//------------------------------// // Chapter 46 // Story: The Siren // by McPoodle //------------------------------// Just outside the Palace. An hour before Discord’s awakening. “Into the Gala” “Meet new friends” “Into the Gala” “Sell some apples” “Into the Gala” “Find my Prince” “Prove I’m great” “As a Wonderbolt is” “To meet!” “To sell!” “To find!” “To prove!” “To woop!” “To talk!” “Into the Gala Into the Gala And we’ll have the best night ever! At the Gala!” “Yeah!” Spike exclaimed as the heart-song concluded. “This is gonna be the best night ever. You know why? ‘Cause we’re all gonna spend time at the Gala to…” He looked around, to find himself alone. “…gether. Or not.” “Well, what are we supposed to do?” asked an abandoned Apple Bloom. Each of the invited guests at the Gala were allowed to bring a “Plus One”. Rarity and Applejack had brought their younger sisters. They in turn had convinced Rainbow Dash to bring the president of her fan club, Scootaloo, also known as the third member of the infamous Cutie Mark Crusaders. To the disgust of these three, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon had talked Twilight and Fluttershy into bringing them. And Pinkie Pie had brought Twist. Twist had brought a large quantity of potions in her saddlebags and from the moment they had arrived had been placing and uncorking the little bottles near congregations of ponies. Spike hadn’t brought anybody and was rather disappointed that nopony asked him to be his guest. “Oh, some more fillies!” A slate-blue pegasus stallion with a slate-black mane and tail came into view. His cutie mark appeared to be a pair of portable chalkboards, but it wavered just a bit if you stared at it for too long. Luckily for him, nopony had actually done that yet. “I’m Tabula Rasa, the designated foalsitter.” Apple Bloom gave him a long intense look, one that Tabula felt went right through him. Twist by contrast got excited when she saw him, like she recognized him. She ran up and put an uncorked potion bottle near him, then ran back. Thorax nervously turned away from both of them to look at the other fillies. Diamond and Silver meanwhile groaned in unison. “Are you actually telling me that we’ve managed to get into the Grand Galloping Gala, and we don’t even get to go into the Gala?” The former asked. Tabula shrugged helplessly. “Sorry, I don’t make the rules. However, you do get free reign in the Royal Gardens, and those are quite nice.” “It’s OK, Mr. Rasa,” Sweetie Belle said. “I’m sure we’ll find something to do.” Twist turned from looking at him to looking around her uncomfortably, trying now—like Tabula—to stay out of Apple Bloom’s sight. “And don’t forget that there are plenty of other fillies and colts for you to play with,” Tabula added. “Many of them belonging to quite important families.” “But I wanted to go to the Gala,” Diamond Tiara pouted. “Now hold on,” Silver Spoon said, thinking. “Mr. Rasa here said there were important ponies being foal-sat. We might be able to make some contacts.” “Hmm…,” said Diamond. “I think I see where you’re going. Lead the way, Mr. Rasa.” “Excuse me,” Spike said, tapping the stallion’s leg to get his attention. “Why hello there, little…” Tabula began to say, before he got a good look at the little guy getting his attention. “Hey you’re not a pony!” “No, I’m not,” Spike said. “I’m a dragon.” “A dragon!” Tabula exclaimed. “Are…are you supposed to be foal-sat as well?” “No,” Spike lied. “I can take care of myself.” Tabula stood there, carefully weighing his options: He could force Spike to stay with the others, but that would mean he would be responsible when the creature he knew nothing about did something he couldn’t handle. Or he could go the “Spike? Never heard of him,” route. And Tabula considered himself a much better liar than Spike. “OK, if you say so,” he finally replied. “That’s great! I was just going to ask, though…were you named after the Daring Do character Tabula Rasa?” “You read Daring Do?” Tabula asked excitedly. “I love that series. And…so did my mother. Which is why that’s my name.” He looked quite a bit nervous about this last part. Because as a matter of fact he wasn’t a better liar than Spike. “You do know that the fictional Tabula was a mare, right?” The stallion Tabula laughed nervously. “Yeah, funny story…” “Look, are we going to this playground or not?” Diamond Tiara butted in, saving Tabula’s hide. “Oh! Yup, we’re…on a schedule!” Tabula declared. “Come along, fillies!” Spike watched as the group were led around the side of the palace and out of sight. Then he sighed. Once again, he was alone. He looked silently at Canterlot Palace for a few minutes, and then he made up his mind and began to walk away, towards the city of Canterlot. “Psst!” hissed a snake in the grass nearly. Or maybe it was Rarity, hiding in the bushes. “Rarity!” he exclaimed, running over and peering into the bush to get a better look at her. “Shh!” “What are you doing there?” he asked. “Please be quiet,” Rarity pleaded, in a reasonable approximation of Fluttershy’s usual volume level. “I’ve made a horrible mistake!” “What do you mean?” “I’m at the biggest social event of the year!” Rarity declared, forgetting to keep her voice low. “This place will be filled to overflowing with…Perfect Moments.” Spike looked at the half-hidden unicorn for a moment as if she had lost her mind. Then he remembered the dark secret she had confided to the others. He looked around him carefully in thought. “Stick with me,” he finally said, hesitantly. Rarity stood up and looked down at him, certain that this was yet another ploy by the dragon to make a move on her. “And how will that protect me from Perfect Moments?” she asked. “This is Canterlot,” he explained, a note of sadness in his voice. “Nopony other than Twilight or Princess Celestia ever treated me like a pony here. So, there’s no way that anypony is going to have a good time while I’m around.” “Oh,” said Rarity, somewhat shocked. Then she thought a bit. “Oooh, Spikey-wikey, that’s horrible!” She picked him up and cuddled him. And then stopped herself before she triggered a “Perfect Moment” for Spike. Putting him down she said, “Why don’t you give me that tour that Twilight promised?” She looked through a window into the audience chamber, where Twilight was trying to squeeze her way through an impossibly large crowd of ponies to reach Princess Celestia. “I suspect that she won’t be able to get to it tonight.” “Alright,” Spike said, leading Rarity to the edge of a still pool of water. “But first, you might want to freshen up.” Rarity took one look at herself, and nearly fainted. Her mane was a mess, and the bushes had done irreparable damage to her dress. She fixed her mane quickly with her magic and started on the dress, until… “No,” she said decisively. “I’ll use this as extra insurance against Perfect Moments.” Spike lifted a torn corner of the dress and looked sadly up at her. “Hey, do you have any warning signs for us to look out for? A demonic glint in your eyes…?” “As a matter of fact, I do have the most indescribable feeling a couple seconds before I steal a memory. I call it ‘opening my third eye’.” “Alright,” Spike said calmly, as he tried to deal with that bizarre description. “I’ll be sure to let you know if I happen to see you with one too many ocular organs.” “Princess Celestia? Where’s your sister?” Twilight asked, somewhere between the twenty-fifth and thirtieth pony to kiss the Princess’ hoof. “Oh, she’s patrolling the dreams of Canterlot’s fillies and colts,” Celestia replied. “She used the excuse of Cadance’s non-appearance to pull one herself.” “Did I hear you correctly?” The Countess of Bellweather before them said. “Are you actually letting Nightmare Moon have her way with the dreams of my precious daughter?” “She’s reformed!” Twilight pleaded. “I…the Elements of Harmony completely removed the evil that was inside her.” The countess looked up from Twilight to Celestia, with the clear expression of “Fillies—how incredibly naïve!” “In my experience, once a pony falls victim to Evil, they can never more be trusted. You should banish her back to the—” And then the countess saw the expression on the Princess’ face, and stepped aside just in time, as the potted plant behind her burst into flames. That silenced the whole party…for about two seconds. “You reach your right hoof in; you reach your right hoof out!” sang Pinkie Pie. And that got everypony to pay attention to her instead. “Are…are you alright, Princess?” Twilight asked. Celestia put a hoof to her temple, wincing in pain. “It’s alright,” she said slowly. “Just a sudden headache.” “Do you need to step outside?” Celestia put on a false smile, calming down the ponies that had been quietly watching the whole interaction. “No, I’ll be fine,” she lied. “You wanted to meet Prince Blueblood?” Spike asked incredulously. “Why, do you know him?” Rarity asked gayly as she allowed herself to be led around the periphery of the greens, fairly far from any other pony. “Wait, you seem to know everypony in Canterlot,” she said in realization. “Do you know Prince Blueblood? Could you introduce me?” She then shook her head rapidly. “No! No, I don’t want to meet him. What if he has a Perfect Moment? What if I have a Perfect Moment? Would I steal my own memories?” This caused her rapid patter of speech to halt. “How would that even work?” Spike looked up at her incredulously. He loved Rarity, he truly loved her. But sometimes she could be so weird. “No, I think this will work great. Just…don’t get mad at me, OK? I’m just trying to rip the old bandage off of the fur.” Rarity looked down at him curiously. “I’m going to trust you in this, Spike. Don’t let me down.” “That’s not going to be me!” Spike said lightly as he sped back towards the palace, his claw locked around Rarity’s pastern as she tried desperately to keep up. In a few moments, they had reached Prince Blueblood, who was standing serenely looking out over (Twilight’s) mountainside. He looked exactly as Rarity had pictured him. She tried in vain to fix up her hopeless dress before she was noticed, but it was too late. “Well, hello,” the prince said pleasantly, then stopped as he took in what he saw. He stopped when he spotted Spike. “Ah, Spike. This must be your guest. I am Prince Blueblood.” Unable to help herself, Rarity blushed. “I am…Rarity,” she introduced herself. Right next to them was a bush with one perfect flower on it. The next part of her fantasy. She looked down at Spike for advice. Having seen where her eyes had rested, he silently encouraged her to continue. “Oh my,” she finally said, “what a lovely rose.” She closed her eyes as she waited to have that rose placed in her mane. “You mean…this rose?” she heard the prince say. “Thank you. It goes with my eyes.” Rarity opened her own eyes, to see that the prince had placed the perfect rose…on his own lapel. She looked incredulously down at Spike, who smirked and nodded back at her. She looked back and forth between the two males. She had an idea, but she had to test it. Looking around, she saw a spot on the sidewalk ahead with an ugly mud puddle. So, she walked right up to it….and the prince had her put her own cloak over the puddle so he could walk delicately across. “I…see,” she said after this distasteful display. “You’re a cad.” The prince prepared himself for the slap…but it never came. “I beg your pardon?” “You’re a cad!” Rarity exclaimed gleefully. “Oh Spike, this is perfect! In that nothing Perfect could possibly happen around him!” “I beg your pardon?” Blueblood lamely repeated. “We are going to have a blast!” Rarity exclaimed, not caring anymore what she said. She trotted off across the green, with Spike at her hooves. “A what?” Blueblood asked. He followed lamely after the other two. I should clarify that this is Prince Blueblood, and not a changeling replacement. The party where he should have been snatched? He had ditched it to crash the bachelor party of the son of a fellow noble. There he had made a complete ass of himself, as he often did. It was the only way he knew to keep the marriage-hungry mares away from him. And then he runs into a mare that he couldn’t understand. “You…don’t want me to marry you?” he asked, trailing behind the mad mare and Twilight’s pet. “Oh, heavens no! You’re awful!” The mare stopped suddenly and spun to face him. “Not in most things, I should clarify. Just as marriage material. You’re probably wonderful at whatever your day job is. Now would you like to have fun with us?” Blueblood was now quite certain that this mare was insane. And he had never hung around a mad mare. It might be fun. So, he continued to follow. “What…what am I even looking at?” Blueblood asked incredulously a few minutes later, having reached Applejack’s cart. Applejack, quite despondent after failing to sell anything, looked up at the noblestallion. She read his emotions in a moment and knew that she had exactly zero chance of selling anything to him. “I’m selling apples to guests,” she said. “Or at least, I’m trying.” Blueblood looked over at Rarity. “Fellow inmate?” he joked. “And what is that supposed to mean?” Applejack said darkly. “You do know how catering works, yes? The Crown paid for all of the food being provided in there. As far as the guests are concerned, it’s all free. Why in Auntie’s name would anybody pay for your fares?” Applejack thunk’ed her head down on the platform of her stand. “Why didn’t anypony tell me?” “Oh,” Rarity said sadly. “I’ve always had other ponies handle the catering at my events, Applejack. And I’ve always been too nervous at them to even try to buy food that apparently was free.” “But you paid the caterer,” Blueblood said. “I always pay for good service,” Rarity insisted. “And you thought that catering service cost that much?” the prince asked incredulously. “And someponies say that I am out of touch!” “Well!” Rarity exclaimed. She didn’t have anything intelligent to say after that. Applejack looked at all of the food she had Big Mac deliver to the palace earlier today. Deliveries that probably had the servants laughing behind their backs at him as he left. Only, being a changeling, Big Mac knew what they were feeling. And it wasn’t like he could have taken all of those desserts back without them spoiling. If she couldn’t sell them, she’d have to toss them. Unless… Applejack kicked over the sign listing the prices for her goods. “Attention everypony!” she said loudly enough for everyone on the green to hear her. “For now until the end of the Gala, all of my apple treats are absolutely free!” Rarity ran up to her. “Applejack, what are you doing?” “Well, it’s like the fancy pony here said: you can’t sell food when there’s catering! But I can still advertise Sweet Apple Acres! The name’s all over the tins and the boxes. I’m going to make something out of this opportunity!” And indeed, there was a hesitant line of ponies looking over Applejack’s wares. But no one was willing to step forward yet. So, she served a couple of fritters on a plate and walked over to Rarity, Spike and the fop. (Well, that was how she labeled him.) “Here. You at least know how good my stuff is.” “We sure do!” Spike exclaimed, taking a hot fritter and practically shoving it into his mouth. “Thank you, Applejack,” said Rarity, delicately taking a bite out of her fritter. “Your culinary creations, as always, are superior to those of any caterer.” “Well, that’s really sweet to say, Sugarcube.” Rarity looked around her, warily searching for upcoming “Perfect Moments” to stay away from. What she saw for the most part were nobles playing power politics with each other and deriving great pleasure from snubbing the “special guests”, aka common ponies like herself who had done something worthy of a ticket in the past year. Those special guests were easy for Rarity to spot, because none of them wore their fancy clothes with any degree of confidence. Rarity suddenly felt quite despondent. She wondered if anypony here was having a Perfect Moment, including her other friends. “Ex…excuse me,” she heard the uncharacteristically hesitant voice of Prince Blueblood at her shoulder. “Is that pastry really that good?” Rarity looked over at him. “It really is,” she told him. “And I’m not just saying that because Applejack is my friend. She wouldn’t stand for me to praise her for something she wasn’t good at.” Applejack nodded. “Mm, that’s true.” To Blueblood she asked, “Would you like to try a fritter?” “Um…yes.” “Hot diggety!” she exclaimed, preparing her first “sale” to somepony other than her guaranteed customers. “Here you go. Dig in and tell me what you think.” Blueblood took one infinitesimal taste of the fritter, and instantly spit it out in disgust. “Ugh!” he exclaimed. “Are these those kinds of fritters? And are those dumplings? And caramel apples? My royal lips have touched common carnival fare! I am going to the buffet immediately, to cleanse my palette! Are you coming, Rarity?” Rarity looked sadly over at Applejack. She had hoped that her “date”s act might spur the nobility to follow his example, but now— “Excuse me, but did that stallion just say ‘carnival food’?” Soarin’ the Wonderbolt exclaimed. “I love carnival food!” He pushed through the crowd to feast his eyes on Applejack’s menu. Applejack smirked—the jerk had a purpose after all. “What’cha hankering for, partner? Caramel apple? Apple pie? Apple fritter? Apple fries?” “I’ll take that big apple pie. No, don’t cut me a slice, I want the whole thing, so I can share it with the other Wonderbolts!” “Well thank you kindly, sir,” she said as passed over the pie. “And remember the name of Sweet Apple Acres of Ponyville anytime you want even fresher and better pies than that.” “This is the most amazing pie I have ever tasted!” Soarin’ exclaimed after the first bite. “Wait till the gals taste this!” he declared as he walked away. Spike clambered up on the platform of Applejack’s stand. “Come one, come all! To sample Applejack’s Free Carnival Food! Real food, for real ponies!” The special guests, who had been having to deal with noble snubs for nearly an hour now, and who had found nothing digestible at the buffet, crowded forward. And a few minutes after they had cleared out Applejack’s inventory, they started spontaneously singing. A newly full earth pony mare, her dress having been lost some time ago, clambered up atop a dense hedge. “Gals, I was thinking this whole Gala thing was a big mistake just a few minutes ago. But now, with this wonderful food in my belly, with your wonderful song in my ears, I have to say that this is quite possibly the most-perfect moment of my entire life!” Spike looked with panic over at Rarity. Rarity’s eyes opened wide as she felt her third eye opening. And then she turned and shoved Prince Blueblood into a nearby stream. Blueblood screamed like a little filly. He tried to climb out, but managed to slip and fall back in. Several times. The moment, needless to say, was thoroughly ruined. And Rarity was having the time of her life. And then she looked up at her horn. “What was that?” she asked. Other unicorns did the same. Pegasi looked at their wings, and earth ponies looked at their hooves. All of them felt that some portion of their magic had been drained away. And then there was the wave of unstoppable magic, and everything changed for the worse in an instant.