There are a lot of nice things to wake up to.
The smell of breakfast cooking is one that immediately comes to mind. Food is always great and knowing you're going to start the day partaking of it is a great feeling. Birdsong, too, emerges as an example of the above point. Not the harsh, loud kind, of course, but the soft, delicate tones of the gentler species are usually quite a treat for the ears. Even one's alarm sound could be considered a positive thing, so long as one is aware that it lets them start the day on time and has had sufficient sleep to appreciate that fact.
I had begun countless days lying in bed, reveling in these and many other such sensations. I was far from a morning person, you see, and thus preferred to slowly arise from my often-turbulent slumber. It was for this reason that I never really partook of coffee or other such stimulating substances. I found that adrenaline tended to work much the same and quite a bit more effectively in many cases. Natural remedies, right?
In any case, the fact remained that there are many nice things to observe once you've finally been roused from the throes of slumber.
Waking up to two dinnerplate-sized lime green eyes staring down at you, however, is generally not considered 'nice.'
And, at least in my case, seeing that those eyes were filled with malice and had long lashes to boot certainly didn't help. Also, the mare's smile was downright creepy; what kind of maniac shows that many teeth?
Needless to say, I screamed like a little girl and lashed out with a foreleg, connecting solidly with her jaw.
The nurse recoiled away--though something told me it was from the force of my shout and not that of my hoof--glancing wildly about as if in search of witnesses. In the time allotted while she let me be, I gave my new body a quick examination, scanning for anything that might've been done to me.
It sounds weird when I put it that way, but trust me, I'd been through enough experiences to know that females had no restraint when it came to unconscious coworkers.
Luckily, nothing seemed too out of place, at least from what I knew of my previous examination. What was new were the bandages wrapped around my injured fetlock. I also noted the lack of another IV to replace the one that'd hurt me, but I had no time to ponder on that; I needed to turn my attention back to the approaching mare and see just how badly she had it out for me.
I noticed this was a different nurse than last time; she had a curly blue mane, yellowish coat, and white flank tattoo as opposed to...whatever the last one looked like. I was probably too focused on her gender to observe much else, plus the mild hysteria being in so much pain tended to put people in. I think it'd be quite accurate to say I had a long list of distractions, so you can't really blame me for not remembering the other nurse. As a matter of fact, this could very well be the same one; I hardly had any way to distinguish them, after all.
Ah, but now wasn't the time to be phasing out; the mare, apparently having bored of intimidating me from afar, was starting to approach.
"It's okay, little one. I'm not going to hurt you." I would have scoffed, but found my throat too constricted to get out anything save a sharp breath. The heart monitor's beeping sped up as she stepped forth to the left side of my bed, still grinning that ominous, toothy grin of hers.
Yeah, I didn't believe this lady for a second. No one with a shred of sanity left could produce a smile like that. And who the heck goes around addressing people with 'little one?' Sure, it helped confirm I was, in fact, inside a child's body, but those words were so downright creepy I couldn't help a shiver down my new spine. 'Little guy,' 'young'un,' 'small colt,' any number of other options each sounded far less sinister than what she'd chosen. Why, I'd bet anything she decided to go with the worst possible word combination in some sick attempt to scare me. Obviously, it was working quite well, something to which the still-increasing tempo of the heart monitor could attest.
Ah, but I was phasing out again and I needed to be fully present in order to weasel my way out of this.
The nurse stalked yet closer, walking slowly in an effective bid to make me tense up yet farther. That freaky smile never once left her face, letting her flat pony teeth shine proudly on full display. When she finally came to a leering stop, her head blocked the fluorescent light right above me, casting a shadow that made me squint to pick out the details of her face.
Jeez, could this lady be any more menacing? 'Not going to hurt me' my heated horse heinie.
Naturally, I was quaking like a jackhammer and felt about to pass out from hyperventilation. Fight or flight instincts took hold of the situation, saw just how much bigger and stronger she was compared to me, and decided to simply make me freeze instead.
"You don't have to worry. You're safe now," she said as she lifted her hoof and placed it on the mattress. I cringed away and tried to pull the covers over my head in some doomed attempt to ward her off, but utterly failed thanks to my lack of fingers.
"Please don't..." was my soft request, which came out in a tone I immediately hated for its frailty and childish inflection. I was half-certain that women could sense weakness and preyed directly upon it. I was fully certain that my best chance of survival here was to act tough and try to scare her away.
I just had to get my kid body under control first.
The nurse hesitated, cocking her head to the side at my words, but didn't relent in her ongoing assault. I considered making a run for it, but again, that course of action had no possible hope of success. My plan was clearly failing, but not a complete bust just yet. If I could get out a growl or maybe another shout like the last one, perhaps her prey instincts would take over?
It was then that I let out the most threatening roar I could muster, all but screaming myself hoarse with the effort.
Fortunelessly, all that came out was a high-pitched whimper.
I suppose, in that moment, this noise suited me better. There I lay, a cornered animal far from home, about to be taken advantage of in who knows how many ways. All I could do--indeed, my sole remaining choice in the events to come--was clench my eyes shut and prepare for the worst. Shivering under those too-tight covers and wildly hyperventilating, I began to once more reflect on my life.
You know, when I talk about myself this way, it's very easy to pretend the events are happening to someone else entirely. Taking a step back, trying to distance myself from it all, these are the strategies I've employed for as long as I can remember. I let my mind wander and take me away from the sting of the injuries or the sick games my coworkers loved to play. Travelling--waltzing, even--along mental tangents that distract and continue for figurative miles, keeping me from noticing the pains of reality. Again, it's quite effective and I do think you might agree if you tried it.
Now, you see, was the time to phase out.
I didn't have any other options.
There was no weaseling my way out of this one.
An especially loud noise, though, bade me return just the slightest bit to investigate. These kinds of situations never tended to elicit such sound from any source sans the victim and that definitely hadn't come from me.
After hesitantly prying open my watering eyes, I saw that the door had slammed open and my assailant was quite literally being dragged to it by the ear. I hadn't come back enough to hear any words, but I noticed my rescuer--another mare with a pure white coat and light pink mane--shouting quite animatedly into the ear she yanked towards the exit. From what little I could detect with lip reading, she seemed to be exchanging some...unkind words with my near-attacker.
I cringed away from this new pony's wrath, finally pulling the stubborn sheets over my head while the nurse was unceremoniously tossed out of the room. With all the haste of a handicapped sloth, I focused back in on my body, which allowed sounds to gradually return to my awareness. The heart monitor's hurried beeping was first to fade into my conscious, slowing unsteadily as I calmed down somewhat. My panting breaths, each obnoxiously loud in my little blanket bubble, also stood out to me.
Most important of all, however, were the approaching hoofsteps.
I yelped and slammed my eyes closed again when the sheets were ripped away from my grasp. I could feel this new mare's burning gaze on my skin, all but searing away at me while she decided what best to do. I think she might've even rolled me around with a hoof to get a good look at everything, but I couldn't be sure; I was already beginning to phase out in preparation for what was to come.
Imagine my surprise, then, when the mare simply placed the blanket back in my trembling hooves and stepped away.
A deep sigh and the shuffling of papers were the next sounds to reach my fluffy pony ears.
After that, only scribbling noises as she wrote on what I soon saw was a clipboard.
I watched, dumbstruck but not a little curious, as she held a pen in her teeth and used precise movements to jot something down. She was wearing a white lab coat, freshly pressed and somehow adapted to a quadrupedal form. I probably hadn't noticed it before due to it being the exact shade of her fur and the debilitating panic clouding my thoughts. My heart monitor was beginning to slow again and my breathing followed a similar pattern. I still kept my muscles tensed, though; I couldn't afford to relax just yet.
"I'm sorry about Nurse Snowheart. She's not very good with foals."
I flinched heavily when the mare, having finished her writing, addressed me directly. She sighed again at my response, turning and striding back to the door. I saw another muzzle poke in--curved, to my disappointment--when she opened it and gave her command.
"Go fetch Thunderlane from room three-oh-nine. I need him here to help with a scared colt." The other pony hesitated at this, even while the clothed mare's resolve hardened and her face grew stonier to show it.
"He's still healing from wing fractures, is now the best time?" My rescuer paused, glancing back at my shivering figure. By this point, I'd fixed my vulnerable belly-up position and had managed to untuck the blanket enough to wrap myself in it as I crouched on the mattress. I'm sure I made a pitiful sight, trembling there with wide, teary eyes and pinned ears in a fabric cocoon of my own making.
I made sure to pour on the pathetic show all I could, having drastically changed my plan of action. If I couldn't threaten her in this body, then maybe it was best to evoke as much sympathy as possible. The more I resembled a kicked puppy, the greater the chance that she'd leave me alone, if only to save her poor eyes.
As a human, of course, this never would have worked; a vulnerable man was naught but a target for a whole slew of unpleasant experiences. I had learned that the hard way. Perhaps, though, as a fuzzy pony child, I possessed an entirely different arsenal of defenses.
That was assuming females had a single merciful, sympathetic cell in their bodies, which I wasn't sure of.
"He should be recovered enough to help with this. Fetch him now." The muzzle poking out of the doorway bobbed as the pony it belonged to nodded vigorously. The exit was at an angle such that I couldn't see much outside--only a glimpse of sterile white hallway--but I could imagine the expression on her face as she backed away.
"Of course, Doctor Redheart." Hurried hoofsteps denoted her rushing off and that was that.
For a downright-shocking length of time, nothing much else occurred. I expected this Redheart to approach me again or at least engage some form of conversation. Instead, the mare left the open door and settled herself on the sterile floor, neglecting to so much as look at me.
While not ideal, this was by no means the worst possible outcome of her remaining. I eyed the door and considered making a run for it, but quickly dismissed the idea altogether. Clearly, it was time to gather some insight as to why I was here and what they planned to do with me.
Proactivity was certainly not my strong suit and I struggled to muster up enough confidence to speak, but eventually the childish tones of my new voice echoed timidly through the room.
"Who's Thunderlane?"
The doctor's ears perked at my question and she glanced up at me, evidently surprised I dared ask it. I made steady eye contact with her, deeply wishing my face showed rebellion and anger instead of the anticipation and fear it no doubt expressed. The mare, in turn, looked away first and addressed the wall instead, which did make me a little more at ease, I'll admit.
"He's a patient here at Ponyville General. Very kind and fatherly to foals." Redheart closed her eyes and breathed slowly through her curved muzzle, shifting slightly in her spot laying on the floor. "I'm hoping you'll get along better with him, since he's a stallion." My ears perked in hope at this and I scooted forward a bit on the mattress, running the word around in my head a few times.
Stallion. A male horse. Someone able to understand me better and who wouldn't try to do...things...without my consent. I hadn't ever really had that many male friends, or even met many at all. Despite this, I was sure Thunderlane would be happy to help a fellow guy out. Maybe we could escape together and get away from all these freaky mares.
"Are you gonna hurt me?"
I blinked rapidly, surprised equally at both my own question and the vulnerable tone it carried. The answer, of course, was obvious and one I knew no matter what the mare said. She shook her head before bowing it, appearing to steel herself. I did much the same, bracing for outrage or something similar.
"No. I'm a doctor. I help ponies." Again, I would have scoffed, but this time I was stopped by the sincerity of her words instead of a lump in my throat. Silence reigned as king once more while I took in the pony laying on the hospital room floor and she remained still under my watch.
Doctor Redheart clearly wasn't like the nurse I'd woken up to. As a matter of fact, so far, she was unlike any female I'd ever encountered. Somehow, my methods of gaining her sympathy seemed to have worked, though whether that was because of my new body or her being different had yet to be decided. Perhaps she did not, truly, intend to use me in some way. Maybe, just maybe, she was actually distinct among all the others I'd come into contact with.
No.
It wasn't possible. Statistically, scientifically, whatever. Every female--every last one--I had met had wanted something from me and didn't care if I wasn't willing. What were the odds that one of them was different? With a data pool the size of mine, I'd say pretty slim.
Did it really matter if this was a different world? My experience with the creepo nurse said 'no' and I was inclined to believe it.
Doctor Redheart obviously, naturally, clearly intended to harm me in some way.
If I wanted to stay in one piece, I had to be sure to remain on high alert.
Just then, a gentle knock emanated from the door and the doctor--slowly, to my relief--rose from her seat to answer it without so much as glancing at me. The polished wooden slab once more creaked open and my eyes immediately latched on the charcoal grey pegasus that strode past it.
Squared, I thought with relief, his muzzle is squared.
Now, don't ask me why or how I knew to look for the shape of the snout, mainly because I'd have no idea how to answer. Earthen horses certainly didn't follow a like pattern, at least not that I was aware of. I began pondering on the nature of equines back home and that was probably why I made the fatal mistake.
By the time I phased back in enough to regain awareness, I found myself clutching onto Thunderlane's foreleg with all the strength my significantly-smaller ones could offer. I blinked up into his golden eyes, thoroughly embarrassed, but couldn't make myself move away. To my surprise and--more importantly--joy, the stallion simply rocked back to his haunches and held me close with both front legs.
"How's it going, little bro? Could you tell me your name?"
I shivered my relief at his deep voice, resisting the urge to bury my face in his barrel like an ostrich in denial. Instantly, everything was better and brighter, but, in that moment, I couldn't be bothered to wonder why.
"I-I'm Heath," was my reluctant reply. I ignored the scribbling from behind me that came afterward, focusing instead on the soft warmth around my barrel. Something about him put me at ease so fast I nearly forgot I was ever worried. My muscles relaxed and I finally registered just how sore everything was.
Thunderlane's downy wings sprung stiffly open and started to wrap around me as well. I noticed both the tight bandages woven around them and his pained grimace, but couldn't make myself care about either. Instead, I leaned my head up against his shoulder and hummed quietly while he grunted with equal volume as the feathers fully embraced my body.
"I'd advise against that. You might further damage something and--" The doctor cut herself off once the stallion gently shook his head.
"It's okay. Anything to make a little bro feel better."
See, already I was being proven correct. This was a level of self-sacrifice I hadn't seen displayed by any girl I'd ever encountered. Can I really be blamed for fearing them so badly?
Sometimes I do wonder if I'm somehow at fault for all of it. Perhaps my attempts to be perfectly average weren't enough, or even had the opposite effect as intended. All I'd wanted was to avoid all that drama and stuff, especially later down the line. Was it really too much to ask to just be left alone?
Ah, but I'm just complaining now and you're probably already more than sick of that. I must thank you for sticking with me for so long, especially when I come off as such a terrible person. Sometimes I do wonder what your motivation for staying by me is, but you don't talk that much so I doubt I'll get much in the way of an answer. I'm grateful to have such a good friend regardless. Heaven knows I have too little of those around.
I was phasing out yet again and I returned to deafening silence. Both adult ponies had been staring expectantly down at me for who knows how long while I gazed vacantly into the ether. Clearly, they were expecting an answer I didn't have and accordingly I looked up at Thunderlane with the sheepish expression of a dog caught eating off the table. To my ever-growing relief, he smiled patiently and repeated himself:
"Where's your herd, Heath? They're bound to be looking for you."
Herd?
Just like earthen horses, then. I supposed that made sense; different species, different rules and all that. I found myself relieved that at least these ponies weren't completely alien. I wondered, then, what the typical family dynamic was like around here and if I would be allowed to get by on my own. I had absolutely no desire to be forced into some kind of adoption situation, which from the way they were looking at me, seemed to be in the cards.
Thunderlane must have seen something in my eyes. Granted, that probably wasn't very hard as I wasn't exactly trying to hide my haunted look, but he saw it all the same. He didn't examine my expression for long before he glanced up over my head and at Redheart with a meaningful one of his own.
"I'll contact Foal Protective Services immediately," I heard the doctor mutter as her hoofsteps went towards the door. "We're not equipped to deal with this." She paused halfway through the exit and I felt myself shiver under her scrutiny, to which the stallion holding me together tightened his grip. "Will you be okay in here alone with Heath?" Thunderlane glanced once more down at me, but I found myself unable to return the look.
"Yeah," he swallowed dryly and I was shifted in place as he took a deep breath. "I think we'll be okay." After this, the mare left and I fully relaxed.
In that moment, I simply couldn't make myself care about the obvious misconceptions they now had about me. Some government body was doubtlessly going to come for me soon and I'd be shuttled off somewhere according to the whims of whoever was in charge. Honestly, that thought probably should have made me much less anxious than it did, but here we were.
"It's gonna be okay, kiddo," Thunderlane comforted as he started rocking back and forth.
If only I could believe that. This time, I did manage to let out a little scoff, which only seemed to make the poor guy sadder. I did feel guilty because of this, but that emotion was far overshadowed by something else entirely:
Fear.