//------------------------------// // Can You Forgive Me? // Story: Lonely Murderer // by uniquecorn //------------------------------// She remembered one pegasus who didn’t end up a victim but a witness. Glad that she escaped turning into a bloody mess, but she also remembered what her vile self told the lucky kindness mare. “I know where you live! I’ll get you someday!” Fluttershy must be traumatized after witnessing what Pinkie’s been executing, frightened of what her friend was then, vigilant of when that despicable personality will have sought her. On top of that, physical harm was done to her scaredy friend. The throwing knife plunged into the back of Fluttershy’s right hind leg, opening an oozing wound that caused the nerves used for screaming. But she had to flee fast enough not to get caught and thus, had to endure sharp agony all the way to her cottage. Pinkie Pie immediately regretted what she did to her, those events led her to ponder about her friend’s extra shelter more than what she’s ever given before. Hopefully, it’s not too late, the fear of Fluttershy’s wound already infected or her deciding to move to somewhere far away from Ponyville. No, she can’t let any of those things happen. “Fluttershy, I hope you’re okay. Can you ever forgive me after what happened in the… basement?” She gaslighted her internally, not verbally allowing her friend to make her lobes stand, as she approached the cottage where the pegasus abided. Decided that it was appropriate to pay her a visit, which meant displaying the face of an attacker in front of a fugitive. Without further context, this would potentially lead her to believe the murderer came to bite her.  How is she supposed to convince her otherwise? Seemed like there was nothing to manage that query, besides barging in and hoping Pinkie’s acknowledgment would placate Fluttershy. The vegetated bungalow openings were distinctly shut, presumably to attempt begging ‘keep out’ for who she thinks will come to bite her in the neck. Pinkie could see how that incident awakened her defensive mode and it pinched her that she barely escaped from death. “Forgive me, please.” She was hesitant, but she must make this visit. Absorb the unputrid nitrogen and make the birthday wish and she’s…ready. Knock knock, let the devil in, but benevolent unlike she’s ever been. Meanwhile, Fluttershy was in the middle of making warm noodles made with, for and of her adopted wilderness within her nest. She’d undoubtedly love to burn the horrible memories with crimson if they weren’t already burned in her already. But, that’s why she attempted meditation for the day and a half after the fact, until she heard her door. “Ah! Oh, um, who could that be? I hope it’s not…” Jumped by the knocks she was, being occupied with her sanctuary that she was lost in reality. Approaching leisurely to her front porch, anticipating anypony but that pink assassin, Fluttershy would’ve deemed herself dead if that mare came, she hoped to have unlocked the egress composedly. Nervous, wasn’t she? She dragged her hoof to her handle and slowly pulled the door without calling for her visitor’s name. Door was opened until a crack, enough to reveal the pony behind it for both parties. Fluttershy immediately recognized the parallel mane and immediately slammed the door and hugged it against her back. “No! Please, no! Not now!” If Pinkamena doesn’t act early, the pegasus would’ve chosen to escape right away with her chances. No, she won’t let it happen, she came for her friend’s sake and not for her blood. “Fluttershy! Wait! I’m not gonna… hurt you!” No way was she gonna believe that first line, she was planning and going to kill her based on that incident. “I’ve seen what you did, I’ve heard what you said! You’re here so that you can end it!” End it? End what Pinkie wanted to accomplish? Committing democide? Betraying everypony she thought betrayed her? Sounded like what she just did alright. “That wasn’t me! I don’t know what came over me! I made a mistake!” “Huh?” Fluttershy ceased her shivers upon hearing what Pinkie admitted. Murder can be a mistake? Causing somepony gone forever was a mistake? And what does she mean by coming over her? “They didn’t die in vain, but… they died because of something stupid! It was wrong! I was wrong! I just came here to see if you’re alright, Fluttershy!” No, she couldn’t believe it. For what reason Pinkie had that was mistaken, it can’t be the reason. No, she didn’t. But words came from the mouth of the mare who performed the deed. Fluttershy’s neck cocked behind, her eyelids slanted, jaws gritted in her open frown. She was a little mad, but not psycho-mad, she figured Diane came to talk more about it. Well, she and the rest were looking for answers, finally. Determined to discover, she stood up, turned toward the door and ceased her cowardice when she opened the door like a normal pony. Seeing her “friend” frown wasn’t enough to at least have a little mercy, yet. And she still didn’t feel safe with even the benevolent Pinkie, she can’t trust if she is benevolent, yet. “Just come in, Pinkie, but know that I still can’t trust you.” Pinkie expected something like that or along the lines. She knew she couldn’t simply earn Fluttershy’s assurance after what she’s done. Even she doesn’t know if she could trust herself. Would it frighten the pink mare if inside her mind, her intentions were to finish her off? Look, if this kind pegasus somehow bled in her hooves, she would’ve been hopeless and won’t even try to acquit herself. “I know. I understand.” The bitter winged kept staring at the guest as she walked through the threshold, decided “The Stare” would be too much for her however, thankfully. Once approached the arch leaving the foyer, Fluttershy focused on the door to shut it. Pinkamena took a gawk at the cottage admiring the incomplexity of decorations like she’s never seen such fragility before. Butterflies, flowers, hearts, spades and shades of cool colors between buttermilk and neptune. Calm and serene and in contrast to that sordid dark basement she emerged from. She dared to relax her flank on the closest couch, the backrest with a cardioid top. All the animals Fluttershy owned were seen playing in the sun through a window, at least they won’t be whaffing any lingering stenches of metal like a detector of red events. Even though she was upset about what her visitor admitted, she still thought it’d anyway be kind to provide her sustenance. “Can I get you anything, Pinkie?” The responder thought about it looking away from those kind blue eyes hers didn’t have. Eye to eye again, she had an answer. “Do you have any herbal tea I can soothe my mind with?” Understood, she did. So she entered her kitchen to make Pinkie’s selection of brew. As she passed through the stone brick arch, she also exposed her mummified hind leg to a witness’s point of view. The fact that she was the culprit behind the limb made her flinch, she can feel the cold blade as if it happened to herself on the same limb. She launched the blade at her at Celestia knows how many fig newtons, but certainly enough to form a kitchen knife incision. Hopefully, all she got was a temporary wound instead a permanent scar. If she did get the latter though, she’d feel much worse for the mare who edited the body. “Fluttershy, what have I caused you?” Diane delayed discussing deciding to describe her deliberations after her decided drink dropped in. She fiddled with her cloves as lingering ear-piercing whistling occurred from inside the other room, kettle blowing anger out awaiting one of those leaves to dissolve in its contents. Eventually, Fluttershy emerged flapping with a tray in her functional forehooves, the platter was settled on the table between the sofas, tisane cascaded from the spout to the brim and then the pegasus settled on the far side of the other sofa Pinkie didn’t occupy, all while keeping furrowed eyelids. “The tea’s still hot, so be careful.” Lunged for the glass with her bare hoof. As warned, the pink limb sensed a different kind of warmth upon contact, but at least it wasn’t a hot potato. As she attempted to exhale repeatedly into the teacup’s surface, it was a matter of yearning for what she came for: the apology. Guess she should start by addressing the ultimate thing she did to her. “How’s your leg feeling? Is it…?” “It still stings a little bit. Every time anything happens to it, it stings a little bit.” But it might’ve been burning ever since the wound was fresh out of the ground. It should never be glossed over, it was Pinkie’s fault and she should care more. “W-was it a wound or a scar, F-Fluttershy?” “You made a wound, Pinkie, so no need to concern.” That’s a relief, thank heavens she graduated medical school for vets, she can identify scars even if they haven’t formed yet. Like Fluttershy told her, she doesn’t need to conc-iliate. “No, Fluttershy, I have to concern. I threw the knife at you. I’m…so sorry, you don’t deserve the wound.” Fluttershy noticed she was being apologetic, but not enough to balance the scales between disapprobation and empathy. At least she noticed she was trying, she can provide some form of reaction. “At least you’ve acknowledged it now. Thanks, Pinkie.” Pinkamena noticed the sedate’s response was a bit bitter and she understood, so she won’t bother asking why she said it like that. Her cup should be warm enough to touch her muzzle without enflaming her throat. The flowery liquid coursed through her veins pumping the substances to where it tried to cool down her already jumbled mind. Felt sympathy, she missed just the nice providence of Fluttershy’s brews. Chills up her back spine as she reminisced having cute tea parties with the only equine in Ponyville who knows how to arrange tea parties. Pinkie Pie’s parties were all about happiness and exuberance while Fluttershy’s parties were presented with affluence and without the need to roam around and were opinionately exceptional to straight-maned. She’d hate to be the cause of its termination to lust for another cup. Any moment now, she needs to explain the reason for being disgustingly comfortable murdering those endearing defenseless innocents. Someone here has to bring it up first, they can’t keep forgetting the horrible nightmares “Alright, Pinkie, enough stalling. I know why you’re here, to enlighten me with your account of what you’ve done.” Her indecisiveness wasted a couple of minutes as Pinkie thought about how to begin confessing that she frankly destroyed them. Fluttershy decided to help develop her words, but she wasn’t playing around. “Pinkie, why did you kill our friends? I’m listening.” Bewildered by the fact she didn’t stutter when she articulated the word ‘kill’, for she recognized the status quo. Therefore, substitutions for associations with executions are unnecessary in these conversations. Fine, so Pinkamena operated lungful respiration to prepare herself and summarized. “Because I thought…” She didn’t complete her first sentence before she hesitated again, believing her answer was gonna be stupid. In her angelic mind, she knew it was amoral, but pretending to be justified while aloud elucidating was difficult. Fluttershy was not willing to let her flee, intimidatingly staring the prisoner down. The pink muzzle pulled away as she spoke. “It was stupid, Fluttershy. I was corrupt, I was vicious, I can’t name what I’ve done, it’s hard.” “It’s not that hard to simply say something and I don’t care if it’s stupid. Pinkie, all I wanted…no, all we longed for was the truth, any info that you carry, only you can inform us, or what’s left of us. I didn’t want to have to force you to do that, honestly, but after witnessing what you’ve done to us, I have no choice. You owe us.” She does, doesn’t she? Of course, she knew that she owes, so why does she still hesitate, huh? Fault and guilt lied on her, she fated herself to pay the pegasus a visit and an explanation. All only happened because of her. Her, her, her. She deserved to be overwhelmed by her name painted all over everything that happened. Fluttershy was correct, stupid or not, she has to stop hiding. “After I couldn’t get you to come to my…event, I…wanted to know why.” Notice Pinkie was uncomfortable with the word ‘party’ or ‘afterparty’. Fluttershy understood what she was referring to. “So, I brought Spike over, thinking I’ll get the information from him.” “And what did you get?” Here was what she thought was the ridiculous part. “My friends disliked my events…and myself as a friend.” Fluttershy reacted by raising her still-slanted lashes, half of what Pinkie prophesied. “What? What did Spike say?” “...What I told him to say?” Disbelief on Fluttershy after, entirely what Pinkie prophesied. Does the pegasus expect the mare of jokes to believe the dragon’s words that actually came from her like speaking to a megaphone aimed at the messenger and absorbing her own message? Does she dare explain the insanity that occurred at the party? Is it worth exposing her ab capabilities she knew were too far? What would Fluttershy think of her if she found out she was friends with processed wheat and a piece of fleece? She decided to skip that part. “I…thought about seeking revenge, but…I swear it wasn’t what I had in mind.” Fluttershy helped fill in the blanks, she knew where it was going. “You somehow found your weapon and prepared your plan in the basement?” Pinkie nodded. “I…I m-murdered…my f-friends.” “And then? What happened after you killed them?” She didn’t want to mention the other party she celebrated, but then she wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight knowing there was one thing she refrained from telling. “I…threw an event with…their dead bodies.” Yep, no one can believe she can be so messed up on several elevators. A more chaotic alternative would be if she brought a camera and embarrass herself in front of their skeletons. She felt even more terrible for Fluttershy that she had to hear and imagine that disturbing image. Thankfully, she can manage. “What made you stop?” “It was a nightmare I had last night.” “A nightmare? About what?” Pinkamena remembered everything her formidable perception distinguished, the legitimate motivation for commitment and the unspeakable consequences. For a while, she won’t believe that no resurrection ritual exists even though her dream told her so. She can be sure that a quartet had been slaughtered, but she can’t be sure if entropy is in effect. So far, all Pinkie’s doing was recovering, she hadn’t begun searching yet, sweating that they might be right. “M-my friends…as ghosts. They came…and explained everything. They were really…v-vexed that…they…m-mustered the courage to…reciprocate on me.” How dreadful of a dream, Fluttershy imagined. Seemed to loosen her negativity toward her visitor a little bit, her mouth still frowned and her creases had a weaker tension. For someone watching from the outside, her facial expressions were untraceable, especially to Pinkie. “Oh, I’m sorry that happened to you. Well, you must be up early after that. Did you do anything during that time?” “I immediately rushed into my basement and I mourned for them. I…I s-saw what I did, I r-realized what I did, I remembered what I did. We…reminisced about how I’m glad I once was their friend and that we couldn’t get to do everything we could’ve done together. Heh heh.” Pinkie giggled but unlike how she usually laughs or her murderous chortle. It was at this point, she felt her feelings beginning to flow out. Fluttershy was also still pessimistic, she understood what Pinkie experienced in her mindset and she understood she wanted to apologize, she felt bad but felt it wasn’t enough. “I just can’t believe you would do such a thing, Pinkie! After all those friendship problems we dealt with and learned from, why would you assume that we don’t want to be friends with you anymore? I don’t know if you knew, but you missed our party because of you. No wonder we were wondering where Rainbow Dash went. If only you’d spared her life, she would be your first chance out of four to arrive punctually. But no, you stabbed and stabbed and stabbed!” “R-Rainbow…” Upon uttering the name of the first casualty dead in those magenta hooves, the pipes started to leak. The weeps were released into salting the tea held in Pinkie’s hooves, her lips quivering as her tremulous sobbing was freely articulated. Embarrassed that she cried for the fourth time today, though that didn’t matter right now. “I…I’m s-sorry…I was s-so…heartless. I…I saw the p-party…that I didn’t come to, it was p-perfect, I would’ve l-love to play there, but…” Fluttershy lamented about scolding her, now she felt more miserable when she saw Pinkie’s willingness to cry. She perceived the gloomy mare as feeling deserved, but morally, that’s unacceptable. “R-Rainbow Dash…told me I’d regret it, but I…carried on. I wanted to b-believe that there’s a way to reverse it…so that I can see them again and repent, but…” Her tears weren’t dripping, they were running. Finally, Fluttershy accepted the apology, she had a little smile and her eyelids were creaseless. Decided it’d be fair if she represented her kindness. Hey, despite what she perceived Pinkie yesterday, the fact remains that they were outstanding friends in the past. And if there’s a problem, mental or otherwise, then it should be aided, even if she almost died trying to tell the tale. While those misty eyes were shut, Fluttershy delicately approached the despairing pony. Her flank collapsed on the remaining regions of Pinkie’s bench, the cup she held was taken and settled on a side table. As she sensed with her back, her eyes widened to see her listener right beside her. “It’s okay, Pinkie. I’m sorry it happened. You were late to your senses, you couldn’t control or stop yourself, but you’re aware of everything that has happened. Here, my prayers ever since I survived…the incident, I’m happy.” “How can you forgive me after what I’ve done? I was disgusted with myself, what I did was grotesque, unforgettable, unforgivable.” “I beg to differ, I’ll forgive you. Because you were my good friend before, no adversities will correct that statement. And, Pinkie, don’t forget my spirit of harmony.” True to her representative, the element of kindness was, happy to offer her forgiveness. Oh, compared to the element of laughter who was yet to represent hers. Hopefully, when the hard part’s done, she'll come around. Let it all out, she was committed, didn’t care that it was embarrassing. Don’t worry, Fluttershy is the pony to be around somepony in tears, her presence is symbolic of wanting to comfort. Pinkie plopped her pink pate on the pinioned pony’s peritoneum puddling her pelt. She didn’t mind, she could wash it later, but her friend needed the kindness, the embrace around her occiput. It had been her roughest day and Fluttershy understood, acknowledging herself of murder and frightened of the aversion of the martyrs who reckoned her would’ve been hard. “Our friends might’ve gotten mad at you, but I don’t think they were righteous. And please, promise me that you won’t suicide or sacrifice because of this.” “I…I w-won’t. I’m…s-sorry I…c-caused you to think that…” “No, don’t apologize. I just wanted to know.” This never would’ve happened if Fluttershy had been slain for good. Murderer could’ve struck her first instead of Rarity’s pharynx, or the basement’s threshold could’ve failed to break open. It would take a miracle for the pegasus to survive, but apart from the limping limb, here she is. Pinkie liked her calm company and she would hate it if one day she decided to compromise. As of now, the only pony she can rely on, the only pony who can believe her is Fluttershy. Fluttershy encouraged the miserable, the lonely and depressed to take her time emptying her fluid ducts. The poor unfortunate soul cried for another two minutes musing on the past when her friends were alive and dreaming the consequences without the macabre before she was left with a scatter of sniffs. “Calm down, Pinkie. I’m here for you.” “Do you think there is hope that they’ll come back, Fluttershy?” She never believed that there was any hope for the return of the elements. Death in cold blood was never witnessed in Equestria, though funerals do happen. All she believed was ‘the dead is dead’, but Pinkie seemed to think otherwise. Fluttershy understood that her friend wished she could turn back time to the good old days. “I don’t know, Pinkie. I just didn’t have the nerve to think about it. We just hold funerals for ponies who died of aging and we never had to revive anypony. Murder is different and, well, yours is the only one.” “How am I gonna tell Spike, the CMC, the Princesses? I just don’t want to make the situation worse than it is. Will I end up in the dungeon or on the moon because of what I’ve done? I…I don’t want either of those.” “Well, eventually, you have to tell them the honest truth. You can choose when they can know, but you can’t keep it secret forever. Hey, they won’t punish you if you acknowledge your actions. And if they would punish you, don’t worry, I’ll defend you because I know you want to do the right thing.” Fluttershy truly is a friend, everypony is a friend, except for perhaps a certain griffin. Maybe she wouldn’t submit her motive to the public and make them fear Pinkie enduringly, she can take baby steps and select a few who can swallow it. Fluttershy glanced at her walled clock and realized the discussion entailed a whole hour. “It’s about lunchtime. Can I get you something to eat? I have plenty of groceries.” “I would like just a usual sandwich, please. Maybe two?” “Alright, I’ll make two sandwiches. Then, maybe after lunch, you can sleep in my room, you must’ve been tired after waking up from your nightmare.” Pinkie nodded before Fluttershy went inside the other room to prepare a sandwich. She’s right about the pink pony needing to sleep, she woke up very early because of her nightmare and refused to go back to bed after visiting her victims. She would prefer sleeping in her friend’s bed instead of her own nearby the crime scene. Hopefully, she’ll get a dream this time…hopefully. Celestia and Luna ransacked their archive for any reference to whatever scratched the young princess’s cheek. Surely, there existed an article that explains what must be accomplished upon the appearance of a ‘locked dream’. Even the white alicorn admitted that for being the head of the kingdom, the economy earned to build Canterlot provided an enormous library of books. When a pony wants specific information about a concept, it was helpful that everything was sorted in alphabetical order, but not so helpful that everything was sorted based on their title and not the synopsis. “This library was supposed to be for Twilight since she was so studious when I met her. It wasn’t meant for us to forage, that’s my student’s attribute.” “Perfect, she would be appropriate for this and she’d be happy to help her friend, Pinkie Pie. When do you think she’ll approach us?” During Luna’s breakfast, Celestia thought cleverly to epistolize her faithful disciple, but her response didn’t come. She even dared to write three more paragraphs, pardoning Spike’s inflamed gullet wherever he is before deciding to reply to the sender about the mystery of where Twilight is plus his condition. “I’ve sent her a couple of letters already, but it seemed that something had happened to her. It’s been about two hours since my last message and I don’t want to displease Spike unless it’s urgent.” “Twilight Sparkle has disappeared?” Strange, one pony can’t just simply vanish from existence. The only way for that to be possible would be via magic or was it an unfortunate kidnapping? Maybe there was a villain they encountered before that came back and caught her? Or, tant mieux, in terms of estimation, there was a connection. “Could it be that Twilight’s disappearance is related to Pinkie’s nightmare I assume I saw?” “If that’s so, then I fear her whereabouts, something bad must’ve happened to her.” “Well, we need to wait until the night of the gala so that Pinkie can speak with us without scaring her. Does that sound like a plan, sister?” But first, they must flip through every book about dreams and nightmares to understand what they might find out. Since such a mysterious phenomenon existed, there must be at least one record of it. Eventually, sure enough, 10 minutes after entering the library after breakfast determined to find it, Luna believed she discovered the exact pages. “Tia, I think found it.” “Really? What section did you find it in?” “Uh, the fourth row of the Q-U bookshelf titled ‘Truth Revealed by Nightmares vol No.6’ and on page 66.” “Well, that’s an ominous heading. Mind if you share with me what you found?” It might imply that Pinkie’s nightmare was revealing a truth about something. Her own truth? Does she own a secret nopony suspect her of? Now the princesses became suspicious of her, but they didn’t want to assume the worst quagmire she found herself in. But if they do learn what she was capable of, how are they gonna treat her?