The wind isn't the same anymore.
Above me lays a beautiful blue canvas stretching beyond the horizon in every which way, painted with the occasional streak or tuft of blinding white. Far below me sprawls the never-ending expanse of the sea, glittering specks of golden light from Celestia's sun sprinkling its ever-shifting surface as it sways to the dance of the wind. I smoothly halt my flight into a hover and take in all there is around me.
Out here, there is nothing to hear but the soothing ambience of the ocean and the whispers of the wind. Out here, there is nothing to see but brilliant shades of blue and white as far as the eye can see. Out here, there is nothing to feel but the caress of the breeze through my mane, tickling my coat and feathers. And yet...
"You can't do this! Please, just hang in a little longer! I-"
I shake my head. Out here, where the sky embraces the sea in eternal tranquility, is where I belong right now. This is where I should be, away from all the noise and the responsibilities. Away from the faces and voices, and the clambering of hooves, and the tears.
Why should I go back? What would be worth going back? If I go back, I'll have to face it. And I can't face it, I won't. Everything is so peaceful here, why can't it just stay like this forever?
"Come on, you're like the strongest pony in all of Equestria! There's gotta be-"
Something brushes against my wing. I flinch and whip around, half expecting to see Twilight or Fluttershy, begging me to return. Instead, a single green leaf floats lazily in front of me, caught between the wind and my wing strokes. I eye it curiously. It must have gotten trapped in the wake of my flight when I first took off; there's not a single tree, blade of grass, or other speck of green visible in any direction. I stare a little closer, noting the familiar ovate shape of a leaf from an apple tree.
Two gentle, green eyes stare weakly back.
No. Please, I'm not ready yet. I don't want to!
I stumble briefly in blind panic before dashing away. It doesn't matter where, just anywhere that's away. My mane whips furiously behind me, the wind in my ear becoming a deafening roar. I spare a glance behind; the leaf is still there, its green hue ever so distinct from the blues behind it. It spins and rolls and thrashes in the wake of my flight, but nevertheless continues to follow, continues to haunt.
Green, like the gentle shade of apple trees at Sw-
No!
I beat my wings faster, harder. They're starting to ache now, but I can't stop. I have to get away. Doesn't pain only exist in the mind? It can't hurt me if I don't give it power, if I don't let it become real. I won't let it become real!
The leaf continues to follow.
I tilt a wing and make a hard left in the air.
The leaf continues to follow.
I grit my teeth and enter a tight zigzag, diving into a corkscrew with a barrel roll, with flips and spins and everything that I've learned, from all my years of flying, from all the daredevil stunts to the races to the accidents, to all the wonderful things that happen in between.
The leaf continues to follow.
"It's alright, sugarcu-"
"No it's not! LEAVE ME ALONE!"
I push hard against the air below and enter a steep ascent. Clouds whizz by as the sky around me takes on a darker and darker shade. The air is thinner up here, but it doesn't matter. Why should anything matter?
Up here, the sky no longer joins with the earth below. The stars dance in beautiful constellations, but are alone, abandoned by the ground behind a blanket of cerulean blue.
I feel the leaf brush against an ear.
A cold hoof reaching up to gently scratch my-
I push away with all my strength and dive down towards the sea. My wings buzz harder than they have in so long. The surrounding landscape begins to shimmer as a cone of air trails around me. Tears flow freely from my eyes now, streaming off my cheek and dissipating in glistening sparkles. The air in front of me grows thicker, thicker, but I greet it as an old friend.
"Ah ain't-"
All my pain and anger and grief and sorrow, I pour into a final scream as I push one last time. The sky itself splits open as the air erupts into a majestic ring of fire.
"Ah ain't scared, Rainbow."
"AJ, don't say it like that! You'll make it, okay? I... I should've been faster! I should've checked for that sinkhole..."
"Ya couldn't ha-"
"I don't care! If I'd been helping you with the chores instead of trying out new tricks, we wouldn't be here!"
"Rainbow, ah-"
"Why for once couldn't I have just-"
"LISTEN TO ME, RAINBOW DASH!"
"..."
"Ah know yer hurtin' now, but ah know you. Ya blame yerself for the bad as much as yer proud of the good. But ya gotta know this here was outta yer control. Apple Bloom's been old and strong enough to know to manage, but ah know you."
"But I-"
"Yer gonna have to be strong, Rainbow, like... never before. As long as ya remember me, ah'll never leave you."
"AJ please, I-"
"Ah've so much ah wanted to do... but I think ah'm ready to see Ma and Pa again..."
"But I'm not ready!"
"..."
"A- Applejack?"
"..."
"APPLEJACK!"
I descend slowly to a cloud and sit down.
The leaf continues to follow, but the chase has long been over.
I reach out and cup it gently in my hooves, holding it close to my heart as I cry and sob, curling like a leaf away from it all.