaked grass, interrupting the growing familiarity of it all. Perked lavender ears followed the nerve-wrenching sound like a bat tracking it's prey, but her eyes stayed stationary straight ahead. It was as if a single unchecked breath could cut the tension in the air with a butter knife.
Though the feeling was indistinguishable, to have somepony you desire to be so close, yet so far. To sit close enough to feel their side ever so gently brush against your every sudden wrong movement, but nothing more. It was like a sixth sense suddenly decided to exist, causing shivers of both excitement and fear to shoot through ones entire being.
"So.." Rainbow quickly broke the eerie silence. "You're a thief, huh?" The smirk could be heard clear as day in her voice as she lightly bumped shoulder to shoulder with frozen dusk.
"W-what?? I'm- you raised your hoof as well..!" Twilight shot back, not sure where the sudden confidence boost came from. "What did you even steal anyways?" Twilight interrogatingly asked, genuine curiosity replacing most of the fear she once had.
"Uh.." Rainbow stalled, looking away in slight embarrassment. "It's.. kinda embarrassing, so don't laugh, alright?" Rainbow sucked in a deep breath before continuing. "Do you remember the last Daring Do book that came out?" Rainbow's ears immediately swiveled to the direction of Twilight's already stifled giggling to her right, earning the bookworm a soft hoof to the ribs in response. "Hey! What did I say? I-I got impatient, alright! It was a big line, and I saw the extra copies in the back, so I snuck through and took one!"
Twilight let her now uncontrollable fit of giggles fill the atmosphere around them, the full story being way better than she could have ever imagined. She yelped in surprise during her relentless laughter as the cyan hoof returned to playfully poke her once again in the side. "I-I'm sorry! It's just.. not the story I expected." Twilight chucklingly admitted, the genuine smile she was sporting making the Pegasus to her left halt her probing hoof, raising a questioning eyebrow instead.
"Oh? Just what did you expect?" Rainbow leant in closer to Twilight's pokable ribcage, her eyes grilling the mare's side profile for an answer to this sudden revelation.
"I.. I don't know..! You back in school; an answer sheet for a test you didn't study for maybe?"
Cyan mass lent back, a mock look of hurt taking over her as she audibly gasped. "Wow egghead! Words hurt, y'know!" Rainbow teased the unsuspecting Alicorn.
Twilight quickly backpedaled her statement. "N-n-no! I didn't mean it like that! I-I mean.. Sure, you definitely could have applied yourself more to the written side of your education, you're clearly smart enough to do so. You just took more interest in the physi—"
Twilight suddenly jumped out of her coat as a howl of laughter exploded from her left, the wolves in the forest almost certainly temped to respond to the mares call as her train of thought was completely ruined. "R-Rainbow?!" Twilight felt her wings extending out from behind her with a mind of their own in pure embarrassment as she eyed Rainbow through her peripheral, a flustered scowl clearly present.
"C-come on, Twi! That.. that was too easy!" Rainbow chuckled out, leaning forward to quickly steal a glance at the massive blush staining purple cheeks.
Rainbow cleared her drying throat, her laughter dying down to the familiar quiet once more as her eyes longingly trailed the dimly lit, outlined facial features of the mare next to her for longer than she probably should have. "Hey, uh, ur not that tired yet, right?" Rainbow brought her eyes away from the purple silhouette, if only for a second. "If you're not, I just so happened to have a book for us to read, if you want to relax a bit before you decide to hit the hay?"
Twilight's felt a shiver shoot down her spine, not because it was currently pushing negative temperatures outside, though that was a factor at play, it was more-so the fact that Rainbow was asking to read with her on a perfect night like this. "S-sure, Rainbow." She replied on autopilot, longingly staring at nothing in particular.
"Awesome! Don't go anywhere!" Rainbow beamed, showing a little too much excitement, though it went unnoticed by the once again far-away Alicorn. She quickly took off into the dark sky in one swift motion, leaving Twilight alone with what she could only guess was her rambling thoughts.
Twilight's eyes trailed the darkness that the cyan mass had shot into just moments ago. Sucking in a deep breath of chilling air was all she felt like doing, being alone out in the woods like this made a sense of dread coarse through her veins. A small part of her brain half expected Rainbow to not come back, to never return from the black shroud that was ever-so creeping up on her—this whole thing being some elaborate prank to pull at already pulled heartstrings. That would be the icing on the cake, wouldn't it?
Either way this was about to be uncharted territory she had the unfortunate pleasure of diving head first into without any warning. Of course, her demons knew how to swim by now which meant that one wrong move and her overflowing consciousness would be sprawled out before her for those beautiful magenta eyes to see clear as day.
Twilight felt her brow furrow, recollection of what Rainbow had said before suddenly taking off slowly setting in. What did Rainbow mean by 'us'? That specific word was reverberating around inside of her head like a broken record, as if Rainbow had pre-meditated this whole thing? An elaborate ruse to lure her into a false sense of security to spill her deepest, darkest secrets?
Twilight shook her head, trying to get the thoughts that were too vivid to be real out of her head. It was probably, most definitely, nothing. An overstimulated brain conjuring up fictional fantasies to cure insatiable needs, but even Rainbow couldn't deny her choice of words wasn't at least a little eyebrow raising.
"Twi?"
But even where a distracted mind was a safe haven from uncertain reality, there was no staying hidden for long; for soon enough the cyan Pegasus would return to fill her vision once more. Her mind fighting against itself about frivolous things that most likely didn't matter in the current moment, but that wasn't exactly uncommon now. Absent-mindedness in her life was, after all, the new normal.
"Twiiilight? C'mon, egghead!"
"Mmm.. Hmm?" Twilight lazily brought her blurred vision front and center, the familiar glow of fire filling her far away sight once more.
"Equestria to bookworm! You gunna leave me to read this thing all alone or what?" Rainbow spoke from afar through her soft grin.
Twilight found her thoughts cut off as her friend's words set in. Rainbow was back already? How long had she been sitting here for? "S-sorry..!" Twilight stammered out through her sudden, but usual embarrassment. The cyan blur she knew was coming back was indeed next to her, laying by herself quietly only a few hooves away, the roaring fire still bathing her in both heat and light equally.
Now, Twilight knew this night was already way off book, but what her eyes were showing her was on a whole new level of insanity. Rainbow was laying in her unrolled sleeping bag with a book she couldn't quite recognize nestled under her hoof, the over the shoulder glare Rainbow was sending her direction shooting violent shivers up frozen lavender back and out stiffening wings.
She felt her legs move, but it wasn't her brain firing the signals anymore, it was her heart. She could feel the organ wanting to burst out of her chest as she felt the soft fabric beneath her hooves, watching the free cyan hoof pat the empty spot next to her in an inviting manor.
"You uh, you ever read this before?" Rainbow removed her other hoof from the book she was keeping a secret from prying purple eyes, moving it closer to Twilight's lowering form.
"W-what's it called?" Twilight responded, letting out a silent scream as her belly pressed against the cold, but quickly warming sleeping bag. She felt the mare next to her shift her position slightly so they were almost touching, the small draft of air between both of their exposed sides sending heart-wrenching emotions through an already over-stimulated brain.
Lowering her vision, still reveling in close proximity of a nuclear reactor of warmth, Twilight slowly allowed her eyes to read the books title that was being lit by a backdrop of fire behind her. Immediately she let out a giggle, but not because of the book itself, it was actually a good read, but because it was not something she would have thought Rainbow to enjoy.
"What's so funny?" Rainbow brought her hoof over to steal her book back, or Twilight's book? She may or may not have taken it from Twilight's library before coming up here..
"I didn't think you'd like something like this, Rainbow?" Twilight questioningly stated, the boost of confidence from the sudden comedic relief helping soothe her jumbled speech. She snatched the book back out from under the protective cyan hoof with her magic, her eyes glancing over the purple-lit cover once more as if to make sure what she had read was indeed true. The word DUNE, all in one column was plastered in big font on the hard copy cover, it's sandy background giving off a clear, but spicy reaction from the cyan mare next to her.
"I remember you reading it a little while ago, back when you were in your faze of re-reading a bunch of classics, so I figured.. Y'know..?" Rainbow trailed off, shifting closer to Twilight's side in order to properly see the book the lavender mare was hogging all to herself. She felt Twilight tense up as their sides gingerly rubbed together, each rise and fall of their chests causing friction to increase the temperature ever so slightly. It was an innocent connection on an innocent night of reading as the mare she was connecting to found the back description of the book to be very interesting all of a sudden.
"W-wait, so this is my copy? You do realize how old this book is then, right?" Twilight stated matter-o-factly. She was starting to remember, Rainbow had been hanging in her study a lot that week for some reason or another. She remembered her being very distracting..
"Hey! I made sure to take good care of it! See?" Rainbow extended a foreleg to touch the spine of the book, dragging it along as she leaned over into Twilight's personal bubble, practically shoving her mane into her face. "Not a scratch on it!"
"I-I can see that, Rainbow." Twilight muffled out behind a curtain of rainbow, biting her lip as she involuntarily took in a deep breath of Rainbow's mane. She silently hated herself for doing that, but in the moment it was so worth it. The smell of morning dew and.. rose? Most likely the shampoo she used filling her senses to intoxicating levels.
Twilight flipped open the hard-cover as she watched the welcoming mane leave her vision, the familiar words as she started to pre-read the first chapter returning memories of that night in her study a month or so ago. She glanced out of her peripheral at her reading partner, who was actively also reading silently. It was then when a devious idea popped into her head. It was risky and had the potential to ruin everything, but the atmosphere and the mood was almost perfect not to attempt anything. She wouldn't forgive herself if she did nothing.
"Rainbow?" Twilight all-but squeaked out in her accidental Fluttershy impression. She watched as the magenta pools kept eyeing the page, a raised eyebrow at her name being called just as the reading began.
"What's up?" The half paying attention mare responded.
"Could you.. Do you think you could read out loud?"
Rainbow felt her lips curve upwards in a genuine smile. Though she didn't reply to the request with words. She instead extended her wing out as best she could given the cramped interior to cover the mare to her left in a full on wing-blanket, her cyan feathers mixing gently with lavender as she pulled Twilight in to her side as close as she could. Soon her voice filled the empty air around them as if the tender action had never occurred, the somber atmosphere being lit up by the sudden body heat they were both radiating.
The words as they entered her flattened ears came and gone, it was as if she couldn't pay attention to save her life. Rainbow had her wing around her, a ghost turned Swayze in a sudden action that was anything but normal even for her bent reality. Her eyes instinctually moved to the crook of Rainbow's inviting neck, another rogue idea forming in her scrambling mind. Screw it, right? She meant it, her earlier words. This was turning into that moment, and she was going to ride it out into a blaze of glory one way or another.
Twilight sheepishly tilted her head down, moving it forward and to the right to nestle herself perfectly into cyan neck, being careful of her horn of course. She shut her eyes, this moment being too much for her eyes to even comprehend at this point as she felt a sigh of relief escape not only her lips, but her shoulders as well. It felt as if the weight of Equestria was lifted off of her back by this one single action and she couldn't be any higher on cloud 9.
The call of Luna's realm of sleep soon overtook the feelings of foreign contentment, her eyes becoming heavy as she listened to her soothing lullaby by the same mare she dreamed about every single night. Part of her didn't want to sleep, to relish this moment for as long as she could, but it wasn't exactly easy to keep the dream world at bay when this was her sleeping arrangement, being cuddled up to a figment of her imagination that was no longer at a distance in her peripheral. Instead being right next to her, reading a bedtime story with a soft wing wrapped tightly to protect her.
Rainbow bit the inside of her cheek gently as she let the words on the page flow out her voice box like a brand new record player. It didn't take long for Twilight to get comfortable at her side, the soft, rhythmic rise and fall of their combined breathing becoming a second, almost natural feeling. It was a welcome one, to have somepony let their guard down so easily around you. To watch their stress float away in short breaths of condensation, moon light shining through vapor clouds like a glorified ghost. It truly was a peaceful sight.
Of course, she knew Twilight would soon be out like a flick of a light. Half the time this mare next to her spoke she had to treat it like opposite day; for when Twilight said she wasn't tired she more than likely was, but that's what made this whole thing all the more special. It was a never ending story of two lives interconnecting when one didn't even realize it, a dance of cosmic proportions all to end up nestled in the same tight-knitted space on a cold, autumn night. One could easily call it a bad case of absent-minded serendipity, and they would be exactly right.
Rainbow leisurely stopped eyeing the words on the page, lifting her record needle up for a deep-chested sigh of discontentment, one that she had been holding in for a while now. Her eyes instinctually trailed over the face currently trying to nestle further into the base of her neck, not knowing if Twilight herself even knew what she was doing at this point. However the sight before her made it clear, clear about how she truly felt about this mare. This was no longer a game she wanted to keep playing at.
To Twilight, this whole thing was never a 'game' in the first place. The mare that was now treating her like she was her own personal teddy? That was what she was contending with, the reality being she didn't quite understand her own feelings up until now, at least fully. Sure, she danced the tango well, hiding her true intentions in child-like glances from afar and innocent visits to Twilight's study. The camping trip and game tonight being specifically chosen by her to figure out not only herself, but Twilight as well.
Rainbow bit her lip as she fidgeted uncomfortably in her spot. Something within the past minutes had changed, and she was going to go mad trying to figure out exactly what. Why the sudden exposition of selfish thoughts bombarding a once focused mind into oblivion? This didn't make any sense to her, she was no longer in complete control of the game, and that single fact was nerve-wrenching.
"Nnm.. D-Dash? Why.. did you stop..?" The sleepy voice softly vibrated into cyan neck.
"I.. I'm sorry, Twi." Rainbow swiftly put her now deformed needle back down onto the turn table, her wing voluntarily following orders, pulling the tired mare in closer as her voice picked up roughly where she left off who knows how long ago. She now knew what Twilight felt like after coming back from one of her little self-casted distraction spells. Neverland has never felt so wonderful.
The words of the first chapter flew out of her mouth on autopilot, vowels and syllables mixing in perfect harmony as her mind continued to destroy itself from the inside out. There was still time, to stop this whole thing. To call it a night and trudge back to her lone tent through the now surely negative temperatures. To leave Twilight all alone wondering what she had done wrong.. How a fitting end for a race that was so close to the finish line.
Of course, there was always the opposite option of total self-destruction, but neither of these options fit her role in this game. The last thing she wanted to do was to break the heart of a mare she cared deeply for, of a mare she would have to spend the rest of her life knowing that she did that to her. She shattered her dreams. She missed out on her.
"Twilight..?" Rainbow involuntarily spoke, stopping her reading. The needle in her throat all but breaking on the spot from the sudden, jolting halt. It was now or never.
"Mhmm?"
"I.. I never asked earlier, when you joined in on the game we were playing?" Rainbow stared off into the distant darkness that was slowly closing in on her. "Who.. was your embarrassing crush?" Rainbow let out, a spark of fear igniting its own fire deep in the back of her mind. She knew the answer, but the question still made her uncharacteristically nervous.
Twilight haplessly raised her head from the best pillow she's had in months, only to stare at the side profile of Rainbow's face. "W-what..?" Twilight sputtered, her mind falling behind the sudden out of nowhere question.
"Just.. humor me?"
Twilight bit her lip, pulling her gaze away from cyan, not sure exactly what to say. Her brain was still foggy from the wing draped securely over her back, from the closeness this sleeping bag was so easily warranting. The mare next to her was, whether she realized it or not, making it rather difficult to focus on anything that took more than half-brain power. "I-I.." Twilight sat up straighter, her back rubbing against the ever tightening cyan wing. "Why the sudden interest?"
"C'mon, Twi.." Rainbow shifted, it being her turn to stare deep into purple that was glancing off into darkness. "I guess.. I'm just curious? You seemed a bit hesitant when I asked earlier."
Twilight blinked the creeping sleep from her eyes, the mood raising conversation slowly waking her once tired consciousness more and more. "O-of course I was hesitant, Dash! Your question wasn't exactly an easy one to answer..!"
"How so?" Rainbow immediately interrogated back.
Twilight lit her horn, her purple glow lighting up their dark surroundings for a brief moment as an audible sigh escaped her lips. She floated the book that was irritatingly not in the way out of her space, the inanimate object being safely set to the side. "You're not going to let this go, are you?"
Rainbow kept silent, only keeping her eye contact firm and unblinking on Twilight's unblinking stare. Instead she made her response physical, a tight tug around Twilight's barrel from her wing currently holding her in place.
"F-fine..! It was, Celestia.."
Rainbow took in a sharp breath as she glared daggers into the mare currently under her wing. "Nuh-uh! Remember the rules? No lying, Twi.."
"I-I-I'm not-!" Twilight felt her breath catch in her throat, her lingering fear being exposed more and more by prismatic persistence. She could see the rainbow deadbolt holding the door closed in front of her blurred vision, now half unlocked and just out of reach as she stared at it through growing tears like a waterfall during a flash flood.
"Twilight, please? Just say what's trapped in that pretty little head of yours." Rainbow brought up one of her forelegs, poking Twilight gently on the forehead earning a surprised, cross-eyed look from the Alicorn. "I promise you'll feel better if you do." Rainbow stated, lowering her hoof while trying her hardest to hold back her own emotions.
Twilight turned to stare at the hypnotizing magenta pools staring directly at her. As much as she tried, she couldn't bring herself to look away anymore, the mirrored gems causing an instant explosion of pent-up anger, pain, and love to go off all at once inside her. It's not like she could escape anyway, the wing tightly wrapped around her was keeping her close to its owner like a lock with the key being thrown away long ago. Rainbow had her now, it was over and every fiber in her stationary body knew it.
"H-how lo.. long?!" Twilight stammered in a half scream, she didn't mean to, but it was hard not to. How emotions were such a frivolous thing, their only real value being the draw-back to reality it gave you when you were lost. Though she wasn't exactly angry at Rainbow, more-so at herself for how oblivious she was to it all.
Rainbow felt her head wince back slightly at the raised tone of a voice which was always so soothing, but she held her ground. "Since, uh, summer solstice..?" Rainbow hesitantly admitted. She watched as purple eyes grew wide, seemingly threatening to pop out of their sockets at the sudden revelation.
Rainbow tried her best to turn so she was center in her friend's stunned vision, cyan hoof connecting with purple chin in a whole-hearted attempt at keeping their eyes locked. "I-I never said anything because I didn't want to start something I couldn't finish." Rainbow bit her lip hard. "I.. I like you, Twilight, and I didn't want to mess this up. I didn't want to break a heart that I knew was fragile.."
"You knew..."
"W-what?" Rainbow pressed.
"You knew.. f-for months?"
"Twilight..?" Rainbow felt a single tear flow down her cheek, matching the already free flowing tears that were rolling down lavender.
"Why?!" Twilight let out, her shaking voice raising high in pitch once more.
Rainbow knew that word was going to surface eventually. The moment of truth behind the last few months of brewing emotions, the game she was so aptly a main character of coming to a swift and decisive end.
"Why?" Rainbow slowly put her unoccupied hoof on top of Twilight's outstretched hoof, an action that either didn't pull away from. She gingerly cleared her throat from the ball that was forming, their eyes never breaking contact. "Y'know, I asked myself that exact question a lot over the past months. It always ended up being the why, and never the why not." Rainbow dragged her hoof along with Twilight's so they were closer to combined center mass. "C'mon, egghead! You're a smart mare..! You're the perfect example of all the things I love, all bundled into a neat package. All you're missing is the cute little bow." Rainbow brought her hoof covering Twilight's to playfully poke her on the snout, earning a sniffling giggle in response.
"When I first saw you, first tackled you to the ground all those years ago, I knew something was there. It was faint back then and I didn't really think much of it, but it was always there. And over the years it grew and grew and I ignored it like the stupid filly I am, at least until a few months ago." Rainbow smiled warmly, wiping the build up of wetness from Twilight's cheeks.
"Now, I was completely oblivious to your feelings towards me. But the more I opened myself up to the thought of you, of us..? I.. I picked up on your feelings towards me pretty quickly, that very night at the Solstice party to be exact."
"And yeah.. I could have asked you right then and there, went through all the clichés like you're beautiful and out-going, but it didn't feel right at the time. Besides, those generic words don't really do you justice anyway." Rainbow let her tears flow free at this point, her only focus in Equestria being the equally sobbing mare now truly just out of reach. "Look, w-what I'm trying to say is.. I've had a lot of time to think about this, more time than I probably needed now that I look back, and I've come to realize that I don't like you for all your strengths or flaws.. Twilight Sparkle, I like you, for you."
The sudden silence that quickly fell over the fire-lit area was gut-wrenching. Rainbow found herself growing more and more impatient as she stared into the watery eyes of Twilight Sparkle for what felt like the last time, for an eternity. "Twilight? I.. I'm so sorr— MMmph?!"
Twilight swiftly cut off anything else Rainbow had to say as she took the leap of faith, connecting what was seemingly destined to be connected; for she didn't need to hear anything else come from those perfect lips. She kissed Rainbow with all the energy she had left, letting it explode into a fiery display of passion as she all-but completely shattered the prismatic deadbolt to her heart. She felt her entire body get twisted as she got rolled onto her back, a loud yelp escaping her currently occupied lips as the cyan mare rolled herself on top of her. Of course, she got no objections from her marefriend.
After all this time, all the mindless journeys she's went on only to return to do it again and again, this was the end result. Being bathed in both flame and moonlight alike, a connection of two souls finally seeing eye to eye, or heart to heart in this case. Being kissed by a mare who she knew would always be there for her, no matter where reality took them.
A fitting end, in her opinion, to a once absent-minded love story.