"Almost all records of The Days of Chaos were either destroyed for fun by Discord himself, or given life through his chaos and where subsequently lost when he was sealed in stone. The Princess have done their level best to recall what had happened during that time of strife for the historians to record but the unfortunate fact of the matter is that there was just too much happening at once for any single Pony to remember. (Addendum: Even when Princess Luna was returned to us she could only give scant few details that differed from what Princess Celestia already provided.)"
-Look Back, The Days of Chaos, printed 1970 by the Equestrian Press.
When Stalwart woke up to his garden embroiled in a war between the vegetables and the fruit, the polka-dotted ground and loud arguing from downstairs he contemplated if leaving bed was even worth it. That is, until the arguing turned into crashing and he knew if he didn't get up he wouldn't have The Sleeping Alicorn anymore. So with a great groan he heaved himself up and stalked to the door and stairwell beyond, ready to give the assailants of his already tiring morning a piece of his mind.
'I have never been more glad for the wards and staves that I spent the better part of a month setting up.' Stalwart thought to himself, absent-mindedly casting an examination spell to check that said wards and staves were still functioning. 'Sure they won't survive a direct interaction with Discord, but the web of compounding effects seems to holding up against the passive chaos.' With a satisfied flourish Stalwart pumped more power into a failing Notice-Me-Not charm and redrew some runes that had faded against the eroding passage of time.
Stalwart's concentration was broken when the ruckus from downstairs had stopped, and an eerie silence was left in it's wake. Years of training kept him alert to any danger that could be beyond the door he had stopped in front of. Taking a breath a prepare himself Stalwart slowly inched the door open to take a peek at what awaited him on the other side. But before he had even opened it enough to see more than a sliver of the main room the door was seized by an invisible force and flung open, that same force dragging him out into the open with the sound of party favors and trumpets.
Stalwart managed to keep his composure and not cry out from the loud noise that seemed to come from every direction, but he couldn't keep his balance at the same time, causing him to trip over his own hooves and fall in a heap at the hoof and paw of the one being he feared the most. "Greetings Wonder Knight! Did you miss Moi?" before Stalwart could scramble to his hooves and grab something to defend himself, the entirety of his vision was filled with the wide grin of the Patchwork Monster. With a shout of surprise Stalwart managed to back peddle and turn toward where he kept his weapons only to see his adversary inexplicably there, lounging across the booths with a glass of some bubbling liquid.
Stalwart quickly cast his gaze around the room and noticed in his panic that all seemed untouched for now, and levied his best glare at the Lord of Chaos before him despite his pounding heart or lack thereof. "Discord. It seems as though every enemy from mine and the princesses past are showing up one after another." Stalwart drew himself up from a hunch to his full height as Discord turned over onto his stomach, arms curled up under his chin and legs kicking with a bemused expression. "Why have you come here? You abhor the Princesses more than you do me." At this point Stalwart had made his way behind the bar's counter, rummaging around with his magic for something strong to get through this nonsensical interaction now that he realized he was in no danger. When Stalwart turned back to his enemy Discord was no where to be found, until he saw the Draconeques behind his counter wearing a vest and bowtie using using a shaker to apparently make his own drink. He rolled his eyes at Discord's antics and turned away from the Draconeques, secure in the knowledge that he was not Discord's primary concern so he and his establishment would survive for now.
"Think of it as a sign of respect," Said the Draconeques, opening the mixer to release a deluge of rainbow colored bubbles. "You were the only mortal to stand up to me during my reign, and even then you honored the rules I set for our engagement. Not like your precious Princesses. And I may be Chaos incarnate but even I can honor that." Discord then reached into the mixer up to his elbow and pulled out a length of oily black liquid, which he then sniffed at before throwing it over his shoulder. Stalwart watched as the black liquid came to life and somehow crawled it's way out of the room, before Discord grabbed his attention again by wrapping his lion paw around Stalwart's shoulders. "So I came here to propose a deal."
Stalwart immediately stiffened up as Discord spoke, quickly extricating himself from the Draconeques' hold to glare at him with nothing but mistrust, idly noting that Discord's drink had taken on a bright, almost neon tint. "Forgive me for not trusting you at your word Discord," Stalwart's tone heavy with sarcasm as Discord just grinned toothily. "But deals are not to be made with devils." Again Stalwart's eyes slid over to the display case where he kept his weapons and only now noticed they had gone missing, the glass unharmed except for three distinctly pony shaped holes. "Not to mention that you have done something to my armaments as well."
"Oh please," Discord waved his claw as he somehow batted away the words themselves, and Stalwart suddenly had the wind knocked out of him. As he wheezed Discord continued. "You know as well as I that those three only tolerate each other at best." Here Discord's eyes gained a cruel glint, his grin becoming a smirk as well while Stalwart got his breath back. "If anything I'm doing you a favor, you faced me without them so I thought they could use a reminder." As Discord threw his head back to laugh Stalwart put down the bottle of spirits he had lifted, suddenly too uncomfortable to drink. Even still, Stalwart realized that Discord had avoided his question.
"That was one the rules you had set for our fight, If you could even call it one." At that Discord, after his laughter had died down, nodded sagely, his beard suddenly long enough to trail on the floor as he stroked it, every bit playing the part of the old wise man. "Know that I have faith in Moonstone, Blaze, and Aegis. They know how to work together when it counts." 'I hope.' he added mentally. The draconeques gave Stalwart an amused look, as if he could read his thoughts. There was a muted boom from the shaker in his claw before it bloomed outward like a flower, the inside coated with a thick, viscous sludge.
"Oh but you know perfectly well how my games work Wonder Knight." He snaked his head down the Stalwart's level his piercing gaze rooting the Reanent stallion in place. "Can you honestly say that all three of them will be able to follow the rules?" Stalwart held the mismatched being's gaze for only a few seconds before looking away with a heavy sigh, unwilling to lie to a being far more powerful than himself. "I'm glad to see your not blinded by friendship like Celestia's precious Elements of Harmony." Discord, with all the smugness of the cat who got the canary poured his strange glowing drink into an absurdly long champagne flute with the curliest straw imaginable. Stalwart was fairly sure that it curved inside out at some points.
Stalwart took a moment to decide how much of his own thoughts to reveal to the Trickster God. "I... Cannot. I may hope but neither you nor I can see the future Discord." Discord just gave Stalwart a devious grin as he took a sip of whatever chaotic concoction he created. Stalwart watched him for a moment before gesturing over to the display cases. "On the subject of my weapons, what exactly have you done to them? I couldn't help but notice the comedically placed holes."
Discord opened one eye as everything, even the liquid in his straw, stopped before reversing as he placed it down to cast a critical eye over the ruined glass. "I'm insulted Wonder Knight, I would never do something so, so... Boring!" With a snap from his claw and a flash of light Discord was suddenly in front of the broken glass, observing it with an almost disgusted look in his eyes. "ugh. No class at all." With another snap of the paw the empty space in the glass rapidly shrunk before stopping at a third of their original size, where the empty silhouettes came to life and began to prance and play together.
"There much better. And look! Such an improvement over it's previous occupants." With his Work done Discord laid back in the air as he glided over to his drink again. Once the Draconeques had reclaimed his prize he turned that burning gaze onto Stalwart again, the stallion flinching slightly. "To answer your question my favorite adversary, I simply gave them a... New perspective so to say. Around your eye level in fact."
Stalwart took a moment to process what Discord had said before a deep groan was torn from his throat. "I was afraid of that." Stalwart raised his gaze upward to Discord's gleeful grin. "So the fighting I heard earlier..?"
"That indeed was those three's adorable attempt to stop yours truly, with bodies they only had for mere moments!" Here Discord threw his head back yet again as a deep booming laugh erupted out from him. "They could barely stand let alone fight, I do believe they caused more damage than I did!"
As Discord fell back with even greater peals of laughter Stalwart looked around his establishment once again, noticing for the first time the couple of knocked over tables and smashed glasses scattered across the ground. His eyes then dropped to the floor where the glossed wood had been scraped and ruined below the cases and was able to admit to himself that yeah, they really had caused more lasting damage than Discord himself.
"Oh come on," Stalwart grumbled to himself, sending out his telekinetic grasp to right the tables and bring him a broom. "I just applied a scratch resistant charm over the floor!" Discord's laughter had died down to occasional giggles as he lay draped over the barstools, until he heard Stalwart's complaint then the laughter started to bubble up again as he pointed above Stalwart's head.
"Then you should avoid looking at the ceiling then. One of them took to her wings quick enough to fly, but not well enough to avoid crashing repeatedly." At the sound of Discord's warning Stalwart stopped cleaning for a moment before pointedly avoiding looking upwards as he turned to look at Discord.
"Your not going to leave until we make that deal aren't you?" Discord merely smirked as he resumed drinking his absurd beverage, causing Stalwart the drag a hoof down his muzzle. "Alright, fine. Let's hear your deal."
"Splendid!" With sudden roaring applause from nowhere Discord spun his claw above his head where it ignited with a blue flame then brought into down in front of Stalwart's muzzle, the blue flames radiating no heat and smelling strongly of ozone. "My deal is as follows, you and I shall play another game with stakes. Last time was a test of your mental strength and a repeat performance would be incredibly trite, of course. So this time around I have something much more entertaining in mind." Here a cruel and almost sadistic smile curled across his face. "Celestia's little Bearers are the main characters of this grand show, so why not give them a REAL challenge? You will face them in combat Wonder Knight, but not with the intention to succeed, no. All you shall do is silently defend. No speaking, and no magic. Or I shall deal with them myself. Deal?"
Stalwart gathered enough of his courage to defiantly meet the draconeques' gaze with a glare. "This is you giving them a fair chance is it? You are far too cruel for me to allow the other outcome."
Discord let out a sound of disgust, his lip curling higher. "Your chivalry is nauseating, I cannot wait to see you break those mares spirits as they throw their all at you to no avail. There is nothing more devastating than an enemy that does not take you seriously." Discord gave a overexaggerated wink that caused Stalwart's glare to intensify, his green aura beginning to flare around his horn.
In Stalwart's fury he lost concentration on keeping the old dialect out of his voice, creating a strange dichotomy with his modern words. "Daemon, thy evil know no bounds. I accept, cur." Stalwart kept his glare on the Patchwork Monster's eyes as he shook the devil's claw, feeling a lock settling on his throat and horn as his voice and magic were sealed away. Discord's evil smile grew larger still once the deal had been struck, and as he scooped up Stalwart Shield to whisk him away to the battle field his final remark echoed in the empty bar once they had left.
"Let the Games begin!"