//------------------------------// // Octavia, Chapter 2: P.W.U. (Pretty White Unicorns) // Story: Never Miss A Beat // by TaleweaverTheUnicorn //------------------------------// “And I said, ‘Are you sure you didn’t get your shoe fitting at a tire changing station, darling?’” The purple haired mare finished with a smile, and the gathering of ponies snickered into their cocktails. Octavia failed to understand the humor in the remark, and was in no mood to pretend, particularly given the party in question was yet another white unicorn. She was admittedly a significantly more refined one, clad in elegant blue and white silks, drawn up tight about her hindlegs, with a detailed trail. “Truly, you are a delight, miss Rarity. You grace us with your very presence. Did I not tell you as much, everypony?” Frederick beamed, and Miss Rarity waved off the complement with one gemstone studded hoof.  “Oh pish posh, it is my honor to meet such talented musicians.” She cast them each a look and smile in turn, pausing slightly on Octavia. “So sorry, have we met before, darling? You seem so familiar.” “At the Gala, one before last. As we all did.” Octavia replied. Though, truly, she only  remembered the moment in which Miss Rarity had been coated horn to hoof in cake, a fiasco caused by the very same orange mare that was now associating with a drunken Vinyl over at the bar. Birds of a feather, apparently. Miss Rarity must have followed her gaze, for she said; “Do you know Applejack, as well?” She was considered, and weighed. Rarity’s eyes lingered specifically on her tie, and then she stamped excitedly. “Wahaha! I remember! You come from Ponyv-” She paused, evidently seeing the horror on Octavia’s face, and improvised. “Pooonies of great repute. Your mother is such a dear. I made her a dress not long ago, you know.” Octavia felt in full as her horror was replaced with a sharp impalement of guilt. She had not been home in many moons. Far too many moons. In her preoccupation the conversation turned to other topics, and Rarity sidled up to stand beside her. “So sorry, darling. I should have known not to mention it.” She murmured, tilting her head and flashing a polite and charming smile.  “I’ve had to learn that lesson myself. I hate to even ask, but; Do you remember me?” “Yes, as I said prior. From the Gala.” Octavia replied bluntly, but felt a second stab of guilt as Rarity’s nose scrunched. She was still in such a beastly mood. She resolved to attempt to be kinder, at least for the rest of the evening. And at least to Rarity. “Ahem. Yes. I meant a little further back. You were an older student keeping an eye on my school group, when I was a filly?” Octavia didn’t remember, not a whit, but she was disheartened just the same. One of the fillies she had sat for was now old enough to be a socialite? Perhaps it was time to take Parish’s advice, before it became well and truly too late. “Of course, how could I forget any of my little ponies.” Octavia lied, making an honorable attempt to smile. “Beg your pardon, you did say you spoke to my mother? Recently?” “I did! Such a dear. She is doing just fine, as is her-” Rarity lowered her voice “Her farm.” “That is. . . a relief to hear.” A knot loosened in Octavia’s shoulder, one she had quite forgotten about. Rarity smiled. “Well, she’s had an extra hoof lately, as you well know-” “Pardon? I certainly do not know!” Octavia started, and Rarity coughed. “Oh, well, my apologies, perhaps it hasn’t been announced yet? Aha ha” Rarity tugged slightly at her hat with magic, avoiding her gaze. “Well, ahem, your sister, ahem, is to be wed?” She flinched, as though bracing herself, however Octavia was too shocked to speak. “It’s true! To one Cinnamon Cider. Miss Cider was in town for the Apple Family reunion some moons back and she and your sister just hit it off. I’m sure you remember the Apple Family?”  “I-” Octavia shook her head, not to mean a negation, but to attempt to clear it. Did she remember the Apple family? It was familiar, but no faces sprung to mind, no names broke the surface of her thoughts. “Pardon, yes. I remember the institution.” “Institution, indeed. A true pillar of the community.” Rarity sighed, a melancholy sound, tinged with affection. Her eyes, filled with ennui, tracked something across the room. “Here, darling, allow me to introduce you to the heiress-”  “Applejack!”  Rarity suddenly called, loud enough to be heard across the party. Octavia jumped vigorously enough that the dragon's share of her drink found itself splattered across the floor. She followed Rarity’s expectant gaze, and found the apparent Applejack, the orange pony she’d noted earlier, forging a path through the guests. They stood aside as she passed, not daring to bar her way. Most unfortunately, the despicable Vinyl was slung over her back like a saddlebag full of jello. Alcoholic jello. “You need somethin, Rare?” The melodious drawl of rural Equestrian ponies immediately brought her back to her youth, surfacing the memories that had been reluctant to breach before. Memories of dragging a plow across fields and hauling sacks of potatoes, laughing with her mother and sister. A visit from a neighbor, a friendly stallion and his lovely star crossed bride, both represented in the face of the pony before her. Apples. She blinked them away, the memories replaced with an orange hoof in the present moment, stretched forth in greeting. “My apologies. Wonderful to meet you” Octavia reached to shake it. She had become so used to shaking gently, repressing her strength, that the firm gesture caught her by surprise, and she returned it with mild satisfaction. Unfortunately, the motion seemed to rouse the drunken mixed-bag of musical talent and trashy personality that was Vinyl, and she murmured, half conscious. Octavia frowned. Applejack gave her a strained smile. Rarity appeared not to notice, carrying on with the introductions. “You will never guess, but this lovely filly here? Her sister is soon to be wed to your dear cousin Cinnamon!” Rarity gushed, drowning out additional murmuring from Vinyl. “Well, that’s just fine. Pleasure to meet you, future cousin-in-law.” Applejack did not sound entirely pleased, but perhaps that too was Vinyl’s fault. The silence stretched. Rarity tittered awkwardly. “Ahem. I see you have made a friend, Applejack?” She asked, voice strained ever so  slightly. Octavia cast a surreptitious look in her direction. Was she also irritated with the DJ?  “Ah, just a filly in need of a lift home an’ a place to stay. She played your fashion show back when, y’know. You don’t remember?” Applejack shrugged her shoulders slightly, the motion carrying on down the rippling muscles of her legs and back. She was a very impressive specimen, speaking objectively, of course. The motion jostled the still mumbling Vinyl, who paused in reaching around with wavering tendrils of magic to press a hoof queasily to her mouth. “Uh oh. Best be gettin’ on that sooner than later. Talk to ya tomorrow, Rarity. Good to meet ya Octavia.” She walked back off the way she came, once again wading through the sea of ponies that had closed upon her passing. “Harrumph. Well then!” Rarity muttered. While it appeared to be intended for her own ears only, the volume of it was in truth loud enough to trigger turns of the head from passing ponies. Octavia was unsure of what exactly to do. The sheer quantity of mind-numbingly strange events that had occurred over the course of this accursed evening had left her quite stunned. One thing, however, remained in the forefront of her mind. “She really is quite insufferable, isn’t she?” She responded, quietly, to Rarity.  “Now stop right there! That is my friend you are speaking about!” Rarity snapped to attention, horn and eyes gleaming with sudden anger. “Beg pardon, I was referring to the unicorn, not your friend.” Octavia reevaluated the pony before her. This was no mere socialite. She had spirit.  “Oh! Oh. My apologies. I fear I have had to defend her . . . honor from more than one snob. Not that you seem snobbish! Oh, Celestia, you must think I'm unconscionably rude.”  Rarity adjusted her dress with furious spots of sapphire magic, a lovely contrast to the bright ruby flush that graced her cheeks. “I do not think that at all. I was merely commenting upon your initial statement, about which I made the incorrect assumption that it was related to Vinyl Scratch.” Octavia explained, feeling more foolish with each word. “And then you made the incorrect assumption about my statement that I was speaking about your friend Applejack, whereas I believe we were each speaking of our own annoyances and now we are both quite confused.” She gasped a breath, and Rarity burst out laughing. “Yes, I suppose that is what happened. Truly, Miss Melody, we are two of a kind, if it is not too bold to say.” Rarity stepped closer as she spoke, a revelation to the room that a camaraderie was forming. “It is simply insufferable, isn’t it?” “Oh, certainly. This whole night has been a particularly intense test of my patience.” Octavia allowed herself a small smile and a tiny giggle. Rarity pressed a cider into her hoof, noting the apple marks on the bottle. “And they have a way of popping up everywhere, do they not?” “Yes. . . It seems so.” Rarity took a drink, taking just too long of a pull for polite company, Octavia followed suit. “So, how did you realize it?”  “I suppose. . .” Octavia hesitated. “I suppose it started with seeing her in the paper.” “Oh, that’s precious.” Rarity gushed, practically dancing about with excitement. “Before you even met her, like it was fated.” Octavia gave her a strange look. Fated hate? Was there truly such a thing? “Do you think things like this can be fated?” Octavia asked, taking another large sip. “Oh, no doubt in my mind, darling.” Rarity fluttered her eyelashes. “You don’t choose who you fall in love with.”  Octavia, in a stunning feat of self control, managed to angle her face away from the unicorn before spraying a muzzleful of cider over a passing pegasus waiter. What? What in Celestia's Green Equestria? Did she think? How could she think that! “Oh darling,” Rarity was pressing her lips together hard enough she had trouble speaking, a smile constantly threatening to break loose. She idly cleaned the waiter's uniform, ignoring the pony’s requests to release him. “Should I have not said it in as many words?” “That’s not it! I don’t love her, I despise her. I despise her and her music and her stupid blue mane! That rowdy style, lookin like she jus’ rolled out of bed!” Octavia paused, taking a breath and fixing her speech. “And not only that, but she somehow manages to win two awards, and can’t be bothered to give the proper speech or even remember them! Were that not enough, she stole my rightful newspaper recognition, thus directly affecting my work-” She paused again, this time taking several breaths. There is more, oh Celestia there is more, but remember, Octavia. Manners. Control. She turned to Rarity again, nodding her apology. Thankfully, Rarity seemed more amused than distressed. “I suppose I must have misread the situation yet again, darling. So sorry,” She did not seem particularly sorry, but it was quite possible Octavia’s ability to read ponies was not precisely at its peak performance now. “Or perhaps I was simply projecting, hmm?” “Per. . .haps,” Octavia did not know what that meant, but she’d be sent to the moon before she admitted it. She made a blunt attempt to derail that train of thought. “Would I be amiss, then, in presuming that Miss Applejack has caught your eye?” “If you recall me from the Gala, you must recall that my date of the moment was Prince Blueblood, yes?” Rarity shuddered. Octavia had never had the displeasure, but he had a reputation. “I just wanted a noble prince, who would always be honorable and chivalrous. You see?” Octavia didn’t, but she nodded. “Alas, I found only one pony who always does the honorable thing, and it happened to be her. The one pony who irritated me the most.” Here Miss Rarity shot Octavia a look of deep amusement, and Octavia felt her face flush hot. With anger, naturally. She turned tail and marched right away, before her slapping hoof could get the better of her once again.  “Darling, darling! Wait! I was only teasing!” Rarity, unfortunately, chased her. Octavia rounded on her, but Rarity did not shy back. “Not another word about it. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye . . . That’s an unbreakable promise!” “. . . Very well.” Octavia drained the last of her cider, feeling a slight buzz start to overtake her. A vicious thought drummed up inside her, and she felt her heated cheeks quirk into a smile. Well, perhaps turnabout was indeed fair play. . . Or maybe all is fair, in love and war would be a better metaphor? Regardless, she spoke: “You must be as displeased with Vinyl right now as I am.” “What do you mean?” “Well,” Octavia relished a long pause, watching Rarity’s elegantly shaped eyebrows climb slowly up her face. “I know from earlier unpleasant experiences that she definitely has an eye for mares. And your Miss Applejack just took her home, while she is immensely intoxicated, no less. Tongues will wag, for certain.” “You can’t possibly be suggesting. . .” Rarity trailed off, as she thought it through, her eyes widening. “She wouldn’t do- I mean to say- She isn’t-” “She is not? Are you quite confident?” Octavia twisted the knife.  “I observed them speaking at the bar, quite closely, before she carried her out.” “No, that’s simply not possible,” Rarity concluded, with a huff. “. . . So much so, I feel the need to prove it! You’ll come, of course?” “Of course,” Octavia said, naturally. Why would Octavia help this filly with something this sordid? And spying at that? It was really none of Octavia’s business, no matter how curious she was. Wait, what had she said? “Oh, you’re such a dear. Now, we need a reason to follow them. . .” Rarity spoke casually, seemingly unaware of what she was doing to Octavia’s mind.  “Scratch left her awards by the coat check. I would be quite surprised if she remembered to pick them up.” Octavia’s voice betrayed her once again. What was she doing? Why would she agree to any of Rarity’s madness? She prided herself on being generous, but that usually meant charity, not. . .  whatever this was! And she was certainly no gossip, to be chasing after juicy tidbits. “Oh, what a clever idea! Let me seed this with the crowd. . . You go fetch the statues!” And so it was that Octavia, despite mental protests at every stage, found herself hauling both statues down a litter covered sidestreet at eleven forty in the evening. Rarity, naturally, knew the ‘motel’ where Applejack would be staying. Apparently a cousin, the Orange family, owned the place, so they could get free rooms. Which was good, because Octavia couldn’t see much else to recommend the place. Rickety looking screen doors rattled over the entrance to each room, and the smell of the bay washed over the place, giving it a slight salty, fishy aftertaste. The glowing sign read ‘Steady and Stable’, a classic franchise. Rarity scanned the lot, magic gleaming like a faint spotlight, sweeping dark corners and the windows of parked carriages. “Now, we must find a window.” She said, apparently satisfied. Somehow, she had found the time to change into a sharply trimmed trench coat, which would be perfect for stealth were it not a bright purplish color. She had it slightly hiked up around her ankles, presumably to avoid trailing it on the ground. Between that and her frazzled face, the effect was barely short of manic.  “Why on Celestia’s green Equestria would we want to do that?” Octavia said, exasperated. She adjusted the heavy statuettes with a flex of her back. “Let us just knock, for goodness sake!” “Darling!”  Rarity said by form of reply, and crept on tiphoof around the side of the building. Octavia sighed and followed, her resistance utterly broken by the strange and unstemmable tide of favors she was doing. The two of them slipped around the office, and began passing many identically draped windows. Rarity counted each under her breath, and when she got to the seventh, pressed her ear against it immediately. “It appears to be covered. Unsurprisingly.” Octavia deadpanned as best she could while peering into the window herself.. Rarity shushed her loudly, and pressed her ear closer, flattening it against the cold glass. A small ring of frost melted around the organ, and snow began sticking to her coat as she sat there, still as a statue. “Miss Rarity-”  “SHOOOSH!” She hissed once again, even louder than before. “I am trying to eavesdrop! I hear her voice and conversation, so again I implore you to Shoosh!” Ocatvia shushed, but the rattling of her rolling eyes could likely be heard clear across the city. How did she keep finding herself in these positions? First Parish dragging her to clubs, now this. Octavia suffered a dawning realization of how much Rarity and Parish had in common. No wonder Rarity could twist her around her hoof.  “Now see what you’ve done!” Rarity groaned. “They’ve stopped! I can’t hear!”  “Uh, who are you, and what are you doing here?” Octavia turned, heart plummeting, at the raspy voice from behind her. Alas, her career, shut down prematurely by an arrest record. . . Fortunately, the ostentatious rainbow maned filly was not wearing a badge, just a bemused look. “Are you fans or something? Wait. . . Rarity?!” The pegasus’ jaw dropped so low it nearly scraped the ground, despite her hovering a few feet above it. “Ahaha, why hello there Rainbow Dash! What are you doing here?” “I’m. . . staying here.” Rainbow said, flatly. “Why are you hanging out at my window?” “Your window? But the mare at the office said that the DJ was staying-” “Yes, my window.” Rainbow landed, giving Rarity a flat stare. “And yeah, she’s here. Applejack asked if she could park her in my room, since I had a spare bed. Applejack is next door, with Applebloom.” “But I heard her voi-” “She had to come in to drop off the drunk girl, and we got to talking.” Dash flicked her tail, her flat stare further compressing before turning it on Octavia, pretty pink eyes lingering on her tie. “My turn now, who's the nerd?” “Nerd?!” Octavia exclaimed in disbelief. Rarity patted her consolingly. “This is Octavia, she’s a dear new friend. We were here to, ahem, drop off Miss Scratch’s awards? That she won? And then forgot?” Rainbow paused her flat stare to raise a suspicious eyebrow. “And you wanted to drop them off. . . through the window?” “Well, it sounds silly when you say it like that.” Rarity tittered the last word. Octavia allowed herself to sink to the ground. This was surely one of the most foolish things she had ever been involved in. All for her own morbid curiosity and a socialite mare she barely knew. She cast her gaze to the sky, yelping when she found it intercepted by the blue pegasus. “You alright there?” “No!” Octavia mumbled. She allowed her furious hooves to beat a staccato tantrum against the pavement “I’m not alright. I am not all right either, nor am I okay. I am, in point of order, quite terrible. I’m a victim of some kind of enchantment, having been ensorcelled somehow, since that is the only reason I can imagine as to why I’m lying in a parking lot at midnight. Not only that, but I’m here to supposedly spy on my old neighbor from Ponyville and the filly I hate most in this world!” She sucked in a hot breath, which propelled her to her hooves like a balloon taking flight. “No more!” She said, storming off. “I’m going to my hotel!” “Hey, wai-” “Darling, you still-” “NO!” She yelled, trot turning into a gallop. White unicorns and magic and insanity! Why was this her life? “No waiting, and certainly no stopping! I. Am. Going. To. Bed!” “The statues! You still have the statues!” Rarity yelled, but alas, Octavia was gone.