//------------------------------// // Good eatin' with the cattlefolks. // Story: Rodeo Rumble // by HumanSVD //------------------------------// The kitchen was busy, and Arizona wasn’t stopping for anything in all Foenum or Equis. The young heifer remembered all the directions and tips her mother had taught her, which served Arizona well. The cow had decided to make a hefty potato hash for Clyde and loaded it with a hearty portion of ingredients. She cooked scrambled eggs with homemade cheese and chopped green onions, adding her Aunt’s Western seasonings to accompany them. Her mother had the kindness to make flour tortillas ahead of time to spare her the effort. Adding that side would allow Clyde to roll the hash and eggs together if he wanted. Dessert would be cinnamon rolls, and Arizona was also grateful there were enough ingredients for the entire family, including Clyde. Arizona thought to herself, ”Making breakfast for dinner? What would I call it? Brinner? Oh well, it’s good eatin’, and I don’t think he’ll mind.” Once the hash was finished in the skillet, she set it aside to cool off, allowing it’s flavors to mend. She made the remaining hay for her family, a tangible embodiment of her commitment and skill. Once completed, she separated the two dinners off to the side. The dessert baking went without a hitch, and the finished product made Arizona feel a sense of accomplishment. With literally no assistance, she made a meal fit for any hardworking honest family. Not only did the food smell good, but it looked good too. After setting the meals aside and organizing everything, Arizona turned off the stove and efficiently tidied up the remnants of the mess. With the remnants of chaos tidied away, she stepped back and surveyed her hoofiwork. A soft, self-assured whisper escaped her lips, “I did... I actually did it.” “That you did, my little sugar booger. That you did,” a voice chimed in. Turning around, Arizona met her mother’s gaze, finding an expression brimming with pride. It was clear that the motherly cow had borne witness to her young heifer growth, observing her evolve into a more seasoned and capable heifer. Approaching her daughter and inspecting the food with a discerning eye, Minnesota whistled appreciatively, “Now that there is a food fit for country folk! Clyde has no idea how much he’ll love it. Except there’s one more thing you need to do.” “One more thing?” What in all of Foenum could she be talking about?” “What did I forget, Ma?” she inquired, her curiosity piqued. Minnesota placed a hoof on Arizona head, rubbing her slightly disheveled and damp hair before advising, “You need to get cleaned and get dressed up. Now go on and git, my youngin’!” Arizona wasted no time as she made her way to the bathroom. After a quick shower, the young heifer dried herself and prettied herself. Satisfied that she looked good, she returned to her room and put on her evening dress. After applying her perfume, Arizona inspected herself once more. Her heart raced with a blend of nervous anticipation and excitement as she thought about seeing Clyde. Summoning her courage, the young cow tried her hoof at a few pickup lines, like, “Evening, partner. You come around here often?” and another, “You hungry, big bull?” The cow froze as she gazed at her own reflection before bursting into laughter. “Oh my goodness! Those are some terrible lines. I can’t believe I even said those things.” She smiled, then took a deep breath and said out loud, “Relax, Arizona, you’ve got this.” Satisfied, Arizona walked out into the hallway and noticed that Minnesota was setting up the table. Texas was arranging a chair for Clyde, while Dakota was helping his wife and daughter get comfortable. After the table was set, the family spotted Arizona’s return. Minnesota smiled and said, “Well, you’re all dolled up again! You better be on your best behavior this time.” The young cow lowered her ears in shame and said, “Yeah, sorry about my past behavior. It wasn’t lady-like of me.” Texas chimed in, offering reassurance, “At least you’ve learned your lesson, Arizona. You be the best lady you can be, and he’ll see you for the amazing heifer you are. If not, then he needs glasses.” “Or a kick to the butt,” Dakota interjected playfully. The fathers shared a good chuckle while the mothers rolled their eyes. Baby Kansas watched her surroundings, captivated by the laughter. This helped raise Arizona’s spirits and made her feel hopeful as she imagined having a baby of her own in the future. Texas then asked, “Now why do those ponies call butts ‘plots’? I heard them say it at the bar. Really took me for a loop.” Dakota chuckled before answering, “It means ‘Plot of Land’; hence, you ‘plow’ it. Cause it’s-” Minnesota looked disgusted with the crude language, while Daisy-Jo interrupted her husband, “Stop that nasty talk! It’s not appropriate in the company of ladies, especially our little baby.” Dakota rolled his eyes, but Daisy-Jo wasn’t having any of it. She persisted, “Don’t you dare roll your eyes at me! If you ever want to work on this ‘plot o’ land’ again, you’ll cut it out.” Letting out a resigned sigh, the bull eventually nodded in agreement. Daisy-Jo grinned, satisfied that she had made her point. Minnesota turned her attention to Arizona and offered a lighthearted lesson, “You see, my little sugar booger? You’ve got to keep these bulls in line, or they’ll get all rowdy. Don’t let Clyde act out now.” Texas snorted and chimed in, “And remember no plowing unless you two tie the knot.” Minnesota playfully swatted her husband’s front leg, giving him a scolding look. Meanwhile arizona stood there, her face flushed crimson, ears drooping with embarrassment. She facehooved, and thought to herself, “This is my family. Please don’t act like this when Clyde arrives!” “Someone please put me out of my misery,” Arizona uttered. Her family burst into laughter, and Texas responded, “Oh, come on, Arizona! If your man can’t handle your family, he ain’t the right one for you. Now hold your head up high. Your momma and I didn’t raise no sloucher.” Before Arizona could say anything else, a knock echoed from the front door. The family fell silent, turning their attention towards Arizona. Minnesota prompted her daughter, “Well, don’t keep him waiting.” With her heart racing and breath quickening in anticipation, Arizona prepared herself to meet Clyde. Every step felt heavy as she made her way to the front door. Opening it, she saw Clyde standing there, clean-shaven and dressed in a fresh red homespun shirt, a gleaming belt buckle, crisp pants, and polished brown boots. Surprisingly, his hat was missing, and his hair looked neatly combed. Clyde took note of Arizona’s appearance and smoothly remarked, “Good evening, Ma’am. You’re looking mighty nice tonight.” Suppressing the urge to squeal in delight, Arizona reminded herself, [!] “Control yourself, girl! Act like a lady and accept the compliment with grace.”[!] Meeting Clyde’s gaze, a light blush tinting her cheeks, Arizona responded, “Thank you kindly, Mr. Ford. You look nice as well. Please, come this way. Dinner is ready.” The young cow led the young man to the dinner table as he closed the door behind him. Arizona sensed Clyde’s gaze on her, subtly adding a gentle sway to her rear end hoping he would enjoy the view. As they turned the corner, she halted her little performance, knowing they were about to join the rest of the family. ”Please don’t embarrass me, please.” Arizona silently wished. Before Clyde could exchange greetings with the family, Texas and Dakota exchanged knowing glances, their mischievous grins revealing their intentions. Arizona’s stomach churned with anxiety as Texas asked, “Clyde, do humans understand the meaning of the word ‘plot’?” This prompted sharp glares from Minnesota and Daisy-Jo, who pouted at her husband. Clyde appeared puzzled and questioned, “Yeah, it means a piece of land. Why do you ask?” Dakota chuckled and playfully hoofing a single Equestria Bit to Texas, commenting, “Well, you’ve won that one.” Arizona grumbled quietly, while Minnesota swiftly intervened, “No need to worry about it, Mr. Clyde. Come, take a seat, both of you. Dinner is ready.” Clyde shrugged nonchalantly and gracefully took the spare chair. Arizona followed suit, taking the seat beside him, and discreetly mouthed to her father, “Don’t ruin this” Texas rolled his eyes in response, settling down as the two newcomers took their places. Texas expressed gratitude to the host and welcomed the guest to the table. Once the formalities were over, dinner was served. While typically the host would serve non-family guests first, Daisy-Jo signaled for Arizona to take charge. The young heifer gladly took on the role of serving Clyde’s dinner, skillfully ensuring that Clyde’s plate was generously filled. As the man eagerly received his generous plate, the rest of the family exchanged knowing smiles amongst themselves. Oblivious to the subtle glances exchanged by the other cows, the man’s attention was fixed on the scrumptious meal before him. Once everything was in place, Arizona hoofed it over to Clyde. The man’s eyes lit up at the sight of the food, unmistakably pleased with what he saw. Clyde’s voice carried a touch of nostalgia as he remarked, “A nice country skillet meal. Ah haven’t had one in a very long time. Reminds me of home.” Arizona’s ears perked up, hearing about Clyde’s home and her food being a good choice. Seizing the opportunity, she started a conversation, “Reminds you of home? I’m glad you like the food I made. I hope it tastes just as good.” He turned to the young heifer and asked, “You made this?” “That she did! My little lady heifer did a great job,” Minnesota chimed in proudly, Texan and Dakota weren’t wasting any time eating their dinner, and both bulls nodded in unison. Smiling at Arizona, Clyde said, “Well, that’s certainly mighty nice.” The young cow blushed before saying, “I also made some tortillas. I hope you like them too.” The young cowboy redirected his attention back to the homemade meal. He took a fresh tortilla and rolled it up with the skillet food. While Clyde was engrossed in the food, all the family’s eyes were fixed on him. Beads of sweat started forming on Arizona’s head as her heart beat fast with nervousness. Her cooking skills were about to be judged by her amorous target, and a cow’s cooking skill was a significant deal to a potential husband. Even the rest of the family was on edge, except for Kansas, who chose to start putting her hoof in her mouth while staring off in a random direction. Clyde finally took a bite of the food and slowly chewed the skillet roll-up. His eyes opened in surprise, causing the young heifer to feel alarmed. ”Oh no! Did I cook it poorly? He doesn’t like it. I’m doomed! Doo-” What occurred next caught the family off guard; the man placed the food down on the plate and turned to the young cow. Instead of a look of disgust, he had a genuine expression of gratitude. Clyde placed a hand on her hoof and said, “Arizona, this food reminds me of my mom’s cooking. Ah’ve been away from home for many years now and miss them very much. For a brief moment, Ah felt like Ah was home again. Thank you kindly.” After he gently, but firmly squeezed her hoof, Clyde turned back to his dinner. The man did not notice the young heifer’s reddened blushing face, nor her family’s reactions. And their reactions were varied, mostly approving. Her mother and aunt were beaming with happiness, her uncle gave her a wink, and her father gave her an “I’ll still be watching you two” look before nodding in approval. Arizona now had butterflies in her stomach, pleased she had pleased the man of her heart. She did her best not to stutter and replied, “I-I’m glad you like it, Clyde. Glad to make you feel at home.” Dakota wasted no time, devouring their food at an impressive pace. Daisy-Jo scolded her husband’s rapid eating, but eventually gave up when he paid her no mind, preoccupied as she tended to the fussing Kansas. Daisy-Jo, conceding defeat, fetched a fresh milk bottle and began feeding Kansas. The table remained mostly silent for the next several minutes as everyone ate. However, conversation gradually rekindled as their appetites were mostly sated. Texas was the first to speak up and asked Clyde, “So... Where ya from, Clyde? I figured you weren’t always from around these here parts.” Clyde paused his meal and replied, “Well, Ah’m from a very far place. So far you wouldn’t be able to reach it.” Baffled, Texas pressed further, “Son, that’s a mite confusing to me and doesn’t answer the question. I know there’s a place over east far away where you humans are from. Are you trying to say you ain’t from there?” Clyde adjusted his collar, clearly uncomfortable with the question. Arizona was irritated that her father asked him uncomfortable questions, but realized it was something she would have asked. And it wasn’t an unreasonable question either, which made her reassure him, “It’s okay, Clyde. We’re just curious to know more about you, that’s all.” “Oh, Ah know that. Ah’m just not sure how Ah can answer it in a way y’all would understand,” said Clyde as he took a sip from his water glass. “Well, go on and give it a try. Don’t keep us waitin’, dontcha know?” said Minnesota. Clyde took a relaxing breath and said, “Well, since y’all insistin’ and such, Ah’m from another planet. My people ain’t from around this planet either.” The table went silent as the man dropped the fact he wasn’t from Equis. Confusion was swirling in Arizona’s mind as Clyde sighed and said, “Ah figured y’all’d react that way. Look, Ah ain’t some space alien or something. Ah’m from a different planet, but mah people on Equis came through random portals. All of us were just going about our lives, then found ourselves here. Practically every damn one of us is separated from our families. Some in New Start have intact families, but those are rare. The remaining families are from marriages formed after their displacement.” The man frowned while looking down at his glass, tightening his grip. “Ah miss my family every day. Sure, Ah’ve adapted just fine, but it’s not being able to talk to them that hurts the most. Ah didn’t even get to say goodbye. Ah fell asleep in the field doing... Field work. Then Ah woke up not knowing where Ah was. That was three years ago, but this planet ain’t bad, it's just a mite strange. And y’all have been nice to me too. That said, Ah sure do miss mah home.” As Clyde took another sip of water, Arizona placed a reassuring hoof on his free hand. Surprised, Clyde turned to see Arizona’s sympathetic gaze. The young heifer’s voice was filled with empathy as she spoke, “I’m so sorry, Clyde. I didn’t know any of that. I’m sorry you miss your family. If there’s anything I or my family can do, just let us know.” Minnesota chimed in, reinforcing the support, Absolutely, Mr. Ford. We understand the power of family connections. Your mother must be longing for you. Just remember, we’re here for you whenever you need us.” As Clyde looked around the room, he saw the faces of not cows, but people who knew what the importance of family meant. His melancholy expression gradually gave way to a small, yet genuine smile. Turning back to Arizona, he said, “Thank you kindly, Arizona. I really appreciate that.” His fingers gripped her hoof and firmly, but gently squeezed it. It was right there; Arizona knew she had passed a very important test, which was to support her loved one when he was feeling down. After what felt like an eternity, the man let go and that made Arizona frown for a split second. Clyde returned back to his water and drank some more before Texas asked, “Well, that was quite a revelation. I gotta admit, you got me more curious about the place itself. What was the planet called? Anything else you can tell us about? You can’t leave us in the pasture all alone.” Clyde’s chuckle echoed in response to her father’s statement, leaving Arizona baffled by the cryptic amusement. Whether it was something he said, she’d likely never find out. However, the information Clyde would reveal was about to blow her mind. As he finished his drink, Clyde’s voice resumed, “Yes sir, Ah can but try to keep yer hooves planted for this. Ya’ll are named for states in my country, the United States of America. Except for Mrs. Daisy-Jo.” Arizona put her hooves to her face in shock, while Minnesota could only say, “Oh, goodness gracious!” Dakota merely replied, “My name is a state? As in a country? Well, how about that! Guess them humans have good taste after all, just like you do, my sweet Jo.” Daisy-Jo playfully swatted her husband with a hoof on his foreleg, making him chuckle. Texas, who raised an eyebrow, asked, “Now tell me, son, which of these states is the biggest?” The bull’s demeanor changed into a serious tone, and Clyde just let out a hearty laugh. He relaxed before saying, “Well, that would be Texas. I’m not joking. You’re named after the biggest state in the union.” The large fatherly bull erupted in a cheer, “YEEHAW! Damn right! Texas is the biggest!” Minnesota playfully tapped her husband’s head before scolding him, “Don’t upset the little one, okay?” Texas rolled his eyes and retorted, “Oh, the little calf is just fine. She’s practically bored.” Right on cue, Kansas babbled in an adorable voice, then sucked on her tiny hoof. Everyone either cooed or laughed at the baby’s babbling. Arizona then inquired, “Clyde, does that mean I’m named after a state too?” Clyde’s smile grew as he nodded, and she playfully continued, “Really? Well, I’ll be a rowdy tumbleweed. Which state are you from?” Clyde nonchalantly responded, “I’m from the state of Oklahoma. Ah usually live in the western parts of that state, since that’s where my work was located. My family lives in southern central Oklahoma, though.” “Oklahoma...” Arizona pondered. ”I like that name, Oklahoma. I’ll remember that for later,” Arizona thought to herself. “Well, it’s a fine name. Anyway, I’m real pleased to have you here, Clyde. Now, are you fixin’ to indulge in some dessert?” Arizona asked with a grin. As soon as Clyde nodded, Minnesota sprang into action and got onto her hooves, saying, “Don’t you worry, young’uns. I’ll bring it to you. Y’all just keep on talking.” The following hour proved captivating for the cow family as Clyde delved deeper into his homeland, shared snippets of human history, and offered insights into his family. Apparently, tornadoes were a yearly thing his people dealt with, and Arizona couldn’t fathom having to deal with that. Foenum rarely, if ever, got them due to the lack of cold fronts but they weren't impossible. The ones that did occur usually happened near the east coast and away from any cattlefolk herds. Once dessert was finished, Clyde thanked the family for having him over. Arizona took the opportunity to escort him outside for a goodbye. She intended to seize the opportunity to ask him for courtship, and her heart raced in anticipation. As his back was turned to them, Arizona looked back and saw the rest of the family giving her encouraging looks. She nodded before walking outside the home, alone with Clyde once again. Cautiously, she glanced around, half-expecting to spot Applejack nearby. She wasn’t keen on a repeat of the other night. With the streets relatively deserted, save for the occasional passerby, she addressed Clyde, “Did you enjoy the dinner? I’m happy you joined us tonight.” The man turned around and smiled before speaking, “Ah sure did. Ah haven’t had a meal like that since Ah’ve been here. Thanks again.” The two stood in silence for a brief moment before Clyde inquired, “Is there something else you need? If not, Ah’m gonna go hit the hay.” ”This is your moment, Arizona! Ask him! Reign him in and make him your bull!” Her cowly instincts urged her to take the leap, but Arizona’s courage wavered. As her heart raced, she managed to ask, “Yeah...um, do you travel often?” ”Oh, good one, girl. Ask him that of all things.” The man scratched his head in confusion before answering, “Yes, Ah travel where the money pays. So far it’s been paying nicely here. Ah’m almost settled in here, but haven’t made up my mind if this is where Ah wanna live permanently.” ”That’s what I’m talking about! You got a chance to pull him from this pony place! Now, ask him, girl!” With her legs trembling, Arizona gathered her resolve and inquired, “Well...you see, Foenum is growing, and we need good folks to help build it up. We’re trying to do something on the same level as Appleloosa, just not ‘apple-ly’ themed if you understand me.” The man nodded before stating, “Ah sure do. And Ah think you’re asking if Ah’m interested in going to help out.” The cow blushed and stammered, “Y-yeah, sort of. Details are still being discussed, but I just wanted to let you know.” The man touched his chin with his fingers, appearing to contemplate the idea. Arizona’s heart raced as she mustered up the courage to consider asking him out. While she had never found any bull worthy of her heart before, the possibility of rejection now scared her. This unfamiliar territory left her unsure how to proceed. The man eventually responded, saying, “If the pay is good and there’s a decent amount of food Ah can eat, Ah guess. Ah can't eat grass and Ah do need to eat meat, sadly. Ah know that's sore subject for some but fish or chicken is always good for me. Ah basically need protein as a part of my diet and Ah can't avoid that. Those eggs you made were really good, by the way. But Ah’d need to know more details about what needs to be done. Can’t be no deadweight to any folk.” ”Okay, so he is open to the idea of moving. Now ask him, you coward!” Arizona thought. Taking a deep breath, the cow finally spoke up, “Clyde, there’s something else I need to ask.” The man nodded and encouraged, “Ah’m listening.” She gazed into his eyes and stammered, “C-could...could you talk with me after the Rodeo is over? There’s something else Ah wanna ask, but Ah think it should wait until I win an event in the Rodeo.” The man appeared puzzled and inquired, “Why wait? Is it related to building up Foenum?” ”Just ask him, you coward!” Arizona thought. Taking another deep breath, she turned her head to the side, a faint blush gracing her cheeks, as she admitted, “Yes, but...I’m not comfortable asking that just yet. I suppose I need to earn some Bits and stuff.” Clyde merely shrugged, remarking, “Suit yourself. Ah’ll be at the Rodeo the whole time, so you won’t miss me. I’ll be occupied though, so if you see me hustlin’ around and I don’t stop for a chat, it’s just the job. Once the events wrap up, I’ll be free.” As Clyde strolled along the narrow pathway and onto the street, he waved, “Goodnight, Miss Arizona! Loved the dinner and the dress!” ”You weeny wussy, indecisive heifer! He was right there for the taking! You better muster some courage and do it next time.” Arizona thought. The cow knew she had blown her chance to ask him, but she didn’t know why. Her brain recognized it was the best moment to ask, yet her heart told her it wasn’t quite right. She felt the need to prove to him that she was capable of being a fit cow, one who could be strong for him and stand by his side. If she could win a few events, her confidence would be built up, allowing her to show she was a tough country cow, fit for a country man. Arizona watched as the man walked down the street and disappeared from sight. She also admired his tight-fitting jeans and enjoyed the view of his masculine form. Arizona blushed and went back inside. Upon opening the door, her family stood in the hallway, eager to hear the good news. The heifer gulped and thought, *”Damn, time to face the music.”* “So, is he your boyfriend or what?” asked Texas. “Yeah... About that,” said Arizona, her face reddening in embarrassment. She didn’t get a chance to explain as everyone groaned in disappointment. Daisy-Jo shook her head, saying, “You let him slip through the lasso.” “And you didn’t even tie him up well. A real shame,” said Dakota as he headed to the kitchen for a drink of milk. Minnesota then asked, “My little heifer, you didn’t ask him, did you?” Arizona rubbed the back of her head and said, “N-not really, no. I asked if he was open to moving Foenum to help us build it up.” Texas facehoofed and said, “Now, why did you go and do that? Why would he want to move all the way over to Foenum without a damn good reason? Sure, we’ve got money now, but we still need more, and we need more tools. The other elder Cattlefolk are already in Equestria gathering resources, and we came here to gain recognition for our new nation. At best, we’d be able to pay him a fraction of what he’d be getting here, but that ain’t enough to make a cow move.” Arizona lowered her head and sighed, “Y-You’re right, Pa. I turned tail and wimped out. I’ve never asked a bull to be mine. I’m sorry.” Minnesota and Texas looked at each other before Texas said, “Sorry? There ain’t nothing to apologize for. He’s your crush, and it’s your life. We just want you to be happy. You already know how to take what you want by the reins and get it!” Minnesota put a hoof on her daughter’s head and rubbed her hair before saying, “It took me a lot of courage to ask your father out. I was afraid of rejection too, but I wasn’t going to let a prize like him stomp across the prairie without me. I hate to say this, but it’s now or never if you want him.” In a flash, the thought of Clyde getting hitched to Applejack, or worse, just plain disappearing, popped into her mind. There was no way in all of Foenum or Equestria would she just let him go, not without a fight. She was now determined to ask him bluntly if he would date her. Once the Rodeo started, she figured asking him after winning the first event would be enough to build her courage up to get her man. Arizona nodded and said, “Y’all are right! I’m gonna get him at the Rodeo. I’ll make all of y’all proud.” Happy to see Arizona having a plan, the rest of the family started making their way to their bedrooms for the night. Just as Dakota walked out the kitchen door, the bull asked, “Wait, what about that, what’s her name? Apple-something? Ain’t you worried about her?” Arizona snorted and laughed before saying, “Nah, she’s weak. She ain’t got what I have, and I’m gonna show Clyde what I’m made of.” The uncle bull shrugged and said, “If you say so, but I wouldn’t let your guard down. I’ve seen these mares do crazy things around these parts.” As the family cleared the hallway, Arizona stood there, still in her dress. A brief worry popped into her mind before she dismissed it. “Nah, I got this one in the saddlebag.” She made her way to her bedroom, changed out of her dress, and went to bed. Arizona fell asleep thinking of nothing but Clyde’s fit, manly figure, especially his butt. The next day, however, would still prove that the fight was only beginning.