If asked, it would be a safe assumption that most ponies would have guessed Princess Luna to be the more hot-blooded one of the two sisters.
After all, she was the one that had historically led the charges on the front lines in her past. She was the one often sent for hard-nosed diplomacy. Which was about the only sort of diplomacy she considered worth doing.
But also because she naturally did what most ponies had to be taught in prison to do on their first day. She treated life like it was the biggest stallion in the yard, and walked up to life with the intention of knocking it unconscious to assert dominance before it had the chance to do the same to her. Incidentally, this was also why she was still barred from most taverns to this day.
But because of this, ponies often forget Princess Celestia also held a terrifying temper of her own. After all, Celestia was the mistress of the sun and there was nothing that burned hotter than its rays. Whilst she was Gentle and serine in places she could be scorching and mercilessly unforgiving in all the others.
It had been a very long time since anypony had ever seen this other side of the princess of the daylight however. Even Luna had forgotten it, which was why she did not expect what happened next.
“Good riddance.” Luna spat as she watched the maid and that creature flew from the room. She turned towards her sister once more. “Now then, dear sister, prepare yourself for swift retribut- gah!” Luna stopped her speech mid-sentence as she was lifted into the air. She hung there for a moment, suspended by her tail before she was pinned up against the wall upside down.
Her limbs clamped against the wall in magical bindings as her horn scraped against the floor. Shaking the shock from her mind she tried to move, engulfing her horn with magic to break the hold. But felt her magic ebb away, silenced by the pink bubble once more.
Suddenly her vision was engulfed by the white fur of her sister's hooves. She glanced up then quickly realised she was upside down and glanced back downwards to see an irate face glaring down at her.
Her sister's eyebrows furrowed and her mouth fixed into a wide smile. It took another moment for Luna to realise that she was still upside down and her sister's smile was in fact a very prominent scowl.
“Are you quite done, dear sister?” Celestia growled. It had been a long time since she had heard that tone spoken. All at once Luna's anger cracked slightly, it didn’t shatter but there was definitely structural weakness and leaks were quickly forming.
She hadn’t seen her sister mad at her like this in nearly fifteen hundred years, not since she had placed her hoof in a bowl of hot water, while she slept in the grand duchess's new bed. Or even when she had replaced the conditioner with hair removal cream the day before a national address.
She had not even seen her that mad during that dreadful night when the Nightmare had taken over and had thrown both their lives into disrepair, if anything her sister had just seemed lost.
Luna opened her mouth but Celestia hoof covered it, “I think you're done talking, maybe you would benefit from listening for a change?” She whispered, teeth bared like a wolf's snarl. “Perhaps you would like to hear a story instead, about how Silver Tongue and I pulled your flank out of the fire you so gleefully lit under yourself in Griffonstone.”
Luna raised one brow slowly, Griffonstone, she was hearing a lot of that dreadful name lately, what had she done so badly in Griffonstone?
“I bet you're thinking, what did I do in Griffonstone?” Celestia said.
Luna blinked then shook the surprise from her face, but they both knew she was lying.
Her sister exhaled slowly, but the fire still burned in her eyes, “You know, I’m so happy you’re back Luna,” she said though she looked anything but, “I don’t think I was ever truly happy in all those thousand years you were gone, I thought the only thing that could make me happy was seeing you safe and home again, but by the graves of our ancestors you really test that sometimes Lu.”
“What are you talking about,” was what Luna tried to say, but all that came out was a muffled mumble.
“Do you know in the two years you’ve been back I’ve had no less than seventy-two complaints from foreign dignitaries, can you guess from how many countries?”
Again Luna tried to talk but Celestia cut her off. “One country, one! Odd I thought, she gets on well with the minotaur's, despite those border disputes in the past? Zebrica, she’s practically their strongest advocate, in spite of the fact I remembered she strongly advocated for a scorched earth policy when their tyrant queen's skirmishes spilled into our lands.” Celestia said, scratching her chin in mock thought.
Luna didn’t actually remember that, she remembered something about a dispute of course. But she had never advocated for a scorched earth policy? A slightly singed one perhaps, medium to well done at the most extreme.
“But the Griffon delegation, well she wouldn’t even meet them, despite the fact they’re technically our oldest Ally. I know she has her problems with them, but she is the one that always talks about duty to our country first and foremost. She always drones on about how the monarchy should be above pettiness and stand strong, a symbol to all. So perhaps she will behave herself? Especially since they are so pleased to be the first country to host you since your return, they are very big on royalty after all.”
Luna was already starting to tire of this, the words, “get to the point!” Was on the tip of her muffled tongue. Ponyfeathers, her sister should have taken her own advice about monologuing.
“So imagine my surprise when our poor friend Silver Tongue came back and said that Luna committed what would in most cases be a declaration of war.”
Ah, there it was, the reason for Celestia's anger perhaps? Luna's eyes widened at how casually her sister used that word. War? With the rodent chasers? Over a few jokes?
Luna felt her sister's hoof lift off her mouth and wasted no time speaking, “What in the seven rings of Tartarus are you talking about Tia, I did no such thing!”
Celestia cocked her brow at that. “Really? So you didn’t insult the whole of their royal family, called them rodent chasers, unfit to govern themselves, and then smash their sacred staff on the ground, none of that happened, yes?”
Luna's mind flicked back to that day. It had been a bit of a blur in all honesty, she had remembered cracking a few jokes at their expense sure. But she did that with the minotaur's and they didn’t seem to mind, they communicated with headbutts after all! A few little words were hardly going to affect them. It wasn’t her fault if those bird brains could not take a little ribbing.
Odd though, she didn’t remember breaking any staff. Come to think of it, she didn’t remember much after taking the stage. Only seeing the sea of twisting snake-like tails. Hearing that incessant squawking, those pointed beaks sharp as daggers, those razor-sharp claws that could dig into skin like knives…
Luna felt a shiver of revolution snap her back to reality. She shook the thought from her mind, “Whatever lies you’ve been told, the truth is we, I mean I did not declare a war. Nor did I break their pathetic little stick!” Luna said, trying to match her sister's gaze which was hard to do when she was staring up at her chin. “So get this business out of your head, if any war has been declared it is by their hoof, not mine. But if they want a fight so badly, I will happily oblige them.”
“Oh?” Her sister said, almost innocently, “With what army, pray tell?”
Luna blinked, staring up at her sister, “Well… the royal one obviously?”
“Ah, that one.” Celestia said with sarcasm dripping off every word, “The one that has not existed in over six hundred years?”
Luna's jaw opened and closed like a cow chewing its cud, “What! You are pulling my tail are you not!” It sounded like a joke, she waited for the punchline, but it never came, “you’re serious, why am I just hearing about this now? This… this is downright treasonous, how do we defend ourselves?”
Her sister stared at her like the teacher staring at the slowest pupal. “Well it’s pretty simple actually. You would know this if you didn’t throw all your financial scrolls in the bottom of the waste basket.” She said sternly. Luna had the grace to at least look momentarily embarrassed. In her defence, she never thought Tia would find out about that.
She had tried to read them. But every time she had started, she had found her brain skipping to the end in an act of self-defence against numerical poisoning.
“Simply speaking. After you left, other nations attacked us, thinking we were weak, well, we were weak really, without you.” Celestia looked down for a moment, then seemed to regain her composure. “By the time the dust cleared, we were flat out broke, I was desperate for any Ally, so I went to Draconian and brokered a treaty, they get a tenth of our natural gemstones annually and…”
“And?” Luna said, as her sisters eyes shifted nervously.
“I also sold our family jewels to the dragons for gold and support, enough to kick start our economy again.”
Subconsciously, Luna's eyes flickered to her tiara sitting on her bed. Her sister seemed to catch her gaze. “I got them back!" Celestia said quickly, "they had a ward on them making them indestructible.” She paused, “and indigestible,” then quickly added, “just…don’t ask me how I got them back.”
Luna opened her mouth then closed it, she decided she really didn’t want to know how she got them back.
“The point being, Instead of building up our military again, I lent the surplus to other nations who weren’t so lucky and gained more allies. It got to the point where it was more beneficial to befriend us than fight us. Now, if a nation attacks us, we simply call in their debts, hard to fight us when we pay for their army, weapons and food.” Celestia continued on, in that smug way ponies employed when they tried not to sound smug and somehow ended up sounding more because of it.
“But, but what about our enemies!” Luna said a note of almost pleading in her voice. They must had to have some left, right, they couldn't be friends with everyone?
“Actually we don’t, not any national ones. Why do you think I’ve been so very pushy with friendship all these years?” Celestia spoke like a teacher addressing a student, “Not only is it good for the soul, but for the wallet as well. Wars are dreadfully wasteful and expensive things. Trust me, I was the one that had to deal with the logistics of them all, while you sauntered off with the soldiers.”
“I refuse to believe this,” Luna growled, “this is an outrage, you disbanded our military! Grandfather would be spinning in his grave, have you no shame sister?!”
Celestia fixed her sister with another deadpan glare, “You do realise it was grandfather that brought most of those wars on us. I loved the stallion, but he was quite mad towards the end.”
“That is utter slander!” Luna protested. “He was not mad, he… he just had a lot on his mind is all.”
“Sister, in the last decade of his life he declared war on Canterlot Castle itself, a cloud that blocked out the sun during a ceremony, and on the squirrels of the palace gardens for stealing his acorns.”
Luna stuck up her chin, which had the opposite effect intended upside down, “And have you noticed a distinct lack of nut-related insurrection, hmm?” She said proudly, but deep in the back of her mind even she had had a hard time defending those decisions.
Especially the cloud one, she was still trying to work out why he had sentenced it to death by stoning of all things. All it had accomplished was a few holes in the cloud along with twenty one ponies injured and hundreds of bits of property damage.
But she would be damned if anyone was going to insult the founding father of Equestria in her presence. “You dismantle our army and now you besmirch grandfather's good name with this revisionist dreck, you’ve changed sister.”
She watched her sister messaging her temples slowly, “Yes Luna, perhaps I have, I have had a long time to think in your absence. Now I see our grandfather's flaws and our family’s flaws echoed in you. Ones that I had tried to rid of myself so very long ago,” Celestia said with a worried expression marring her face. “You do not need to cling to the past Luna, we can forget our grudges and or slights, we can build our own future anew.”
Luna scoffed, “Honestly sister, your over-exaggeration does you no credit. Our family has endured because of our traditions and our heritage. We do not forgive or forget, that’s what makes us strong.”
Luna watched as her sister brought a hoof to her forehead and muttered, “Fields above, was I also this stubborn?” Before Luna could comment though her sister added, “Let us put this another way, thanks to your traditions and slights, we now have to come up with a way in which to placate those affected by it. Not just the griffons, who no doubt will be looking for reparations, rather costly ones I might add. But also from our subjects, you know the ones who keep us in power?”
Luna scoffed, “We are the rightful princesses,” she said, “since when did we care what the plebeians think?”
Celestia gave her sister a deadpan glare. “You seemed to care a great deal during nightmare night.”
Luna opened her mouth to retort but found her brain drawing a blank on an answer. Damn it all her sister was good at wagging that tongue of hers. “Oh alright, fine, very well, if this is all that is needed, I will get somepony to write up an apology to send to those-” She paused when Celestia gave her another pointed look. “-Griffons saying how very sorry I am, for allegedly breaking their little walking stick, etcetera etcetera. Now will you please let me down from here, the world is begging to spin.”
Celestia shook her head. “I’m afraid that won’t cut it, Luna. You don’t know how serious this is. Think of it this way. Would you take a half-hearted apology, if someone broke your crown?”
Luna snorted, “I’d like to see them try it!”
Celestia rolled her eyes, “Luna, the public won’t just let this slide. We have griffon citizens, we are the country that tries to spread the message of peace and acceptance. That doesn’t work if one-half of it crosses the road when they see a lion walking by.”
Luna furrowed her brow in thought. Though mostly she was thinking about how all those griffons had snuck into her country. Stronger border patrol was needed immediately! But she doubted her sister would like to listen to that proposal at this time. “What more could they want Tia? Tell them I’m sorry if you must, but I am not going to grovel or kiss anyone’s claws.” She mentally retched at the very idea of those dirty talons near her royal mouth.
Celestia paused then, Luna did not like the look her elder sister was giving her. “You don’t need to kiss anything. But if we are speaking about griffon placating. Lucky for you, there seems to be only one that might need this and a pacifier does the trick.”
Silence reigned for a long moment as Luna waited for the punchline that never came. “That’s not funny.”
“I’m not joking,” Celestia said, an edge to her tone now, “if I was joking I would not have announced it this morning to half the city.”
“YOU WHAT!” Luna screamed, so loud that the hairs on her sister's face bristled from the impact of the air.
Celestia winced slightly as the hurricane blast of indignation passed around her. “Do I need to use the silencing rune again sister?”
“How dare you?” Luna roared.
“How dare I?” Celestia asked, brow furrowed, “how dare I what? How dare I stop you from ruining your reputation?”
Luna could not believe this, she refused to believe this was real, “This goes too far sister, have you so little disregard for my feelings on the matter?”
“Perhaps if you ever told me about your feelings!” Celestia snapped, frustration clear on her face, “You tell no pony how you truly feel, you bottle everything up, you think talking about problems is some sort of weakness.”
“And you think blubbering about them is a strength?!” Luna snapped back, glaring up at her sister, “I am no fainting maiden, I do not feel the need to cry about every slight. Did you hear grandfather talk endlessly of his woes?”
“No,” Celestia said slowly with a deliberate sharpness to her tone, “but do you not think that might be why he went mad? Perhaps bottling your emotions up until the well is so full, that they come bursting forth in a torrent of rage and anger is something we both want to avoid?!”
They both lapsed into silence once more. It didn’t need to be said what her sister was talking about, they both knew all too well. “This is irrelevant,” Luna said, breaking the silence, “I do not see how this has anything to do with you thrusting some overgrown chicken into my life and proclaiming it to be my heir no less!”
“You didn’t exactly give us time to come up with a better plan!” Celestia said pacing now, “I was trying to save you, you worked hard to revive your name, turn it into something ponies can be proud to hear.”
“And you thought me playing wet nurse to a field's damn griffon would do that, how exactly?” Luna exclaimed.
“Well, perhaps it might open your eyes to see that they are just the same as we are. Plus it sends a message of acceptance, that we would care for a small cub as if she was our own child. If nothing else at least there will be one less orphan in this world.” She said in an exacerbated tone, “Besides we both know you always wanted to have a foal, you always moan when I talk of my foals.”
Luna rolled her eyes, not this again, “I moan because you show me endless paintings of yours every time we talk, it’s exhausting.” Luna said.
Celestia paused mid-step and turned, a slightly hurt expression crossing her face, “I thought you liked them?”
“The first thirty times perhaps,” Luna muttered.
Celestia gasped, placing a hoof against her chest, “What’s wrong with my foals, they’re adorable.”
“Sister, the youngest one is nearly ninety years old for feather's sake!”
“Not when I had the portrait made.” Celestia chided, folding her forelegs across her chest, “you know what I think, I think you’re just jealous that I actually had foals and they were cuter than yours would have been.”
Luna gasped, the audacity of this female diamond dog, “I am not! When I do have my own foals, they will be twice as beautiful and thrice as adorable as yours are.”
Celestia gave her a sideways glance and scoffed, “Oh, and pray tell, when will that happen?”
“In my own time, I thank thee very much.” Luna retorted, huffing as she glanced away.
“It’s been about two thousand years, you're not exactly getting any younger,” Celestia muttered.
“You hag!” Luna roared, “I am just as beautiful and fertile as the day I turned two hundred.”
Celestia gave her a slow methodical appraisal with her eyes. Then lifted up her hoof swaying it side to side as she mouthed, “meh.”
Luna felt her cheeks redden and not simply because all the blood was going to her head. “Well perhaps I was waiting for the right stallion or mare, we don’t all go rushing into the first one we see, like the royal pool stallion for instance.”
This time it was Celestia's turn to blush, “That was one time seventeen hundred years ago!” Celestia said though it seemed even that length of time didn’t dampen her embarrassment much.
“Oh yes, and that family tree is still going strong I see.” Luna said with a vicious smirk. “Speaking of which, I spotted my great great grand nephew the other day.”
Celestia leaned in towards her, eyes narrowed. “Do not bring that up to Prince Blueblood, he’s very sensitive about his family’s lineage.”
Luna didn’t have to answer, her smirk said it all.
Luna watched as her sister leaned back, closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, before looking back down at her. “Regardless, all of this is beyond the point. The dye is cast, like it or not she is your legal heir, what’s done is done.”
“I won’t do it.” Luna felt the blood boiling once more, “I will not raise that thing.”
“You…will not have to.” Celestia said with downcast eyes, “I will do it, that poor dear deserves happiness and I know she will not get it from you. But I need you to at least play along with this for the time being.”
“Why, what is the point, everyone will know, I will not sully myself with the likes of them.”
Celestia closed her eyes for a moment, a tired sigh left her nostrils and her whole body seemed to sag as she sat down, “Why do you still hate them so much, sister? It has been a thousand years, can you not let whatever happened go?”
“I will not!” She roared, burning ire in her eyes, “You do not know what it was like sister.”
“Then tell me.” Celestia said, softly moving closer. “Let me help you sister.”
Luna turned away then, unable to meet her sister's gaze. Pride and shame slithered into a sickening concoction inside her chest all at once. She did not need reminding of that time. It was in the past. What was done could never be undone. “I don’t need help, what I need is for there to be less of those creatures in my life.”
Celestia rubbed her eyes, she looked older than, at that moment, “Please sister,” she said slowly, “please do this for us, for this country at least, make up a reason if you need to, but you must at least appear to be that lioness mother.”
There was no authority behind her sister's tone, it was something else, like a pony pleading to another to step away from the ledge.
“What will you do if I say no?” Luna asked, her tone more curious than threatening.
Celestia stared long and hard at her, then she closed her eyes and looked down towards her hooves, her long white horn ignited and Luna felt herself being slowly lowered back down to the ground.
“Nothing sister, I would do nothing at all. Believe me or not, everything I have done, I have tried to do to help you. Perhaps my methods have not always been to your liking, but all I ever wanted to do was to see my baby sister safe and happy.”
As Luna brought herself back up to her hooves, she wanted nothing more than to play the stubborn adversary, she really did. She was the type of mare that collected grudges like medals and this one was a really doozy.
But as she looked into her sister's crestfallen expression she knew her answer. Her sister had done so much for her and never asked anything in return. Despite the fact Luna knew that this would only end in utter disaster, she found her lips moving before she could form the thought in her head.
“Fine,” she said after a long ponderous moment, “fine, damn you, I will play along with this idiotic pantomime…for now.”
Something close to hope ignited once more in sisters eyes as Celestia smiled, a soft thing, but it was enough that Luna felt the fire in her chest simmer somewhat. “Really? That’s all I ask Lu,” Her smile took on something more playful for the first time since yesterday,
“This is only a temporary thing, you understand.” Luna said, rubbing life back into her hooves. “Do not think that this means that I will take this thing on as my child or even as as an apprentice. I will have nothing to do with it outside official business and I will not be near it unless I have to be. Also I want it thoroughly sterilized before any contact, I do not want this mange or rabies I’ve been hearing about.”
“Umm.” Celestia said, her smile faltering somewhat she looked as though she was about to say something else. Then seemed to think better of it, “O-kay, I’m sure we can work something out.” Ever the diplomat her smile rallied in the face of overwhelming odds, “I’m sure you’ll have a lot of time to work things out with your two months off.”
Luna blinked, “Time off?” she said, glancing back at her sister.
“Yes…I maybe, sort of, perhaps, announced you’ll be retiring to Cloudsdale Manor to better bond with your daughter, for the next two months.”
“You are, banishing me again?” Luna said, eyes narrowing suspiciously.
Celestia shook her head, “I hardly call relaxing in our old family mansion a banishment, I wish I could go.”
“You are more than welcome to.” Luna said sardonically. “You make a punishment sound like some holy day sister.”
“I told you it’s called a holiday now, Luna, and I guess that’s why I was always the politician and you were always the general.” She smirked more honestly now as she let her wing slip around her sister's shoulders. Luna felt the urge to shrug it off. But she had always found her sister's wing comforting, even if the thing it was attached to was certainly not.
“It will only be until the news dies away Lu. Trust an old hoof in this matter, ponies' attention spans are never long. Besides, who knows, you might even have fun?”
“I very much doubt that,” Luna grumbled. “But fine, I suppose I could catch up on some of my old hobbies, perhaps take up fencing again, I am a bit rusty.” She did like the idea of that, working up a sweat, the feeling of steel in her hoof once more. “The mansion is big enough that I shan’t have to look at that griffon at leas-“ she paused as she felt her sister's wing contract that little bit tighter against her waist.
“Oh, that reminds me, just one more thing.” Her sister said with a sudden hardness in her eyes that surprised Luna. “Whilst we are on the subject of our little cub, regardless of your personal opinions, that lioness is now family. She is now our flesh and blood, understand?” she said, pointing a hoof none too softly onto Luna's chest. “Whether you like it or not, she is ours to protect and care for.”
Luna glanced down at her sister’s hoof digging into her chest, “Yes Tia, you have made that demonstrably clear, I am aware of how our family works, even if she is nothing more than a little unsightly twig on the family tree, I’ll be sure-“
It wasn’t so much the fire inside reflecting in her sister's eyes that stopped her, it was more like a volcano. “No I don’t think you quite understand the meaning, I want your word, Luna.” She said, her wings squeezing that little bit harder, her voice going that much harsher, “She is under our protection, she is under the family oath, remember?”
Luna stared into her sisters' violet-coloured eyes, seeing a steely resolve she had not seen since she had stared at her own mothers.
Luna did not need reminding of her family’s unofficial oath, it seemed despite her sister's boosting of shedding her family’s traditions, she had not shed all of them. There was a saying among the royal family of Canterlot.
‘Grex Herdum Cornu Meum’ ~ ‘My herd for my horn.’
That, of course, was the more royal and regal way of saying it. The real way it was often understood was more along the lines of ‘touch any of my children and expect a bloody great big horn charging at you at mach-ten and that’s if I decide to be merciful.’ But unfortunately crest makers found that rather hard to fit onto a sigil.
But the point, (pun intended) still stood. The sisters were willing to do anything for the sake of their kin.
Luna met her sister's steely gaze and despite how much it pained her she gave a begrudging nod. It might not have been much. But to the two Alicorns, it was a pact sealed tighter than any treaty. She would keep this griffon safe.
Even if she had crossed her primary feathers behind her back when she did so.