The Crystal Human

by PhoenixHorseGuy


Meeting the Sun / A Lesson in Human History / Equish 101

(Luna's POV)

"Are you certain, Tia?"

My sister nodded. "I am. With how much you've told me of this young man and his world, I think the time for me to meet him has come."

"But I thought you were waiting until you could meet him in person before introducing yourself?" I questioned her. It wasn't like her to push such an important meeting so far ahead.

Unless…

"You just want to unwind a little, don't you, sister?"

"… Okay, yes, but can you blame me?" She quickly admitted. "The nobles have been more insufferable than usual, I'm concerned about my student and niece, and I haven't taken a vacation in centuries." She visibly slumped down during her confession. "And you make his dreams sound so fun! Making an escape from creatures that should be dead? From the way you spoke about it, it was almost like you were a filly again."

"I understand, Tia." I gave my sister a nuzzle along her swan-like neck. Not that I would ever make that comparison out loud, of course. "I'm certain that I'll be able to get you in. But I'm warning Cadance and Shining first."

"That is perfectly understandable." She seemed to perk up at my response. "You're not going to warn your new friend?"

"I think it'll be a pleasant surprise for him." The two of us broke out into giggles as we parted ways and began making our ways to our respective bed chambers.

"Tonight is going to be interesting."


"Hello dream realm, my old friend. I've come to speak with you again." Those weren't the exact lyrics I got from Jackson’s mind on the first night we met, but I thought that they were fitting. Accessing the fabric of the dream realm itself, I took a quick look around.

"Shining and Cadance are both asleep, Tia is about to enter the dream realm. Jackson is… still awake?" That was odd. He was always asleep by now. At least, he has been since he first arrived here.

"I wonder what he's up to?"


(Jack’s POV)

Light pollution really fucked up my perspective of the night sky.

I was never into astronomy. That was always Cousin Rob's thing. Yet even I could admit that this, Equis' night sky, was the most beautiful I had ever seen.

Crazy to think that I can see it in its full majesty even when standing on a balcony in the middle of a medium-sized city. Though I'm sure the fact that there is no other civilization for God knows how many miles is helping out with that. Then I saw something I never thought I would see outside of pictures online.

Aurora Borealis.

At this time of night.

In this part of Equis.

Localized entirely within the night sky.

And it is so much more beautiful in person.

I wasn't sure how long I spent on that balcony just staring at the stars and the light show of greens, blues and purples, but I did know that it had been far too long. With a loud yawn, I turned my back to the night sky and stepped back into the confines of the castle. As I made my way back to my room, I couldn't shake the feeling that something was watching me.

"Probably just that spirit again." I dismissed the feeling pretty quickly. I obviously can't confirm it, but I'm certain that it's been following me around all day. It hasn't made any more attempts to possess me, thankfully, but I've still been a bit on edge about it since this morning.

"And it'll possess me when I go to sleep tonight. I wonder if it can look into my dreams? Eh, I'll ask Luna about it." Finally making it to my room, I open the door and step inside, making sure to close and lock it behind me. Taking off my boots and hoodie, I lay down and get ready for yet another night in a land of magic and adventure.


(Luna's POV)

"Are you sure you're not just overreacting, Lulu?" Tia asked for the umpteenth time tonight. I already gathered her, Shining and Cadance in a recreation of the hilltop from Jackson’s dream from last night, dinosaurs and all.

"Yes, I am positive sister." I began to pace back and forth. "It would be one thing if it was just a few minutes, but he is an entire hour and a half late!"

"Auntie Luna, you need to calm down." My niece advised. "So what if he decided to stay up a little late tonight? He could just be dealing with a little bit of insomnia."

"That is a perfectly fair point." And it just replaced my old concerns with a set of new ones. A friend of mine is having trouble sleeping, and I can't do anything about it!

"Maybe you should check again, sister." Tia advised me. "He might be asleep now."

"I already checked five minutes ago, Tia." I grumbled. Regardless, I decided to oblige her and connected to the fabric of the dream realm once more. "I highly doubt that… oh."

Tia gave me a small smile. It wasn't the same regal smile she gave everypony else though.

No, this was her knowing smile. Her 'I know I'm right' smile.

"'Oh'?" She asked innocently. "'Oh' what?"

"... He's just fallen asleep. Seems he hasn't started dreaming yet." That wasn't a concern. It always took a short while before anypony started dreaming, and Jackson had proven no different in that regard.

"So now we wait." Shining said. "At least those little green things aren't here."

Speak of the Windigoes and they shall appear, the Compys returned to torture Shining once more. I may or may not have played a small role in that.


(Jackson’s POV)

"Patrolling the Mojave almost makes you wish we were sent to the Rockies instead." The soldier next to me said, wiping the sweat from his brow.

"Well it's either this or let the Syndies in Chicago or the Longists in New Orleans take San Fran, and I would much prefer to keep democracy alive, thank you."

"You gotta be such a stick in the mud, Jack?"

"We're in the middle of a fucking civil war, Billy." I replied. "I apologize for not finding the humor in our situation."

"Hmph. What about you, David?" He asked our third patrol buddy.

"I think we should be marching east and ending the war." He flatly replied. "Hell, I'll go over to Atlanta and take care of the Constitutionalists myself if I have to."

"The black man wants to kill the segregationists. How surprising." Billy sarcastically remarked.

"And you don't?" David and I questioned at the same time.

"It sounds like a fun time." I added. "I would more than love to put a bullet between the eyes of those neo-confederate bastards."

"Of course you would, Mr. 'I voted for George Norris'." Before I could come up with a response to Billy's jab, David shut the both of us up.

"Do you two see that?" He questioned, his gaze going up to the sky.

"See what?" I asked, my gaze following his upwards.

"Is that… is that something in the sun?" Billy questioned. Sure enough, there was something in the sun, but none of us could see what it was very clearly. It had wings, and a long protrusion coming out of the top of its head, but that’s all I could make out.

"Is it an angel?" David asked.

"Either that or we're about to collapse from heat stroke." Billy replied. As the shape got closer, I realized that it was equine in nature.

"That… is that an alicorn?" I questioned.

"A what?" David turned to me.

"An alicorn. But…" Let's see, she's coming out of the sun. Does that mean…

"Boys, I think I know who our visitor is."

"Well don't keep us in suspense. Who is it?" Billy excitedly asked.

"Luna's older sister." At the confused looks from my colleagues, I turned my attention back to who I assumed to be the Solar Sister.

"Celestia!" I called out. "Luna's told me a lot about you! Did you really need to go with something so generic for your entrance?!"

The dream seemed to freeze around me as Celestia halted her descent. It was now that the other ponies stepped out of their hiding spots and the Mojave faded away around me, with me still in military uniform.

"Hey Luna." I said. "So, was I right about my guess?"

"You were." She replied. "How did you figure it out so quickly?"

"Alicorn coming out of the sun? You mentioned that you had a sister who moved the sun and governed the kingdom during the day. I figured that it was the most logical conclusion."

"That it was." A new voice said from behind me. Turning, I saw a white alicorn towering over me, coming in at roughly seven feet tall. Her long neck reminded me of that of a swan, and her horn was easily the length of my arm. "It is nice to see Luna making friends with such intelligent creatures."

"I assure you, your highness, I am incredibly stupid." I jokingly said while holding out my hand. "Jackson Brunner, though I'm sure you already knew that."

She grasped my hand in her hoof and shook it. "Princess Celestia, but I'm sure you already knew that." She blatantly stole my joke. "But you can drop the titles. I know you've already done so for every other royal you've met."

"That I have. Though it helps you don't act much like the royals back home." I doubt I would be able to just walk up to Charles in London and have a casual conversation with the guy about my day. With Luna, Cadance and Shining, that was pretty much every night.

"I'm sure it does." The Mojave desert reformed itself around us, though David and Billy were still nowhere to be found. "So is this desert your home?"

"Nope. I live on the opposite of the continent. This is just another work of fiction from my world." I replied, taking a seat on a nearby boulder that I'm fairly certain wasn't there before.

"I see." Was Celestia's only reply. "And what is it called?"

"Kaiserredux. It's a modification for a popular game back home. Based off of another popular modification for the same game. Kaiserreich, that one is called." I grabbed the canteen I had strapped to my belt and took a swig out of it before continuing.

"It's an alternate history thing. About if the Germans won the First World War. Right now, we're in the middle of the Second American Civil War. Pacific States territory, going off of where we are and the flag patch on my shoulder." I tapped it with my finger, drawing attention to the white, red and yellow tricolor on my shoulder. A trio of red stars and a bear both being prominently featured on it.

"I'm sorry, but… 'First World War'?" Luna questioned. She looked slightly concerned.

"Yup. The first. There were only two, and both were well before my time." That statement seemed to calm her somewhat.

"Were they truly global wars?" Luna asked.

"Well, there was fighting of some sort on every continent during both. So I would say yes."

"How many?" Celestia questioned. "How many lost their lives during these wars?"

"Well… how many ponies live in Equestria? Just for comparisons sake."

"About seven million, as of the last census."

"Nine million during the first war. Fifteen million during the second." I decided to leave out civilian casualties. I was not in the mood to describe the holocaust to them right now.

"And they were all human?" Celestia asked, to which I nodded. Then Celestia did something unexpected.

She sat on the rock next to me, stretched out her wing, and hugged me with it.

"Um… what are you doing?"

She didn't respond at first, instead choosing to nuzzle my hair. When she finally spoke, her voice seemed to be filled with sorrow.

"You poor thing… no race of creatures should ever have to witness such death and destruction. Especially not amongst their own kind."

I wasn't sure how to respond to that, so I looked to Luna for help. She seemed to be more focused on her own internal thoughts at the moment, so I looked to Shining and Cadance. The former seemed equally as surprised as I was about the situation I had found myself in, while the latter was more like Luna; lost in thought, trying to imagine two entire Equestrias being wiped out in a single war.

Now I'm glad I didn't count the civilian casualties.

"I mean, like I said. It was before my time. The wounds on our society have healed." Not fully, admittedly, but they're at a point where I can at least say they have without feeling like I'm lying through my teeth.

"It does not change the fact that it happened." Celestia insisted. "Our first war against Sombra occurred over a thousand years ago, yet we still do our best to remember the ponies who had fallen during that conflict."

I heard someone clearing her throat. "Sister, perhaps it is best if we get off the topic of history for the night?" Luna suggested.

"No. No, it's fine." I said. "I was planning on bringing that up anyways. Transparency, you know?" Finished the hypocrite- I mean me. Then an idea came to mind. "How about I show you something that's gonna blow your minds and lighten the mood a little?"

Celestia finally released me from the feathery cocoon she held me in and looked at me in curiosity. "Oh? And what do you have in mind?"

"It's simple, really." I stand up and walk over to Luna. "But as always when it comes to the dream realm, I'll need your sister's help with this." I called over my shoulder.

To say that I had piqued Celestia's interest was an understatement.


Ah, my living room. A familiar sight. It was almost like I was back home.

Almost. There was a large white alicorn sitting in my recliner, a dark blue one sitting in an exact copy of said recliner, and a pink alicorn and white unicorn sitting on my sofa, keeping the rightmost seat empty.

As for me, I was no longer dressed in late 1930's military garb, but instead much more casual clothing; A white t-shirt and a pair of black pants. Can never go wrong with a classic.

"Right. So I'm sure you're wondering why I gathered you all here today." I started.

"You said that you would 'blow our minds' and have refused to elaborate." Celestia reminded everyone in the dream room. "I hope you weren't speaking literally."

"What? Of course not!" I said, casually throwing the Anti-Materiel rifle that appeared in my hands out the window into nothingness. "Thanks, Luna."

"So Cadance, remember when I told you about movies?" I asked the pink alicorn

"Yeah. You said they were like plays, but you could watch them at any time." She then brightened up. "Ooooo are we about to watch one?"

"Of sorts." She gave me a confused tilt of the head. "You see, we're about to watch something called a 'video' which is like a short movie. This one is about nineteen minutes long and is very famous."

"What's it about?" Luna asked, genuinely interested in whatever I was about to say.

"The history of the entire world." Before any of them could respond, I pulled out my phone, which I had connected to the TV behind me earlier, and hit play on the video on screen. Was all of that necessary? No, but I wanted to go for an authentic experience.

"Hi, you're on a rock, floating in space. Pretty cool, right?"


"By the way, where are we?" Were the final words of one Mr. Wurtz as the ending card to one of the most famous videos of all time appeared on screen.

Overall, I would say that exposing the ponies to Bill Wurtz went well. I did have to pause so that I could clarify some things every now and then, and I noticed that each pony took interest in different things.

First was Celestia, who was interested in humanities technological advances. Particularly the radio. As it turns out, it did exist here, but it was only popular with nobility and some of the richer non-noble ponies in cities like Fillydelphia and Manehattan at the moment. When I told her that the radio had not only seen mass adoption, but had also been surpassed in popularity by TV and the internet back on Earth, that seemed to fascinate her even more.

Next was Cadance, who took particular interest in the 'South Africa might need a moment to think about it' joke Bill made when it came to racism. That lead to a pretty ugly discussion about Segregation and Apartheid. It was, unfortunately, not a new concept for her or the other ponies in the dream room. Cadance worked as an ambassador for a few years to some of the Griffon Territories, and in one of them, Longsword, they practiced a similar system up until that nation's collapse into civil war. Some of the specific details were different, but the overall gist was the same.

Then came Shining, who wanted to know more about humanities weapons and an explanation for the 'pacific showdown' joke. He seemed apprehensive about the idea of a single bomb being capable of wiping out an entire city. He also seemed appalled that humanity would willingly go to such lengths as to wipe out an entire city to end a war in the first place.

"We're good at war, and the only reason we're good at it is because we've had a lot time to practice." Was the reasoning I gave him.

Finally came Luna, who, unsurprisingly, wanted to know more about the space race and humanities exploits in her domain. I told her of Yuri Gagarin and Vostok 1, then Neil Armstrong and the Apollo 11 mission, then the Voyager probes, finally ending off at the ISS and the rovers on Mars.

"So there's an entire space station where humans from all over the world stay in year round?" Luna asked.

"Pretty much, yeah. If you wanna get super technical, each crew only stays up there for six months at the time, but it is populated year round."

"Fascinating. And to think such an idea is mere science fiction here in Equestria."

"You can learn a lot from our history." I said. "Both from our successes and our mistakes. We've done a lot of really fucked up shit, but we've also done a lot of good things. We've done things that seemed like good ideas at the time that ended up being bad for us in the long run, and vice versa. Or well, that's how I like to look at history. A mix of both good and bad, and very rarely can any one event be described as purely one or the other."

"That's always a good way to look at it. Are you sure you were a cashier back home?" Celestia asked.

"If I wasn't, then 7/11 wouldn't have been paying me for showing up there almost everyday to do just that." Came my sarcastic reply.

"Yes, of course. It's just… the way you speak about your species and it's past… you sound more like a philosopher or historian. One who has been in school for many years."

"Never heard that one before." I truthfully admitted. "I've always been a bit of a history nerd, I read a lot when I was younger, still do. And I was saving up money to head to college to get a degree in it before landing here."

"You could continue your education here in Equestria." Luna offered. "It wouldn't be hard to get you into the E.E.A's registry as an exchange student of some sort. And we could cover all the costs for you."

I'll admit, Luna's offer sounded tempting. Very tempting, in fact. I mean, here is the diarch of an entire country offering to cover my college expenses while I get my degree.

But it didn't sit right with me. Should I really be exploiting her kindness like this? I didn't want to use her or Equestria's Treasury as my personal piggy bank.

"I'll… I'll think about it." I finally said. "We can figure out education, and how I'm going to pay for it, later. After Sombra, and after I learn Equish." Speaking of…

"Think you four can teach me a few basic phrases? Greetings, goodbyes, run for your life cause we're gonna die if you don't. You know, stuff like that?"

Most of the ponies around me didn't react much to my question. Most of them. Celestia reacted by plastering a manic, predatory and almost demonic smile.

"Uh… should I be concerned about that?" I asked.

"Absolutely." Cadance replied. "But just know that you brought this on yourself."

With that ominous warning, I turned back to Celestia to find she was now talking with Luna, the two of them summoning small rectangul-

"Those are textbooks. Textbooks on language if I had to assume."

"You know, on second thought, maybe we could hold off on this for a bit? I mean, the broken charades have been working well enough so far, and-" A dark blue hoof to my mouth halted my objections in their tracks.

"Oh, but Jack, you gave my sister such a generous offer!" Luna began, a smile on her face the whole time. "She has been pining for a new student to teach since Twilight Sparkle moved to Ponyville, and you have just given her the opportunity to teach somepony else her near infinite knowledge!" Her very grandiose speech ended with the removal of her hoof from her mouth. I took that opportunity to speak my mind.

"I don't remember agreeing to this, Luna."

"I know. But listen. What I said about her pining and wanting to teach somepony else is true. When I saw how she reacted to you wanting to learn Equish… I saw an opportunity to do a good thing for my sister."

"I can understand that, but-"

"I'll be here to watch over your lessons with Tia to make sure she doesn't go overboard." Luna interrupted me. "And we both know you'll have to learn Equish eventually. Why not get the basics down as soon as possible?"

… Okay. I'll admit that her argument was a reasonable one. "Ok, fine. I'll go along with this. But next time you have a plan that involves me you tell me ahead of time instead of throwing me in the deep end. Alright?"

"That is a perfectly reasonable request. I accept these conditions." Good, because they weren't optional. She looked over her shoulder, the smile returning to her muzzle. "Just in time as well. Tia is ready."

Looking behind Luna, I saw that she had knocked down a wall and built a small classroom there, with a blackboard and a single desk that looked fit for a pony and not a human. "Um, Celestia? Mind if I make one small change?" I said, leaning over the too short chair. Once she realized what I was referring to, she nodded. With Luna's assistance, the chair and desk took on the proper proportions for a human. Taking my seat, I prepared myself for what could possibly be either a great boon or the worst learning experience in my life.

Only time will tell, I suppose.


(Celestia's POV)

"It wasn't what I was expecting, but I still had a lot of fun." Despite my initial fears and his reluctance early on, Jackson proved to be an excellent student. One of the best I've had in years, I could say. While Luna insisted that it was in part due to the knowledge going straight into his subconscious mind, thus allowing him to absorb it faster, I like to believe that he would have done just as well in the waking world.

Unfortunately, I had to end the lesson early due to my duties. I may love teaching, but I am still responsible for raising the sun every morning. That always took priority over everything else. When I went to raise the sun this morning, however, something was wrong.

The moon was still high in the sky.

I knew Luna said that she would take a moment longer to speak with Jackson about something, but she was never late for our daily ritual.

Concern was quick to override the rest of my thoughts, but before I could act upon it I watched the moon set below the horizon. Taking that as my cue, I quickly rose the sun.

Perhaps I was a little too quick. My work this morning was rushed and sloppy by comparison to yesterdays sunrise. It looked more like the work of me back when I was a filly and first learning how to use my magic all of those years ago. Still, the job was done, and I wasn't particularly concerned about how it was done. Right now, I was far more concerned about my little sister.

Getting to Luna's wing of the castle was an easy enough process, if not a little time consuming. By the time I got the hallway that Luna's bedroom door was located in, I saw my sister step out of it. We locked eyes for a brief moment before she trotted over to me, closing her door behind her.

"Good morning, sister. And to what do I owe the visit?" Luna questioned.

"I was just concerned is all. You're never late to lower the moon. Why were you this time?" I asked as the two of us made our way to the dining hall.

"Jack has… informed me of a spirit that has been stalking him and occasionally possessing him." She began. "I fear it may have malicious intentions, or that it may have been looking into his dreams. I didn't sense its presence last night, but…"

"But you fear it may have managed to slip in without you noticing before?" I finished for her.

"Yes." She nodded. "I'm going to be keeping a closer eye on it, so we can confirm whether or not it has been doing so."

"Is there anything we can do about it?"

"Unless Jack can somehow convince it to stop, then no." Then an idea came to her mind. "But… we might be able to get information out of it if we can trap it in Jack's dreamscape. Figure out what it wants."

"But are you sure that's safe?" I asked. "We don't wish to make an enemy out of a potential friend by harming them unintentionally."

"Are you speaking of Jack or the spirit?"

"Both."

"Regardless, you have nothing to fear, sister. I might be rusty, but I've done this sort of thing before." My little sister said with the most confidence I've heard from her since before her banishment. "I'll speak with Jack about it tomorrow night while making sure the spirit is unaware of what we are planning." She finished as we entered the dining hall and took our usual seats.

"Well that’s good." The rest of our breakfast went uneventfully, with the only topics being paperwork and the nobles continued blockage of our military reinforcements for Shining and Cadance. Times like these, I almost wish that I listened to that group of ponies who wanted to get rid of the Noble Council seven hundred years ago.

It was when Luna was leaving that she said something I should have been expecting.

"I'll be sure to tell Jack that you'll be joining us again tonight!" She called out as she left the dining hall, not giving me a chance to respond to her comment.