Miles underneath Canterlot, Anon sat in a bleak cell. Charged for the crime of sleeping with a princess days before her marriage. His only companions are his marefriend Cream Heart, arrested for accomplice to cuckholdry and Twilight Sparkle. Who was berating him from the other side of the bars.
“I can’t believe you! A consenting married couple is one thing but my brother’s bride!?” Twilight scolded “I didn’t know Shining was your brother” Anon defended.
“We are sorry Twilight” Cream Heart apologised.
Rubbing her temples with her hooves Twilight clamped her eyes shut trying to think with all this crap going on at once.
“By the way does Cadance’s eyes usually turn green when she gets emotional?” Anon asked. This question snapped Twilight out of her thought process “what?” She asked “Cadance’s eyes, they were glowing green it was super weird. Now that I think about it she was acting really strange the whole time” Anon explained.
Raising an eyebrow Twilight took a step closer to the cell “what do you mean by ‘strange?’” She asked “well for one she came onto me like a drunk prom date, I mean I’ve just got that mojo that attracts beautiful mares as Cream here can attest” Anon explained gesturing to his blushing marefriend “she was going on about how Shining hadn’t fucked her in weeks and… wait a minute” Anon stopped himself as he realised something “she said a few weeks back she was saving herself for the wedding night. Unless she changed her mind at the last minute. Ok something is definitely not right here and I don’t mean that I was thrown in jail” Anon stated.
“I think you might be onto something, when I met Cadance just after getti by to Canterlot she acted like she didn’t know me at all” Twilight explained “you don’t think something happened to her do you?” Cream Heart asked “hey let’s not jump to conclusions. I’m sure there’s a logical explanation for all of this. I mean it’s not like Cadance has been replaced by some evil being planning to take over the kingdom first chance she gets” Anon stated before realising what he just said.
“Right?” He asked, getting a nervous twinge in his voice.
Thinking over Anon’s words, Twilight started putting the prices together.
“I’ll figure this out. I promise” she said, turning and leaving the two ponies alone.
“I’m sorry, for all of this” Anon apologised, looking over the bars and bricks that surrounded them. Placing her head under Anon’s jaw, Cream Heart nuzzled him “it’s not your fault, we were both in that bed” Cream Heart stated.
“Yeah I remember, it was fucking awesome” Anon admitted, getting a giggle from the mare. Gaining a more serious expression Anon stepped up to the bars “I’ll get us out of here” Anon stated.
Looking over the cell Anon tapped his hoof against the cell door. With little effort the door swung open.
“They-they didn’t even lock the door?” Anon asked “of course, who would try and escape from under the Castle?” Cream Heart asked.
With a stone face Anon looked at her “one of these days I’ll have to give a stern talking to the royal guard” Anon stated.
The two began making their way out of the dungeons and into the castle proper. As they went through the great hallways they were found to be empty. While normally there would be a few guards or staff stationed along the walls.
“I don’t like this Anon” Cream Heart stated “yeah, I don’t want to jinx it but I've got a bad feeling about this” Anon agreed.
Turning a corridor, Anon and Cream Heart froze. At the other end of the hallway was a black creature, it was shaped like a pony but… wrong.
It had black skin, insect-like wings, a thin frame and a curved jagged horn.
Before they could back away the creature saw them. It’s pure blue eyes almost stabbing them.
“It’s times like this I miss my 2nd amendment sanctioned flame thrower” Anon muttered.
Letting out an ungodly screech the creature quickly took off into the air retreating out of sight.
Taking off after it the two chased it until they came to a large chapel-like room. Inside they could see dozens, no, hundreds of the creatures. Celestia and a few other ponies were trapped in a green substance. Twilight and Cadance, who looks rather scruffy, were standing at the foot of the altar. On the altar itself was Shining Armor and a larger version of the creatures.
Obviously a mare she had sickly green hair almost like seaweed, a longer horn and slit irises.
“Hello Anon~”
Freezing as his name was said Anon tried to figure out how this abomination knew who he was.
“Oh? Don’t you recognise your princess?” She asked in a mocking tone. Things started to clock and Anon's jaw started to drop.
“That’s right Anon, I was Cadance! I’ve been impersonating her for weeks so I can conquer Equestira and drain you foolish ponies of your love to feed my hive!” Chrysalis explained.
“You’ll never get away with this Chrysalis!” Cadance declared “yeah especially with a plan like that” Anon stated. All heads turned to face Anon after that comment “ex-excuse me?” Chrysalis asked.
“Anon don’t help the villain,” Twilight warned.
“I’m just saying. If you wanted to rule Equestira wouldn’t Celestia be a better option? I mean don’t get me wrong everybody loves Cadance but not to the extent they love Celestia” Anon explained “hmmm, a fair point” Chrysalis agreed.
“Anon stop!” Cadance ordered.
“What? I’m right. Besides even if that wasn’t an option you’re a race of shapeshifters. Couldn’t you just replace a sizable chunk of the population, live their lives, harvest love from their loved ones to grow your numbers. It’ll take a generation or two but depending on fertility rates you guys could easily become a majority given enough time-“ Anon stated, stopping by as Chrysalis teleported mere inches away from him.
“That’s quite the plan” she said, her fanged smile shining at him “maybe I won’t drain you entirely, for now. You have some interesting ideas little pony” she added, her sinister aura practically spilling out over him.
“Ok, here’s another idea, look behind you” Anon warmed, pointing his hoof behind Chrysalis.
Turning her head Chrysalis’s eyes went wide at the sudden wave of magic coming from Cadance and Shining. Blasting her and her hive out of Equestira.
“Ok… that happened” Anon said, sounding surprised despite the fact this was the least weird thing to happen to him.
“Anon?” Cadance, the real one, asked. Surprised to see her friend “hey Princess, sorry I slept with your imposter” Anon greeted in an apologetic tone.
Blinking her eyes in surprise, Cadance didn’t push the issue. Having joined the rest of her race in accepting Anon as the co-holder of the title Master of Chaos.
“Well- regardless. Now that everypony is here, care to walk me down the aisle?” Cadance asked “it would be my pleasure” Anon agreed.
With Rarity working her magic (both literally and figuratively) Cadance was in pristine condition and at the altar.
Sat next to Cream Heart Anon watched the ceremony, a smile spread across his face.
It was the after party that Anon enjoyed the best. Dancing, drinking, all around it was a great time.
“Thank you again for coming Anon, having all my friends here means a lot to me” Cadance thanked “the pleasure is all mine Cadance” Anon responded before turning his attention to the slightly sheepish Shining “no hard feelings?” Anon asked “y-yeah, sorry about all that” Shining apologised “hey from your point of view I nutted in your fienceé, it’s a natural reaction. Heck I thought you had sneaked into the clauses while I was getting pinned” Anon said chuckling slightly.
Awkwardly taking a sip from his punch glass Shining raised an eyebrow at the taste “this stuff is a lot stronger than I remember” he commented “yeah it does taste a little off, I’ve had four glasses and I feel all-“ Cadance said before stopping. Her eyes wide with shock as she looked at her husband “S-Shiny, you’re having an… ahem” she stuttered embarrassedly as she pointed down.
Looking down between his front legs, Shining almost jumped out of his skin. All but slamming his flank down and using his front legs to cover his “fifth leg” while his face went bright red. All across the room most stallions seemed to be having the same problem. All except for Anon who was stood there grinning like an idiot.
The mares seemed to be having a similar issue with their nethers, the scent starting to seep into the air “happy wedding night gift/my revenge” Anon all but cheered “Anon, what did you do?” Celestia asked trotting up to the thestral, her face starting to turn red “I got a gift from Zecora and spiked the punch with it” Anon explained, his smile showing off his pride “is that why you said don’t drink the punch?” Cream Heart asked, realising what her coltfriend did “yep, I love you baby but I went six rounds over what a stallion should be capable of yesterday. I have friction burns, bruises and a bite mark that all need medical attention” Anon explained.
“Sorry about the last one, I get excited easily” Cream Heart apologised.
“Anywho we better get going. I promised myself I wouldn’t start another orgy after the Las Pegasus incident a year back” Anon said, scooping Cream Heart up in his fore-legs.
“We’ll send for our luggage. Hi ho Anon, away!” Anon called out before flying into the sky.
-1 month later-
Kneeling with her head resting against the toilet, Anon held her hair out the way as she emptied her stomach again.
Standing at the door Button peaked in, worried about his mother.
“You ok mom?” Button asked.
Weakly Cream Heart lifted her head up “I’m fine sweetie, these morning sicknesses are just taking a lot out of me” she said trying to form a smile.
“See kid? It’s just morning sickness-“ Anon started before he realised exactly what was happening.
“Oh fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu-“
AN: Papa Anon is coming