Anon entered the confectionary, pushing open the door as the small bell above sounded his arrival with a light 'ding'.
The human immediately froze as the door close behind him. With all the bright colours and sweet smells, he had to let his brain process for a second. A string of vivid memories came rushing to him, memories of him feeling like crap because of his occupation, on his way home he would always stop by the local bakery. The food was great, the staff were always nice, and regulars were sweet and very chatty.
This memory, however, was interrupted when Anon felt something impact his chest hard enough to knock him off balance. years fighting made his instincts take over. Grabbing whatever hit him and using its momentum to slam it into the door with his forearm against its neck. Reeling his fist back to deliver a punch, Anon's eyes caught up with him and saw a bright pink pony with bright blue eyes smiling happily like a child. This slightly broke Anon.
Anon.EXE is not responding.
C/Users/Anon>System Report
Damage: Minimal | Opponent: Pony | Action: Counterattack |
Continue Action? (Y/N)
C/Users/Anon>N
Aborting current action completed
System requires restart
Restart now? (Y/N)
C/Users/Anon>Y
Restarting
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Restart Complete
Anon quickly pulled the forearm away that was pinning the pony to the door a few feet off the ground. The human quickly glanced around as the pink pony fell to the floor with a light thud, letting out a sigh of relief, the store seemed to be empty. He only had to defuse the situation with one pony.
The human looked back towards the pink pony to only see the empty foyer. "I think I have actually lost it this time." Anon mumbled as he tried to rationalize what just happened. He wasn't left long with his thoughts however when fluffy pink hair dangled down in front of him, followed by a smiling pink pony. "What did you lose? I lose things all the time hehe."
If Anon was not already in shock, he probably would have tried to throw her out a window. The two stared at each other, their faces inches apart. With his heart rate slowing down slightly, the human swiftly grabbed the mare by the scruff and held her out in front of him, to his surprise she was a lot lighter than she looked.
Said mare simply giggled, "You have very fast reflexes. I was all like 'I'm gonna make you my friend, friendship tackle!' And you were like 'Not today!' and slammed me against the door. I'm Pinkie Pie, what's your name?" The mare finished with an even bigger smile.
"Ok then, I'm Anonymous."
The humans stomach growled loudly, the pink mare giggling slightly in response.
"Somepony is hungry~" Pinkie said in a sing song voice, the mare jumped down from his grasp with relative ease as she headed behind the counter.
Anon stayed in the same position for a few seconds after the mare left, initially moving to open and close his hand as he tested his grip strength, he was taken out of his reflex testing when the mare spoke up from behind him.
"We had a cancelled order on some cupcakes, they haven't sold all that well either so help yourself." The pink mare pushed a box of cupcakes onto the counter next to the till, then disappeared into a side room.
Anon took one of the cupcakes and unwrapped it, smelling it first then taking a small bite. To say they were good was an understatement.
Taking a bite of his second cupcake, the human heard a familiar voice behind him.
"I bet that tackle did wonders for your ribs" Alex piped up, his comment dripping with sarcasm. The newcomer walked beside Anon, tying his long hair back into its signature ponytail, pushing himself onto the counter, letting his legs dangle.
"Glad you're here, could use a level head to keep me from going insane." Anon commented, rubbing his temples as he leant back against the counter. Just in time to see a pegasus mare open the door, creating a small ding from the bell above before stopping in the doorway, her eyes set on Anon. A few seconds pass that felt like hours until without a word, the pegasus slowly walked backwards out of the store, letting the door slowly close.
Sighing, the human turned to Alex. "I should probably leave sooner than later my presence here is not good for business I imagine."
"It's their loss if they don't want to make a new friend." Pinkie exclaimed loudly from the other room, the human jumping slightly as she spoke. Alex simply chuckled in response.
"So, how goes the friendship making with the local nutter?" Alex commented, now sat with his legs crossed.
The human turned around, grabbing another cupcake from the box. "I haven't ben skinned alive yet, so she can't be that bad, although being giving free shit is a bit weird."
"You're complaining about free stuff?" Alex questioned with a raised eyebrow.
Anon huffed before swallowing. "I never said I was complaining! I'm just so used to taking and being taken from that it's a weird experience."
"And pastel talking ponies isn't a weird experience?" Alex asked with a knowing grin.
The human rolled his eyes while waving his hand dismissively. "You know what I meant ya prick."
The pink mare finally emerged from the side room, now covered in crumbs and frosting. "Phew, that donut dozen was a doozy hehehe."
Pinkie moved from behind the counter to the shop floor with a cake on a plate balanced on her back, making her way to one of the display shelves by the window. After moving some items around to make it looked more appealing, the pink mare turned on the spot and gave the human a puzzled look. "Who were you talking to by the way?"
Anon drummed his fingers on the counter before turning around to face the mare. "You wouldn't believe me." The human spoke in lower tone as his eyes found the floor, a hint of sadness crossed his face.
"Are you talking to your friend that only you can see, and you don't know if you are slowly going insane or if he is some magical force taking form as part of your subconscious?" The pink pony said in one quick breath.
Anons mouth hung open as he stared at the mare in disbelief. "I thought Twilight was going to keep that a secret until she had done some tests or whatever."
Pinkie simply tilted her head with a confused look. "Keep what secret?"
"That's just a bit creepy." Alex commented in a lowered tone.
"Ok then, I think I'm gonna go. Thanks for the food, I will be sure to stop by some other time. Uh take care?" Anon spoke as he walked towards the door, Alex unfolding his legs and pushing himself off the counter to follow.
The pink mare simply smiled. " Okie Dokie Lokie. See you around Non non" Pinkie said waving to the human.
After leaving the confectionary, Alex walked besides Anon. "You have pet names now? Going a bit fast there aren’t ya?" Alex teased with a cocky grin.
Anon stopped in his tracks, slowly turning his head towards Alex. "When the fuck did you get so witty you little bastard" the human asked with an annoyed grin.
Alex let out a belly laugh as they continued walking.
"So we heading home then?"
"I want to visit the library first. I could use some basic magic books to help me with the tome Twilight gave me. Even with your translations I can barely understand it." Anon answered, stretching as they walked down the street. The human now seeming to ignore all other ponies around him while he talked to Alex.