I glared angrily up at the restaurant owner, who looked down at me with a sheepish and rather unsure smile.
I turned around to meet my new assailants. A pair of crystal guards stood in the doorway. They weren’t brandishing their weapons or threatening me, which was sort of killing the fantasy for me.
I sighed inwardly. Then I put on a large smile and laughed a bit, walking over and putting one of my hooves on the guard's leg. Unfortunately, I recognized the scarred eye of the one I was resting against: "Fellas! How’ve you been, boys? Sorry about that glue trap last week, by the way. I was targeting that other guard; what’s his name again? Ah, it escapes me."
The two guards looked at each other without so much as an expression of anger before looking back down at me. I patted the guard's armor and tried the classic pretend you belong move by walking out the door. But my hopes were dashed as one of them stuck their hoof out to block me. "By order of the royal guard and Princess Cadance, our orders are to take you in for safety immediately."
I jumped back a bit and glared angrily again. These two weren’t the dumbest; I’d have to escape somehow. I looked all around the shop, looking for somewhere to escape, but there wasn’t anything that could possibly save me from this situation. So I cleared my throat and looked at them slyly, "What if I said that I’m actually already out that door, and this is only an illusion?"
Both guards' faces stayed firmly unimpressed as one of their horns glowed, and I was picked up in their aura with no further recompense. "H-Hey! Let me go!" I tried to punch and kick wildly, but it had no effect, sadly. Alas, all I could do was float around like an astronaut in zero gravity. If I wasn’t in such a pickle, I might’ve found it fun.
I oriented myself to glare at the shopkeeper, who ratted me out as I was being dragged away. I shook my hoof angrily. "I’ll get you! You hear me? You better hope I never get out of jail! I’ll strike when you least expect it! You’ll regret ever-" The other guard blocked my view with a raised brow.
I sheepishly laughed and waved my hoof and made an excuse, "Respectfully, of course."
The scarred guard who was levitating me shot the shopkeeper a look of appreciation and nodded. "Thank you."
I crossed my hooves and glared at the looming view of the castle I was being dragged towards. I never was great at talking to people in a formal manner, and now I’d be interrogated or possibly worse. Just great.
Well, I wasn’t handcuffed. But being levitated in a magic field by a guard while sitting in front of the ruler of the kingdom and her husband was still intimidating. Contrary to what I expected, when they brought me in, they didn’t seem angry. Not immediately anyway.
She introduced herself as Princess Cadance, and her look of sadness was apparent on her face as she descended from her grand crystal throne. "I’ve come to understand that your name is Kieran. Is that correct?" she asked gently.
I crossed my hooves and looked away. I didn’t know the law here, but I was going to use my rights to remain silent at every opportunity.
Shining Armor gave the two guards on either side of me a stern look, "Leave us, thank you."
The one holding onto me huffed, "Are you sure? This filly is-"
"Leave us." Cadence cut him off sharply.
The guard bowed quickly and said, "Of course. My apologies."
I was carefully placed on the ground as the two guards exited the room. The silence as their clattering armor drifted farther away made my heartbeat quicken. Were they sending them away so that they could do something to me? Surely not.
And it was now just sinking in how tiny I was in this world. The throne room was massive, and I was merely a small child to them. And I could be picked up, tossed, and played with like a ragdoll if any unicorn desired. Of which, one of the strongest magic users was walking closer by the second. She took her steps wearily, "The guards told me you were begging for scraps in a restaurant. And then you threatened the owner."
I glared up at her with a short growl, and Cadance stopped her movement abruptly. But she wasn’t speaking with malice, more out of worry. "I can’t imagine how it feels to die and become a new species entirely. And the guards must’ve scared you terribly. I apologize."
I huffed a quick laugh, "Them, scare me? They all collectively have a singular brain cell. I’m not scared." I said this while tightening my crossed hooves.
Cadence lowered her head slightly, "You know, it’s okay to be scared. Even adults get scared every once in a while."
I scoffed, "I’m not a kid. I’m not stupid." I said defiantly.
Cadance’s eyes widened. "Really? How old are you?" she asked in genuine curiosity.
I held my head high and puffed my chest out pathetically, "Well, I was sixteen years old. I could practically live on my own already." I said with a smirk.
Cadance seemed to breathe a sigh of sadness, and she looked at me with a smile, "Yes, you are very smart for your age."
"What do you mean by that?" I asked defensively.
I suddenly had a really volatile question come to mind, which would answer my questions easily. "How old is Flurry?" I asked cautiously.
Cadance hummed, "She’s only fifteen; you’re not so different."
I felt my brain slowly connecting the dots. And a feeling of dread rose up in my chest: "She did not act like a fifteen-year-old, though."
Shining Armor seemed to take a bit of offense to that. But he didn’t deflect with anger; he remained rather respectful. "She acts perfectly for her age; in fact, she’s quite smart for still being so young."
"When does somebody become an adult in your society?" I asked as I grasped my forehead with one hoof.
Cadance thought for a moment, "I’d consider a pony to be entering adulthood at say… thirty-five? Sometimes forty."
Well, that’s unfortunate. My one trump card was citing my real age in case I was captured. But it turns out that my real age is still very young in their society. That’s just the problem with alien worlds, isn’t it?
Cadance shook her head and said, "Regardless…" She began with a sigh, "We’d really love to help you."
"Great! Then buy me a train ticket." I said with a small amount of hope, as my head was spinning. "Preferably somewhere warm."
Cadence grimaced. "It is quite cold outside, isn’t it? Have you been doing alright?"
I wanted to leave this conversation so badly, but I really had no way of doing so. Silence reigned long enough that Cadance continued, "You haven’t had any trouble with your magic, getting food, or finding a warm place to sleep?"
The way she said it made it immediately apparent that she was challenging me. She wanted me to confess that I was miserable and that I needed her help. And then whenever I owed her, she’d make my life a living nightmare. I wasn’t falling for that again. "And if I said yes, what would you say?" I challenged her idea right back.
Cadance stopped in surprise for a moment and continued. Seemingly, she wanted to move on from the topic, "I feel responsible for you. Since my daughter is the one that brought you here. You’re more than welcome to stay here in the castle and-"
"No can do." I interrupted. "I don’t really want to get caught up in all of this world’s royal affairs, and I actually quite like living on the streets. Boxes are actually quite comfortable."
Shining Armor raised his brow at me, "You’re living in a box?" He asked with alarm.
"Please," Cadance practically pleaded as she took a few steps forward. "I’d feel so awful if something happened to you, dear. And I know it’s very sudden and scary, but… I really wouldn't mind so much having another filly to look after." She actually seemed excited by the idea for a moment. "You can think of this as a new start! And I finally get a new foal to fawn over."
She must’ve noticed my exceedingly darker expression, as she quickly tried to lighten the mood as she laughed. "Because, y’know, princess of love and everything. But I don’t have nearly enough people to show it to-"
"No," I said firmly.
Cadence sighed sadly. "You don’t still think we assume you to be a changeling trying to harm us, do you?"
I shook my head, "I don’t. And I still refuse to stay."
Shining chimed in, "I’ll respect your decision, Kieran. As long as you can provide a worthwhile explanation as to why."
Who did this stallion think he was? I could tell by the expression on his face that he was stubborn. The longer I waited to reply, the worse my argument would sound. I started slowly, but I don't think I sounded very convincing in my reply. "I’m sorry… I just… don’t need anybody’s help. I’m used to being on my own." I said with an affirmative nod.
Wait, that last bit was probably going to make them even less likely to release me.
Cadence was closer than I expected. "Kieran, honey…" She waited a few moments, and my eyes slowly drifted over her. "You don’t have to be alone. Okay?"
She smiled warmly and said, "If you want space, that’s fine. But please let us help. Please stay with us."
I suddenly noticed just how close she’d gotten; she was nearly within touching distance as she leaned down and watched me carefully. "I can teach you everything about the world; you won’t have to live out in that cold any longer. You’ll get warm meals and have two parents to look after you."
What was she saying? Was this princess actually being serious? She practically just offered to adopt me on the spot.
I tried to quell the growing heat in my chest as my breathing speed increased. It wasn’t quite a panic attack; I just didn’t know how to handle emotions like these very well. Suddenly, the mare touched my head, brushing a strand of hair out of my eyes. "You don’t have to suffer alone, honey."
My mind finally caught up to what was transpiring, "Please, stop lying to me." I said as I recoiled away from her. I turned my head, "You want something I don’t have."
Cadence looked at me with pure despair, "The only thing I want is to see you happy. After everything you’ve gone through."
"Stop lying!" I yelled loudly, which echoed through the entire throne room. "Nobody ever just… does things out of the kindness of their heart. Everybody wants something when they do something good for others!"
"That’s not true!" Cadence started.
"But it is! Even the nicest person in the world would feel disappointed if their kindness wasn’t reciprocated in some fashion over time. They know someone will write about them, word will spread that they are nice, and then others will flock to give them praise."
Cadence recoiled as her ears folded against her head, and tears welled up in her eyes. "But… I just-"
"They’re all liars! They want recognition, money, or to simply make themselves feel better before they go to sleep at night. It’s all fake, every little bit of it. Love and kindness are fake concepts, built on a bundle of lies and deception that people like to tell each other." I breathed deeply as I paused. "So, I’m sorry, princess; I politely decline your generous offer." I said with a short sneer.
With my final words said, I lit my horn with a buildup of energy. I hadn’t quite figured anything out about how this stupid horn or magic powers worked. But I did know that whenever I prodded at the new appendage on my head, it would eventually grow until the buildup was too much.
"Kieran, wait!" Cadance said with a hint of desperation.
Almost instantly after lighting my horn, a loud explosion happened. And left in my wake was a large cloud of smoke.
It wasn’t actually an explosion, I had just found out that the only thing my dumb horn was useful for was throwing out the smoke bomb to end all smoke bombs. It was useful in my regular escapes from guards and such, and I was very thankful that the princess seemed none the wiser until it was too late.
I used that small moment of surprise and the time that she’d be reeling and coughing from my sudden disappearance to turn around and bolt. I ran as fast as I could towards the door as Shining Armor shouted, "Kieran, stop!"
The guards, I'll give them credit, began to block the door. But I was already charging another explosion in my horn, which went off right as I got within view. They all coughed wildly as they bumped into each other and searched through the smoke wildly.
One guard actually managed to get his magic on me—the same one who’d brought me here. "Oh no, you’re not running off again!"
I felt a hint of fear, but luckily for me, one of the guards who was slightly panicking bumped into him, making him lose concentration for a second. I was dropped from his grasp and quickly charged one more smoke bomb, and after it went off, I spat at the guard rather childishly. "Better luck next time," I said cheerily.
More guards began to block the main exit. I panicked and looked at the window to my right, and without a second thought, I launched myself through it.
Now, I must’ve forgotten that I lacked any knowledge on how to use my wings. And alas, the drop from the castle isn’t a small one. I screamed a bit as the ground rushed at me, but thankfully I landed in a bush. Which, in this odd universe, seemed to translate to a perfectly soft, cushiony landing.
I was dazed, but that was about it. I stared smugly up at the castle, which had confused guards yelling and coughing. I held in a giggle at the sound of them crashing into each other.
I heard a loud gasp of horror from the castle as Cadance seemed to enter the hallway where I’d just been. "Kieran, sweetie, where are you!?" She called around worriedly.
Thankfully, the window was too small for Cadance to fly out of if she caught on. I quickly got to my hooves; even through the dizziness, my horn stopped glowing, and I bolted back into town. Cadance called to me worriedly from the castle, "Please don’t run!"
I got back to my alley after hiding out in different places for long periods of time. Pickles was already waiting for me. I hid in my box as Pickles followed me in and allowed me to pet him to calm myself.
I don’t know why I let what she said get to me so hard. I even felt a few tears prick at my eyes, but I held them in. I was desperately hoping to stay away from the royal family. What did Cadance have to gain from being that nice? Surely it was all an act, and once she had me in her grasp, she’d banish me back into the cosmos from which I came. Brainwash me to be a perfect princess, or any number of awful things.
I heard the sound of many guards running past my hiding spot, which never failed me. To be fair to them, though, this alley’s entrance was practically inaccessible unless you were foal-sized. And even harder to spot from above. I smiled slightly with a sigh of relief and said, "I just have to be more careful, Pickles. Why don’t you go beg for me? You’re adorable."
I sat in silence as I thought of my yelling at Cadance. I'd definitely provided a little bit too much information there. But I'd felt so heated and couldn't keep it from coming out. After all, I'd had two weeks of brooding over the cause of my death. I had to admit, it felt a little bit better to have yelled my thoughts out. Rather than silently cursing myself for being naive and childish in my previous life.
I wouldn't make that mistake again.
Pickles gave me a satisfied meow as he laid against my side and began to purr. The sensation slowly lulled me to sleep that night. But I did stay awake for a little bit longer; the night sky was beautiful that night.
The only way I could ever escape from the more and more brutal nights was in my dreams. Where I’d often dream of normal, nonsensical things. My dreams were more volatile than I assumed almost anyone else's to be. One moment I’d be a human again, then the next I’d be in my new filly body. Yet oddly, both felt natural. Probably due to the time I’ve already spent in my new body. Surviving on the streets as a new species forces you to learn quickly.
Which brought only more questions, none of which I was willing to entertain the thoughts of right now. Male, female—what even am I anymore? I couldn't be asked to think about it.
"You're awfully quiet tonight; might something have happened?"
I sighed loudly and kept my hoof firmly planted against my chin. "Hello, demon."
"Must you always refer to me in that way? My name is Luna, Princess Luna."
"Hello, Princess Demon." I replied sharply, much to her annoyance as she sighed loudly.
I looked over at the dark blue pony with a mane of stars. A white moon with a black splotch plastered on her flank. A dark crown befitting a princess of the night. She held herself in high regard, and there was always something so ethereal about her appearance. She was certainly a breathtaking sight to behold.
If she wasn’t always so nosey.
I rolled my eyes leisurely. "Must you always show up whenever I want some peace?"
Luna circled me as I sat on my old human bed, which nonsensically floated around my old room without a care. "Yes, I shall. Especially after your most recent escapade."
I snorted through my nose thoroughly, "What, do you have the pink witch on speed dial? What’s your deal?"
Luna huffed and raised a brow at my words. I learned quickly that I could just talk like any regular human, and she’d get confused after only a few sentences. You know, just throw in some human abbreviations, adages, and proverbs, and it’d make her head start spinning. I wasn’t lying or anything; she just didn’t understand my words. Acting like I didn’t know how to speak more ‘pony-like’ was my only advantage with someone who could invade my dreams.
"She is not a "witch," as you say. And if by "speed dial," you are referring to our timely communication, then yes, I may very well have her on speed dial." She said with confidence.
I actually let out a small laugh at that. She may not understand everything I say, but I’d be wrong to say she hadn’t gotten used to my words enough to decipher them occasionally. She smiled at me before sitting down by my side. "You know what I’m here for. I humbly request, in my niece’s place, that you return to safety at her castle."
Normally, I’d stay silent and ignore her and any attempt she made to coerce me into forfeiting my mind and existence as I knew it. But something about tonight made me actually entertain the idea of talking with her. "I bet she’s oh so worried!" I said mockingly with a scoff.
"She is," Luna said with a most serious stare. "Why, I could see tear stains on the scroll she sent me before the night. She cares most desperately for your safety, Kieran. She was begging for me to make sure you hadn’t injured yourself from thy fall from her castle window."
"You're her aunt, right?" I asked suddenly, with a raised brow.
She nodded, and I quickly continued. "Good, then I assume she trusts your word well."
"Where are you taking this?" She asked as she put a hoof to her head exasperatedly.
I smirked, "Talk her down. Tell her I’m safe by myself and that I can take care of myself. You know."
"And why in Tartarus would I do that?" Luna said with a wide-eyed expression.
I stood from my spot and paced on the bed. "Because I've been in good spirits, you’ve practically interrogated me every night. Do I seem to be living an oh-so-terrible life, in your honest opinion?"
She paused for a few moments, "You do have considerable resolve. For a child."
"I’m not a child," I reminded her with a huff.
She scoffed right back with a raised brow, saying, "You could be hundreds of years old, and you’d still be a child in my eyes. What is it you always say to me again?" Her eyes lit up. "Oh yes. Suck it up, Buttercup. Am I saying that correctly?"
Once again, she made me smile as I held in a laugh. "Then you’ll help get her off my back?"
Luna returned her grimace and avoided eye contact with me. "I can’t do that, Kieran." My mood fell as I flopped back down against the bed. She continued with a soft voice. "I agree with Cadance wholeheartedly. You aren’t just some pony to be left by the wayside—not that any deserve to be—not only are you a lost soul given new life, but an alicorn. If anything, you need a mentor. Being an alicorn is no easy feat."
"You teach me magic, then." I told her sourly. "Then I’ll easily be able to take care of myself."
She shook her head, "Neigh, we do not have nearly enough time in this realm. You could simply stop being stubborn and accept help for once to fix that issue."
"Fat chance, demon of darkness." I said half-jokingly.
Without a chance to react, Luna laid down beside me and nuzzled my face. I quickly recoiled and looked at her in surprise as she looked at me solemnly and said, "I shall make you open up to others’ love. If it takes a hundred—neigh—a thousand nights."
I scoffed half-heartedly, "From random ponies I don’t know? Then you’ll be waiting two thousand nights, probably more."
She smiled warmly, "I’d still be there, whenever that time comes."
Right, immortal, ruler of the night... I had no doubt in my mind that she meant those words. Which was exhausting, yet admirable.
The weirdest part of these dreams was how fast they seemed to progress. It never felt like I was talking for more than five minutes before I’d return to the waking world. I should really ask Luna how that works, especially if she visits many dreams a night, as she has alluded to doing.
Not much longer after that, I woke up. With my eyelids nearly frozen to my face and a chill in my spine. I breathed out deeply, seeing my breath heating the air around me. And no Pickles, who had mysteriously disappeared wherever he went in the middle of the night.
Flurry Heart sat on her balcony with a blanket firmly wrapped around herself as she stared up at the night sky. And the colors of an aurora danced in the sky above the Crystal Empire. Down below were hundreds of homes, with smoke billowing from chimneys and lights on inside as everyone was in a cheery mood. The Hearth’s Warming Eve decorations amongst the city were her favorite things to look at as the holiday grew closer. But tonight, the sky happened to be more beautiful.
"You know, I have everything I’ve ever wanted. But… it feels really bad." She waited for a moment, then sighed. "Because… the one thing I’ve always wanted is real, but I can’t…"
"It’s stupid, I know." Flurry said with a small laugh, looking down at her hooves for a few moments. "It just hurts."
The longer the silence lasted, the more Flurry felt tears build up in her eyes. "I just don’t get it. We’re both so lonely; why can’t we just fix each other’s sadness?"
Flurry released a loud sigh and looked up into the sky again. "If it did work out, I’d be the happiest filly. I just want to talk to them more than anything."
Flurry giggled into her hooves, "I know. It’s silly. But it’s the truth."
Her eyes lit up as another wave of color washed across the sky. She hadn’t even noticed when another had entered. And only realized it when another wing wrapped around her and she looked up to see her mother. She had a look of sadness, but Flurry was happy to see that there was still hope in her eyes. In fact, she hadn’t seen a more determined look on her mother’s face in a very long time. Not a word was spoken between them as she returned her attention toward the heavens.
After all, the night sky was beautiful that night.